


Levi x Reader Oneshots

by anlian_aishang



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:13:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 39
Words: 99,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25092925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anlian_aishang/pseuds/anlian_aishang
Summary: A collection of my Levi x Reader oneshots, both sfw and nsfw. Navigate by chapter!
Relationships: Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Reader, Levi/Reader
Comments: 43
Kudos: 496





	1. Pet Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader loses their furry friend. The loss does not go unnoticed.

“Dismissed!” the Squad Leader brought his right fist to his heart to signal the end of afternoon training. Glancing at your pocket watch, you were affirmed: the day had been called off a little early. Rain clouds had been looming all afternoon, but they were darkening quickly. Just as everyone began to filter into the barracks, rain began to trickle. _”The right call”_ you thought to yourself. If only he had dismissed a few minutes earlier, you could have avoided getting wet at all, but a few heavy raindrops managed to dampen your hair and jacket. Smirking slightly, you noted to make a quick change of clothes after your errand.

After long days of training, you always made a quick stop at the mail office to check for letters. Seemingly simple, this routine gave you something to look forward to through grueling sessions. They would lighten up your mood just in time for dinner, so you could be a cheerful presence with your fellow recruits for the meal. Though you were diligent in communication with your parents, it was always a pleasant surprise to receive mail from outside.

“Mail for (Y/N)?”

The attending soldier turned briefly to a shelf behind him, “Yes, a letter and a parcel,” and handed you the mail over the counter. 

_A parcel? What a treat!_ A giddy grin came across your face. As expected, they were both from your parents.

As you had been taught, it was best to open letters first, then the present.

You would never have expected the contents of the letter to make you forget the package.

// // //

Legs heavy, you sluggishly climbed the stairs away from the main floor. The bell signaling dinner rang loud and clear, even from the halls of the sleeping quarters, but you paid no attention. Your stomach was empty, completely pitted in fact, but the idea of eating anything made your stomach hurt even more. Furthermore, your current state would only put a damper on everyone else. Hopefully no one would notice your absence. It would be best for everyone if you were alone and away right now. 

Though usually a swift trip, the walk to your room felt miles long today. Left hand clutched around the letter, your right hand reached into your pocket and pulled out the key. It felt heavy, perhaps explaining the shakiness in your arms. The blur in your eyes caused you to clumsily jab at the door a few times before finding the lock. Thankfully, none of your five roommates were there. 

You shut the door as cautiously as you could manage, and attempted a deep breath. It was a tactic you regularly relied on to compose yourself. Five deep breaths, and you could usually ground yourself. Slowly and gently sitting on your bed, you closed your eyes. Tears leaked out from this blink. Instead of wiping them away, you allowed them to trickle down as you focused on your breathing. 

Deep inhale in. Hold. Exhale smoothly. 

However, for the first time since you could remember, your exhales were all wavering, even at the end of the fifth breath. A slight whimper of frustration let itself out. A long day, rained on, the news of your pet passing, your tried and true method failing. Keeping quiet was your main focus, you did not want anyone to investigate where the noise was coming from. Still, impulsively and against your better judgment, you peeked a teary eye open to look at the picture on your bedside table: you and your pet on adoption day ten years ago. 

Upon this sight, you hurriedly gripped the frame and clutched it to your chest. Finally, it had to come out. You clenched your teeth together as best you could to closet your gasps. The corners of your mouth once flat were now twitching downward. Tears once leaking were now streaming. Loneliness came over you. Roommates away. Friends downstairs. Your parents towns away. Now, your pet never to be seen again. Only the sound of rain hitting the window accompanied. Rain on your hair and shoulders blended with tears. It was the definition of a pathetic sight.

Overwhelming guilt swallowed you whole. _Why didn’t you spend more time at home? When didn’t you spend more time with them when you were home? You should’ve played with them more. You should’ve given them more treats. You should’ve shown them more love._ These thoughts invaded your mind, placing tremendous shame on your shoulders. _Such a failure. A horrible owner. You didn’t even say good-bye to them._ You lapped your palms over your mouth to muffle cries. Your body felt as though it had been stepped on, crushed under incredible force. As such, you succumb, lay down, and throw an arm over your mouth to quiet your sobs.

// // //

Even after receiving the most surprising news possible, and having shared a room for many months, you were startled when three rapid knocks hit the door. You held your breath with anxiety, you were not up to talking to someone right now. Hopefully they would get the hint and go away. Fifteen seconds pass. The same three knocks repeat. 

You sniffled and sighed, “Who is it?! I’m sorry but I’m just not really in the mood for dinner right now.” A broken whimper trailed the end of your sentence.

Definitely not one of your female roommates. There was a male throat clear on the other side of the door, “Captain Levi.”

 _Oh shit. I just yelled at him_ … you jumped to your feet, wiped your tears away on your sleeve, and threw the door open. Once again, not as expected, he did not seem angered by your standoffish greeting. Rather, he was as approachable as you had ever seen him, not in his uniform but in his casual grey long sleeve and black pants. It was one of the few times you had seen him without 3DMG. Even more touching, he held a well-organized tray of today’s dinner: soup and bread.

“You were not at dinner today.” He said in monotone.

You sniffed again, trying to quell the ruggedness in your voice, “Sorry, I am just not hungry today, sir.”

“You need to eat. I am not leaving until you do.” Levi walked diligently past you, entering your room and setting the tray on your nightstand. He stood beside it with crossed arms. 

Apart from the reputation he had in the Survey Corps, you had heard rumors of his time in the underground. It would be disrespectful to your authority, and even more so to someone who grew up hungry, to refuse this meal he brought you. You returned to sit on your bed and picked at the roll, still sickened by the thought of eating. Picking at the roll reminded you of times you would sneak food to your pet under the dining table. Already, tears began welling in your eyes again. You kept your eyes fixated on your hands, trying to pretend he wasn’t there in this moment of weakness.

Levi tilted his head down toward you, “(Y/N), are you sick?”

 _Heartsick_ you thought.

“Your eyes are red, you’ve been sniffling, your voice is… Did you catch a cold from the rain?”

The anxiety of crying in front of your captain could no longer silence you. Your hands shook as you let out a whimper. Trying to lessen your appearance, you wiped your eyes on your sleeve and bit your lip, instinctively running a hand through your wet hair.

“Hey,” Levi knelt to the floor in front of you, “hey…?” nervously this time.

“I’m sorry Captain,” you sobbed, “it’s j-j-just that…” 

You opened your bleary eyes to meet his of concern, concern of a level you had never seen in him before.

You two met gazes for a moment. His eyes darted around you, trying to make some sense. Maybe it was the letter, maybe it was the picture, maybe it was the sound of the rain, but he was quick to size up a situation. 

He took a pause before quietly speaking, “I’m sorry for your loss.”

Demonstrating your weakness in front of humanity’s strongest made you nervously tap your foot, “N-no.. I’m sorry, Captain, I’m okay, really….” You painfully attempted a smile, unconvincing with your flushed and tear-streaked face.

“It’s okay. You can just call me Levi.”

A breathless and nervous chuckle fell through your fake smile. You bit down on your knuckle, once again looking downward to avert his genuine stare.

Suddenly, he sat himself beside you on your bed. He was clearly nervous, but also sympathetic. He took the bread roll out of your hands and set it back on the tray, his calloused hand filling in your empty grip. It was all just so much. You placed your right hand on your hot forehead, trying again to contain yourself. With this, Levi reached his arm around your shoulders, pulled you closer, and lightly rubbed your arm.

“(Y/N), I’m so sorry.”

More sobs. He gently tightened his hands.

“I am sure you were a great owner.”

You shook your head no, still buried by grief.

“Hey, listen to me, (Y/N)…” a typically threatening sentiment, but spoken with absolute kindness, “I have seen the way you treat others. You’re the first to pick up a fallen comrade and the last to line up for meals. Your selflessness can be a detriment sometimes, but it is paralleled by no one, no soldier I have ever met before.”

Your heart jumped. _Perhaps the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me?_

Levi took a breath before continuing, “I notice these things. When I saw you were missing from dinner, I thought you deserved someone helping you out for once.”

Silence, apart from the sound of raindrops, filled the air.

He briefly turned his head from you, “…I’m sorry I tried to make you eat.”

You snapped your head to him, “No! No it’s okay Cap-” you swallowed “-Levi, I am really just touched that you thought of me. Really… thank you so much.” You flashed a smile again, though this one was not a struggle to form.

Levi nodded, “Of course.” He lowered his hand from your shoulder to the middle of your back and gave two pats. Immensely comforting. _Maybe this could be my new fool-proof grounding method._

He had done so much for you, completely unprompted, picking up the pieces. Knowing your mom, you were sure the package she sent had some comfort items to accompany the letter. You reached for it and motioned it towards Levi.

“Here, thank you for helping me… I want you to have this.”

Levi opened the package with a bit of confusion. The contents didn’t exactly fit the norms of a thank-you present. It was a handful of tissues and a few homemade cookies with a note that said, “XOXO-Mom”. 

Levi smirked slightly, “I think you could use these more than me…” 

He took one of the tissues and wiped your face dry. He held the tissue above the bridge of your nose. His commanding voice took hold as he ordered, “blow.” 

Disciplined you did so without thinking, finally able to breathe through your nose again. His clean-seeking self couldn’t help but grimace, but you did look pretty cute.

Levi stood up to throw the tissue in your trash can. 

A look of thought crossed his face, “Come with me. Bring some pajamas. You can use my suite to take a nice, clean, solo shower. Warm up from the rain. And-” he cleared his throat, “if you’re comfortable, you can stay in my room tonight.” 

_Speechless._

“I imagine one roommate is more tolerable than five, especially if you’re needing some privacy.” Levi placed a hand on his hip.

Your heart jumped to your throat, “I, umm… are you sure, Levi?” You were merely a recruit, but he was treating you like a princess.

“Yes, really. Then if you need any comforting, I’ll be there. I don’t get a lot of sleep anyways.”

You blushed as a flattered smile came across your face.

“That’s right. Meet me there whenever you’re ready, I’ll show you how to turn on the hot water.” Levi grabbed the tray to discard it for you.

When he reached the door to leave your room, he turned towards you once again, “(Y/N), I want to say one more thing… I’m sure they were lucky to have you. Anyone who knows you is.”


	2. Short, Cute, Sleepy Reader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shorter than him? Cute as a button? Sleeping on duty? Reader takes Levi’s interest in more ways than one.

_“Back of the line for dinner again,”_ you sighed to yourself. Normally you did not mind, but you were especially hungry and fatigued this evening after a long day of training. 

In a back-to-back measurement with Christa, you two were virtually tied as Ymir’s hand could rest flatly atop both your heads. Being this height had its pros and cons. For instance, you were usually last to be cold-called in class as soldiers nearby would overshadow you, but you were also last to be in line for meals as soldiers easily pushed past you. Such was the situation you found yourself in again today. All of your fellow Survey Corps recruits were ahead piling their trays. Your stomach was rumbling as you crossed your fingers, twiddled your thumbs, and longed for your turn at food. 

However, there was something different about today. Someone had actually lined-up behind you. You didn’t want to be rude, but you could not pinpoint who it could be… all your fellow recruits were accounted for ahead. Curiosity got the better of you and you glanced over your shoulder. There was Captain Levi with his arms folded, eyes fixated on you before you could complete your head turn. You rapidly started to look back ahead when his deep voice called you. 

“Hey,” Levi started.

Slowly, you reverted your gaze back to him. It was rare for Levi to tilt his head downward to meet someone’s eyes, but you had him doing just that. 

As a new recruit to the Survey Corps, you hoped you could someday feel comfortable enough around everyone in the division, but for now, you were still getting acquainted. Anytime you were expecting a meeting with a senior officer, you prepared your psyche. You read up on the history of formation development before Erwin’s lecture. You prepared questions for Hange’s titan Q&A session. There was no way to prepare, however, for a surprise one-on-one conversation with the one and only Captain Levi.

“Good evening, sir,” you turned your lips into a nervous smile. 

Levi nodded in response. “You’re new here. What’s your name?”

A lump in your throat, you managed to present yourself after a throat clear, “Recruit (Y/N), sir.”

“Ah,” Levi’s eyes widened, “so you’re the one on lookout with me tonight.”

_Umm…. what?_

Recollection raced through your mind. _That’s tonight?_ New to the schedule, this assignment had slipped your mind. You were so exhausted from the day already. Now you had to pull an all-nighter with and under the captain’s watch? 

Arms still folded, Levi raised an eyebrow at your perplexed expression.

“Right, right! Yes- yeah… that’s exactly right,” your nervous smile faded in an attempt to look grounded. A pink blush spread across the middle of your face.

“…righttt,” Levi’s voice trailed, clearly skeptical. “Seems like your nap ran a little long… mine too.” 

You had had no such pre-lookout nap. _Great,_ you thought, he would be wide awake for the whole shift. There was absolutely no chance you could sneak a nap in.

“‘Tch, the food will be cold by the time we get up there.” Levi motioned his head toward the meal ahead.

“Yeah, probably…” You brushed your hair behind your ear, inadvertently revealing more of your face, “To be honest, I am getting more and more used to lukewarm food at this point,” you shrugged an upward glance to him.

“Oh…?” a higher intonation.

“I- I mean… it’s just that… I’m usually last in line,” you chuckled nervously, as to play off your disappointment. Not wanting to give off any hint of dissatisfaction with the regiment, especially to your superior, you insisted with a smile, “but it’s fine, really!” 

With a slight tilt of his head, you swore you saw a tinge of pity in Levi’s expression. 

“Hmph… we’ll have to do something about that…” Levi gave you a slow blink.

The heat and color in your face spread even more. 

After the seemingly eternal but short conversation, it was finally your turn to serve yourself. Working from left to right, you grabbed a fork, knife, napkin. When you noticed that the entree of the day was soup, you turned back to grab a spoon. As you turned, Levi already had his attention on you, he had also already thrust a second spoon toward you in offering. 

_Did he notice I didn’t grab one?_

Carefully, you started to reach for the spoon. Before you could grab it, he instead placed it neatly beside your fork for you. A slight shiver, you whispered, “thank you” under your breath and faced ahead.

Even though Levi was behind you, you could feel his eyes vehemently on you, never letting up throughout the rest of the line. 

As you reached the end, you started towards the table of your fellow 104th comrades until a hand came down on your shoulder. 

The grueling training earlier, unexpected overnight assignment later, the one-on-one interaction with Levi now, all already had you on edge. You let out a tiny wince and scrunched your shoulders together in shock as you fearfully snapped your head back.

The look on Levi’s face, you would have thought he just accidentally stepped on a pet’s foot, it read “what have I done?” Still, he did not lift his touch away. His hand softly clinched your shoulder and encouraged your orientation up to him.

He swallowed, “Hey (Y/N). Meet me back here at sundown.“ He glanced up towards the clock briefly before returning his gaze down to you, “about an hour.”

With an undeniable edge in your voice, you spoke softly, “yes, sir.” 

Just as you had felt Levi’s stare burning into you in line, it felt as though the entire cafeteria was doing the same to you now. Without glancing in either direction, you deliberately fixated your gaze on the tray in your hands as you hurried off to your room to eat alone and compose yourself before sundown. Unbeknownst to you, Levi headed to his room to do the same.

// // //

While eating the meal in your room, you gazed out the window to watch the sky darken. Usually the sunset was relaxing, but tonight it felt like a warning, a countdown to the demanding shift ahead. You took a moment to reflect on your interactions with Levi at dinner. His reputation was so stark, but your impression seemed anything but. Were you a nervous mess earlier because he was being commanding, or maybe you were thrown off as your expectation of him was so different from reality? When you finished up, you accepted your fate, and brought the tray downstairs, ready as you’d ever be for an overnight with Captain Levi.

He was the only one in the cafeteria, reading the newspaper and sipping caffeinated black tea. A good tool for staying awake, too bad you could not afford the luxury these days. Around these hours, soldiers were usually in their civilian clothes or even pajamas. You and Levi were likely the only two still in uniform. You gave him a look for acknowledgement, but he kept fixated on his newspaper. When you entered the kitchen to clean your dishes, he peeked an eye up. You had to stand on your tiptoes to reach the cabinet for trays. He couldn’t believe how short you were…

You walked to where he was seated. This time, you’d try to appear a little more confident. 

“(Y/N) reporting, sir!” You brought your fist to your chest.

Levi closed his reading and set it aside. He stood and mirrored your salute, internally humored by your approach. Normally this sort of thing didn’t require such a formality, but it would be too rude not to reciprocate.

He lowered his hand. “Feeling ready, (Y/N)”?

“Completely ready, sir!” You would not let yourself clam up again. 

// // //

The training for overnight patrol with Levi, you expected to be on pins and needles, but it was actually much more boring than you had anticipated. Maybe a little too boring…

“Tonight, you can start with the upper floor. It’s smaller. I will lap the ground floor. To keep soldiers alert to changes, it is practice to alternate floors every 30 minutes. Paths cross in the stairwell if timing is precise.” Levi spoke diligently.

You nodded, too tired to talk much. It was past your bedtime. It was time to conserve your energy.

Then, with a hint of lightheartedness, Levi saluted you before he started downstairs. You did the same to him. Thus began both your patrols.

One lap. Two laps. Three laps. Nothing unusual.

Four. Five. Six. Nothing.

Certainly it must be about time to switch. You checked the time and your eyes widened. _It’s only been 10 minutes!?_ You couldn’t help but let out an exasperated sigh as you stared down the hall ahead of you. But, with perfect or imperfect timing, you made out something in the distance… a chair up against the wall ahead. It called your name, and you had to approach, it was en route anyways. 

Despite being old, wooden, and rickety, you had never felt such a strong desire to sit in a chair before. Your legs were dragging, arms weak, eyelids heavy. With one last pondering, you went against your better judgement and succumbed to your exhaustion. 

_Just until you hear him coming… Just until you hear him coming… Just until you hear him…_

// // //

When Levi saw you passed out on duty, though disappointed, he had to admit he wasn’t too surprised. You were yawning so much during his orientation, he had started to keep a mental tally for curiosity’s sake. He noticed that every time you two started eye contact, you had to deliberately strain your eyes open to meet his. It didn’t take a genius to recognize you were going to burn out before the shift was done. 

Even if this was a job he could easily do on his own, in his sleep ironically, your current state here would just not do. For one, he could not be caught in tolerance of sleeping on the job. It would completely undermine his commanding reputation. Secondly, you were snoring. Levi clenched his teeth, he had to admit it was rather adorable, but it could draw attention to the situation.

After much pacing and hesitation, Levi went with his gut and looped your arms around his chest. Your snores halted. He was nervous that you would wake up, but even more nervous that someone would see you two in this form. He shook his head slightly and swore under his breath, “what the hell am I getting myself into?” Levi grabbed you just above the back of your knees, and lifted you into a piggyback ride. With this, you let out a soft groan in your sleep. His cheek twitched into a half smile. There weren’t many people short enough that he could carry them like this, but he had you draped atop him without much effort at all. In fact, you were so light….

Now that you were fully situated on his back, he realized he did not know exactly which room was yours. Levi took a moment and thought over the logistics. He’d have to read each door of the female halls in the dim candlelight until he found yours. Thankfully, there were six names per door, six girls per room. It wouldn’t take too long to scan for your name. The both of you were already on the proper floor. You weren’t heavy anyways. It was practical. The only concern was potentially crossing paths with a midnight snacker, and having to stumble through such an interaction. It was worth the risk to get you to bed.

Thus began the search through the halls for your door. There was an underlying edge at the start of this mission. Once every couple minutes, you would slide down a bit and he would carefully boost you back up, halting his tracks to ensure you were still asleep before continuing. There were a few isolated footsteps echoing throughout the barracks, but nothing close by. All in all, it wasn’t going as bad as he had expected, not bad at all actually…

The girls’ sleeping quarters hall was typically quite the stroll. However, even though he was stopping at each door, Levi felt tonight’s trip was going a little too fast. It was undeniably enjoyable. Your heart beat lightly onto his upper back. Your body rose and fell against his with each slow breath. Your sleepy sounds fell mere inches from his ears. All this sensation, though overwhelmingly cute, was also sending chills down his spine. He didn’t get the chance to carry people often, but it couldn’t possibly feel this way with just anyone.

Finally, thankfully, the second to last door of the hall read your name, along with those of your five roommates. When he stopped at your door, you let out a soft moan with the change in motion. So soft, he couldn’t help but sigh to himself and wonder: _How could anyone be this cute?_

Just as he was about to knock, he stopped himself. Of course, he didn’t have the key to your room. The only way to get you in was to wake up one of your roommates. Selflessly, his first thought was the embarrassment and teasing you would get from your roommates, then comrades, then the entire regiment for sleeping on the job. The next thought was the awkward explanation of how exactly a sleeping (Y/N) got delivered right to her doorstep in the middle of the night, which would inevitably lead to his own embarrassment. Levi rolled his eyes at his own misstep in planning.

The only other way… He had noticed the outline of the bedroom key from your starch white breast pocket, but he would never search your pockets while you were asleep. The thought caused his face to flush. Furthermore, the thought of waking you up as he did made his body cringe. In this moment, he was eternally grateful for the lack of light throughout the halls. 

He had spent years in the Survey Corps, but had never dealt with something like this. Levi cursed under his breath, ditched the current plan, returned his hand to your thigh, and headed towards his room.

// // // 

His suite was on the floor below. Carrying you downstairs with you on his back would be difficult. If he could manage, it would be best to transfer you into a bridal style hold. This was only if he could manage of course, he had never done one before and he did not intend to wake you. The stairs were a while away, he had some time to think over the mechanics of the transition. Meanwhile, your tiny snores had resumed regularly. It was so sweet…

Your hair had lightly been tickling his neck, which didn’t bother him. Almost mockingly, something else began tickling his nose. _Shit… Of course…_ Levi thought to himself. He had managed to keep everything else relatively under control tonight, but his small stature did not well-reflect his sneeze. They usually shook his whole body. Under normal circumstances, he would pinch his nose shut, but his hands were preoccupied with you. Damage control would have to do. 

He turned his face into his right shoulder to sneeze, he almost managed complete silence except for an escaped “ _-chu!_ ” at the end. Despite his best efforts to control the noise, the jolt of his body is what woke you up.

“ehh… huh? L- mmm… Levi?” You muttered.

_She’s awake…!?_

He opened his mouth to try to explain why exactly you were draped atop him, but before he could, he sneezed into his shoulder again with a violent shudder, “ _nn’chu!_ ” 

“mmm… bless you…”

Levi flicked his bangs out of his eyes, “huh?”

But you were already back asleep. When he played out the scenario in his head, he had imagined that when you woke up, you would panic, feel immensely confused, or maybe even get angry with him for carrying you around. Your calm return to sleep came as a pleasant surprise after that stressful bout. Levi exhaled with relief.

Just as his heartbeat was returning to normal, a new challenge presented itself. He found himself back where he picked you up. The chair from before was still there. Now was probably the most promising chance at changing your position before going downstairs. He slowly lowered you back onto the chair and into an upright seated position. 

Once again, you showed no sign of waking up. His left arm gently snuck behind your neck as his right arm tucked your knees together. Though he had noticed before, he still could not believe your feet did not reach the ground in this chair. A pang of admiration in his heart, with no one and no lights around, he decided against holding back a grin. He took a moment to take in the view. Then, without any strain, he straightened himself and scooped you up bridal style. He had never carried anyone like this before. It was a feeling unlike any other. He made a mental note to chase it in the future.

It was far from a struggle to carry you like this. Still, he felt relieved to meet the stairs. _Almost there_ he thought. When he lowered his foot down to the first step, your whole body tensed in your sleep, you dreamed you were falling. Levi gasped as he tightened his grip around your body. If not for his quick reaction time, you could have rolled down all 20 stairs. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath to compose himself. He almost dropped the poor thing… he never would have forgiven himself. How could he make sure it wouldn’t happen again? 

Almost as if you could read his mind, you clamped your arms around his neck and shoulders with a soft moan. Levi inhaled sharply at your motion. It was one of the colder nights he had patrolled, but he himself felt a million degrees. With the extra support of your thrown arms, you two traversed the stairs without any more near-catastrophes. 

Levi had walked the path to his room countless times, but none of those times had been so exhilarating as now, carrying a cute bundle of sleep in both arms. He remembered that he actually despised snoring. Other people’s noises contributed to his intense insomnia. But when it came to your sleepy moans, groans, and breaths… not only could he learn to live with them, he was savoring all of them.

Finally faced with the door to his suite, he recognized he could not hold you this way and also unlock his door. He reverted to the last method of carrying someone. In one fell swoop, he threw your upper body over his left shoulder and wrapped his arm around your waist, his right hand now free to feel for the key and unlock the door. With the drastic change in position, you let out a long and deep groan. It sounded so low and exhausted, yet came from such a tiny being. Levi chuckled at the irony as he nudged the door open. 

As easily as he had thrown you over his shoulder, he brought you back to the bridal carry to place you on his bed. Levi preferred to sleep in a cool room, so he left his windows open. However, it was far too cold for you. When he lowered you onto his neatly made bed, you shivered, teeth lightly clattering. _Poor little thing…._

He would not lift the covers over you just yet though. You were still completely dressed in uniform. He’d at least take off your shoes and your belts. Only learned through experience, sleeping with the gear on left painful marks on the skin. He couldn’t bear the thought of leaving them on you, resulting in your body covered in welts. It was made harder with your shivering, but he hastily undid each belt around your thighs, waist, and chest. His mouth hung slightly agape at how tightly you had to fasten your belts- all the way to the last rung. He set them on his dresser and returned to remove your shoes. With a careful grip, he pulled them off swiftly so as not to tickle you. Quickly he noticed that they were way too big for your feet. Your feet were so small though… did the Survey Corps even have combat boots in your size? He warily met his palm with the base of your foot and found his hand measurement nearly identical. _So tiny…!?_ Maybe he could work a deal to supply some shoes that would fit you.

Levi usually dressed himself down to his underwear when he slept, it was undoubtedly more comfortable than wearing the jacket, button down, and canvas pants of the uniform… but you would just have to deal with that bit of discomfort tonight. Despite his deepest and most secretive desires, there was no way he would undress you in this state. Waking up stripped down would be far too frightening for such a little thing. 

Levi took a moment- a few seconds or a few minutes, he wasn’t keeping track- to admire the art. Finally, his trials had you completely at rest. Your mouth hung open slightly, releasing the lightest of sounds. Your body rose and fell steadily at last. Satisfied, Levi took a deep breath and pushed himself off of his bed. He pulled his pristine sheets and comforter over you. It was heartwarming to watch your shivering come to a stop. Lastly, he brushed the hair out of your face. There was an angel in his bed, but it was time for him to get back to his official duties.

At his door frame, he took one last look back to see you balled up under his covers. So small and so cute…. Levi smirked to himself and closed his bedroom door. He’d be back in the morning, having been first in line to grab hot breakfasts for the two of you.


	3. Levi has a cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Humanity’s strongest is helpless to his cold, helpless until Reader is assigned to the infirmary.

Day 2 of medical training under Section Commander Hange. Yesterday was pretty easy: how to apply tunicates, how to administer CPR, how to change bandages. But today was the real deal: on your own manning the infirmary. Considering the chill of late fall but also the lack of combat and thus lack of injuries, you were particularly grateful for some good timing. It would be a relaxing day compared to the demanding drills you normally faced. In a light mood, you met Hange outside the infirmary to sign in.

“How are ya, (Y/N)? Great to see ya!” Hange flashed a grin.

“Good afternoon, Section Commander! I am excited for today’s training,” you met their enthusiasm.

“Listen, research is calling so I’ll keep it brief! The good news: you’ve only got one patient for your shift! The bad news: he’s a handful!” Hange swung open the door and pushed you inside, giving you no time to read the roster of who exactly this handful was. Hange loudly slammed the door on the way out.

It was about 3:00 in the afternoon, so the sleepy grumble from the corner of the room threw you off. _How could anyone be sleeping?_ The commandants were screaming orders at trainees just outside. Midday sun was glaring through the window. You bit your lip to keep quiet, but he was waking up regardless of your efforts. 

“Ugh… what the hell?” Levi brought the inside of his elbow to his eyes, shielding them from the harsh sunlight.

Pretending not to hear him, you held your breath and held still. Maybe he would just go back to sleep?

Levi lifted his arm slightly, revealing his steel squinted eyes, “Hey? Who are you? What are you doing in here?” His voice was weak but terse.

Voice stuck in your throat, you stuttered, “Recruit (Y/N), sir. I- I’m here for part of my medical training.”

Levi sniffed and let out a tired sigh, once again covering his eyes. Only his head peeked from underneath the covers, but you could clearly see a flush. You searched for more clues about his current state. A trash bin at the foot of his bed held only tea bags and tissues, a few of which were scattered about rather than in. A small nightstand had a teacup, a box of tissues, and a few more used ones. Various articles of clothing were spread on the bed and the ground. All signs of a bad cold.

Cautiously, you moved a little closer to your captain, trying to assess the situation. There was no question that he was awake considering the consistent pattern of sniffling and quiet groans. You whispered, “Is there anything I can get you?”

“N- N…” Levi stopped mid-sentence and silently stifled two sneezes into his shoulder, “No, I’b fide. I cad assure you I dod’t need your helb.” With mocking timing, he snatched a tissue from the box, but another did not pop up. After a stuffy nose blow, his glassy eyes looked up to yours, ashamedly and wordlessly pleading for you to fetch the next box.

Holding back a smirk, you nodded, “Right on it, Captain.”

The supply closet of the infirmary was walk-in. It made sense. The Survey Corps had no shortage of injuries and could afford no shortage of supplies. However, you quickly realized the common cold was the least of their concerns. All you could see were bandages, casts, gauze, painkillers, all neatly organized and labeled, but tissues nowhere to be seen. You shut the door behind you and began to dig. The more time it took, the more hasty you became. It had only been a few minutes and Levi was clearly in a bad mood. This was your one job, you wanted to do it right. Strangely enough, as soon as you shut the door to the closet, the louder his symptoms became. He cleared his throat deliberately and sniffled multiple times. The most notable change was his silent sneezes from before were now audible. You could even hear the tickled build-ups.

“Heh… _Ahh… k’kshu!_ Hih… _kk’shu! Hah’ish!!_ _Nguh_ … gross…”

The more he sneezed, the more frantic you became in your search. You felt an increased urge, not to do well in the training, but to help your patient. You had to find them!

But despite your determination, tissues were nowhere to be found. You suddenly recalled– you always kept a few on you, but just that, a few. Five at most. Not enough to hold him over for the hour probably, definitely not the entire day. Bracing yourself to bear the bad news, you left the closet, knit your hands behind your back, and began towards his bed. As soon as you opened the door, his symptoms quieted again, as if he was trying to contain himself in your presence.

As you neared his bed, you lifted your gaze from the floor to Levi. He had since sat himself up, a pillow sandwiched by his back and the wall. His sheets had slipped down to his hips, revealing his chest and abdomen. Both of which were barely covered by an unbuttoned cotton long sleeve. You realized, this was the shirt he usually wore underneath the tan jacket of the uniform. Come to think of it, the clothes thrown around the room were the rest of his uniform. _No pajamas?_

“Captain Levi,” you reached into your breast pocket, “I’m sorry but… this is all I could find.” You gestured your small stack to him.

Levi coughed slightly into his sleeve, “This is all we have?” His voice was rugged.

“Actually, it’s all that I have. I believe the infirmary doesn’t carry cold and flu supplies… only injury materials.”

The disappointment and exhaustion on his face made your heart pang.

“Tch… Well, thanks, but I really should be getting back to my room.” Levi began buttoning up his shirt.

_That wasn’t in the instructions._

“B-but sir… if you need help, I have to stay here so…” you crossed your legs nervously.

“Like I said, I don’t need your help. Hange insist-” Levi’s nose tickled, but it was quickly stopped by a deep sniffle, “guhh… Hange stuck me in here, claiming it’s for quarantine, but I think they just wanted to see me suffer.”

His trademark glare combined with the pink flush across his face gave you contradicting chills. He did have a point, though. The bright sunlight, the noise from outside, the lack of appropriate medicine, being in the infirmary may have been doing him more harm than good.

“I have tea and-” Another tickle. “nghh… all I need in my room, as well as some curtains. This sun is killing me…” He held his head and knitted his eyebrows together.

During this time, you had still been frozen with crossed legs and folded hands, listening intently while trying to piece together the best plan of action. You had no actual authority in keeping him here and he knew it. He threw off the rest of his blankets, preparing to get up, but also revealing his lower half: a charcoal pair of boxer briefs that contrasted the colors of his white sheets and pale skin. He didn’t seem to think anything of it, but you clenched your teeth, holding back the shock of seeing your captain so undressed. It had already been strange enough seeing him so weak, but his outfit, or lack thereof, only threw you off more. A half-buttoned shirt, tight dark underwear, the flush on his face, his body sprawled on white bedding… for a brief second, your mind wandered to a different context. Such a dominant man in such a submissive position made you visibly shudder through another round of chills. You bit your lip, and bit back your daydreaming.

Just when you thought things couldn’t get any more nerve-wracking, Levi stood up, wobbling slightly. There was an audible wince as he held his head in one hand, the other hand clutching the bedpost for balance. He cursed to himself and took a deep breath.

This whole time, you had been keeping your distance from him, but when you saw him lean forward a little too far, you instinctively took a giant step and sprung your arms out to catch him. He was so fatigued and unbalanced, he could not deny your help even if he wanted to.

“Nghh…. S-sorry, (Y/N).” Even in your arms, he was swaying slightly.

“Hey, it’s okay…I’m here. I’m right here. You’re fine…” In this moment, you were intensely grateful that your earlier training had covered how to hold up a soldier. “How about we set you back on the bed for now?” He nodded against your neck in agreement. You gently sat him back on the bed, legs hanging over the edge. You knelt in front of him.

You had made up your mind. _Who cares what the rules say?_ He had to go where he’d be most comfortable. He had to go to his room. You would plead your case to Hange later.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry to trouble you but I have to get to my room. I can write an audit to excuse you later.” Levi continued rubbing his head.

“No no no! Don’t worry, Levi.” It was subconsciously the first time you called him by his first name, it was met without protest. “I’m here to help. We’re gonna go to your room, okay? We just need to get you dressed first.”

Levi opened his eyes slightly from underneath the shade of his hand, a look of disbelief yet also a tinge of gratitude for your compliance. You maintained sincere eye contact with him as you felt around the floor for his pants. The rest of the uniform could be folded and carried, but he could not walk around the barracks in his underwear. When your hands located his pants, you bunched them up at the ankles and encouraged him to slide his feet in. So focused on caretaking, how much you would miss this view didn’t even cross your mind. You slid the right leg up to his mid-thigh, but as you pulled the leg of the left side up, he waved you off with his hand, eyes fluttering shut as he brought an elbow to his face.

 _“Hih’tch! Hit’chu!_ …” Levi tilted his head back, trying to bait the last one out, “hih!…ahh!… _hih’kshu!!_ ” The last one made his body shake.

“Bless you.”

“Dakes…” His stuffy mispronunciation of “thanks” was heart wrenching, both cute and pathetic at the same time. After using one of your gifted tissues, Levi grasped the waistband of his pants and pulled them up all the way. It was time to go.

You sat on the bed beside Levi. The sheets were so hot. You looped your right arm around his back and beneath his underarm. On his own, he wrapped his left arm around your neck, understanding the position you were aiming to support him with. He had been on the providing end many times with his years in the Survey Corps, but perhaps this was his first time on the receiving end of this stance. Together, you both rose from the bed. Though he was relying on you heavily, his physical weight was light. It would be no problem walking him to his room. The most notable difficulty was the heat radiating from his body, he felt a million degrees. This close, you could see the glimmer from his cold sweat, no wonder he had stripped himself down so much. You made a mental note to come back for his belongings later, but you couldn’t have predicted how much later that would be.

// // //

Upon meeting the door to his suite, Levi slowly reached into his pocket and fumbled the key into place. Given the state of his cot in the infirmary, you expected his room to be even messier. But when he opened the door, everything looked pristine. Hange must have quarantined him right at the start of his illness. A smart call, but the quarantine had to be relocated. Unlike the infirmary, his windows had shades, shutting out the headache-inducing sun.

Levi cleared his throat, “(Y/N), can we go to my desk? I just want to…” he sniffed, “nghh… sit up for a while.”

His headache in mind, you whispered, “yeah sure.” When he was within arms reach of the desk, he ducked out from your support and used the desk to steady himself, pivoting around the corner to collapse in his chair. He let out an exhausted sigh and held his head in his hands.

With this sight, you finally realized how bizarre all this was. All throughout your orientation, you had only seen Captain Levi in tiptop shape. Always dressed to the nines with his couldn’t-care-less stare. In addition to his stark appearance, there were the countless rumors about his life in the underground, titan kill count, and disciplinary attitude. Your prior impression of him was all but daunting. Yet, here in front of you now, was a sick and fatigued version of the authority you thought you understood.

A feeling of helplessness unknowingly crossed both of your minds. His was of the desire to be self-reliant, to avoid relying on a fresh recruit like you. Yours was of the desire to aid him, but having no clear idea how.

His labored and congested breathing, you couldn’t help but ask, “Is there anything I can get you? Some soup, tea, an icepack…?”

Under his cupped hands, Levi spread his fingers to reveal watery eyes, “…yes.”

You chuckled. Even in his misery, his characteristic humor was unwavering. You poured some water into a tea kettle, some chicken stock into a pot, and began boiling both. Something was boiling within you as well, a feeling you had never felt before, a deep responsibility to take care of the poor thing. Every cough, sniffle, throat clear, sneeze… every sign of weakness only fueled your burning desire to nurse him back to health. The fact that this was part of a mandatory training had vanished from your mind. Sure you were on duty, but even if this was not required, you couldn’t imagine anything else you’d rather be doing.

Throughout the duration of your cooking, his sniffling had gotten louder and more persistent. Something was certainly itching his nose. When the tea whistled and the soup bubbled, you poured them into a cup and bowl respectively then walked carefully towards your patient. They were burning your hands, but you didn’t notice. All of your attention was on his well-being. Without a clank, you set the hot liquids right in front of him. The steam emitting from both was dually clearing his congestion but also irritating his nose. Foremost, he wanted to thank you, but he’d first have to fight off the itch in order to do so.

“H-…Hey.. th… _hahh_ thanks for… _ahh!_ ” He brought the back of his hand to his twitching nose, “th- thanks for…” His lips slowly parted. His gaze was wavering.

Your heart felt sorry, but your deepest sense of sadism caused a satisfied smile. “Don’t worry about it.” A double meaning regarding both his thanks and impending sneeze fit.

Levi nodded, either in acknowledgment or in preparation for the inevitable, and finally submit “… _kk’shu! Hah’kshh!_.. _.nn_ …. _’tshu!_ Nguhh…”

His watery eyes fluttered open, aimlessly feeling around his desk for his box of tissues, another bout already coming on. You rapidly snatched two tissues and brought them to his nose. He wouldn’t make it in time with his blurred vision and slowed movement.

“Th-Than- _hit’ch! Hih’tsh!”_ He sneezed twice more. “Gahh, I’m so gross…. Excuse me.” He blew softly into the tissues you clutched.

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault.” You removed your hand from his reddened face. You couldn’t tell if the blush was from his cold or from his embarrassment, maybe both. For such a deep voice, his sneezes were so cute.

Levi sniffed once, his nose finally settled, “I was trying to say thanks.”

“It’s nothing really, I just want you to feel better…” This time, your smile was wholeheartedly genuine.

His usually cold stare was instead warm with gratitude. He gingerly began sipping his soup and tea. Despite their boiling temperatures, he was still shivering. You wandered to his perfectly-made bed and took off the top layer. It smelled nice. _A clean freak after all._ Eyes closed, he seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the meal. When you came behind his desk chair and draped the blanket around his shoulders, he twitched in surprise, but the shivering gradually came to a stop. As you blanketed him, you yourself were also blanketed in fulfillment. The annoyed, helpless, lonely Captain Levi from before was now warm, fed, and accompanied. Boasting wasn’t really your thing, but you couldn’t help but feel it was all thanks to your care and actions. Seeing him so adorably bundled, sipping fluids, symptoms improving…. you were internally gawking at the result of your hard work.

After emptying the teacup and bowl, Levi looked up to you through his bangs, “That was the best meal I’ve ever had, (Y/N).”

You giggled, flattered. “Yeah, I’m a real expert at heating up liquids.”

For the first time all day, the first time you’d ever seen in fact, Levi twitched a cheek up into a half-smile. The two of you met pleasant exchanges for a moment, but his face dimmed shortly after.

“I’m sorry about all this.” Levi broke the stare by looking down to his lap.

“Oh, really… it’s nothing!” You held your kind expression.

“You were stuck with me. I’ve been so pathetic, so useless, so -”

“Levi…” you interrupted.

“I ruined your day.” A tinge of angst in his flaking voice.

“It was… uhh…. I was umm…” You awkwardly tried to hide your true feelings, a fear of coming off too strong. But with all the time together and all you had helped him with, why not be honest at this point? You swallowed your pride, “It’s been my pleasure to help.”

“Your pleasure, huh?” Levi unveiled an interested tone along with an equally interested smirk.

“Yep, my pleasure.” You winked for a split-second. It felt right in the moment, maybe you would cringe about it later… but considering his low chuckle, Levi seemed to like it.

“(Y/N)? If I could ask you for one more thing…?”

“Anything.” You truly meant it.

“Would you… uhh… scratch my back?”

Your mouth wavered, trying to come up with words but ending up speechless.

“It’s just… I think I need to go back to sleep, but my insomnia makes it hard. I think it could help?”

“….No, yeah.” You kneaded your hands together, “It’d… be my pleasure.” You bit down on your grin, trying to stay grounded.

Levi rose from his chair, mindlessly unbuttoned his shirt and zipped down his pants. Now down to just his underwear, he folded his clothes neatly on his nightstand. You politely averted your eyes, this wasn’t the time to admire the art. He crawled into bed and under the sheets. His position facing the wall, he turned his neck and pat the side of the bed next to him, encouraging you to hop in too.

With haste, you removed your belts and shoes and joined him, promptly starting to scratch his back, more toned than you could have ever imagined. Before turning back towards the wall, Levi glanced at you thoughtfully.

“With the amount of time you’ve spent with me, the close contact of catching my sneezes, lying with me, scratching my back, and all…”

“Mhm?”

“Who knows? Maybe we’ll have to quarantine you in here too.”

_Uhh…. was that an invitation?_

He teased further, “Captain’s orders.”

“I would take this over the infirmary I suppose…” You tilted your head playfully.

As you scratched his back, some barely audible moans escaped his lips. His breaths were slowing, growing sleepier and sleepier. It sounded like you were doing a good job…

“(Y/N)?”

“Yes?”

“I owe you one.”

“Please, there’s nothing I’d rather be doing.”

An uncertain amount of time passed. Five minutes? Ten minutes? Twenty minutes? You couldn’t tell. You didn’t care. However long it was, he had finally started snoring. You wondered if he always did, or if it was just due to his congestion. Despite his stuffiness, his snoring was light as his shoulders rose and fell. Any time you tried to lift your hand from his back, his breathing became irregular and he squirmed slightly. You recalled his mention of insomnia. If he woke up now, when, if ever, could he go back to sleep? There was no way out for you, not until he woke up naturally at least. You accepted your fate, you were stuck in this bed for as long as he was, not that you minded. You yourself began to feel tired and stared up at his ceiling, thankful for the relaxing shift it indeed turned out to be.


	4. Overworked Reader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader is always doing the most. Just watching them work would make anyone tired.

It was hard to believe that it was only your third week in the Survey Corps. Since day one, you had been up to your neck in your current routine. Wake up at 7:00. Training at 8:00. Lunch at 12:00. Lecture at 1:00. Dinner at 5:00 From then till bed, everyone’s schedule was their own. Armin usually read. Mikasa followed Eren. Sasha, Jean, and Conny all joked around. Whereas your comrades stuck to one habit, you tried to fit in all you could: writing letters, working out, catching up with everyone, cleaning your room, studying. Anyone would agree it was too much to do in one night, but it didn’t stop you. You were a workaholic before enlisting, but even more so now that you had to prove yourself.

Your mind raced over all the things you should do tonight. Yesterday you tidied your bunk, went for a run, and had a chat with your roommates. That meant today should be spent on mental tasks like writing home, reviewing lecture notes, and journaling. For these kinds of activities, you found yourself most productive in the library. There were usually few people choosing to spend their free time there, and if they were, they kept quiet and to themselves. Minimum distraction. Maximum productivity. You changed into your comfy clothes of pajama shorts and a t-shirt. You then packed your knapsack and started towards your workspace.

Armin, Erwin, Hange and Moblit were among those you most often saw in the library. Pushing open the heavy double doors, a new figure immediately stood out. Captain Levi was sitting in an armchair by the fireplace. It was the first time you had seen him in free time. It also happened to be the first time you saw him out of uniform and in his casual grey long sleeve and black jeans. You froze in the doorway, shocked that he was here. _What did he normally do during these hours?_

His sleeves had been rolled up to his elbows revealing his forearms, flexed as he held his newspaper. His shirt was just the right size such that it looked comfortable yet hinted at the muscles underneath. His pants began above his hips, making his legs appear both longer and skinnier. His whole outfit was complimenting his already perfect figure. As your gaze crept up to his face, you were surprised to see he was already meeting your eye contact, raising an eyebrow at your stare. 

Though he said nothing, you felt like you had gotten in trouble, it was the same feeling from elementary school as when the teacher caught you whispering. Panicking, you silently mouthed, “hi” before hurrying to your typical table. Hands were shaky as you emptied your belongings. Eyes were fixated down on them. Blush on your face was still deepening. Pajamas were meant to be comfortable, but they were actually doing the opposite of that. You were completely underdressed in front of your superior. It was not yet time to look back up, God forbid he was still giving you the “Problem?” look. In reality, he was humored by your flustering. Without changing your sights, you felt around for the chair behind you, pulled it out, and sat down. After a few deep breaths, it was time to get to work. Not that you felt completely fine, but there was no more time for composure, you had to start now or else you would never finish.

Deadlines and due dates flooded your mind. _What should I do first? How recently have I written to my family? When was my last diary entry? What should I review from lecture?_

From the prioritizing, stress, lack of sleep, or perhaps all of the above, a migraine started to come on. _No… not now…_ Bringing your fingertips to your temples, you clenched your teeth and held in a whimper. These headaches had been becoming more and more frequent as well as more and more agonizing lately. The pain was immense, but you knew you had to push through it. There was no time to rest. There was too much to get done and you had already made the special trip to do it.

Being the type to place others’ needs before your own, you settled on writing a letter to your parents first. The self-benefiting tasks were saved for later. You ruffled through your spread for a sheet of paper and an envelope. Unfortunately, they were both rather crumpled as you’d packed them too hastily. You let out a sigh. At this exasperation, Levi curiously glanced up from his reading to examine your state. This was unbeknownst to you though as your head was in your hands. The headache was doing a number to you. It was difficult to ignore before, but nearly impossible now that you were attempting to write. Simply trying to recall your day strained your brain. Simply trying to pen the words strained your eyes. The migraine was stealing your mental capacity as well as your physical vision. The page itself appeared to be throbbing. You held a blink for an extra couple seconds, realizing it brought you some temporary relief. Nothing to focus on. Nothing to see. Opening your eyes caused the pangs to return. Maybe you could close your eyes for a little while, just until you felt able, then you could get back to work. Out of frustration and pain, you scrunched your eyebrows together, accepting your mandatory delay.

// // //

A short while later, you were ready to begin. As suddenly as it came, your headache left. This allowed you to promptly continue with your work. You wrote a nice long letter to your family. In fact, you went above and beyond having written each family member individually with a personalized message. Next, it was time to study. You tabbed to your bookmarked page and began underlining new vocabulary. One chapter went by fast. Then two chapters. Then three. You knew you were capable of up to five chapters in one sitting, but three was at least adequate. You felt a bit of shame ending your study early, but it was now time to journal. Of all the activities you busied yourself with, writing in your diary brought you the most joy. It felt nice to contribute to something you could confess to, look back on, and laugh at. 

“Dear Diary,

What a day it’s been! I’ll have to keep it brief since I’m swamped per usual. 

It was a normal day. Early morning rise. Grueling training. Meals with friends. Same old. Same old.

The most notable moment was stumbling upon Captain Levi in the library. It was the first time I have seen him out of uniform and in his (especially tight) casual clothes. I, on the other hand, was in my pajamas. Needless to say, I was blushing for more than one reason…

I somehow managed to pull it together so I could write to the family and study up on key terms.

Will write again ASAP! 

Love, 

(Y/N)”

Thus completed the three tasks you had in mind for the evening. Each night that you managed to get it all done, you couldn’t help but feel proud of yourself. Many of your comrades stuck to one, maybe two tasks. There were even some who did no tasks, their to-do lists completely empty. Meanwhile, you were doing all this, being exceptionally productive. 

// // //

_Where am I?_

You awoke to an intense heat on your right side. Eyes fluttered open to see that you were beside an actual fire. In a panic, you snapped up quickly only to realize you were still in the library and the fire next to you was merely the fireplace. Having sat up so rapidly, your prior headache echoed and drew out a wince. Impulsively clutching your forehead, you took a moment to assess your surroundings. A small quilt was draped upon you. Underneath you, armchair cushions lined up as a makeshift mattress. Your knapsack had been folded into a pillow for your head. Seated in front of you, leaning forward, elbows on knees, hands folded together, your captain. 

His eyes bore into you, “So, you’re up?”

“Umm… yes, sir. Good morning.”

Levi lifted his gaze towards the clock before returning it to you, “It is 1 AM.” 

You couldn’t help but blurt out, “Really?”

“Tch, you really are clueless aren’t you?”

You squinted your eyes thinking, _Clueless about what? I only confused the time…_ “Sorry?”

“(Y/N), you’ve been dozing off in here nearly every other day for the past three weeks. I have been carrying your ass to bed. Nearly every other day. For the past three weeks.” With each pause, he managed to appear more and more intense.

Your mouth hung open. _What!? Did I just hear that correctly?_ “…That can’t be.”

“I always make my rounds at night, and you are always passed out in here. It’s not that I mind carrying you, but it’s time you tell me what’s going on.”

 _Does that mean he put me here? Does that mean he made this bed for me?_ You nervously twiddled your thumbs, “Nothing’s going on…”

Levi folded his arms and tilted his head, clearly not buying it. 

“I mean… I’ve been getting some minor headaches lately, nothing serious though.”

“You’re passing out from minor headaches?” The tone in his voice implied, _“Seriously? You’re that weak?”_

“Well, I guess I haven’t been getting enough sleep lately… I’ve just been too busy” Levi still looked unsatisfied, demanding more information. You continued defending yourself, “I’ve been way busier than anyone else. Tonight I wrote letters, read my textbook, and journaled. ”

Levi scoffed, “Are you losing it?” He reached over to his side table, picked up your diary, and thumbed through it, rapidly revealing blank pages. “Look (Y/N), they’re all empty, all the way back to your graduation from the Cadets.“

“But… but I just wrote this evening!”

“Maybe you dreamt you did.” 

You leaned forward to examine the table you’d been working at. Your textbook was closed and stationary untouched. Along with Levi’s demonstration of your diary, you were starting to feel convinced that all your hard work was only getting done in your sleep, results fruitless in reality. This awakening made your heart sink.

“It’s not about what you can do, but what you should do.” Levi paused. “Sure, you can somehow do twenty things in a few hours, but you have to think… can you manage it?” 

_No… I can’t manage it. I know I can’t manage it._

Levi’s voice was terse. “If you’re constantly tiring yourself out, you won’t be ready when your energy is actually needed. There’s a reason your peers aren’t burning themselves out every night. Think about the nature of our regiment.”

“That’s exactly it!” tears began to well, “I feel like I need to do all I can now because we could die at any moment!” A sob escaped your mouth. Tears flowed down your face. As much as you wanted to, you could not hide this meltdown.

For you having just lashed out at him, he showed no anger, only concern. With a careful speed, he rose from his chair and sat beside you on the cushions. You bit your fingernails trying to stay grounded. Instead, Levi took your hand from your mouth and squeezed it tightly, far more comforting. His grip was tender. His compassionate eye contact further softened the setting.

“Listen…” a typically warning sentiment spoken with absolute kindness, “You, me, every scout knows the reality we live in. When you can accept it, you’ll realize how you truly want to be spending your days.” 

Levi swallowed, “I’ve been seeing you buzz around, and honestly, it even makes me tired.” The bags under his eyes illustrated he wasn’t lying. “But even if not for me, I need you to enjoy yourself.”

A lump in your throat, you couldn’t form any verbal response. The reality that you had been accomplishing nothing for the past month. The reminder that any day could be your last. The realization that Levi cared for you so much. It was all too much to handle at once. Your body began to tremble. Levi wrapped a strong arm around your back steadying you. When you sobbed, he brushed your hair out of your face and brought your head against his neck. An arm around your back, a hand in your hair, it was the warm embrace you didn’t know you needed. You never could have guessed he was capable of demonstrating such care.

You two stayed like this for a moment, neither of you keeping track of exactly how long. You both pulled away simultaneously. His steel soft eyes now level with yours, he stared just long enough to make you think. His caress of your head tightened slightly as he pulled you into a kiss. It was entirely soft and gentle. Your bodies filled with warmth, possibly from the fire, possibly from your feelings. You instinctively gripped his wrist, encouraging his stay.

His teeth grazed your lip and gave a slight tug. His hand clutched your hair as an arm hugged your back. He maintained the kiss as he stood, lifting both of you from the ground. His hands moved along your body until they rested on the sides of your face. 

Levi smoothly drew out from the kiss, “You’re coming with me.” His thumb wiped tears from your cheeks.

“Where are we going?” 

“We’re going to enjoy ourselves for once,” Levi smirked, “I’ll make you realize just how good it feels to do what you really want.“


	5. Bodyguard Levi (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After years of sexual tension, the Reader’s ironed bodyguard cannot stand a second more.

_There was a reason he applied to be your bodyguard. There was a reason you hired him._

An honorary dinner in the capital of Stohess. For such an event, you spent hours on doing your makeup and deciding what to wear. You settled on a deep red lip with a shimmering gown of the same shade. Of course, you were not the guest of honor, no one should even notice, but Levi would. After all these years of serving as your personal bodyguard, he felt he knew everything about you.

There was a reason he applied to be your bodyguard. The idea of chaperoning the rich daughter of a bureaucrat disgusted him, but it was a way out of the underground. He almost backed out of the interview, but when he laid eyes on you, he gave his all to land the job.

There was a reason you hired him. The notorious thug of the underground, though short, would scare a dog off a meat truck. His integrity and interest in you from the interview made him all the more attractive of a candidate.

A knock on the door of your hotel room interrupted your dressing. You opened up to see Levi in an all black suit, hair slightly gelled, shades per usual. His tie matched your outfit per your orders. You liked to remind the world that he belonged to you.

“Are you ready, miss?” In all the time he had spent with you, he never failed to address you formally.

“Good evening. I am almost ready, but I can’t quite button it up.” You rapidly spun, revealing your entirely exposed back.

He had done this for you a million times. He pinched just above your lower back and fastened up to your nape. The dress fit you perfectly.

He pushed back his sleeve and glanced at his watch, the watch you had bought him at Christmas for his birthday, “It’s about time. Shall we?”

You playfully whined, “Oh, Levi? Are you saying you don’t want to spend all night in here with me?” You giggled.

It was exactly what he wanted to do, but your swift departure from the room denied him the chance. He would have to use the ten story elevator ride to the main floor to suppress his imagination.

// // //

As you worked your way through the gala’s crowd, you noticed that most everyone was attached to another. The invitation did allow a plus-one, but you had not expected that every single guest would bring one. You wanted to make an appearance, but not like this.

Before entering the main room, you stood on your tiptoes and pulled on Levi’s shoulder to reach his ear. So as not to reveal your plan to everyone, you whispered softly, “you may just have to act as my special someone tonight.” 

He held back a deep shiver. Just as he had gotten himself grounded, you were begging him to be your date for the night. He managed to accept your request with a slight nod, so slight that only you could see the motion, before hooking your elbows together. You thought, _God, he was smooth._ If only you knew the strain he was placing on himself.

The confidence in his stride was captivating. The clean smell of his fabric softener and hair product tickled your nose. Even through the suit jacket sleeve, you could feel the muscles of his forearm. The walk to your seat felt a little too fast. You recognized your nameplate at a circular table for eight. Your table mates were already seated, tasting hors d'oeuvres and chatting with each of their significant others. Despite the shape of the table, everyone seemed keen to keep to their pairs. Good thing. You and Levi were not ones for small talk, especially not with strangers.

Levi pulled your chair out for you out of respect but dually lust. He could not resist an opportunity to watch you bend into a seat, especially in this tight gown. With this view from behind, he was especially thankful for his shades.

Just before you hit the chair, ass completely stuck out, you turned over your shoulder and grinned, “Thank you, darling.”

Behind his lenses, he squinted his eyes. Behind his closed lips, he clenched his teeth. No one had ever used a pet name on him before. Oh, what were you doing to him?

Without a word, he took a seat at your right, to which you promptly placed your hand on his left knee.

You spoke softly, “Hey, you’re supposed to be my boyfriend, would you take your sunglasses off?”

“But it would compromise-”

“Guess I’ll have to do it myself.” You pinched the bridge of his nose to remove his glasses and folded a temple into the sweetheart of your dress, forcing his attention to your cleavage. He darted his eyes back up to avert his stare. 

The two of you began a polite conversation. Not so polite however was your creeping hand on his thigh. Anytime you asked him a question, you moved an inch up and up causing his dick to do the same. You were toying with him so much and there was nothing he could do about it. Not only were you his boss, but he was helpless in the face of your seduction. The situation in his pants refused another second of inattention. He would have to take care of it. He would not last this whole ceremony with such an erection.

Levi carefully scanned the room. The alcohol had yet to be served. Nobody would be acting out. No one was eyeing you up. There should be no trouble. He determined he could afford to excuse himself for a while. 

Against his better judgment, he indulged in your techniques. He gently clinched your shoulder and whispered into your ear, “I will be back shortly, mistress. Would that be alright?”

Without moving your head, you merely gave a side eye and shrugged, “I suppose, if you must.” You reached to your dip and offered his shades. 

“I’m certain it’s safe. Don’t worry.” Levi pardoned himself from the table and stood, returning his glasses to his face. 

“Oh, Levi?” You reached a hand up and tugged his tie.

His eyes met yours just below his lenses. “Don’t keep me waiting. I might get lonely…” you pouted with puppy eyes and released your grip.

He straightened his tie and hurried off. _God damn._ In all his years of being your bodyguard, nothing had prepared him for such a challenge. He never could have imagined you would be the one making his job difficult. His dick was so hard, he was struggling to walk properly. He could not get all the way to the hotel room with this in his pants. There was only one option. He shouldered the door open and threw himself into a single-stall bathroom.

// // //

Levi slammed and locked the door behind him. He stood himself against the tile wall. Before he could even undo his belt, his dirty mind defiantly wandered to his go-to memories. 

Those times you told him to tie your shoes, he’d kneel on the ground in front of you, inadvertently getting a sneak peek in between your thighs. Sometimes you wore skirts – sometimes with pretty panties, sometimes with no panties.

Those times you pulled him by the collar into fitting rooms, ordering him to help you dress and undress, demanding he check you out and tell you how nice you looked. It happened so many times. He could picture you in any outfit in any lingerie. 

Those times you called for him from the bath, requesting he scrub your back and wash your hair. Each curve of your body glistened in the water as you asked him to reach here or there and voiced pleasure for his service.

He had touched himself to these scenes countless times before. Tonight’s roleplay was standing out, though. It was not only that he had to pretend to be your “special someone”, it was everything about the night. The looks you had given him. The dress you were wearing. The screams you would make if he… It was all he could think about.

“ _Hah…. fuck…._ ” Levi’s back squirmed against the wall. His mouth hung open panting as quietly as he could manage. _For Christ’s sake…_ he hadn’t even reached down there yet, but he was struggling to muffle his noises.

Shaking hands finally whipped out his member. Eyes widened at his own body. No wonder it was difficult to get here. It was the biggest he’d ever been. With the very first stroke, he clutched the metal rail behind him, overwhelmed with sensitivity. As much as it riled him, he needed more. He quickened his pace, squeezing even tighter. His left thumb ran over his leaking slit. His head tilted against the surface behind him. Fingers released the rail and ran through his raven locks. Clenched teeth barred gasps from escaping… for the most part. Some sensations made his jaw drop, releasing shameful moans. At the sound of his own vulnerability, he flushed a deeper shade of red.

You had this clean freak pleasuring himself in a bathroom. 

Just that, when his knees grew weak, he had nowhere to support his lower body. He was desperate enough to use the restroom in this way, desperate enough to anchor himself on this metal rail, but not desperate enough to sit down on any of the surfaces in here.

His precum was so much, it was dripping onto his slacks. Immense pleasure and frustration caused a conflicted groan. If not dealt with quickly, the stark contrast of his white on black would be all but noticeable.

All but noticeable to the guests of this black tie affair whose presence just beyond the door could not be ignored. Usually, he could get more privacy than this. Tonight though, only a thin barrier separated him and a ballroom filled with hundreds of people. It was impossible to imagine you screaming his name with an endless drone of chatter in earshot.

 _Fuck this._ It was not that the current setting was too dire, it was that he had finally snapped. He had been settling for these secret and spontaneous jerk off sessions for far too long, years in fact. He could not stand one more. His hard-on ached for you, demanded you. At this length, it would be a waste to spend it on his hand, he would much rather use it to please you too.

Levi clutched the enamel rims of the sink taking a few deep breaths. He washed his hands until they glimmered. He splashed some cold water on his neck. His reflection in the mirror talked him down. Once he composed himself as best he could, he tucked himself up and made a hasty return for your table. He only had to make it a few more minutes. He only had to make it upstairs. 

// // //

With a startling grip on your shoulder, Levi made his return known. You jumped in your seat and looked up to him.

Levi cleared his throat. “Excuse me, miss. There’s an urgency upstairs which requires your presence.”

At closer examination, his face was tinged red. You had never seen such a deep shade on him before. It must be something serious. There had never been a problem that required your attention before. You cinched with worry. This relationship facade of the gala had to be put on hold. 

His tinted lenses hid dilated pupils. His waistband hid a solid cock. His expression hid the fluster. Having a blank guise was part of his job and he had mastered it at this point.

As the two of you began the trip to your room, he placed a hand on the small of your back and walked like a gentleman. If not so preoccupied, you would have wondered, _How legitimate is this urgency?_

// // //

Levi reached into his breast pocket and pulled out his copy of your hotel key. He unlocked the door and let you in first, following you closely before shutting the door carefully. He had still not turned on the lights behind you. The light from the moon and city were your only illumination. Your eyes adapted to the darkness.

You frantically searched, “Levi, what exactly requires my attention?”

Levi loosened his tie and sighed, “Me.”

As you began to turn towards him, he grazed his fingertips along the sides of your waist. Now that your neck was twisted slightly, he could snarl right into your ear, “You think I haven’t been noticing your attitude tonight, you little slut?” 

“Wha- what did you just call me?” You hushed.

Ignoring you, he continued, “It’s not that I noticed it, I just can’t ignore it!” He exhaled desperately, further losing the ability to control himself. 

You reached your fingers back, squeezed his jaw, and tilted your neck. Though you adored this power you had over him, your cheek could not help but twitch upward. Finally, your years of audacious flirtation were breaking your seemingly unbreakable bodyguard. The fruits of your hard work were unraveling in front of you. It was all you had dreamed of. It was all too good to be true.

 _Time to play with him some more._ You scoffed, “You’re so weak.”

He grit his teeth, “Hmm… yeah?”

“Maybe I should have hired someone stronger.”

It was only sexual tension before, but now you were riling up his anger too. The confusing blend of desire and rage for you intensified his erection. He growled, “Sounds like you have someone in mind…”

You rolled your neck, “Someone who can…” You teased with a fabricated high-pitched moan, “fuck me hard.”

“Someone like me?” His fiery intonation rose.

You shrugged your bare shoulders, “I suppose you might do…”

As you trailed the last syllable, Levi ripped open the back of your dress, breaking each button he had done so carefully earlier, and pulled it to your ankles leaving you in only a thong and stockings. In a flash, you were bent over the bed. You winced in whiplash. He placed a palm between your shoulders, keeping you pinned down as he undid his tie and threw off his shades. Your ears picked up a metallic dangling as he reached into his coat. With a flick of his wrist, handcuffs snapped open and clamped your arms together. In a matter of seconds, he had completely subdued you. _What a professional._

He leaned over you and leveled his voice, “It’s time I give you a taste of your own medicine, brat.” He scraped his teeth along your ear, “make you finally feel how I feel.”

Before you could understand what he meant, he swiftly oriented you on the bed. Pillows comforted your head as your lower body lay against satin sheets. He grabbed your stockings and yanked them off, promptly using them to knot your legs to the bedposts. Completely constrained by his bondage, you helplessly gazed at the foot of the bed. Your worried look was met with dark eyes and the hint of a smirk underneath his bangs. Levi maintained this sadistic stare as he stripped himself down at a tantalizing pace. 

Slowly, he shouldered off his jacket. Slowly, he unfastened his button down. Slowly, he pulled off his tank top. Slowly, he unlooped his belt. Slowly, he took off his pants. All so slowly…

Once down to his black underwear, he teased, “You can look but you can’t touch.” _A reminder or a warning?_ Heat pooled in between your legs. _Shit. What the hell had you gotten yourself into?_

He placed his strong hands on your soft thighs. Just as you had done to him at dinner, he began creeping up and up. This time, though, he continued past your groin and hooked his thumbs under the hip straps of your thong. He paused and made eye contact with you before tugging up, causing the lace to dip in your folds. Though your face scrunched at the friction, he maintained a flat stare.

“Hngh! Levi?” You gasped.

He answered not with words but by freeing your left strap, using his hand to cup your left breast instead. Despite the strength he displayed when he tied you up, his tongue flicked your nipple so gently. 

His right hand resumed up your midsection, digging your panties even further into you. As the string neared its max stretch, he jutted his hand suddenly, causing the thin fabric to riddle your clit. A fiery heat of friction and arousal intensified in your vulva.

With this, his tongue bit down on your nipple briefly, prying your mouth open. His tongue then trailed up your neck and jawline, sucking love marks on the way. His left hand sturdied himself at the side of your head as his right hand played with your tits, drawing more moans from you.

Levi hovered above you, “Oh, you’re so weak…” _A taste of your own medicine alright._

“Levi, it’s- “ a hard pinch of your nipple, “ _ngh…_ it’s not fair!”

He forced an innocently confused expression across his face, “I think this is pretty fair. You tease me for years. I tease you for one night.”

“No it’s, it’s that…” It was a struggle to form coherent thoughts. “I can make you feel good…” You tried to pitch your case, but the vindictiveness in his eyes denied your offer.

“No no. You deserve this,” he dragged his voice, “you worked so long and so hard for this.” He tilted his head condescendingly as his right hand trailed from your chest to your lower region and ripped your panties off. 

As you opened your mouth to negotiate, he silenced you with a mere brush of his lips. In one swift motion, he was between your legs pulling your knees apart.

“All you have to do is let me know when.”

“When what?”

He couldn’t answer, his tongue was already preoccupied with pleasing you. 

Humanity’s strongest was between your legs. His arms snaked around your thighs. His nose angled into your curves. His hair tickled your hips. When you thought the sight couldn’t get any better, he lifted his steel eyes to meet yours, relishing in your vulnerability. The image alone was enough to get you off, but you were also in the actual act. One particular toe-curling lick was sending you.

“Oh fuck! Oh, Levi… I- _I’m…!”_

The moment you arched your back, he abruptly pulled away from you, leaving a string of his saliva between his lips and yours.

You begged breathlessly, “Wha- what are you doing?” 

“What do you mean?” _A fucking tease._

“P-please…. please let me…!” _Touch you. Kiss you. Cum in your mouth._

He refused to indulge you with anything but a smirk. In your haze, you swore you saw a slight chuckle at your pathetic sight. Chest heaving. Hair awry. Nipples perked. His master was finally at his mercy.

Just as the threat of your orgasm vanished, he dove back in, eyes closed, even hungrier than before. His tongue explored places you never knew existed, changing from soft to firm and back again in all the right spots. He began moaning into you, giving new vibrations. 

He mimicked your voice, “Tell me how nice I look in this outfit,” a clear callback to your dressing room demands of him. He reverted to his own deep tone, “with your thighs as earmuffs.”

This dirty talk was pushing you over the edge. Having been denied once already, the waves of your orgasm were once again close to crashing. Your mouth gaped in preparation. 

He pulled back slightly and mumbled into your pussy, “I can’t hear you…”

“Y- you look… _hah- ahh..!”_ You were so fucking close, you couldn’t fathom the words. You just needed a little more. You just needed him a little more. All tied up, you arched your hips as best you could, trying to get the last bit of sensation you needed. 

Instead, he slammed you back down, kneeling up from your aching womanhood, “tsk tsk… impatient little thing.” 

He finally took off his own underwear. Despite having been untouched this whole time, his cock was completely sprung and dripping wet with precum. You bit your lip in thirst. 

In one fell swoop, he draped your knees over his shoulders and sheathed into you. His length hit your slick walls, immediately emitting a gasp from the both of you. 

Merely from entering, his mouth was already forming into an O. Even with the merciless dominance he displayed on you earlier, you couldn’t help but think _how cute…_ As he began pumping into you, he tried to collect himself. He squinted his eyes and grit his teeth, trying to maintain his assertive appearance.

You had thought the view of him eating you out could never be paralleled, but watching his abs flex, pecs heave, face strain as he fucked you was coming close. The symphony of his skin slapping yours, sweet and shameful moans, and exasperated exhales undoubtedly seized the audio aspect.

Having been teased and denied in oral sex, your nerves were sensitive as ever. _Third time’s the charm?_ You writhed against the sheets, panting rapidly. All that denial had been worth it. All the frustration from before had been more than made up for by the heightened pleasure you felt now. You cried and pulsed through the most intense orgasm of your life. _Maybe Levi had been doing you a favor._

Watching you ride your orgasm enticed him closer to his own. Any further attempt at orgasm denial was futile. At this point, he was so sensitive, to deny you would be to deny himself. A short while after entering you, he was already nearing his peak. As much as he wanted it to last, he had waited far too long for this moment.

In the build-up, he had scrunched his face and clenched his teeth. Upon climax, his appearance changed completely. He threw his head back. Eyes fluttered shut. Jaw relaxed. Lips parted as saliva and seductive sounds flowed out his mouth. His muscles flexed as he filled you with hot cum. _Wait. Wait. Wait. Is this the best view?_

He collapsed on top of you. The both of you took a moment to quell your trembling. The air was filled with the smell of sex and the sounds of your breathing. 

After a few seconds, a few minutes, however long, Levi gazed up at you from your chest. Even in this darkness, you could make out a flush on his face. If not for that, the sweat in his hair and look in his eyes evidenced his vulnerability.

Levi swallowed his pride. “Since I’m your date for tonight,” he paused to catch his breath, “am I allowed to stay in your bed?” Already, he had reverted to his subordinate position, asking for your permission.

“As my date, you’re expected to.” You playfully raised an eyebrow.

Relief softened Levi’s face. He brushed your hair out of the way and caressed your head. He tilted your chin upward, hesitated, then kissed your lips lovingly. The sex was beyond amazing, but this kiss was something different.

You two would have to roleplay again soon.


	6. Giving TLC after grief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another horrible expedition. There is only one person who can make Levi himself again.

Levi had never been so relieved to see the gates open up. The expedition had gone horribly. It was not the uncertainty if he would make it back alive, it was the doubt that the nightmare would ever end. With his years of experience in the Scout Regiment, he knew that every venture had the potential to be a shitshow. Today’s expedition, however, had caught him completely off guard. 

It was the first venture outside the walls for the newest batch of recruits. These expeditions were routine. They always served as the final test of the Scout Regiment orientation. It was a trail Erwin had surveyed countless times. Levi’s assignment on these missions was always to provide backup to the rookies. Besides firing a flare here or there, he never had to help out. It was merely a training exercise. The route had always been deemed safe. The titans here were few and far between.

Today, however, the Scouts were met with the densest amount of abnormals they had ever encountered. The trees that usually aided with 3DMG were today hiding spots for clever titans. As soon as the Scouts entered the forest, dozens of giants sprung out from every tree from every direction. The typical titan was not complex enough to sneak attack, but these abnormals understood how to snatch their prey. 

In an instant, Levi had been caught in a 360 degree surround of terror. With screams coming from each direction, he was paralyzed by indecision of which way to turn, who to spend his limited gas, blades, time, energy on saving. In this fleeting moment, young soldiers died in the clutches of titans. They had the life squeezed out of them, bit out of them, crushed out of them. 

Levi managed to snap out of it in time to save the next wave of recruits. In his hasty efforts, he himself caught a fair share of injuries. The lives he rescued and the injuries he sustained were meaningless to him though, his mind preoccupied by his fatal failures.

In a matter of minutes, though it felt much longer, Erwin’s booming and frantic voice ordered a full retreat. The vast majority of the regiment’s new faces had been killed in just one venture, one which was supposed to be easy.

Given his history, both in the underground and in the Scout Regiment, there was not much that could shock him anymore. Living in the underbelly of crime and in the constant threat of titans had sharpened him to his core. This was no secret given his cold exterior. However, watching young hopefuls die on what they were told would be a practice mission would eat anyone up. He was no exception.

Hours after the slaughter, the screams still rang clearly in his ears, so loudly that he could not hear the citizens’ angered rhetoric upon return. Each cry for help, blood-curdling shriek, call of his name gripped his heart with guilt.

But he thought about you. He thought about how much he missed you and how much you were probably missing him. In a trance, he headed home. 

// // //

Outside, a commotion. A dissatisfied rumble of the crowd was audible even through closed windows. When you first started dating Levi, these beratings angered you. He did not deserve this kind of treatment. Now though, having understood how little they got to him, you started to appreciate the uproars as an alert that he was home.

You glanced at the clock. He was not supposed to be back this early. It was still bright outside. This meant one of two things: work went really well or it went really poorly. Today was the first expedition for the newest batch of recruits. You assumed it must have gone well. It was just meant to be practice, after all. 

Even this deep into your relationship, your heart always jumped when his key clicked in the lock. Not only because it meant his safe return, but because it meant you got to see him again. Anytime you were together, you still got those same butterflies you did on day one. Daydreams of the anticipated time with each other ran through your mind. 

But when he opened the door, he did not look like he had the easy day you pictured. His hair was disheveled. His eyes were drooping. His body slumped. After opening the door, he stood in the frame for a few seconds, seemingly in a haze.

Thrown off, you stuttered nervously, “H-Hi, honey. Welcome home.”

He dropped his equipment with a clang and sprung to you, wrapping his arms around you in a tight embrace. His cheek pressed to yours, he felt wet. Sweat? Tears? Both? 

For a moment, you stayed still, completely in shock. He had come home many times, from many disastrous missions, and had never appeared like this. It must have been far worse than you could have ever imagined. When a shaky exhale fell on your ears, you instinctively hugged him back as tight as you could. He trembled in your arms.

“God, Levi? What happened?” You moved one hand to pet the back of his head.

After a deep breath and another shaky exhale, he weakly mumbled, “I’m glad to be home.”

Though he did not explicitly answer your question, you knew all you needed to. It had been a disaster. The complete 180 from your expectations to his reality had you in whiplash, but your feelings were unconsciously buried under concern for him. He must have been shaken all the more. This heap in your arms, you wanted to do all you could for him.

Your eyes gave a frantic up and down. No visible cuts or wounds, his physical state seemed okay. _His mental state?_

You could not help but be blunt, “Are you okay?” 

He muttered into your neck, “I… I’m hungry.”

His straightforward answer caught you off guard. Equally straightforward, “Should I make you some food?”

He simply nodded against your shoulder. You pulled him from you gently, just enough to give him a kiss on the forehead. It did not emit a smile, but it seemed to sliver some sadness away. 

In mutual understanding, you headed towards the kitchen as he made for the closet.

You had been secretly saving some meat for a special occasion, but you decided to cook it early. Considering his state, it was certainly appropriate. It would be a nice surprise and might nudge him back towards his old self. 

_Time to get to work._

// // //

Taking one last look at your spread, you deemed it perfect. Steak, vegetables, potatoes, bread and butter. The meal practically emptied out the kitchen, but it would be worth it. 

Levi had changed into his cotton grey long sleeve and black jeans when you knocked on the closet door. Still on edge, he startled a little before opening up. 

You bit your lip, trying to hide any hint of what was in store, “It’s ready.” 

Levi could read you like a book. Your excitement, your fidgeting, he knew you were trying to conceal something special. No matter what it was, he appreciated the kindness you had done for him. 

You offered a hand to hold before walking to the kitchen. He intertwined your fingers together. His palm was uncharacteristically cold and clammy.

Just before the table was in eyesight, you lifted your free hand to block his view. 

Three steps away. “Three.”

Two steps away. “Two.”

One step away. “One!”

You pulled your hand away, revealing the hearty potluck.

His eyes widened and mouth gaped. He gave you a surprised look, “You’re too sweet…”

“It’s nothing, really,” you patted his back, “just eat.”

He did not need to be told twice. Even as he was taking his seat, he started grabbing food with both hands. Levi was not the one to scarf down at the table, but he was shoveling food into his mouth whether he was aware or not. When he was down, he usually could not get himself to eat which only worsened his mood. Tonight though, he had such a big appetite. It was adorable. Watching him eat his fill, your soul was filled as well. Anything you could do to help made the both of you feel better.

The evidence was obvious but you prodded, “Do you like it?”

Without looking up from his plate, he nodded vigorously. The steak was cooked perfectly. The potatoes were just the right texture. The vegetable blend complimented. The bread was lightly toasted and butter barely melted. He knew that cooking was an endeavor, but to cook this comprehensively took more than just effort. You cared for him. He knew that. This was only further proof.

It was heartwarming to watch him eat and see his spirits lift. You had never seen him so excited to eat before. Distracted, you had completely disregarded your own plate.

Levi snapped out of his cravings for a second. The meal was so delicious, he had forgotten there was another person he was supposed to be sharing it with. He swiftly swallowed down his bite before asking, “Sorry, am I eating too much?” 

You shook your head and waved your hands rapidly, “No no no! Go ahead! Please have as much as you want. Don’t worry about me.”

He blushed pink, embarrassed at his portions, not quite convinced that you didn’t mind. You buttered a roll for yourself and smiled, “I’m just glad to see you’re enjoying it.”

He met your eyes through his messy bangs, “It’s… it’s perfect. It’s the best meal I’ve ever had.”

The compliment was especially meaningful. You were not much of a cook and Levi was one to impress. With this, your face matched his pink shade. The two of you mutually admired the cuteness in each other. 

As you munched your meal, you snuck glimpses of him. He had made a diligent return to eating, but the meal would be over soon. _What to do after this? How can I keep this going?_

The more you examined, the more you noticed in his appearance. Though he had changed out of the uniform and into clean clothes, he still showed signs of battle. His hair was tangled. His skin was smudged. His face was sapped.

_That’s it!_

There was not much Levi despised more than being dirty. There was not much Levi loved more than being bathed.

You let him take his time savoring the meal. As the table emptied, you reached a tender hand to his face and wiped some dirt with your thumb. At your touch, he could not help but twitch in surprise, still skittish from the day’s prior incident. He gave you a nervous glance. 

You felt awful for startling him. Cautiously, you moved your hand to his. You perked your voice, “Would you like me to start the bath?”

Levi merely nodded in affirmation. A lump in his throat, he did not want a voice crack to slip. He loved all you were doing for him, but he also did not want you to feel it was an obligation, or worse, have his sadness bring you down as well.

Dishes in hand, you rose from the table and placed them in the sink. Before heading to the bathroom, you brushed his bangs aside and kissed his forehead. “It will be ready when you are.”

The trauma he felt earlier blended with the gratitude he felt now. The polarized combination caused tears to form. He managed to hide them until you left for the bath. Levi wiped his eyes with the cloth napkin you had set out. It smelled so clean. Your complete attention to detail, the effort you put in little things, did him in and caused a couple of tears to flow. He clutched the napkin and whispered to himself, “She is too amazing.”

// // //

All finished and stomach satisfied, Levi tidied the table and made for the bathroom. He expected that you had drawn the water for him, maybe even used bubble bath. He had not expected to see you perched on the countertop, legs crossed at the ankles, patiently awaiting his arrival.

Flattered, Levi leaned against the doorframe, “Did I keep you waiting?”

You gently lowered yourself down to the ground and teased, “Oh, not too long…” You looped your arms around his neck, “Enjoy your dinner?”

He brushed your hair behind your ear, “Very much so.” 

You sensed you were inching closer and closer to coercing a smile out of him. 

“Thank you…It helped-” Recalling all your kind acts, his voice was on the verge of breaking, “It meant a lot.”

You giggled, “Oh Levi, I’ve barely gotten started.”

You pulled him into a brief hug and slipped your fingers under his cotton long sleeve. He willingly lifted his arms above his head, allowing you to pull the shirt up and off. Next, his pants. You hooked the waistbands of both his jeans and underwear and slid them down to his ankles, helping him step out easily. 

In a different setting, you both would have taken more time to admire the views. You on your knees. Him completely undressed. However, the erotic nature was at the back of both of your minds. Your desire to wash him clean and his desire to wash away stress buried any sign of sensuality. 

He splashed the water to test. Your hands on the valves, “Too hot? Too cold?”

“Just right.” Levi held you for support as he stepped into the bathtub. 

He leaned his head back over the edge and closed his eyes. Arms rested on the rims as his chest sunk deeper into the water. A barely audible “ahh” escaped as his muscles soothed and skin warmed. At face value, Levi in a steaming bath was objectively seductive. But with this light sigh of relief, you could only think _how adorable…_

You knelt on the bathmat and lathered soap in your hands, preparing to clean him. As you reached for his neck, he turned over his shoulder, “Oh, you aren’t going to get in with me?” 

You could not quite make out his tone. Was he trying to entice you or was he genuinely pleading? Either way, you decided to join in, out of wanting to tend to him but also your own longings.

Levi peeked an eye as you began to undress. You maintained a loving glance as you stripped yourself down, accepting his stare. You knew that unveiling each curve of your skin would only uplift him. It was a cute cycle. He liked watching you. You liked that he watched you. As you bent down to tidy the clothes, a blush began to creep across his face. When you stood from the folded pile, he snapped out of a daydream. As you had done for him, he held out his hand for balance as you stepped into the opposite side.

Now facing him, you offered, “What should we clean first?”

He tilted his head down, flattered by your consideration, and stuck his arms out to you, “Arms, please?”

“You got it.” You grabbed his wrist and began scrubbing. 

He returned his head back to leaning over the edge. Muscles glimmered as you doused them in soapy water. His eyes closed, you examined his skin for clues about the day. A few small cuts. Some noteworthy bruises. He usually came home unharmed. If even he had suffered injuries, you could only imagine what had happened to the fresh batch of recruits.

As you worked from forearm to bicep, you noticed a swirl of crimson dye the water. Blood? You rotated his arm to see his tricep. A long gash stretched from shoulder to elbow. Your mouth gaped, but you held back any gasps, trying not to frighten him. It must have looked worse than it felt. Even as it bled, Levi did not seem to notice. His facial features were completely relaxed.

You stumbled, “H-Hey… Levi?”

“Mmm?”

“How are you…umm…” The more you stared, the more nervous you felt, “How does it feel?”

“Ah?” Levi could sense the worry in your voice. He opened his eyes to see you paling at the scrape. 

The fright on your face. The lump in your throat. It was touching to see how deeply you cared for him and his well-being. Still, he did not want you to work yourself up with worry.

Levi placed an affirming hand on your bare shoulder, “It doesn’t hurt, really.”

You met his eyes with concern, “Do you want me to keep going?”

The calm in his eyes encouraged you. Considering all he had probably seen today, you could withstand this bit of blood for him.

As you returned to washing him, Levi’s eyes fluttered shut. Apart from the injuries, he was in absolute bliss. A happy belly. A clean body. All thanks to his loving other half. He peeked an eye open and watched you scrub. Your concentration humored him. Your compassion moved him. The urge to both chuckle and sob manifested in a conflicted whimper. What you brushed off as a sigh of comfort was actually an uncontainable outpour of his feelings for you.

Once you were done with his arms, you moved to his chest. It was only now that you noticed another gash, just below and parallel to his clavicle. Thankfully, this one was not bleeding. Still, you decided to avoid that area, making a mental note to remember it for later. 

Right as you finished his upper body, Levi knew to spin himself around. A dark bruise on his shoulder. Another cut near his ribs. You could not recall a time he had ever been hurt this bad. 

Now that his back was to you, he allowed himself a wince as you glossed over the wounds. He did not want you to know he was in pain, not only because he wanted the bath to continue, but also because he could sense your unease. While he relished in your caretaking, the consideration in his heart never wavered. He wanted you to feel okay as well. 

Your mentality in mind, he accepted what was coming next. Washing his feet always made the both of you laugh. You knew he hated being tickled, but his uncontrollable giggling was contagious. 

However, as much joy as it brought you, you did not want to coerce him into letting you do it, especially since he was having a bad day. You bit your lip to hide your excitement. “Levi, should we…?” 

Levi teased knowingly, “Should we what?”

“Do you want me to clean your…?” You pointed to the water.

“Well…” Levi rolled his eyes playfully. “They’re not going to clean themselves…” With all the pampering you had given him, amusing you was the least he could do.

You grinned with delight as you grabbed the middle of his shin. It was more manageable for him if you could start above and slowly work your way down. On any other night, you would elongate the process. But tonight, you would try your best to make it smooth and painless for him. 

However, having barely gotten to his ankle, Levi had already thrown his elbow over his eyes, trying to ground himself. It was your little secret that Captain Levi was completely helpless to tickling. One of the countless and adorable perks of dating him.

Quickly, you rounded the sponge about his ankle, twitching his lips into a smile. Even faster, you swiped the top of the foot, causing him to clutch his side. Finally, the base of his foot drew out the laugh you had waited so long to hear. Sure, it was cheaply earned, but it was music to your ears nonetheless. 

As his deep voice peaked in laughter, the memory of his depressed state was subconsciously erased from your mind. In all his hot mess of wet hair, squinted eyes, breathless giggling, your heart swelled at the sight. You wondered if he knew what he was doing to you or if he was too lost in sensation to form any thoughts. This version of Levi in front of you, his laughter was indeed infectious.

Without the ability to breathe or think, he resorted to splashing you, trying to indicate he had reached his limit. The energy bundled inside you insisted on splashing him back. Suds, splashes, and snickers filled the air as you engaged in a brief and childish bath fight, pushing water towards the other as bubbles overflowed from the tub. The two of you were both neat freaks who would not normally allow foam on the floor, but emotions ran so high that you could only notice each other. Even just beyond the rims of the porcelain, the rest of the world was out of sight and out of mind.

Through the sting of soap, Levi opened his eyes to take you in. He loved the way your hair shined. He loved the goofy grin you got. He loved the upside down “v”s your eyes made in joy. He loved everything about you, not just your exterior, but especially what was inside. You were a selfless, loving, perfect individual who always knew what TLC he needed and when to administer it.

And you did the same. His jet black hair, laced with white bubbles, slicked to his face. His reluctance to smile made each one all the more special. His steel grey eyes were known to intimidate, but you only knew them to fascinate. You loved everything about him, not just his image, but especially his interior. He was a thoughtful, caring, flawless individual who always managed to delight you even when he himself had been broken.

The tub now half-full, you shook hands in an armistice. Your gaze rose from your handshake to his tricep. No matter how hard he tried to hide it, you could tell that the cut was causing some pain.

You took on a militant tone, “Now that the war’s over, I would like to make a peace offering with an administration of first aid.” A double meaning in war, regarding both his expedition and your bubble fight.

Levi chuckled at your acting skills, “The delegation would be happy to accept. In fact, it would like to extend an olive branch of cuddling to follow.” 

One more squeeze of acceptance before the handshake was broken. The next steps of pampering had been laid out and agreed upon. You rose from the tub to grab hot and fresh towels for the both of you.

// // //

With a towel around his waist, Levi sat himself on the foot of the bed. You had grabbed the first aid kit as well as his favorite pair of sweatpants. You knelt in front of him with the pants bundled around the ankles, allowing him to slide his legs in easily. Levi tilted his head to you and smiled.

Now for the hard part. First, the bruises. Cuts later.

You attached a bag of ice to his back, “Could you keep this here?” He placed a hand atop yours to trade holds. 

As you prepared the alcohol pad, Levi clutched your free hand. It was a kindness you always offered. He would squeeze your hand whenever and however hard he needed to. He never allowed others to see him in pain, and he would certainly not rely on them, but he knew he could be vulnerable with you.

Levi took a sharp inhale as you swabbed his arm. You both knew it was a necessity, but these cleanings never got easier for either of you no matter how many times you had gone through them. You glanced up from the wound to his face. His eyes were squinted. His neck shuddered. His teeth were clenched. He suppressed his swears, trying not to worry you. You were convinced it hurt you more than it hurt him, and you told him exactly that.

“I’m so sorry, honey. This hurts me more than it hurts you.”

Levi opened watering eyes and attempted to smile, “It’s alright…” He winced. “I’m alright. My bruise is-” Another sharp inhale. “-is feeling better.” He tried to perk his voice for you.

You swiftly removed the alcohol from his arm. Now that the wound had been cleaned, you could wrap it in gauze and move on. One down. Two to go.

Next, his back. You rose from the floor and sat behind him on the bed. Levi could not help but cringe at the smell of alcohol. It always preceded the pain like a lightning strike to thunder. When his body twitched at the sting, you swore you could feel it too. He squeezed your hand tightly.

You massaged his neck, “Almost done, sweetheart. Just one more.”

Levi exhaled, “And then cuddles?”

“And then cuddles!” You cheered.

Finally, you reproached his front to bandage his chest. One last swipe of alcohol drew a series of pants. He held his head in his hand. A heart-wrenching sob slipped out, but at last, it was over.

Even as you removed the swab and dressed his wound, he continued to whimper. _Shit. Everything should feel numb by now. What did I miss?_

You frantically scanned his body. “I’m so sorry, Levi. Did I miss something? Where does it hurt?” 

Levi wiped his eyes with his wrist and shook his head. “No, no. It’s just… nguhh …it’s just-” 

You looked down to him. He was rubbing his forehead. Tears were flowing. His dark hair bobbed as he choked. It killed you to see him like this. You yourself felt like crying. 

But when he looked up to you, his eyes were happy. In fact, he was smiling. 

He stumbled, “I’m just… so lucky… to come home to you.”

He was overwhelmed, not with pain, but with love for you. 

Your jaw dropped briefly, just until he pulled you into a passionate kiss. Hand in your hair. Arm around your waist. He kissed and kissed and kissed you. The taste of salt lingering from his tears made it all the more intimate. His hand explored you, caressing your head and brushing your cheek, before settling on the back of your neck. 

He held you just right. Tightly enough and in all the right places. Muscles flexed as he effortlessly pulled you on the bed with him, maintaining the kiss throughout. The exertion from the movement caused him to moan into your mouth, sending chills down your spine.

He was pulling you on top of him, seemingly forgetting his injuries. You released from the kiss, “W-wait, Levi, are you sure you’re okay?”

He tugged you closer to his body, “I am now.” 

The two of you backed further into the bed until his head flopped onto a pillow. The clumsiness drew nervous giggles from the both of you.

Levi was dressed in only sweatpants and bandages. His face was tear-streaked. He was supporting all of your weight. Yet, he was on cloud nine. The tough day had been long-forgotten. He could only see you, draped atop him, glowing in the sunset. He rubbed his eyes with his elbow, trying to shake the idea that you were an angel. After some contemplation, he had to admit that you were.

You stared in each other’s eyes for a few moments, mutually admiring, before returning back to a kiss. He continued to play with your hair. His other hand landed softly beside your neck. His chest beat against yours as he dragged his legs along your body. 

You had tended to him hand and foot, he felt it was time to do the same.

Levi flipped your positions by rolling you over and nudging your back to the bed. One hand propped beside your head, the other caressed your cheek. 

He hovered over you and smirked, “With all you’ve done for me, I would love to make things even.”


	7. Receiving TLC after grief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one who is always comforting others finds themselves alone in their time of need. Levi can’t bear to see it, so he takes them into his own hands.

You sat with your usual group, but one was missing. It was the one who was always by your side, but never would be again. 

Though your sadness was obvious, your friends did not know the best way to help you through your loss. Sit in silence? Talk about it? Go off topic? You were always the one comforting others, such that when your time of need came, no one knew how to help you. 

The first few moments of dinner were quiet as your friends tried to read you. When silence did not seem to help, they transitioned to mindless chatter and small talk. Neither of which you participated in. In fact, you did not even notice their efforts at all. You merely stared at your tray, their chatter drowned out by your endless train of thoughts.

The meal seemed to drag yet also seemed ablur. Your friends had eaten their meals, dwindled a while, and assumed you wanted some space. A few of them pat your back, a few of them whispered “sorry”, before leaving you alone as they made for their bunks.

You stayed in the cafeteria, cold tray of untouched food in front of you. You thought about heading to your room as well but decided against it. Even though your mind was clouded, the consideration in your heart never wavered. You recognized the discomfort your roommates might feel with your presence tonight. As much as you cherished being around them, you would only be a downer. As long as you could, you would stay in the cafeteria, not only for their sake, but yours as well. You told yourself you wanted to be alone, but did you really?

It all seemed so strange, that you had wiped the tears of countless comrades but were left alone in your time of need. Surely, someone could do something.

// // //

Levi entered the mess hall a few hours after dinner had ended. Cleaning up after meals was a rotating assignment, but he still snuck in for the finishing touches at the end of each night. He was an insomniac neat-freak who indulged in making things spotless. Following his paperwork, late-night cleaning sessions had become his nightly routine.

The cafeteria was always empty at these hours. This was part of the reason he startled at the sight of you still here. You were all alone, and even with your back towards him, he could tell you were in a certain state. The girl who was normally palling around with everyone was instead sitting in solitude.

He had been wanting to approach you for a while now. Your merit had not gone unnoticed by him. You were an excellent soldier on and off the battlefield. You had a good amount of titan kills under your belt and whenever things got rough, you stayed strong for others. In this way, Levi sensed you were similar people. He thought he ought to get to know you more. 

The two of you alone in here now, it seemed that fate had deemed this the time.

Levi proceeded with wiping the tables, silently hoping you would acknowledge him first. However, stuck in your haze, you had not even heard his footsteps and thus had not noticed his presence. After a minute of staring and not even a turn of your head, he reverted his gaze to the chores. It seemed you needed some alone time.

You displayed no interest in conversing. There was so much to clean. Still, Levi could not keep his eyes off of you. He was never one to slack off, but with you at the forefront of his mind, he was cleaning at a fraction of the speed that he usually did. Each table he moved to gave him a new angle, new view, and new clue to your state.

Three tables away. Your head was tilted down.

Two tables away. You were completely still.

One table away. Your uniform was dirty.

Now at your table, he noticed your tray was still full of food. It had been hours since the meal. The food was cold, you did not seem interested in it. 

Levi held his hand out, motioning for the tray, “I’ll take this.”

Only now did you first notice he was here at all. You froze at his sudden presence. What is he doing here? You quickly noticed that he was in his cleaning outfit, white cloth over his hair and face. A rag draped over his shoulder. He held a soapy bucket in one hand and reached for your tray with the other. As he made for the sink, you mouthed a silent, “thanks.”

You brought your hands to your forehead in frustration, shading your eyes. _God, of all people…_ Captain Levi had to be the one to see you like this? He was only the one person you had been trying to impress throughout all your time here. Finally, he notices you, and it has to be during your time of weakness? 

It was all too much. Losing your best friend, your family. The awkward dinner with friends. No one able to help you. Captain Levi seeing you like this. The pent up frustration of the evening came out through tears. No matter how much you wanted to, the meltdown could not be delayed a second longer. You bit your sleeve to silence your sobs.

You tried to ignore he was here at all, but the sound of running water and your curious glances to him served as constant reminders. You began to feel self-conscious, remembering your soiled uniform, tangled hair, lonely sight. Even though you were biting your sleeve, your whimpers could not be contained.

Now that he was past your table, back towards you as he faced the sink, Levi could no longer take peeks from his work to you. His staring back would be too visible. He tried to appear as his stern self, attempting to hide the fact that you were at all distracting him. He continued to scrub and endeavored to ignore you. The best in the regiment, he could hyper focus on one task while staying alert of his surroundings. This trait translated from the battlefield to the barracks. He cleaned vehemently while picking up hints of your voice.

Sniffles and whimpers became louder and more frequent. Even with the visual and auditory clues he had picked up, he was taken aback at your crying. As someone who was constantly the support system for others, he never imagined you were capable of breaking down.

As he washed, he wondered, _What could she be upset about? What could make her cry?_

Levi thought over the day thus far. He had laid eyes on you both before and after the day’s expedition. You set out with the comrade you always did, but did not come back with them. _Maybe that was it?_ You had lost many before, though. _What was it about them?_

He thought over the field report he had reviewed just prior to coming here. The amount of losses was typical. Levi parsed over the names he had read and realized: you shared a last name with one of the fallen. It was not just any comrade, it was a member of your family. His throat tightened with sympathy.

He was not the one to console others through grief. In fact, he had little to no experience with it. But listening to you weep, alone and struggling through your loss, he could not bear one more second of it. 

Like your comrades, he did not know how to best handle the situation. Unlike your comrades, he cared for you especially and would spend however long it took to help you through this.

He hastily set your dish on the rack, wiped his hands dry, and made for your table. As his footsteps grew closer, your heart beat faster. You contemplated running away but felt stuck to your seat. Without a word, he took a seat across from you and folded his hands on the table.

Levi cleared his throat, “What are you doing here?”

Despite his sincerity, your ears only picked up the flatness in his voice. He must have been ordering you to leave.

“I’m sorry, Captain.” You sniffled, “I’ll be going.” 

You began to stand before Levi placed his hand atop yours. You startled at his touch. 

Levi stammered, “N-No. I just mean… why are you still in here?” He glanced at the clock, “Dinner ended over two hours ago.”

You attempted to be casual, “Oh, really? It’s been that long? I really should be heading back, huh?” 

“Hey. Come on. I mean it.” Levi’s voice was serious yet sincere. “Don’t pretend I can’t tell. It’s written all over your face.” 

He had a point. Your face was tear-streaked. Your cheeks were flushed. Your eyes were reddened. There was nothing you could do to hide it. You choked on an embarrassed sob.

Levi hated seeing you like this. The fact that the world could treat someone so nice so harshly, it angered him actually. However, he knew that he had to bury any sign of resentment. He had to appear completely sound for your sake. 

He brought his hands to the back of his neck, untying the cloth from around his face and gesturing it towards you. When you froze, he reached over the table and dabbed the tears from your eyes, causing a shudder.

His entire face now revealed, you discovered that his cheeks were also pink. His typical scowl was gone, replaced with simple kindness and genuine concern. His features softened, your angst began to soften as well.

“Thank you, sir.” 

“Levi is fine.” He tilted his head.

You swallowed, “Thank you, Levi.”

Levi nodded and carefully watched as you used his fabric, trying to learn more about your condition. You dried your eyes. You would not have been so bold as to blow your nose had you thought twice, but you were overcome with stuffiness. The disregard for germs, his material, the noise, it was overwhelmingly cute. Combined with a tiny stomach rumble, Levi nearly chuckled at your adorableness, but he could not manage it in the face of your distress.

Even though he had sat with you, held your hand, offered you his handkerchief, your tears continued to flow. Your frown had not let up for even a second. He had to commend you, _how does she do this so often so effortlessly?_

He had to try something else. After all, no one could heal in a dark and empty cafeteria.

Levi stood from the table and held his hand out to you, “Come with me.”

A moment of hesitation, but what did you have to lose? Anything to escape the loneliness you felt. You raised a shaky hand which he gripped tightly. The gentlest of tugs encouraged you up from your seat and towards him. 

Fingers interlaced. His hands were still damp from washing your dishes. A reminder of his thoughtfulness. You did not know where he was taking you, but you did not care. It was only your first interaction, but you already trusted him. Following him blindly felt more than fine, it felt right.

As you left the cafeteria, Levi thought over a plan for the night ahead. The rest of the cleaning could wait. Something far more important had come up which required his attention.

// // //

Eyes blurry with tears, it was hard to tell where Levi was taking you. It was still the barracks, but these halls were unrecognizable. It was all the same hardwood, but you were sure you had never been around here before.

After the silent walk, Levi paused at a door and reached in his pocket for a key. _His room?_

His key in the lock, Levi turned back to you, “Alright, before you touch anything, would you mind taking your shoes off at the doormat?”

 _Uncontaminated at work and at home,_ “Of course.”

He opened the door to his suite. You never knew that the officers had such nice places. Of course the higher ranks had their perks, but this was borderline lavish, especially with how tidy he kept it. A kitchen, living area, bathroom, bedroom, even a walk-in closet, all to himself. Tonight though, it would be for the both of you.

As you slipped off your shoes, Levi crossed his arms in front of you. “Why don’t you take a shower?”

 _Do I smell bad?_ Your face cringed, at which Levi hurriedly continued, “My shower is much nicer than those filthy communal ones.”

“Yeah, umm, okay, sure.” A shower did sound nice.

Levi motioned his head, pointing you in the direction of his bathroom. “I’ll be there in a few minutes with a towel and a change of clothes. Don’t be startled. Leave your clothes on the bathroom counter and I will wash them for you while you shower. Is that okay?”

“Yeah, of course.” It was his place after all, and with all he was doing for you, you knew he had no ill intentions. 

“That’s-” A lump in your throat. “-That’s very sweet of you.”

 _Oh no_. He did not want to see you cry again. “Please. It’s nothing. Just try to enjoy it, okay?” 

You nodded and made for his bathroom. With you now out of sight, he rubbed his forehead, placed a hand on his hip, and tapped his foot. He had no idea what he was doing or what he was getting himself into, but he knew he was doing the right thing, or at least trying to.

Levi had his own self-care routine after rough days: hot shower, clean pajamas, warm meal, straight to bed. Maybe it was not for everyone, but he did not know what was for everyone. His own experience with grief was his only experience with grief. It was the best he had to go off of. He could only cross his fingers and hope it would work for you too.

Levi warmed his oven. Dinner would cook while he did the rest. He took a deep breath. Slaying titans was hard, no doubt, but this was a whole nother type of task, one he found arguably more trying. 

He realized, he would not be doing this for just anyone, certainly not anyone he just met, but there was something that drew him to you. More than anything, he wanted you to feel better, and he wanted to be the one to get you there.

// // //

In your time together, you had not yet snapped out of your haze. On any regular day, you could not handle the thought of a night alone with Levi. Tonight though, you were in such desperate need of someone’s care and attention, it did not phase you even if it came from your superior.

As ordered, you took off your clothes and set them on Levi’s bathroom counter. The dirt and mud smudged his pristine countertops. Hopefully he would not berate you for it, but with how gentle he had been throughout the night thus far, you could not imagine he would get too mad. 

You turned the water on, but the temperature was near freezing. These dials were not like the ones in the communal showers you were used to. _Shit. How do these work?_ For a solid few minutes, every twist combination you tried seemed to result in the same ice-cold water. 

Just as you bent forward for a closer look at the knobs, Levi opened the bathroom door, a clean towel and his spare pajamas in hand. With the sound of water flow, he had expected you to be in the shower by now. He had not expected you to be completely naked, not yet in the shower, bent over at the waist in front of him. 

You turned your head over your shoulder to see a bright red Levi. His name caught in your throat as he slammed the door back shut.

On the other side of the door, he was already sweating. “I’m so sorry! I heard the water running, I assumed you were… I’m sorry!” He was absolutely mortified. _Guess it’s time to move out._

With how the day had gone, this accident was the least of your concerns. Maybe you would fret over it later, but for now, you just wanted to feel the hot water on your skin.

“Levi?” You called from the bathroom, “Could you help me?”

“C-can I..?” Levi coughed, “Are you sure you want me to come in?”

The thought of humanity’s strongest so flustered at the sight of you drew an audible snicker. You felt silly and admittedly a little flattered.

You grabbed a hand towel and held it to your body, barely covering the important bits, “Yeah, It’s fine. I could just use some help with the temperature.”

Levi opened the door ever so carefully. The crease of his hand was around his forehead, simultaneously being polite while also shading his own view. With his haste and blocked vision, he nearly ran into you on his way to the shower.

He cursed at himself and his clumsiness. God, he was flustered. 

You bit your lip, but a chuckle escaped. He whipped his head from the knobs to you, planning to give a glare, but when he saw you giggling, he could not help but smirk. Seeing you feel some joy, even if at his expense, was worlds better than seeing you sad.

Levi splashed his hand under the water. “How’s this? Too hot? Too cold?”

You dipped your foot in. “All better now, thank you. I’m sorry…”

“No ‘sorry’s allowed.” Levi stood from the handles, “I’ll be over here at the sink if you have any other emergencies.” A hint of jokingness in the last word.

He grabbed your dirty clothes from the counter and threw them in his utility sink. After rolling up his sleeves, he turned on the hot water and began doing your laundry.

Before stepping in the shower, you took a moment to take him in. His forearms flexed as he scrubbed the dirt off your clothes. His hair was smoothed back by a knotted cloth over his head. A blush from the incident started to fade. He seemed hyper-focused on your well-being. You had heard so many rumors about Levi, that he was a cold, terse, staunch individual, but this Levi in front of you now was opposite in seemingly every way. You blushed at his hospitality as you threw back the shower curtain.

The first thing you noticed was the sparkly white tile, so much nicer than the dark locker rooms. The second thing you noticed was that Levi’s soap smelled amazing. _Is this what he smells like?_ You had never been close enough to find out.

As you bathed, Levi continued washing your uniform. He searched it carefully for clues about your day. Titan blood evaporated, it did not stain. This blood on your jacket, you must have witnessed something up close and personal. The thought of you witnessing tragedy, or getting hurt yourself, made him scrub even harder. It was a cruel world, but how could it be so cruel to someone like you?

The steam from the hot water was helping both your mental and physical state. The memory of the tragic day was slowly moving to the back of your mind. Dirt washed off your body. Congestion cleared. Your throat soothed. You turned off the water and wrapped his towel above your chest. It smelled nice too. _Maybe this is what he smells like?_

You stepped out of the shower. It had brought you a bit closer to your old self, allowing you to realize how intimate the setting truly was. You and Levi faced each other, both soaking wet. His forearms, your body, glistened in soapy water. You were dressed in one of his towels. His starch white button-down was soaked through and clinging to his body, leaving little to the imagination of the figure underneath. A dash of angst lingered in his eyes, still not over how something could hurt you like this, and contrasted with the pink blush across his face.

Visible chills trickled down your body. It was not easy to get turned on after a rough day, but damn you were feeling close.

The daydreaming was interrupted by a low grumble of your stomach, making your face burn even more.

Levi smirked, “Someone’s hungry.”

You brushed a strand of wet hair behind your ear. Muscles flexed as he wrung out the water from your clothes.

“Get dressed.” Levi flicked his bangs toward a neat pile of clothes. “Meet me at the kitchen table when you’re ready.” Levi threw your uniform over the shower rod and closed the door on his way out.

You steadied yourself against his bathroom counter, trying to compose yourself. You threw your head back and sighed. _A hell of a first introduction…_

// // //

Levi was looking out the window when he heard your footsteps nearing. He was lit by the candlelight of the table and the orange glow from outside.

He had changed into a pair of his own pajamas. He realized, they looked very different on you compared to how they did on him. The sight of you in his clothes was captivating. Simply a plain white tee and pinstriped boxers, but basked in the sunset, you looked like an angel. Levi shifted in his seat.

He had set the table for the two of you. Baked potatoes, sauteéd vegetables, black tea. An exceptionally thoughtful meal, not only because he was sharing his expensive tea leaves, but also because the meal would be nice on your unsettled stomach. It was hard to work up an appetite when you felt sad, but this meal was light enough that you could manage.

Levi folded a napkin across his lap, “Take a seat. Have as much as you want, but don’t feel like you have to.”

“Thank you, Levi. This is really sweet.”

Levi instinctively knit his eyebrows. He could not recall having ever been called “sweet” before. He secretly relished in the typical compliments regarding his strength or good looks, but “sweet” was making him feel something else entirely, something special.

Maybe it was the care and attention he put into the meal. Maybe it was the fact that you had not eaten in hours. Maybe it was the complete infatuation you were developing for him. Maybe all of the above, you felt this was the best dinner you had ever had.

Between bites, the two of you engaged in small talk.

// // //

Neither of you knew how long you had been talking, but you did know it had gone from twilight to a starry night outside.

You learned so many little things about him: why he held his teacups that way, how he cut his own hair, how he became so obsessed with cleanliness. 

He learned so many little things about you: where you grew up, why you joined the Scouts, your favorite little indulgences. He made a mental note that you loved baked goods. He would have to stock up his next time in town. 

Maybe he was the quiet type, though he insisted he was always talkative, but you realized he always had a lot on his mind. He had known Erwin, Hange, other Scouts for years, but with how he talked about them, you knew it was more than just simple interactions. He knew everything about them front to back, and even if he never told them straight up, he did care about them. He cared a lot.

Maybe you were the selfless type, though you insisted you took care of yourself, but he realized that you needed to be looked after too. With how you talked about your comrades, he knew you felt more than just surface-level kindness. You knew everything about everyone front to back, and even if they did not reciprocate it, you did care about them. You cared a lot.

The conversation was fascinating, and you were enjoying it thoroughly, but Levi could tell that you were growing sleepy. You truly felt you could talk all night and never get bored, but you could not talk all night without your eyes getting heavy.

“Hey,” Levi blew out the candle. “Let’s get you to bed, huh?”

You balled your fists and rubbed your eyes, “No I’m-” A yawn. “I’m fine! I’m awake…”

 _Goddamn, she’s adorable._ Levi chuckled, “We can talk tomorrow, okay?”

“Deal.”

Levi rose from his chair and walked behind yours, pulling it out slightly with you still seated. He held his hand out for you, like he had in the cafeteria before, and tugged you up. An arm around your shoulders, a hand in yours, Levi carried you to his bedroom. 

// // //

Levi gently set you on his bed. Pristine, white, cotton sheets. A thick comforter. Plenty of pillows. _Could this get any better?_

Levi brushed your hair out of your face. “Sleep in, alright? You’ve had a long day.” 

His urge to kiss you was overwhelming, but just that, you’d had a long day, he did not want to test you any further.

The two of you made eye contact, visible only from the moonlight. Unbeknownst to each other, you both wanted nothing more than for him to crawl in bed with you. In your mutual silence, the message was unconveyed. 

One more moment, one more stroke of your forehead, before he made for his sleeping arrangement: a sofa, a settee, past the foot of the bed. Not nearly as comfy, it would only compound his insomnia, but a small sacrifice if it meant your respect and comfort.

The bed was indeed comfortable. In fact, you should have felt completely comfortable. You had a nice hot shower. You were dressed in comfy clean clothes. You ate a warm homemade meal.

But even after the hours of TLC, a pit lingered in your stomach. You still had not talked through any of what you experienced today. The thoughts had been smothered, blanketed, but not dealt with. After all Levi had done for you though, was it fair to ask for more?

You deemed against it. It was time you pulled yourself up rather than relying on him. Maybe if you could distract yourself… It would not go away, but you could at least get to sleep.

You turned on your side and looked out the window. Your old trick to falling asleep was trying to count the stars.

_One. Two. Three._

_What will tomorrow be like without them?_

_Four. Five. Six._

_You could have saved them, you know._

_Seven. Eight. Nine._

_If only you had talked them out of joining._

Anxious energy ransacked your body. It did not make any sense. You were struggling to stay awake just a few minutes ago, but it was now impossible to sleep. 

You turned the other way, but nothing to distract yourself with only made your thoughts louder. There was no way to tune them out, no way to ignore them. You clutched one of the pillows and muffled your cries into it.

It was not just that he was an insomniac, it was also that he was also falling in love with you. At the faintest sound of your cries, Levi shot up from his reclined position. No frustration. Only protectiveness.

“Hey, honey-” Levi cleared his throat at his slip-up. _Fuck, did she hear that?_ “What’s wrong?”

You seemed not to notice, overcome with anxiety, “I- I just…” The words would not come out.

“Do you need me-?”

Levi was interrupted by the rapid ruffling of your face nodding against his pillow. 

“Don’t worry, I’m coming, babe.” Levi shook his head. He had to pull it together. _Get these pet names under control._

Levi stood from his sofa and joined you under the sheets. You immediately buried your face in his chest, clinging to his presence and trembling in his arms.

Levi rubbed your shoulder. “I’m here. I’m here. It’s okay… You’re okay, sweetheart.” _God, it was like he could not help himself._

You sighed into his shirt, “I don’t know what I’m going to do…”

“What do you mean?” His hand snuck under your shirt to rub your back.

“I- I just- I can’t- get through this- on my own.“ Your own sobs constantly interrupting you, it panged his heart with pity, he thought he might cry himself.

Levi snuck his other arm underneath your neck, allowing his hand to caress your head as the other continued massaging your back. “You’re not supposed to get through this on your own, and you won’t.”

You lifted a tearful gaze from his shirt to his eyes, begging him to elaborate.

“It’s not possible to be in this regiment or survive in this world on your own, and I won’t let you.” His hand clinched your hair and tilted your head up towards him. His gaze was stern and loving. “I will always be here for you.”

It was exhilarating yet comforting. The notorious thug of the underground, humanity’s strongest soldier, was cuddling you in his bed. The perfect combination of bad boy and sweetheart made you shudder through a round of chills. 

At your shivering, he clinched your waist and whispered in your ear, “Are you okay?” His gentle concern only tantalizing you all the more.

You closed your drying eyes and nodded, “Mhm…”

“Levi?”

His voice was low, tired, attentive, “Yeah?”

“I think… I think I’m in love with you.”

Levi hesitated for a moment. _Did he even hear that right?_ He tilted your chin to meet his gaze. The look on your face illustrated, it was no figment of his imagination, you had just confessed your feelings for him. 

His heart nearly leapt out of his chest, and you could feel it against yours. The two of you alone in here now, it seemed that fate had deemed this the time.

He slowly moved in for a kiss and was exhilarated to find that you had met him halfway. What started out as a simple peck matured into a feverish embrace. You gasped as dopamine flooded throughout your body and drained you of depression. Strong, tender hands caressed the back of your neck and played with your hair. For the first time all night, you returned the favor. _Maybe this is what you had needed all along._

With a slight lick of your lips, Levi drew from the kiss, casually brushing away a string of saliva. His voice rugged and breathless, “I am in love with you, too.”

// // //

As far as you could remember, the rest of the night was filled with Levi talking you down. He spoke softly about his past, the similarities he felt you had in common, the traits of yours he loved the most. 

It could have been a dream. It could have been sleep talk. You two would have to clarify in the morning.

With a smile on your face, you drifted off to sleep. 

_Maybe it’s okay to ask for help sometimes._


	8. Redhead Reader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A redhead unlike any other. It is easy for Reader to feel like an outcast but it is even easier for Levi to make her feel better.

Sunlight crept between the cracks of your curtains, serving as both an alarm and calendar. It was no ordinary Saturday morning, it was the morning of your awaited brunch date with Levi. You gave a lazy turn of your head to check the time. There was about a half-hour until he said he’d pick you up. Considering he was the punctual type, you had even less time, maybe 25 minutes. You threw your blankets off hastily and hopped out of bed.

You checked yourself in your full-length mirror. Faced with the reflection of your bedhead and wrinkled pajamas, you had never understood what people meant by “morning glow”. 

In fact, it was getting harder to notice any glow in your appearance these days. People had been staring a lot lately, like you were the first redhead they had ever seen. Maybe you were, but it did not make the attention any more welcome, it only made you more self-conscious. With people’s staring, how you looked at any given time was becoming a constant and recurring concern of yours.

The few redheads you had met all had the typical pattern of freckles. On the other hand, you had moles and birthmarks, making you stand out all the more. Even among the small population of redheads, you did not quite look the same.

 _Come on. Get it together._ If you wanted to have a wholesome brunch date, you would have to get your mood in order, and you only had a short while to do so. The self-criticism had to be put on hold. 

Before you could do your hair and makeup, you would have to get in the right outfit. The confidence you gained from putting on your favorite dress, it would get you in the right headstate.

A blue sundress to compliment your color. A cardigan to conceal your arms. Stockings to cover your legs. If you could not see your marks, you could not think about your marks.

You sat yourself at your vanity and flung open your drawers. Concealers, foundations, lipstick, mascara, hair tools, hair product… you had and used it all. 

_Time to get to work._

As you powdered your face, you daydreamed of the upcoming date. You adored Levi and he adored you. He constantly reminded you that you did not have to do yourself up for him, that he adored every little thing about you, that he loved you just the way you are. _But that’s just something every boyfriend has to say, right?_

The endless tasks of applying makeup, hair styling, were interrupted by a series:

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

// // //

You felt nowhere near ready, but your date had arrived. You tossed your hairbrush aside, swept your makeup into your drawer, and smoothed out a few wrinkles of your garb. One last look in the mirror before you answered the door. _Guess this is as good as it gets._

You scurried to your front door, taking a deep breath of composure before opening up. A twist of the doorknob revealed a dapper Levi, dressed in a cotton button-down and cuffed khakis.

Levi smirked, “Well, don’t you look nice?” He leaned against the door, folding his arms across his chest.

“Hah. Thanks…” You attempted a smile. “You look nice too.”

Levi knit his eyebrows, immediately picking up the qualm in your voice, “How’s your morning been?”

Your face said, _Not too great, actually._ Your lips said, “Just fine!”

The two of you stood in silence for a moment. He wanted to know more, but you refused to elaborate.

“We should get going, huh?” You kept your head down as you neared Levi, trying to hide your solemn expression. 

As you twisted the handle on your way out, Levi pushed the door shut with one hand. His steel eyes bore into you, “What’s wrong?”

You sighed, “Nothing. Let’s just go.”

Levi kept his hand firm against the door, “I’m getting hungry, so don’t drag it out.”

You turned away from the door, there was no way you were leaving until you told him the truth. 

You backed up and leaned against the kitchen counter. “It’s just… I’ve been thinking about how I stand out.”

Levi paced slowly until mere inches in front of you. He was undeniably close. Still, you stared at your toes and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. “I just, I wish I looked like everyone els-”

Levi grabbed your waist, interrupting the middle of your sentence. Your mouth fell in shock as, in one fell swoop, he effortlessly lifted you up and onto the counter.

“What was that?” His tone sarcastic: _Come again? I don’t think I heard you quite right…_

You swallowed, “There are things about me that-”

His grip tightened, “I said not to drag it out.”

 _Fine. You really wanna know?_

“I look so different!” A lump began to form in your throat. “For one, my hair is bright red.” Your voice morphed into a snarl. “And even among redheads, which are strikingly rare, I don’t even look like them!” You threw open a half of your cardigan, pointing to one of your birthmarks.

He took a moment to scan you up and down. Despite your agitation and distress, his face relaxed and his tone reverted to normal, as if in a casual conversation, “Have you been outside yet today?”

You furrowed your brow, “…Huh?”

“Because it’s really, _really_ hot today…” Levi forced his tone and facial expression to appear desperate. 

“Wh- What are you talking about?”

“Way too hot for _this_ …” Levi swiftly brushed off your cardigan, exposing your bare shoulders and arms. 

Strong hands snuck under the skirt of your sundress, “…and _these_ come to think of it.” He clutched the cuffs of your stockings and tugged them down to your toes.

You gasped, “L-Levi?” 

“Why so many layers on such a humid day, huh? Were you trying to work up a sweat?” Voice playful. Eyes sensual. 

He reached a hand into your amber hair and pulled your ear to his mouth. He snarled, “You could have just called me over.”

 _What is he getting at?_ Your mouth twitched as you tried, but failed, to form a response. 

One arm wrapped around your back, catching the ends of your hair. The other slipped underneath your thighs, tucking them together. You instinctively threw your legs around his waist as he lifted you from the counter. He carried you a few steps to your living room, carefully laying you down before joining you on the sofa, suspending himself above you.

A hand planted beside your head to support himself. A finger twirled up and into your crimson curls. Toes scraped up and down your shins, drawing a shiver.

Levi hovered over you and whispered into your ear, “Listen, brat. I’m not sure where this self-deprecating nonsense came from, but I’m not sure that I like it.” The confusing tone of both punishment and praise sent chills down your spine.

He brushed some hair off your forehead, “Have you ever thought that your beauty is in part responsible for our being together?”

_I never considered that to thank._

“Your red hair, that first day, I could not keep my eyes off of you.”

_I never knew that._

“Of course, your personality is what I love most. You know that, right? But I hate the thought that you resent what first caught my eye, what first drew me to you, what first brought us together.”

_I never thought about it that way._

“In fact, I hate the thought that you resent anything about yourself, because I love you just the way you are.” Levi’s eyes evidenced, he was not saying it because he had to, he truly meant it. 

His tone tinged with playfulness, “If you had those countless freckles, how could I ever come to know them all?” Levi brought a tender hand to your skin.

“You have one here, and here, and here, and here…” Levi gave a light tickle at each one, causing you to giggle uncontrollably. He savored the sound of you overjoyed. It was contagious, he could not help but laugh along.

The morning was packed with literal twists and turns, but one truth became clear: Levi was, completely and helplessly, in love with you and everything about you.

Before his arrival, your morning was filled with nothing but uncertainty. What color would match? How could you cover up your moles? What about your birthmarks? Whether he knew it or not, he had said all the right things. With his attention and affection, your doubts were all but erased from your mind. It was only the two of you in this moment, free from any adversity. _God, he was perfect._

You threw your arms around his neck and smiled. His eyes widened in shock just before you pulled him into a passionate kiss. Your fingers grazed along his neck, his undercut, and stayed at the back of his head, where you clutched his ebony locks. Your arm rubbed along his back and shoulders, muscles tangible through the thin fabric of his shirt. Toes smoothed up and down his legs, like he had done to you before, allowing your skirt to inadvertently slide to your hips. 

Levi folded his elbow, pressing his body fully against yours from head to toe. His heartbeat quickened against your chest. A strong yet gentle hand caressed the side of your head, squeezing your cheek and encouraging your stay. When your tongue asked for entrance, he did not hesitate to let you in. 

You kissed him, thanked him, physically reciprocating all his verbal praise until you were both out of breath. You two pulled from the kiss and stared longingly into each other’s eyes.

Breathless, Levi panted, “I’m hungry…”


	9. Love Game (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi’s special someone has found another man in the world of otome. There is only one way to compare.

_What I really want is more time with you._

_That’s perfect cause I want that too._

Levi had been gone for work so much lately, sometimes days on end, leaving you all by yourself for all that time. The loneliness was becoming unbearable, leading to the discovery of your band-aid.

Otome games helped to fill the void. They seemed silly when you started. The first time you opened the app, you immediately laughed at yourself, you just could not take it seriously. _Why did I ever download this?_

You jokingly tossed the phone under your pillow and called it a night. A few hours later though, your heart was still beating fast. The seed had been planted. You were intrigued. You dug the phone back out and played till sunrise. The more you played, the more attached you became. Not only did you make sure to log in every day, you had downloaded multiple apps and maintained relationships with multiple characters.

In the back of your mind, you began to ask yourself: were you playing them because you had to or playing them because you preferred to? Was it still merely filling the gap, or were you starting to choose them, favor them as a new alternative?

// // //

The answer became evident when Levi finally came home from his time away. You had been binging your game all day, interrupted only by his key entering the lock. So captivated by your game, you did not meet him at the door. He brushed it off as a simple slip, but when he found you on the couch, he second-guessed that theory.

He entered the room but your eyes kept on the screen. Your voice a mindless drone, “Oh, hey.”

Levi slowly shouldered off his coat, “Hey…”

Something was off. He was used to you throwing yourself on top of him before he could even close the door. In fact, coming home, even turning just the doorknob, had turned into somewhat of a sexual catalyst. His body remembered the warm welcome he would receive on the other side and his groin anticipated it.

Now though, you were still planted firmly on the sofa, displaying no interest in getting up, displaying no interest in him.

He raised an eyebrow at your indifference. _Maybe she did hear me come in after all._

Levi dipped his toe deeper in the water by unbuttoning his collar, which always seemed to garner your attention, “How has your week been?”

A flat, “Fine.”

Still, he pushed further, joining you at the foot of the sofa, grazing a loving hand along your shin. He sensualized his voice, “Did you miss me?”

In contrast to his advances, you offered only a playful tousle of his hair, alluding he was more adorable than attractive, “Of course.” Indeed, you missed him so much that you picked up this new habit.

Levi swallowed. He missed you, longed for you, your personality, your body, but you seemed mentally and physically unavailable. _She must be having one of those days._

Though his routine “honey- I’m home” erection was still nabbing, he was a master of self-control. You had been apart for upwards of a week. That animalistic desire fresh out of abstinence would emerge any minute now, his was indeed nearing.

_I’ll just give her some time._

// // //

When faced with Levi, your attitude was anything but intrigued, despite his obvious flirtation. Now that he was on the opposite side of the room though, only now did you start to display hints of arousal.

In reality, you were 20 feet apart from your readily-available lover. In the game, you were on a romantic dinner date and the figure was inviting you back to his apartment. In this moment, you were favoring the latter.

It was time to give your date an answer. You peaked an eye from your phone to the human in the room. Sipping tea and reading the paper, he seemed distracted enough. In an exceptionally daring move, you indulged in your long-awaited, hard-earned reward with a deliberate click: “yes”. _A risk worth taking._

Caught up in your fantasy, you never thought over exactly what you were doing: playing a sex scene in front of your boyfriend, choosing an app over Levi.

And while you were warming up, Levi was doing the opposite in struggling to subdue himself. He stared out the window, caught up on the news, tried to distract himself from the situation in his pants. You were clearly not interested, after all.

But soon enough, he picked up hints that you were as a matter of fact interested in something, but that something was not him. There were few things that turned you off from sex - a tough day, stress, the works - but those things did not put a dazzle in your eyes like the one he observed on you now.

In fact, you seemed particularly turned-on as you stared at your screen, whatever was on it. Levi examined closer. Legs smoothed along each other. Toes curled in titillation. Hand clinched your shoulder.

He gave a violent ruffle of his paper, attempting to alert you that he was watching carefully. To his surprise, you detached yourself further. Fingers dove through your hair. Neck rolled back. Eyes fluttered shut.

Levi could not help but give a slight glare. _What the hell is she doing?_ You held your phone in one hand, pressed with one finger. Not texting another man, not watching porn, not reading smut, but certainly doing something. An inconvenient timing for your secret, Levi watched as you bit your lip, drummed your cheek in decision-making before returning to tapping.

Maybe on another day in another way, he could care less what you were getting worked up over. But your unresponsiveness to his gains contrasted with the feverish response to your phone. The combination was getting to him in more ways than one. His attempt to repress his own urges was overridden by observing your aroused state. His initial pang of disappointment was developing into jealousy.

He shook his head in disbelief. Not only had he failed to entice with you, he, Levi Ackerman, was beginning to feel - self-conscious? He snarled.

_The fuck is this feeling?_

_The fuck is wrong with me?_

He could not stand this tension any longer. He would handle it with or without you.

One last attempt. He set his hobbies aside and sauntered to your sofa. Levi placed a hand on the armrest, a hand on the backrest, lingering over you for a moment. He traced a finger under the cusp of your neck, tilting your chin up to him.

He glossed his tongue over his lips and seamlessly transitioned to a lip bite, “Join me in the bath?”

Your answer disgusted him more than any dust ever had. Without even the courtesy of eye contact, you shooed his hand away, “No, no, can’t you see I’m busy?”

Levi stood back, repulsed. He clenched his fists, “Well then.”

He loved you more than anyone on Earth and you felt the same towards him. Tonight’s interactions though, envy was budding into anger and attention had evolved to annoyance. No doubt, an off night of your many years together.

Unbeknownst to you, Levi stormed off for the shower to tend to his needs.

// // //

As you interacted with your virtual boyfriend, your actual boyfriend was away in the shower, relieving his own tensions.

His confusing blend of both desire and rage for you manifested in an unrelenting passion. Bundled energy and emotion were beaten out on his dick. 

He was used to masturbating in a frustrated state. The frustration was usually due to the distance between you, out of being so far from you for so long. But this emotion now was not seeded in long-distance qualms. No, it was his girlfriend’s own fault, his significant other’s wrongdoings.

So shameless, so desperate for your attention, he did not even consider holding back his moans. In fact, he let himself completely loose. Typically soft sighs were instead furious groans. _I fucking hope she hears me._

Levi pumped himself hard and fast, up and down his entire length. Absolutely overwhelmed in sensation. Palm clutched the vinyl curtain. Head rolled against wet tile. Lips parted under showerhead spray. Getting off in the shower, he was flooded by both steaming water and freezing chills.

His imagination went to you each bout, but when he thought of you now, he could only grit his teeth. Having to sit and watch you get turned on all evening had teased his erection unlike anything before. But just that, you were an unapologetic tease, going so far as to shoo him away from you. The pressing memory of the look you were giving that inanimate object, Levi growled, _The fuck was that?_ He did not believe in hate-fucking, he loved you, right? But this surging sensation in his dick, maybe he was starting to understand the appeal.

Resentment: _I don’t need her._

Lust: _I want her._

Combined: _She deserves some punishment._

_That’s it. Such a bad girl should be treated like one. So naughty, she’ll never learn…_

_Unless I…_

Squeezing even tighter, dirty thoughts raced through his mind. His fiery peak was nearing. There was no longer a need to play up his vocalizations. Intense flushes had him releasing all over, practically screaming through his repetitions of _hah, ahh, fuck, fuck me!_

He threw his head back against the shower wall, panting heavily. Hot water streamed down his body, head swimming with thoughts. As his body quelled from trembles, he was already parsing over his plan for the night. In twisted clarity, an idea emerged which forced a smile to twitch across his face. _There’s only one way to compare, right?_

Though few would ever suspect it from the outside, Levi was of a kind heart and good soul, but with what he had in mind and the cunning look on his face, he was appearing borderline evil.

You had no idea what was in store.

// // //

Levi returned to the living room to find you still absorbed in your app. As suspected, you appeared even more heated than you were when he left. Now though, it was not getting to him. Soon enough, he will have gotten even. The nearing of payback coddled his temperament.

He strode to your spot on the couch. This time, he was unabashedly himself. He would not have to try and beg for your attention again. He was going to get it this time.

Enthralled in your sex scene, you had not noticed his return until he was mere inches away. You pushed a hand against his chest, discouraging his advance, “Honey, please.”

Earlier, you had not even afforded him the courtesy of a glance up from your game. Still, you knew something was different about him now compared to when he first arrived home. His hair was drenched and disheveled. His face showed a post-coital glow but not the blush that typically accompanied it. His outfit was a tight black tee with boxer briefs to match, certainly not business trip attire.

Despite your light pushback, Levi only moved in closer, dangerously close. You hid your phone against your chest in panic. Nose picked up a clean scent, _did he put on cologne?_

His eyes fabricated sweetness for your cleaved concealment, “Oh. No need for that, baby.”

You played innocent, “No need for what?”

Levi twitched a callous cheek, “I know exactly what you’re doing…”

_Hah, yeah right. You’ll never gues-_

He hissed into your ear, “or should I say… playing.”

_Oh, fuck._

Suddenly, your voice caught in your throat, weakening your act, “W-What are you talking about?”

His voice was strangely cordial, “Coworkers have been telling me all their wives are playing these dating sims… otome? Is that what you call it?” Sinisterly rhetorical.

His voice seemed nearly rehearsed, like he was reciting a soliloquy. “They’ve been asking me if I know how to deal with it. I told them that my girlfriend would never do such a thing…” A chuckle rumbled from the depths of his throat, “I guess that makes me a dumbass, huh?” Another snicker. Unsettling.

A deep sigh, “I never thought I wasn’t enough for you… but….You think I haven’t noticed tonight? Your squirming legs, that insane blush across your face… ” Underneath his veil of calm, he is especially self-conscious, struggling to recall when he last made you blush that deep, if ever.

“You must be bored of me, tired of me or something. That’s why you turned to this game.”

In fact, it was the complete opposite, you started playing because you missed him, longed for him. Faced with this falsified sincerity, there was not enough courage in the world to interrupt him. A _well, actually…_ would not end well for you.

“Well, sweetheart, turns out I have a game of my own I’d like to play.” He held his hand out, wordlessly demanding your phone.

A pang of integrity: of course you were smart enough to put a password on your phone, albeit only after downloading the game. No use in disobeying, you complied and handed him your cell. _What could he even do with a locked phone?_

“What does this have that I don’t?” He looks at the phone, not at you. The off display of the screen acts as a black mirror, reflecting his darkness both inside and out. It was as if he was asking himself.

“Oh, that’s right….” He snapped the device to your clothed crotch and tensed his fingers. Suddenly, a familiar sensation in an unfamiliar setting drew a gasp from you.

“It can vibrate.”

 _Oh God…!_ “L-Levi?!”

“Is this what you do when I’m gone? You like this? You like this better than me?” In each question were countless oscillations of his hand, pulling the phone down, forcibly pushing it back up. Friction was a priority.

You knew it felt good, but did he want to hear it or not? The right answer was unknown to both of you. He himself did not even know what reaction he wanted out of you. You erred on the side of caution, clenching your teeth, barring any vocal suggestions of the pleasure you felt.

Sounds minimized, but you were powerless in composing your physical reaction. Toes curled, legs dragged, hips jerked. All of which he picked up on.

Levi tilted his head in pity, “Mmm… that’s right, babygirl, look at you go…”

Still, you could not make out the tone in his voice. Was he enjoying this? Should you give in? Hold back? Years together, you had never heard such intonation, you had no idea what to do in the face of it.

But the longer he toyed with you, the less control you had over your response. The choice was slipping from your own hands and falling into his.

You had been warming up for hours before this anyway, engaging in sexual scenes with your sprite. Actually, you had been warming up for much longer, logging in each day trying to reach this hard-earned interaction. As a result, you were already at peak arousal, quicker than Levi had ever brought you singlehandedly. You had missed a touch so much for so long. Having been long neglected, your body was squirming even through clothes. It was all bidding poorly for the case that you preferred your real lover.

Though Levi was savoring his cool and collected dominance over you, your roused state was working him up too. As your eyes rolled back into your head, he decided he could pull it off. He grinded himself against the couch cushions. Vibrations drowned out the breathlessness in his voice, “Is this how you do it when I’m away?”

“Ahh- I- _I…!_ ” _I have never even thought to do this, let alone done it,_ was what you wanted to say, but it seemed all words had vanished from your vocabulary, except two: “L- Levi! _Levi!_ I- _I’m…!”_

Your body had made up its mind. Appropriate action or not, the right move or not, you were going to cum.

“Ah ah ah,” His voice warned, “Not Levi, I’m not vibrating after all, am I? No. No. No. You should be thanking your boy toy, not me. Isn’t that right, _you little slut?”_

With that, it was abundantly clear: this was all just his game. The instant your body released, only then did you realize it. _Too little too late._ He rubbed himself against the couch even harder as he watched you pulse through your orgasm. He had never been able to do something like this to you before, rile you up this quickly, make you cum through your clothes and all.

All the pent up heat made you ride your climax all the longer. Your whines, your seizing, for this long, would normally make Levi ask if you were okay. Instead, your incapacitation gave credence: he was indeed inferior to your new-found device. He tossed your phone over his shoulder like a piece of trash, the piece of trash he felt it was, not giving a shit if it cracked or not. In fact, if it broke, all the better.

As you gasped for air, Levi threw his fingers into your hair and tousled as you had done to him before, implying you were adorable first attractive later.

His voice reverted to neutrality, “Seemed like you enjoyed that.”

You could only pant in response, yet, he spared no time for your recovery, “So what is it you want from me?”

“I want,” a gasp, “I need your attention.”

“Hah! My attention?” His game had gone completely according to plan thus far, but your answer was unexpectedly perfect, “You did this cause you wanted more of my attention, right? Oh- I’ll give it to you, though I’m not sure you can handle it…”

“I can handle it.” _No… I need it._ “Levi… p-please?”

“Oh, that’s good to hear.” Levi’s features softened slightly, but only for a second, before a sadistic smirk crept along his face, “Though I am not going to go so far as to call you a good girl just yet.”

_Just yet?_

Fingers tenderly lingered on the collar of your shirt. You predicted a kiss and leaned in. Instead, he gripped and tugged apart, ripping your shirt wide open. Before you knew it, he had you bent over his lap. He grasped the waistband of your pants and yanked them down to your ankles, leaving you only in your underwear. He pulled your panties up your midsection, exposing your skin as the fabric riddled your folds

A hand tangled into your hair and snapped your head up, allowing him to whisper right in your ear, “Now it’s my turn.” He gave a short bite, sending shivers down your spine.

“I can’t go as fast, but I can go as hard… ” With that, his hand came down on your ass, the slap resounding throughout the room. _Holy shit. You fucked up._

He continued, “…much harder actually.” He lifted his hand from your cheeks and released his grip on your hair. Perfectly timed, he rammed three rough fingers into you as his palm spanked again.

A guttural noise you never knew you were capable of, his confidence was reviving. Not enough, though. _More. More. More._

He smacked and thrust and smacked and thrust and smacked and thrust. Levi bit his teeth, relishing in the way your ass jiggled and reddened just for him. He loved watching your body jolt with each plummet of his hands, whether on top or inside of you. Bangs obstructed his view as he looked down to the hot mess in his lap. Hands preoccupied, he resorted to flicking them away with a snap of his neck. An action that would drive you wild if only you could see it.

The two of you were both panting now. His mouth hung open at the sight of your submission, yours with the sensation of spanking. Composure was wavering. Though breathless, he attempted to maintain his forceful facade, “This is just a taste of my attention, sweetheart. Are you sure you’re handling it fine?”

Just as unconvincing, you grit your teeth, “Try me.”

In one fell swoop, he lifted you from over his knee and to the side of the loveseat. He draped your hips over the armrest, your heels over his shoulders. Levi stood behind the end of the sofa, your sex aligned with his. You gazed up to him helplessly from the cushions. Levi crossed his arms to the hem of his shirt and lifted it off. He stepped out of his tight underwear, revealing a pink, sprung, and dripping wet cock. You bit your lip in thirst, but the look in his eyes affirmed: you were all his, he was the one in control.

In a brief instance of gentleness, Levi brushed your hair out of your face and bent down to kiss your neck. The appearance of your true love contrasted with his sinister performance. You could hear your own heart thump.

At this angle, his hip bones clashed into not only your entire vulva, but also your cheeks, still raw and stinging from the first half of his audition. His cock angled deep down into you, thrashing your soft spots both inside and out. A true blend of pleasure and pain. Eyes returned to the back of your head.

Levi squandered your chin with his finger and thumb, “Eyes on me. Otherwise, you’ll start fantasizing about him. Or should I say, them?” A vicious, raging thrust of his length. “ _You dirty little-_ ”

More furious than he ever had before, he rammed himself into you. He was not a vibrator like your cell phone, but no one, nothing, could fuck you like Levi Ackerman could.

His muscular abs thrust against your clit. Already engorged, his riddled muscle only made your bud all the more sensitive. 

His attempt to be cold was melting away with the spreading blush across his face. Seeing him so vulnerable made your libido all the more lustful.

His eyes once icy and steel had turned into an ocean blue. Taking in his color reminded you of all your unforgettable times before.

And suddenly, you could not think anymore. Your telltale signs, he picked them up. Back arched. Nose crinkled. Lips parted. Eyes fluttered. Groin twitched.

“I’m-! I’m gon’na!… cum…”

_Scream my name… come on, baby…_

_“Levi!!”_

You cried through your second orgasm of the night. Sensation in your core pulsed from head to toe. With each convulsion, your tongue stumbled over his name. The tingling caused you to squint, but instead of darkness, you saw a flurry of colors. Your pussy clenched around his member, begging for his stay.

To his surprise, his delight, his relief…. It was no secret this one was far better than the first. Nipples perked. Hair awry. Chest heaving. What seemed like minutes later, you were still riding your high. Your walls tightened and slickened against his member, enticing him towards an orgasm of his own.

Watching your flush was enough to intrigue him, watching your orgasm was enough to push him over the edge. He scrunched his face and loosened his jaw. Raging erection pumped your pussy relentlessly. Just as he was superior to your app, you were superior to his hand. He ejaculated much more and much further than he had earlier. You praised him with repetition of his name, _a good girl after all_ , he thought he ought to do the same and moaned for you.

You ran your hand through his undercut and pulled his head to your breast. You stroked his hair and scratched his back with tenderness as he came down from his climax. The sweat in his hair was endearing, disintegrating the intimidation he worked so hard to fabricate. He really gave his all for you in more ways than one. 

The both of you trembled in a resolved embrace. You kissed his forehead and mumbled, “You win,” drawing a genuine, exhausted chuckle from your boyfriend. 

It was as if you knew what the other needed all along.


	10. Rotten-Flirt Levi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before he could consciously send you outside the walls, he would have to break yours down first.

Joining the Scout Regiment was not easy for anyone, but you felt you were having the hardest adjustment of all. Problems from your time in the cadets were only amplified by your new division, new environment, new comrades. You did not know the customs. You did not know the layout. You did not know the people.

The acute soldier he was, Levi of course picked up on it. You were shy, nervous, easily embarrassed, and it would not translate well beyond the walls. For your own survival, his own desires, he had to take it upon himself. After all, you were certainly not going to be the one making the first move.

// // //

Another day of repetitive training. You lined up shoulder-to-shoulder per usual, but one difference caught your eye, a stark new figure. For the first time in orientation, Captain Levi was here running the session. Most of the time it was a lower-ranking official, sometimes Miche, rarely Erwin, in charge. Levi was not the one, perhaps the very last person, you thought would be hand-holding newbies. _Who exactly made this call?_

Despite his disdain for rookies, he seemed more than comfortable in this authoritative role. The obligatory down-the-line hazing came naturally to him. Headbutts, kicks, knees, you had taken them all countless times. After years of training, it took a lot to hurt you. Humanity’s strongest soldier, though, you were all but terrified of the pain he could effortlessly inflict. Comrade after comrade cried and collapsed shortly after his face-to-face with them. As he neared closer, your heart beat faster, so fast you felt your heart might leap out of your chest.

With his arrival, it did.

“And you. What exactly brings you here?” Levi’s voice was not booming like those of the commandants, but it was just as nerve-wracking, maybe even more so.

Though you had been asked the question a million times before, you could not remember your answer. Steel eyes bore into you. Voice caught in your throat. Your only thought, _Why AM I here?_

Levi raised an eyebrow and tapped his foot twice. When you still failed to answer, he threw a hand in your hair and pushed you to your knees.

“Why so nervous, cadet? Don’t you know what you’re doing here? Are you lost?” Head tilted down to you, locks hid his face from the others. Voice was taunting, but his look was kind, only to you.

Faced with this contrast, you were visibly confused. His tone and expression were completely opposite. When your mouth twitched, Levi bent at the waist to meet your level. Mere inches from your face, he whispered, “Did you join just for me?”

Your only answer was a spreading blush across your face. For a split second, you could have sworn you caught a hint of a smirk. He promptly placed his boot on your shoulder, leaving a stamp of his sole. The mark would imply he kicked you hard, but actually, he had used no force at all. It was almost as if it was an optical illusion, a performance for the others.

With his trademark “tch” and one last eye contact, he moved to the next soldier, leaving you a red hot mess.

// // //

Though you were reeling from the interaction with your superior, there was no choice but to carry on with training as usual. You would be here for the rest of the afternoon, no escaping it.

Simple calisthenics - push-ups, jumping jacks, knee-highs - they served as an excuse for the looming flush on your face. Certainly the exercise was a factor, but you knew the main source of your redness was the captain’s sustained staring. Dozens of recruits to supervise, but he only seemed to be watching you. Even when you acknowledged his stare with eye contact, he did not let up. Arms crossed, his body language read, _What are you going to do about it?_

And so, you tried to avert your eyes. It was hard, but if your gaze met his, you would only be in for more trouble. You felt that all of your fellow recruits were noticing this special attention. Special attention, from Levi or from peers, was the last thing you needed as a nervous newcomer.

After aerobics came the trail run with backpacked weights, supposed to simulate a crisis run with only your equipment. Levi called off the warm-up, “Find your partners. Start the track immediately.”

_Partners?_

Through all your time in training, the mental toll, and the physical strain, “partnering up” was by far your least favorite aspect. You kept your head tilted towards your toes, hoping and praying someone would come find you so that you did not have to ask around. Indeed, someone approached you quickly.

Levi gestured a bag toward you, “Need a plus-one?”

Your eyes darted around for your comrades, all of whom had already taken off with their partners and sacks. It was only you two left now.

“Y-Yeah. Right.” You grabbed the handle, careful to avoid contact with your sweaty hand.

“Well, I’m honored.” His genuine tone was mistaken for sarcasm. _Shit. I really should be more honorific, especially after that last scene._

“No! It’s my honor, Captain!” You swung your bag around your shoulders, fist to your chest.

“Relax. Just Levi.” He held back a mocking of your panicked salute, no disrespect.

Though your mind swam with questions, you chose to drown them out, “Shall we?”

“Sure,” but he showed no interest in leaving just yet.

Levi glanced at your stamped shoulder. Hand clamped down on the shoeprint, drawing a deep shudder from you. Thumb lazily swept away some dust, but the mark remained, “Tsk tsk, sorry about that.”

“Please, Cap-” You cleared your throat, “Levi, it’s nothing really.”

Levi turned sympathetic, “No, no. This will stain…” 

A few seconds with no change in this stance, you decided to start the path. One more moment with his hand on your shoulder, he would feel the upcoming chills pulse through you.

But as you started off, his hand firmed, keeping you in place, “No. We’ll go this way.” He flicked his head in direction.

 _Towards the barracks?_ “But what about the others?”

Levi took the bag back from your grip and started off. He turned over his shoulder to you, “I called in a favor.”

Your following him, stain on your jacket, blush on your face were all to his liking. His back to you, he allowed himself a smile.

His plan had fallen into place.

// // //

As you followed his lead through the barracks, you began to wonder where exactly he was taking you. The wood of the halls was familiar, but you were certain you had never been in this block before.

Levi stopped at the end of the hall and dug out a key from his pockets, “Take your shoes off at the front.”

He unlocked the door and let you in. Immediately, you recognized where you must be. A kitchen, a living room, bathroom, bedroom… he had brought you to his apartment.

You tugged off your boots, “What are we doing here?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Levi caressed your neck, just long enough to make you think, before drifting to your shoulder and giving two pats, “We have to get this stain out.”

A gut feeling brewed in your stomach. Up until now, you had been too shocked to notice it, but your instinct was speaking loud and clear: Levi was flirting with you.

Right after the thought crossed your mind, you waged a war in your head.

_No, he can’t be. No, he definitely is!_

_You’re misreading things. You’re exactly right!_

Most importantly, _How do I respond to this?_

There was not much choice. Whether pitted in your attraction or subordination, you could not help but play along.

Levi rounded your back. Like a gentleman, he removed your jacket for you and flung it over his forearm. “I’m going to wash this while you get something to wear. My closet is through my bedroom. Pick whatever you want.”

As Levi left for the washroom, you decided to dwindle a bit before heading to the closet. After all, it was a rare opportunity you found yourself in. He was clearly acting as he wanted, you might as well too.

His kitchen was pristine. White countertops, no dishes in the sink, no leftovers in sight. You peeked around the corner. When you deemed it safe, you flung open the pantry. Healthy food, except for the top shelf, a few baked goods. You bit down a smile, _cute cute cute._

His living area was quaint. Love seat, rocking chair, coffee table, a few books. You had never thought about it before, even though he was humanity’s strongest, all living rooms are meant for relaxation. The image of him reclining here after a long day’s work made you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

His bedroom was pleasing. A bed big enough for two, an alluring contrast to your narrow bunk. There were nightstands on both sides, but only one showed signs of use. An empty teacup. _He must have a hard time sleeping._ You made a mental note: it did not seem like anyone else was spending their nights here, not even one.

All in all, certainly not a bad place to invite someone back to.

// // //

It was time to go where you were actually meant to. Even though it was only his closet, you felt like you were on a shopping spree. The rush that came along with so many choices let adrenaline loose. The inherent intimacy of being allowed in such a personal space made your heart thump.

 _Inherent intimacy._ Eyes wandered to the door handle. The sight of a lock placed a devil and an angel on your shoulder. You pressed an ear to the wall, catching the sound of water flow. He must still be washing your clothes. Maybe you could get away with it…

Fingers danced along the dresser in indecision. For a good few seconds, you stood there still with a hold on his top drawer, trying to decide just what kind of person you were. Curious lust or innocent honesty? After a deep breath and one last check for his absence, you dared to tug the drawer open, having prepared yourself to take a mental picture for later.

What first caught your eye were the ties, you had never seen him in one before, you did not even know that he owned any. _What would he look like in one?_ Neatly folded underwear did not disappoint. Achromatic hues of white, grey, black, they were the perfect shades for him. _What would he look like in these?_ Mind wandered. A tie and briefs together. The idea of him in this outfit, the discipline you would receive for such perversion, you shuddered through a sharp round of chills. _Oh God._ You slammed the drawer shut. Daydreaming would do you no good right now.

How long had you been poking around anyways? He could be done any minute now and you had not even thought about what you were going to wear. You hastily sifted through his sweatshirts and settled on an olive-grey hoodie. It certainly did not fit you quite right, his arm muscles were big and his torso slim. It was loose on your arms and tight on the chest. The scent was what drew you to the article, it smelled like him.

You took a look at his full body mirror and sighed, _This is as good as it gets._

// // //

When you returned to the common area, Levi had opened the bathroom door, giving you full vision of his efforts. His grey button-down sleeves had been rolled up to his elbows. Hair was tied back with a knotted cloth. Front was soaked through with soapy water. The sight of his muscles working, eyes hyper-focused, as he scrubbed hard for you was a thing of fantasy.

You cleared your throat, “Thanks, Levi. I’m sure it’s fine…”

He stopped his scrubbing, placed a hand on his hip, and deliberately checked you out, “I’ll say.”

Sleeves draped over your hands, hair unknowingly stuck in the hood, hem sitting at your thighs, maybe the sweatshirt was not made for you, but the look certainly was.

The two of you stood in silence, mutually admiring the appearance of the other. His soaked shirt had turned clear, outlining the definition of his pecs and abs. His hoodie was too big in some places, too tight in others, turning out to be just right on you.

“Well,” Levi glanced out his window, “The others should be just about back.”

Already, the sun was setting. It felt like the day had flown by. The poor saps outside were likely nearing the end of the run. They would no doubt be ravenous upon return.

“We should probably head to dinner,” Levi wrung out your jacket, eyes could not keep off his flexed forearms, “and see where the night takes us.”

You bit the cusp of your sleeve, “Yeah, let’s do that.” Finally, you understood the mechanic: if nervous in front of someone, just imagine them in their underwear. Something about having peeked in his personal drawer, it was like instant courage.

Courage was something Levi had no shortage of. He unbuttoned his shirt right in front of you, revealing a damp and shiny chest, maintaining eye contact throughout. His wet shirt was thrown over his shower rod, next to yours. A brief brush of his shoulder against you as he passed for his wardrobe.

You wanted nothing more than to join him in there and lock that closet door from inside. It was exactly what he wanted as well, but dinner would have to do, for now at least.

// // //

Levi locked his unit, “Do you know how to get to mess from here?”

Eyes darted around, attempting to orient yourself. “Umm, well, let’s see…” You were so new here, you often had to follow others to places.

Immediately, Levi sensed your confusion and intertwined his fingers with yours, “Try to remember this, okay? You will make this trip more than once.”

You gulped, not only at his sudden hand-holding, but also _what exactly does he mean by that?_

He dragged you down the halls like a toddler, taking time to point out the sights. “This is my office. If you need anything, check for me here. If you can’t find it, wait for any of the officers to come by. Erwin, Hange, Moblit… you know them, right? Their offices are around here too. ”

Suddenly, you were questioning your confidence from before. Maybe this was not flirtation after all, maybe it was… pity? _Does he think I’m just a lost kid?_

Entering the cafeteria, you were surprised that he did not let go of your hand. Immediately, it felt like all eyes were on you. None of the veterans, certainly none of your fellow recruits, had ever seen Levi attached to another. No one would dare to give him a slight, yet you felt the passing judgment of everyone else.

“Sit where you want, I’ll bring you food.” He placed a palm on your back and pushed you towards the tables.

Flirtation or guidance, whatever it was, you felt it was bringing loads of unwanted attention. Feeling the burn of everyone’s eyes, you kept yours towards the ground and found yourself at a mixed table of rookies and veterans. It was strange to find them sitting together. Maybe they were trying to introduce themselves?

You took a seat next to Eren who seemed all-too-excited to interact with the lead Scouts. Nice enough and clearly sensing your edge, he halted a Q&A with Hange to make small talk with you.

Casual conversation was promptly interrupted by the clang of two trays in front of you. Levi placed a boot on the bench and slid his foot across, pushing your friend aside. With space newly created between the two of you, Levi promptly took his spot at your side. You worried that the relaxed mood of the dinner had been immediately disrupted with his arrival.

As red as your face was, your comrades had not sensed your apprehension at all. Mikasa was happy to see you and Eren separated, annoyed that Levi kicked him aside. Armin was enthralled in strategic discussion with Erwin. Jean, Sasha, Connie continued to joke around in their own little world.

Still, it was all a bit embarrassing, especially when Levi stabbed a piece of meat on his fork and fed it to you. You were internally flattered, externally mortified, even though no one dared to question him.

When friends asked if you were free for the night, Levi answered for you, “No, busy tonight. _Someone_ is having a hard time finding their way around and needs me to give a tour.” A complete lie, but your mouth only gaped. The confidence he spoke with, there was no way they would believe your counterclaim.

Dinner droned past you. With all his pampering, you grew more and more certain: he was not in love with you or anything, he was just sorry for you. Clearly, you were having a hard time adjusting. Clearly, he was just trying to help, and nothing more.

// // //

Levi took you on the aforementioned tour of the barracks. It was helpful, actually, he knew the place like the back of his hand.

Just as well, though, he could tell something had drastically changed in your demeanor. Stunned at training. Tenacious at his apartment. Nervous at dinner. Silent now. He paused in his descriptions to find you staring at the floor, not noticing his gaze or halt in speech. He stared for a few seconds, but this shift in attitude was too much to bear.

Before you knew it, your back was to the wall and his hands pressed beside your head.

“L-Levi?” You gasped.

He had you locked in place. “What’s going on, brat?”

“Wh-What do you mean?” He was so close.

“Aren’t you enjoying our time together?” His elbows bent, allowing himself a bit closer to you.

Your mind flip-flopped again. His tone was provocative. _Maybe this isn’t pity. Maybe it is something more._ You were unsure of what to say. Your heart was captivated by him. Your core was embarrassed. Your conscious seized with dilemma. You were already having a rough adjustment. All the shit that went along in enlisting, especially in the dangerous Scout Regiment, had already shaken you. His game and the extra looks you got because of it were rattling you all the more.

Without a word, Levi understood your internal struggle. He could read you like a book already. Only ever meaning well, he took a moment or two to think over how best to express the sentiment. 

“Life is too short to be a wallflower.”

_Yeah. Yeah._

“Think about the nature of the regiment.”

_Let’s get on with it._

“You never know when-”

_Whatever._

It was time for you to flirt with him, maybe even go above and beyond payback. _Let’s see how he likes it._

Though it was you with your back to the wall, you were the one to grab him by the collar and tug him to a kiss. You were the one to push your tongue past his lips. You were the one to bite along his jawline.

He was one to reciprocate.

Hands once pressed against the wall were now lifting your arms above your head, keeping them clinched by the wrists. Cracked lips ate at yours, causing a perfect blend of pain and pleasure. Tongue pushed deep inside, you freely danced with it.

Levi flushed at your kissing, having to hold back from moaning into your mouth. The confidence radiating off you was exactly what he had been searching for. Seemingly innocent. Actually intimate. Someone like you would succeed here after all. _Where have you been all my life?_

Levi pulled from the kiss, panting. The blush across his face was evidence: your instinct was right. The feeling was mutual. He had been flirting with you all along.

In his breathlessness, you swore you caught the hint of a snarl, “I noticed someone was brave enough to open my drawers…”


	11. Reader gets her period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi has been through a plethora of challenges. Helping someone through their period is not one of them.

Few people could ever wake up to a sight as beautiful as yours. With each morning came the reminder that you were the luckiest woman alive. No one else could start the day face-to-face with a sunkissed, sleeping Levi.

It was a side of him that no one else got to see and you woke up to it every morning, one of the countless perks of dating him. Typically straight bangs flopped across his face. Typically terse lips drifted apart in sleep. Typically stoic voice released the slightest of sleepy moans. Each morning, you took a few moments to take him all in.

Little did you know that he did the same to you each night. He watched your body rise and fall in breathing. He brushed the hair out of your face. He chuckled at your drooling and snoring. Before falling asleep, he would kiss your forehead, press your noses together, and sling an arm around your back. His moonlit routine.

This morning, though, your admiration was interrupted early. A fierce grip of both nausea and pain suddenly seized your insides. Just as you were about to reach a hand to his waist, you pulled it back to cinch your own.

The last thing you wanted was to wake your sleeping partner. The insomniac he was, he was always in desperate need of sleep. Gritting your teeth, you rolled onto your other side. With one particular stab of pain, you threw a hand over your mouth trying to muffle your reaction.

At the sound of your wince, Levi immediately shot up awake, “Huh?”

At the sight of your condition, he frantically gripped your shoulder, “Honey, what’s wrong?”

Through clenched teeth, your voice was faint, “It’s nothing. It’s nothing. I’m -” a sharp inhale, ”I’m okay.” The poor man was always under stress, you did not want to worry him with mere cramps.

However, your dismissal was anything but convincing. Careful breathing only worried him all the more. Words said you were fine. Body said you were not.

Pressing his front to your back, he became your big spoon. Hand caressed your side, up and down from hips to shoulder, repeatedly. Whether from the cuddling or the cramps, a round of chills flooded through you. At your twitch, Levi combed through your hair with his fingers, exposing your ear. You were a real trooper and he had seen you get tough many times before. Seeing you curled up in the fetal position, hearing your tiny whimpers, he was nothing short of terrified. _It must be really bad._

He pressed his lips to the cusp of your ear. His voice was often shaky in the mornings, but this was something more. It was not cracking from morning grog, it was breaking from concern. “What is it, babe?”

You had a feeling you knew what it was, but you had to make sure, and you did not want to check in front of him. An unexpected sight of blood in your pants, you could only imagine how much he would panic. “I have a guess, I’ll be right back.”

You swung your legs over the edge, continuing to clutch your side. As you stood from the bed, pain abruptly worsened, drawing another whimper from you.

Levi sat up hurriedly, “Do you need me to walk you there?”

He was far more worried than you were. You gave a playful tousle of his hair, attempting to calm him down, “I’m alright, I promise. I’ll be right back.”

At the door frame, you turned back to him. His attention vehemently on you, eyebrows arched in shock, mouth parted in concern. “Hey, Levi?”

“Yeah?” Clearly alarmed.

“Do you know if we have any chocolate?”

He blinked twice. _Did I hear her right?_ “Any _what?”_

Faced with his genuine anxiety, you had to chuckle to yourself, “Never mind. It’s nothing.”

It was obvious to him that you were smiling through the pain. Your acting skills had done little, if anything, to diminish his worries. As you left for the bathroom, he placed a hand to his forehead, _It’s certainly not nothing…_

// // //

_Yep, it’s happening._

Finding blood in your panties was both troubling and relieving. It would be a long week ahead, but at least it was only that. Nothing unfamiliar. Nothing too serious. Still, it was never easy, let alone any fun, to get your period.

First things first, no more staining your underwear. Your clean freak would not be too happy about that.

You pulled open the special drawer. Empty. _Oh no…_

You frantically searched every compartment, there was not a period product in sight. _Shit… did I really forget to restock last time?_

Hormones undoubtedly amplified the inconvenience. So frustrating. Not only did you have no products, the knife in your tummy was sharpening. Only one solution seemed right in your mind. You stripped yourself down and drew a hot bath.

// // //

 _Knock Knock._ “Come in!”

Finding you so relaxed in the tub, body sprawled out, eyes closed and smiling, Levi finally felt a tad of relief. It was a good call coming to check on you. He leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms, “So, you’re just constipated or something?”

You chuckled. Levi’s sense of humor, it had grown on you, “Nahh, not quite.”

He sat on the edge of the tub, “Figure out what it is?”

The two of you had been much more intimate many times before, but there was something about looking him straight in the eyes and saying it, you could not get yourself to do it. You could say, _Yes. My uterine lining is shedding because we didn’t make a baby._ Or you could just say, “It’s my shark week.”

The perplexion on his face illustrated: he was clearly not up to date with code talk. “What…?”

A deep breath and sigh. You had no choice but to be blunt, “I’m having my period.”

Any tinge of calm he felt was promptly washed away, “Shit…”

In his young age, Levi had experienced more than most ever would in their entire lives. However, helping someone through their period was an event he had yet to experience. He tried to hide it in his face, but in truth, he was absolutely clueless. Eyes scanned the bathroom for clues about your condition.

He had seen plenty of gore in his life, but blood in his girlfriend’s underwear was something different. It sparked both a primal instinct to protect you and also a tender pang in his heart. _I have to help her… My poor little thing…_

With sympathy in his eyes, he pet the top of your head, “What do you need me to do?”

“Umm, well…” _Why am I so nervous?_

Levi moved his hand to your shoulder, “Spit it out, I’ll do anything, no questions asked.”

In this moment, your eyes met in a mutual understanding: even though this was just your monthly cycle, he would always do whatever it took to help you in any circumstance, now and forever, today and every day.

 _God, I’m so in love with him…_ Voice caught in your throat, “I know it’s embarrassing, and that I should have bought them last time, but I’m stupid and forgot to…”

You held your knees to your body, “And it’s not fair that you’re always the one cleaning up after my carelessness, making up for my mistakes…” You ducked your head in your arms.

Levi raised his eyebrows. You were so emotional all of a sudden, laughing one minute, near tears the next. A tender hand massaged the back of your neck, “Hey, hey… don’t cry…”

But his calming techniques did not seem to work. Before he knew what happened, you were sobbing into your hands. It took him a moment to recognize, this was probably the work of hormones. You were not the one to randomly burst into tears. His tough cookie had been crumbled so quickly, _This is worse than I thought._

He was quick to size up a situation. Every drawer of the vanity was ajar, it looked like you had done a desperate search. It was clear to him: you were missing something you needed. Without a word, he understood what he had to do. While he wanted to tend to this weeping heap, no one could be happy with blood-stained panties.

Levi pushed aside some strands of wet hair, “I’ll be back before you know it, baby.”

// // //

He had said no questions asked when he left, but finding himself in the feminine aisle for the first time in his life, he sure wished you had given him some instructions.

It was surprisingly overwhelming. Faced with a whole aisle of unfamiliar products, he felt there had to be more you needed but had just failed to ask for. It was a miniature panic. Too many choices, not enough time.

He went in thinking he would just buy pads, but he had no idea there were so many kinds. Of course, there were many brands, but there were also many variations. Turning over the packages, he hoped to find instructions for the average clueless boyfriend. Instead, there were only pink and purple outlines of women playing soccer. _Tch… not helpful. Do they expect everyone to be born with this knowledge? Ridiculous._

 _Overnight?_ As far as he knew, the bleeding took no breaks, not even for sleeping. If they sold them, periods at night must be distinct from the day. He picked up a pack. 

_Wings or no wings?_ Blood could manifest in all different forms. Would it clot on top or spill over the sides? He picked up some with and some without.

 _Scented or unscented?_ He was all too familiar with the rancid smell of blood, but maybe unscented would be irritating on your skin. He picked up both kinds.

 _Light, medium, heavy flow?_ The blood he saw before sure looked like a lot. Come to think of it, any blood in underwear was already too much. He had no idea how to classify your “flow”. He picked up one of each.

But that was not all, there were also countless other products filling the aisle. Pain relievers, pH balanced soaps, heating pads. He picked up one of everything… just to be safe.

When the register rang up his total, eyes widened at the astronomical price.

 _What a bunch of bullshit._ Spending money on you did not bother him, in fact, he secretly loved spoiling you every once in a while. However, he never expected these basic medical supplies - no, necessities - to be so expensive. Having a period was no luxury, it should not be priced like one.

As the cashier counted his money, he caught a figure out of the corner of his eye. Some asinine punk poking fun at his purchase. Taking care of someone, let alone an angel like you, was nothing to be ashamed of. Levi met his mockery with a trademark glare, quickly disintegrating the smug smile.

 _Moron…_ Levi returned his gaze to the register, catching the glimpse of one last necessity.

“Hold on, add this on there too. With me, not in the bag.”

// // //

Fear of staining the couch came second to his surprise of your state. Black sweatpants, thick sweatshirt, no more tears, you seemed miles better than you had when he left.

He set the bags next to you, kissing your forehead, “You seem better.”

“Hah, I suppose you could say that.” An aching and ill-timed cramp, you smiled through it for him.

“What are you doing out here? I thought you didn’t have anything left.”

“You’re right, I don’t, but I had to get out of the tub.” If not so caught up in your well-being, your disregard for staining might have landed you a playful and punishing spank, courtesy of your clean freak.

“But- but…” He could not quite connect the dots, “what do you do when you have nothing?”

“Oh, you know, you just have to improvise.” When his posture beckoned for an explanation, you thought he deserved one, “I know some people use socks, towels, napkins… In a pinch, I personally resort to toilet paper.”

“So you’re saying…”

Embarrassed eyes. You merely nodded in affirmation.

Though you expected anger, he was only disheartened. No one should have to go through something like that, least of all someone like you. Levi made a mental note: he would never let you run out of supplies again.

“Well don’t worry. I got you some stuff.” Behind his plain expression, he was excited for your reaction. _I did such a good job, she doesn’t even know._

“That’s a lot of bags, what else did you buy?”

“What do you mean?”

Peeking in the bags, you bit back a laugh. He had bought every kind of pad under the sun. You counted 8 packs, at least 12 in each, that was… _nearly 100 pads!?_ He swore to himself he would never let you run out of pads, little did he know, he would not have to worry about it for quite a while. Keeping your smile tucked down, “Did you keep the receipt?”

If you had to go through this agony once a month, he felt paying for it was the least he could do. Picking up none of your amusement, “No, of course not. Don’t even think about paying me back.”

“Not that. This is… “ _way WAY too much stuff!_ The concerned look in his eyes, you could not get yourself to laugh at him. Changing your train of thought. “This is all too kind. Thank you, darling.”

He shoved his hands in his pockets, internally proud of himself. “Oh, I almost forgot. I got you breakfast, too.” He gave a simple toss of your favorite chocolate bar.

Mouth fell open at his kindness. Levi smiled, “Don’t think I don’t catch those things.”

// // //

Despite getting lost in the feminine aisle, Levi was actually an innate caretaker. Any sudden cramps, he would warm up the heating pad. Pain relievers were dosed out the minute you could take them. He was able to keep up with your hot takes as they jumped from topic to topic.

“Yeah, you’re right. They were totally out of line.”

“Yeah, you’re right. That book breaks my heart too.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Fried chicken is severely underrated.”

“Hey, Levi?”

“Yeah?”

“Speaking of which… how do you feel about take-out tonight?” A pleading smile, which you only whipped out on the most desperate occasions.

His pharmacy excursion had burned a hole in his wallet, but he did not even think about saying no to you. You always seemed to be putting yourself last on the priority list. Buying you a meal as your uterus bled out, it was the absolute least he could do.

Levi tousled your hair, _Goddamn she’s adorable._ “Sounds perfect.”

He even went out to get it for you, not bothering to ask if you wanted to come with or not. Given your exhaustion, it was painfully obvious that you would not be thrilled to get up and go somewhere. The selfless person you were, he knew that if he asked, you would do it anyways. 30 minutes later, you would be wondering what the hell you were doing so far from your heating pad.

As he wrote down your order, he internally chuckled at how much you wanted. Times like these, you ordered from the stomach, not from the mind. Times like these, he knew not to laugh about it. Just when he thought you had listed your last item, you surprised him with “and can I also get…” It was never ending. It was too cute.

With a soft rub of your tummy and a tiny kiss of the head, he was off to fetch your food, “Be back soon.”

Watching him head out for the second time today, amped emotions manifested from a laugh to a cry. Giggling or sobbing, you recognized: you really were the luckiest girl in the world.

// // //

When Levi came back with take-out, he was not at all surprised to find you fast asleep. Setting the food on the counter, he sauntered to the sofa. Chocolate on your face, hot pad on your abdomen, blankets on your body, he could not help but smile.

He could reheat the food anytime, this cute bundle in front of him, she would only visit him once a month. He seized the moment, joining you under the covers, once again pressing his body to your back.

A sleepy stir, “Mmm, L-Levi?”

“Shh, shh… Get some rest. Your body’s working hard.” Levi reached a hand around, scratching your back, attempting to lull you back to sleep.

You rolled on your side, this time facing him. A sudden and sleepy kiss on the lips. In your fatigue, he had predicted a simple peck. Instead, your tongue was relentless, hands explored all parts of his body, high-pitch moans met his mouth. _Well, this was unexpected. Is this “in heat”?_

Indeed, he looked perfect as ever. The sunset highlighted his already flawless features. Black bangs were coated in amber. Blue of his eyes contrasted the orange sky. Shadow of the angle outlined his muscle. _Oh my…_

It was not only his physical features, it was also the loving partner he was. All your friends seemed to have stories of their boyfriends’ poor attitudes during that time of the month. Trying to ignore them, not sympathizing with them, even going far as to say “eww” to their faces. Even though he was a neat freak, Levi never ever found you gross, to your face or not. You were the love of his life, how could he?

All of him was too good to be true. All you wanted was to let him know.

Eyes widened in shock, but at your passion, he was quick to reciprocate. In his thrill, he was careful with his affection. There was a lot he wanted to do to you, especially faced with this newfound lust, but least of all was hurt you.

You were in a lot of pain, he had been sent on multiple fetch quests, the day was not exactly easy. But with how extra cuddly and cute you were, he closed his eyes in content, maintaining the kiss through and through. 

_Maybe this isn’t so bad._


	12. Comfort through panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad memories are all too easy to come by. Good men are not. Levi is determined to change that.

These superficial fundraisers were no fun for anyone, they were nothing but a mandatory pain in the ass. For the Scouts to stay afloat, however, these formalities were necessary. Get dressed up, schmooze the businessmen, impress the emissaries. All these social skills directly manifested in enthused donations. 

While no one particularly enjoyed these “parties”, some could at least fake it till they made it. Hange had no shortage of information to share with anyone who had ears. Erwin had his ties with the higher-ups and was otherwise one for professionalism with his eloquent tongue. Miche had plenty of titan horror stories to entertain and wow the guests with. Everyone seemed to have something.

For Levi, though, there was no such thing as “faking it”. If there was one thing he could not do, it was pretending to be someone he was not. All Scouts knew he loathed interaction, especially with strangers. Unfortunately for him at these galas, he had attracted attention as if he was the guest of honor. The thug of the underground turned humanity’s strongest soldier, it was a transformation all wanted to hear, it was a tragedy he hated returning to. 

“Give us an updated titan kill count!” 

“No titan strong enough to take you down, huh?” 

“Growing up in that filth, you poor little thing.”

All the while patting him on the back and tousling his hair.

_Tch… idiots. Each and every one of you, all completely clueless…_

For you, maybe you could get through the night, if only it was not held in this dark ballroom where alcohol was in abundance. The sunset had gone by in an instant. It was too hard to see, let alone keep aware of, your surroundings in near pitch blackness.

Maybe it was the horde of strangers. Maybe it was the smell of booze. Maybe it was the uncertainty of the drink right in front of you. Maybe it was the unfortunately-timed memory. Whatever it was, you did not care, all you knew was that you needed out of there immediately. A familiar feeling was about to grip your entire being. A public display of hysteria would undoubtedly lessen the profits. The urgency you felt, however, you were leaving for your own good, utterly unconcerned with its effect on the others.

These events were mandatory, but you were leaving early. You could only hope that your superiors would show some sympathy. 

Maybe Levi would understand.

// // //

Indeed, as Levi watched you leave the function - taking down your up-do hairstyle and presumably leaving for the night - he made a conscious decision to let you go. It was a shame, he was hoping he could sneak away from these bureaucrats and chat with you at some point. Still, he harbored no anger, only envy and concern. Envy, as he wished he could leave too. Concern, as you were not a quitter. 

That was one thing he had learned about you over time, you were not a quitter. 

Through thick and thin, Levi only knew you to be a trooper. It was exactly what worried him when he saw you leave in such a hurry. _Something must be really wrong._

The endless flinging of questions from the crowd subconsciously droned as he thought of you. All the hazing he had given you in orientation, your slaying of a titan with impossibly dull blades, the time you broke your leg and wanted to venture the very next day… you were incredibly tenacious in the face of terror.

This function, while certainly annoying, was not as inherently terrifying as what he had seen you endure before. Seeing you run off so hurriedly panged his heart with worry, _I have to go check on her._

Certainly, it looked like no one else was going to do it. Besides, with the hold you unknowingly had on him, he had to reaffirm himself he was the best man for the job. He was the only one who would understand, maybe even the one you needed.

Levi released the trademark hold on his cup and excused himself from the conversation, deciding against a shit joke. He was careful to avoid any hint that he would return. If the night went well, he probably would not.

He had let you leave the event, but would still be chasing after you.

// // //

Slamming the door behind you, returning to your own room, neither brought you the relief you were in desperate search of.

Your fleeing from the event was so frantic, you only now realized that you had mistakenly taken your glass from the bar. The instinct to guard your drink was so vital, you had clutched it throughout the entire trip back to your room.

Fuck anything that dared to remind you of that time. With a scream and a stomp, you crushed the glass to pieces under your heel. It was irrational, irresponsible, inevitable. It was out of your control, the doing of an overwhelming stupor. 

With the shattering of the glass came the shattering of your composure. Your body, your movement, your reactions, you felt they were not your own. Lips twitched to a manic smile, tears rapidly fell down your face, yet you made no noise. Vision blurred, you slowly stumbled to your shower, leaving broken glass in your wake. 

// // //

Once out of sight from the party, Levi broke into a hurry for your quarters. As much as he hated that gala, he ran not to get away, he ran to get to you. 

Each step he took, he grew closer not only to you but also to anxiety. There was a speck of hope: maybe he would meet you in the halls, maybe you had only gone to powder your nose, maybe you were just fine. Each passing moment without you, that speck grew even smaller.

It felt like the longest trip ever. Finding your closed door was both relieving and worrying. He was happy to have located you as he had not ruled out the possibility of having to search, but he could only wonder about your state on the other side.

He instinctively lifted his hand to a fist but held himself back just as he was about to knock. If there was anyone who understood the necessity of solitude, it was Levi Ackerman. When it came to the typical soldier who had just had a rough day, he told himself they just needed to be alone. However, when it came to you, it was a challenge for him to keep the mindset. 

The urgency to tend to you was eating at his composure, yet he knew he had to ignore it, presumably for your own good. He crossed his arms, stared at the floor, and manned himself outside your door.

_Maybe she just needs time._

_Maybe she just needs space._

_Maybe she just needs…_

// // // 

For the entire time he stayed outside, Levi kept his senses diligent. Still, the only clue he picked up was the sound of running water which had been going on for some time. Come to think of it, perhaps a little too long. 

It was no longer merely a personal concern, it had become his duty as your captain to check on you. Ignoring you any longer would not only be a hazard, it would be a blatant violation of code.

The lack of response to his knocking was expected. The unlocked door was not. So as not to startle you, he slowly let himself into your unit. 

Levi shouldered off his suit jacket as he examined the room. First, he found your shoes scattered across the room. You must have kicked them off haphazardly. Next, the shards of glass. It seemed deliberately broken. Finally, the bathroom door ajar. The source of the water flow. 

Outside of the bathroom, he took a brief pause, preparing himself for what may lie on the other side. He had only ever seen you in tip-top shape. He had a feeling that pattern was about to be disrupted. Levi took a deep breath and slowly pushed the door open.

At last, he had found you, but neither of you felt any relief just yet.

// // //

It was almost as if you had a bird’s eye view of your circumstance. Certainly, if not for your hinging on the brink of dissociation, there was no way you could handle the setting.

Your captain had found you in the shower, his lips parted at the sight. Cold water poured down on you and your gown, you looked incredibly beautiful, incredibly sad. Without hesitation, he sauntered towards the tile. Without flinching, he joined you under the freezing stream. Grey button-down, black slacks and all. In both your formal garbs, the two of you sat together in an indoor downpour.

As close as he was, he left deliberate space between you. The last thing he wanted to do was startle you. If you wanted touch, he would provide. If you wanted touch, you would have to initiate. His only movement was a careful undoing of his tie.

This simple motion was the first step in bringing you back. His calm, his patience… you were starting to feel safe again. You watched your hands clasp around his bicep. Vision shifted as you placed your head on his shoulder, neck shaking invariably. Fingers held a hasty clutch of his arm as they went through spasms.

A few seconds, a few minutes, a few hours, neither of you were keeping track. He had stayed for so long, you were sure he was here to listen, however long it would take. 

Voice was a weak crack, “Levi, I…”

A turn of his head, despite the breaking of your voice and the crashing of water, his ears could only hear you clearly. Overlooking his burning concern and curiosity, he did not beckon for an explanation. Pressuring you, not only was he incapable, but the thought had never crossed his mind. The choice to open up was yours and yours alone. 

“I’ll never be clean…” A deep swallow, “I feel so dirty.”

Levi took a tender hold of your hand, when you seemed comfortable, he brought your fingers in front of him, “Here, let’s see.” 

Ever so softly, he examined your hand. Rotating your wrist, prying open your fingers, flipping from palm to back. He brought your digits to his chin, holding them there until he was sure it was fine. Finally, he lifted your hand an inch higher, giving each of your fingertips a brush against his lips.

As much as you wanted to, you could not bring your gaze to his. You were already completely overwhelmed, you were sure your eyes could not handle the view of your captain kissing your fingers. While the scene may have been too shocking to look at, you were more than in love with the sensation. You were more than in love with his presence. You were more than in love with him.

At the last of your fingers, he rested his head atop yours, continuing to twirl your hands, “If there was dirt, I’d see it, trust me.” 

A few more passing moments. Maintaining a polite gaze, he was captivated by the way the water fell on your body. Skin was sparkling. Dress was dazzling. Hair was shining. It was not only your physical features, as a matter of fact they came second, it was who you were on the inside. A compassionate, caring, and courageous young fighter. Always helping others, helping everyone but herself.

He lowered his voice to a gentle whisper, “To me, you’re always glimmering.”

You had gone through countless panic attacks in your time. Yet somehow, he instantly knew the sedative. He had said and done exactly what you needed, such that you were already calming down. _How does he do it?_

You leaned further into him. When you shivered violently, gaze fell vehemently on you, “You cold?”

A couple of nods against his shoulder, “Yeah…”

A careful pace, he lifted his arm from your grip for just a moment, reaching behind for the shower handle. He twisted the faucet until your shivers ceased. At just the right temperature, he returned his arm to your level. A delicate hand embraced your head against his neck. 

He held you.

And held you.

He held you.

And held you.

He held you.

And held you.

// // //

Your head leaning on his shoulder, sleepy snores falling on his ears, he fully acknowledged: he would not mind staying like this forever.

As comfortable as he was, he knew you would prefer a comforter of cotton over a blanket of water. Levi looped an arm around your back and tucked your knees together. Before getting up, he took one last good look at this beauty in front of him. Heart panged with realization: this heap in his arms, he would do anything for her. At last, he rose. Supporting you securely in a bridal style hold, he made for your bedroom.

Before he could lay you down though, you needed, no - deserved, real pajamas. This sopping wet gown would not do.

He sat you on your vanity. Two rubs of your shoulder, two calls of your name, “Hey, hey…”

“Mmm… Levi?” Eyes drifted half-open in sleep.

Levi caressed your cheek, “It’s me. It’s me. Don’t worry. We’re going to get you to bed, but first, you have to get out of this gown, okay?” 

Already, you were nodding off again. He was on edge, but still found you all too adorable. He snapped back, “Stay with me. Only a little more…”

One hand keeping you upright, the other pulled open drawers until finding your pajamas. He grabbed two large tees, two loose shorts. He pulled the shirt over your head, shorts to your knees. 

He had gotten you this far, he just needed a little something from you, “We’re almost there, hun. I promise I won’t look, can you just take off your dress?” 

Given your prior state, he had expected a resurgence of panic. After all, you had kept your gown on in the shower for some reason. Your calm compliance came as a pleasant surprise.

As you reached your hands to your neck, unclasping the halter, you smiled. It was the first one he had seen from you all night, “Thanks for your help, Levi.”

Pulling your shorts past your hips, shirt past your waist, you reached out your hand, “One last favor?”

He met your hand, “Anything.” He truly meant it.

“Tuck me in, please?”

// // //

With his care and attention, you had been completely transported from a cold shower to a warm bed. No one else would have or could have done it, certainly not yourself, certainly not on your own.

As much as he wanted to join you in there, keep you safe and protected throughout the night, be there to cuddle you through any nightmares… he recognized that waking up to a someone you had not remembered lying next to was the absolute last thing you needed.

But if you woke up with night terrors, feeling all alone through them… he was not sure he could live with that idea.

There was one solution. After all, you did have a couch. 

He flung his dripping-wet suit over your shower rod. With optimism, it may dry by morning. Staring at these impromptu pajamas, he could not help but chuckle to himself. Getting into your pants, this was not exactly what he had in mind. As he stepped into a pair of your shorts, he understood just how hopelessly in love with you he was.

_I’ll do absolutely anything for you._


	13. Car Sex (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Punishment, Reader, Levi himself all cannot wait to get home.

**WC: 3700 words TW: smut, bondage**

_He could not wait to get home..._

After much eagerness from your end and curiosity from their end, Levi had no choice but to oblige: he was going to introduce you to Erwin and Hange. He had been putting it off and making up excuses for a while, but with pressure from both sides, he finally gave in and made the reservation for dinner. It was not that he was embarrassed of you, he was absolutely in love with you, he just did not feel the need to share it with everyone. With how much care and attention you put in to looking presentable for the occasion, he felt a hint of reassurance. _Maybe this will be fine after all._

While you were put-together on the outside, you were extremely anxious on the inside. On the drive there, in your pristine makeup and dress, a nervous energy started to course through you. There was an overwhelming pressure to make a good impression for these two important people in his life. 

The time had finally come. When you arrived at the restaurant, Levi held the door open for you. Immediately, you found them waiting at the table. Not only that, but you made direct eye contact right away. The nervous energy and pressure to perform only built up even further. If you did not lighten the mood, you would not make it through this dinner. 

As soon as you both took your seats, you reached under the table to put a hand on his thigh. It was a habit you relied on to keep you grounded. It was a habit he adored. What he did not adore, however, were the deviant steps you took further. 

You were not even subtle. When he cracked a wise one, you diminished it by tousling his hair and mocking, “Isn’t he cute?” When the food arrived, you insisted he try your entreé, only to move the fork away from his mouth and make childish airplane noises. That was not even the worst of it. Whenever he was asked a question, you crept an invasive hand further up his thigh. His voice grew more and more flustered. Answers grew less and less coherent. It was an uncouth way to undermine his severity.

Levi grit his teeth and muttered, “Would you knock it off?”

Pretending not to hear him, you jumped your grip from his hip to his torso and tensed, your hand forming into a claw.

Nervous energy manifested into confident foolishness, “Have you ever seen him laugh, you guys? It’s the cutest thing!” Sensing what you were about to do, Levi abruptly stood from the table. _That’s it. She’s had her chance._

Before you could get to tickling him in public, Levi slammed an indistinct handful of cash on the table and grumbled, “You’ll have to excuse us.”

Hange’s eyes widened, “Wh-Where are you going? We practically just sat down!”

“We must be leaving now.”

Hange debated, “But why!?”

Before he could say the same about you, you flipped his own joke on himself, “Levi is constipated, it seems.”

Erwin tried to hide his chuckle, politely biting his lip and choking down a cough. On the other hand, Hange was practically whooping and slapping their knees in laughter. The scene drew even more attention from the restaurant - to Levi’s grim dismay.

As Levi already had one foot out the door, Hange hollered after him, “We like her already!”

// // //

Levi slammed the car door shut. Quickly jutting the car in reverse, he snapped his gaze to you, “What the hell has gotten into you?”

“Oh, come on, Levi! It’s good to let loose every once in a while!” You kicked your feet up, dirtying the dashboard and thus - unknowingly - irritating him all the more.

He cringed at the smudge, “Does that ‘every once in a while’ have to be in public? During a dinner with friends? Your first time meeting them?”

You placed a playful hand on his shoulder and threw some sass, “I thought you said you didn’t have friends.” 

_Tch. Shitty brat…!_ This juvenile attitude was not appealing to him, it was only annoying him. He swatted your hand away, “If you know what’s good for you, you’re going to knock it off.”

With your newly freed hand, you rustled his thigh, “Well, what if I don’t?”

Levi took a deep breath, _Hmph. That’s that._ _She doesn’t know what’s good for her._ You were not your normal self. He kept his gaze vehemently on the road and sighed. Until he could straighten you out, he would just have to ignore you. 

Caught up in your carelessness, you failed to realize: Levi was practically flooring it. You were being taken on a detour. He could not wait to get home.

// // // 

By now you should be back home. Instead, you found yourself in an absolutely unfamiliar location.

Levi had driven you to an abandoned lot surrounded by nothing but forest. The night was nearing pitch black, the sun was setting, and the full moon would soon be your only light. It was your own little haven, though not necessarily a safe one.

Attempting to orient yourself, you looked out each window. You wondered aloud, “What are we doing here?”

“Well, brat...” Levi put the car in park and unfastened his seatbelt.

When you reached to your own buckle, he placed a firm hand atop yours, prohibiting your release, “If you are going to turn a blind eye to consequences…”

In one swift motion, Levi swung his legs to the sides of your hips, one crossing the center console, one sandwiched between your hips and the door, “...then so am I.”

_What?_

When your lips parted in confusion, he kept you silenced with his own. _No time for questions._

Strong hands tangled themselves into your hair, gripping tightly. In control of both your tilt and his, he could get any angle he wanted. He tugged your head this way and that way, allowing him to explore all parts of your mouth. This kiss was carnal and calculated. 

Each time you thought he was about to pull away, he surprised you with his next move. Teeth continuously bit your lip. When you flinched at the sting, he always relieved you with a swipe of his tongue. In your shock, you tried to reciprocate, but Levi Ackerman’s makeouts were paralleled by none. 

His tongue swiped the outside of your lips before trailing down your jawline and neck. Levi lingered at sensitive spots, sucking love marks along the way. As he pulled from your trembling body, he wiped away saliva with his thumb, “Hmph, look at that… you’re bruising already.”

Your mouth twitched, trying and failing to come up with a response. At your silence, you could have sworn you caught the hint of a smirk. 

Levi reached a hand down beneath your passenger seat and lifted the metal bar below. He pushed off his feet, thus pushing your chair back. A slight whiplash as your backrest crashed into the second row of seats. 

With enough room between your feet and the dash, Levi knelt down in the space below. Strong hands reached up your dress. 

Your voice hushed, “L-Levi! What are you doing?”

Between kisses against your thighs, he muttered into your softness, “Don’t you know what I’m doing?”

When he ducked his head underneath your skirt, kneading your panties and licking your skin, the sensation was overwhelming. You gasped, “Someone might - ” A breathless inhale, “Someone might see us!”

The draft of his chuckle made you twitch, “Maybe they’ll see _you…”_

That’s right. Only you were visible from the outside. Between your knees, underneath both your skirt and the dashboard, Levi was hidden safe from any potential spotters. Anyone looking through the windows would find only you and your increasingly aroused state. _Shit…_

There was your safe word you could rely on, Levi would always respect it, but there was also an increasing desire building within you. The choice was utterly yours: did you want it to stop or start?

Levi sensed your being on the brink of decision which only pushed him to work even harder. Instead of tugging your panties down, he ripped them off. Instead of just light kisses, he added licks and bites. Instead of accepting the angle he had, he lifted the backs of your knees over his shoulders, giving him full exposure to all of you. 

In your rising heat, logic was melting away. The fear of getting caught and the anticipation of receiving pleasure, the former paled in comparison. A scan out the window, the only figures nearby were the towering trees. A glance down to your lap, Levi Ackerman was preparing to eat you out.

Faced with your naked lower half, he gave a few teasing pants, awaiting your decision. It was as if your body was deciding for you, ignoring any sense of right and wrong. Two devious hands caressed his undercut. Just as you were about to pull his head that last distance, he dove in on his own. _She’s more than consented. She’s commanded._

With that, he went to work. He was well-versed in the area and liked to remind you of it, especially at times when it seemed you had forgotten just how capable he was. Summer heat blended with your taste, making him salivate all over you. Tongue quickly plunged past your folds, outlining each and every one of your curves. The pleasure was wet and wild in every sense of the word. 

Speeds changed at all the right times, in all the right places. Slow licks from front to back. Fast flicks at your top. He dragged his tongue from one end to another. When he reached your crest, he unleashed all his pent-up energy directly onto your clit. Rinse and repeat. It was a precise pattern that never failed to excite, both of you in fact. Your low groans of pleasure as he licked your sides, high-pitched screams when he played with your pearl, he would never get enough of them. The pleasure he derived from your vocals had him moaning along with you, into you.

With each repetition, your anticipation for release was less and less containable. All you wanted was to grind into his mouth and get what you knew you needed. However, the seat belt clasped your hips and torso. Your control was constricted. There was little, if anything, you could do to manipulate the movements. You were truly receiving, only receiving, exactly how Levi wanted it.

Fingers grazed the insides of your thighs so lightly, you questioned if the touch was real or just your imagination. Meanwhile, his mouth was so hungry for you, there was no denying his presence. Any attempt to ground yourself was futile. This new angle, his shoulders supporting your lower body, it was a newfound treat you would undoubtedly have to ask for again. 

Clean bangs tickled relentlessly. Strong nose angled into your curves. With your thin cotton blocking the view, you could only imagine how he looked down there. 

Underneath the skirt of your dress, the temperature was stifling. Slightly breathless, Levi’s panting was music to your ears. Between breaths, he checked on you, groaning, “Having fun up there?”

_A little too much fun._ In fact, you were already nearing your peak. 

Eyes half-shut in pleasure, you had not been such a great look out. However, your attempt was about to get even more pitiful. When Levi sensed your approaching climax, he made his move, the one that always seemed to get you there. Instantly, your eyes squeezed completely shut.

_“Oh! Le- Levi!”_

“Mmm, yeah? What is it?” _Such a fucking tease._

“I’m gon’na… _gonna…!”_

But it was already happening. You could not pinpoint what it was - the threat of exposure, the thrill of the setting, the thirst of your provider - you did not care; the orgasm was distinct from any one you had ever had before. _He sure knew what he was doing._

A tickle that irritated just enough, just right, pulled the trigger you were searching for. Intense waves crashed throughout your entire body. Your entire being thrashed in place. If not for your makeshift bondage, you were sure you would have sunk out of your seat. A warm honey poured through you and into his mouth.

When you came on his face, he drank all of you in. With each pulse of your pussy came a thirsty swallow, cyclically compounding the climax. Sensation would never end if he kept this up, and he intended to. Neither of you would mind.

Countless cries of curses. Countless calls of his name. Finally, he had sucked out the last of you. Coming down from your high, his dirty talk still had you shivering, “mmm… you taste good.” _Holy fuck, he’s a natural._

With you all cleaned up, he pulled himself out from underneath your dress at last getting a glimpse of your sorry state. _A sight for sore eyes._

With the seat belt tightly constraining your chest, one breast was squeezed, the other was uplifted. Bright red blush across your face clashed with your attempt to appear composed for any potential audience. Upper body heaved in slow deep breaths as your lower body twitched through the last of its convulsions. 

While you were completely incapacitated, Levi looked calm and collected. He was deliberate and careful in licking his fingers clean of your cream. No matter how turned on he felt inside, his stern expression showed no signs. If not for the flush on his face and sweat in his hair, one never would have guessed he had just sucked the soul out of you. 

_Opposites attract._

// // //

At last, he had set you free. A click of that red button and you were quick to crawl all over him. You dragged him to the backseat, yearning for a second act. 

It was your own mistake. You assumed, now that you were out of that passenger seat, that you were back in control. His plan was the complete opposite.

You reached a hand to his crotch, delighted at the length and solidity you discovered, but your stay was not welcome. Levi instantly snatched your wrists and yanked them above your head.

“Ah ah ah…” He warned, “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I - I just…” He raised an eyebrow, “I just wanted to have some fun…”

A sinister chuckle, “I’ve let you have your fun today… maybe a little too much.” He pressed up into you, forcing your back against the car door.

You pled your case, “I promise I -”

He merely ignored you. As one hand gripped your wrists, the other reached for one of three seat belts in the backseat, “There’s no telling what you’ll do when left to your own devices.”

Levi effortlessly knotted your hands above your head, using the all-too-convenient polyester. Up until now, this car sex excursion had felt spontaneous. When he promptly tied one foot to the driver’s seat and the other to the back seat, it all seemed so perfectly planned. You began to wonder, _Just how long has he had this in mind?_

And there you were, in a matter of seconds, completely sprawled out and completely tied up across the backseat of the car. Right when you anticipated regaining some command, you were subdued with absolute bondage. _Hah. What was I thinking?_ Levi took a second to admire his creation, internally deciding he would have to do this again sometime. 

Levi leaned forward and caressed your cheek in his hand. Pulling your ear to his lips, he whispered, “You’ve been up to no good today.” His voice was exceptionally cool in double meaning. Fluids instinctively flowed down your thighs. 

Quickly, you realized, the simple standard wear of the seat belt from before was nothing compared to the organized chaos of ropes you found yourself in now. You had it easy earlier, only unable to move your hips. Now, your hands, arms, legs, were all anchored to the interior. Whatever his plan was, you could only accept it. He yanked your sweetheart down past your breasts and hiked your skirt up past your hips. _Nguhh… holy shit._

Levi was deliberate in undressing himself. Instead of taking off his shirt, he only unbuttoned the front, exposing his immaculate chest and abdomen. Instead of taking off his pants, he only unzipped the essential area, releasing his sprung and dripping-wet cock. He displayed all of your favorite parts, but you felt far more naked than him.

Levi hovered over your shaking body. Grinding his hips against yours, he spoke under his breath, “Tell me if someone’s coming, alright?”

A hesitant twitch of your cheek, “Me or someone else?” 

In your breathlessness, a serious tone was mistaken for further sarcasm. Levi bit his lip. _So she’s not straightened out yet… playful little thing..._

No explicit answer to your supposed deviance, only a harsh bite of your nipple. When your mouth gaped, he made sure to sheathe into you at that exact moment. With precise timing, there was no way you could muffle the moans, he longed to hear them, needed to hear them.

His naked chest lay atop yours. Fingers gripped the ceiling handle. The other hand caressed your neck. Soles of his shoes planted against the car door, giving him extra leverage to plow himself into you - _hard hard hard._

With how much he licked you earlier and how much precum he dripped now, it was the slickest sex you had ever engaged in. The copious blend of your juices drew shocked and sensationalized gasps from both of you. No need for warm-up thrusts, he could already pump in and out as fast as he wanted. Without hesitation, he did. 

While Levi loved domination and how good it looked on him, he was quickly losing hold of his composure. Your cunt was so good to him, too good to him. Velvety wet muscle devoured his whole. The pleasure was overwhelming, as well as the view. The princess beneath him made his jaw drop. Your sweet and flowery sundress contrasted the feverish flush of your breasts and desperate thirst in your face. All tied up, momentum from his thrusts could only surge and expel through your tits. They bounced like fucking crazy, drawing shameless sounds from the both of you.

He grit his teeth, trying to maintain that last thread of temper, “Anyone close?” _A double entendre._

You wanted to throw back a witty response. Even more though, you wanted to release all over his cock. In hopes of the latter, you abandoned your beloved teasing and abandoned all thought. Your response was one-track, “It feels!... I - I think!...”

_Tell me._ A ferocious, unforgiving thrust of his length.

“I’m close! I’m close!”

You sensed there was something missing, that you both needed something more. Perhaps selfish, you needed release now: not because you were having sex in public, not because each passing second was a potential moment of getting caught, but because... 

_I’m his... She’s my… horny fucking slut._

There was not much, perhaps only one thing, you could do. With all your might, hands desperately pushed against the window, trying to get that last depth you both needed. 

The desperate attempt succeeded. Your unexpected motion titillated him at last. What he unknowingly needed was something he had not prepared for: that tenacity of yours. While he punished you for it, he was helpless in the face of it, he was cumming because of it. With one hand at your breast, one hand in your hair, his hips took over with a mind of their own. At last, both of you were out of control. 

Thrusts came at a rapid pace, causing waves of pleasure to do the same for both of you. 

_Too fast. Too fast. Too - !_ Levi clamped his teeth around your neck, moaning against your skin. Just as that last push of yours was what he needed, this shaky exhale on your neck was what you needed. 

With each pulse of his dick came a thirsty swallow from your pussy. You wanted all of him, all the way back into you, as far back as he could go. You could never, would never, get enough of him. For the second time in this car ride, you found yourself shuddering through an unbelievable climax. Tongue stumbled over his name, inhales, exhales, and overstimulated shrieks. In all the sex you had, his performance never failed to surprise you. In all the orgasms he had given, your reactions never failed to delight him. Truthfully, you never let each other down.

Perfect timing, you cried simultaneously, “I’m coming!”

_Oh, fuck…_ Screaming was a regular for you, but not exactly for your partner. The desperation and urgency in Levi’s voice, you were sure you could get off just from the sound of it… but you had it even better. His cock was more than engorged, you could feel it seizing up and releasing into you. Heart beat hard and fast against yours. Breathless repetitions of your name, curses, _hah_ s and _ahh_ s fell upon your ears and against your neck, seemingly endless. _Actually, I don’t mind if this lasts forever._

With how good he sounded, you just had to peek. A deep red across his face was comprised of the summer heat and his arousal. Bangs he had so carefully combed earlier flattened into his vision and plastered onto his forehead. His body was glimmering in his sweat and your steam. A once polite outfit had been soaked through, unintentionally sexualized. You smirked, _Isn’t that everything about him, though? Effortlessly sexy. Always._ You would not have it any other way.

By now, the sun had set. Your body coated in purple twilight, his backlit in orange glow. As both of you quelled your trembling and regulated your breathing, you internally agreed to yourselves: you would both find excuses to make this a routine.

// // //

As Levi looked over his shoulder to reverse, he spotted your hasty handprint from earlier, still lingering on the window in steam. To say it made him proud would be an understatement. With you sound asleep in back, he allowed himself a smirk. Nevertheless, he recognized, a car wash was long overdue.

_Maybe tomorrow. The two of us. In the hot summer sun. Again and Again._


	14. After the 57th

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The death of the Levi Squad has the lone surviving leader in a rut, one Reader is determined to lift him up from, one Levi is determined to stay in.

**WC: 3600 words  
Tags: angst turned fluff, hurt-comfort, sfw**

_You were one, perhaps the only one, to notice his absence._

The 57th. 

Even on the retreat back to the walls, you knew it was an expedition that would live in infamy. An utterly failed objective. The first appearance of that strange new Female Titan. The countless lives lost, including the entire Levi Squad, were all single-handedly her doing.

Everyone recognized that, except one person. 

His absence was glaringly obvious to you, seemingly not to anyone else. Levi usually spent a lot of time on his own, but this was something more. That first evening, mess was practically empty at dinner. As days went on, people started to regain their composure and appetites. Those who thrived in the comfort of camaraderie ate in the dining halls. Those who healed in isolation took meals back to their rooms, but Levi was not even doing that.

Each meal since that fateful day, you stayed in the cafeteria from open to close for all hours of service, just to check if he was getting a meal. One day. Two days. Three days. No sign of him. With the skimpy salaries of soldiers, even the higher-ups, there was no way to afford meals from outside for this long. Not only did he never show up, you never saw someone take a second meal back. All these signs, you started to wonder, _Is he not even eating?_

The realization immediately placed an image in your mind and a pain in your heart. Your beloved captain, hiding in his room, starving inside, all alone… the thought was far too much to bear, far too sad to sit with. 

It was obvious to you that he was taking it the hardest. He was the leader. The group was named for him. It was no stretch for him to assume responsibility for their deaths, no matter how wrong you knew that idea was. 

Days gone by. His mind would not change on his own. No one else would go to convince him. It had to be you, and you were eager to do it.

// // //

It was not that you had the right words. It was not that you had any confidence. Today was the day only because you knew he needed help, he was not getting it otherwise, and you just could not stand the thought any longer. 

That evening, you took a long shower, reciting the plan once more in your head. First, you would make yourself nice, clean, and presentable for him. The sudden appearance of a dirty recruit would certainly do more harm than good. Next, you would cook your prized expensive meat and brew your saved black tea. It was a meal he would be hard-pressed to refuse, unlike the regular free grub in mess. Sure, your parents had sent it for you, but you knew someone who needed it more. The orphan he was, he had no family to mail him those treats. 

You paused in your planning to clutch your forehead, his situation was too sad no matter how you looked at it. But it was no time for you to get down, frankly, you felt you did not have the right to. Your losses, you had none compared to him. 

After cooking, you would hurry to his quarters, making sure the meal was still hot. You even made a note to yourself to knock quietly so as not to startle him. If he did answer, you would tell him that you would do anything to help. If he did not answer, you would leave a letter that said the same.

It was all so thoughtfully planned, there was no way it could go wrong.

// // //

In front of his door, an overwhelming nervousness finally began to take form. You were really there. You were really doing this.

_Just stick to the plan._

You balanced the tray on one hand and knocked on his door with the other. Two soft ones to start.

No answer.

Two more for good measure.

No answer. 

_Well, to be expected._ No response was a shame, but you had prepared for it. In your plan, no answer meant setting the tray out his door and leaving a note. Just as you started kneeling towards the floor, the door opened just a crack. You peered through the sliver. There he was, dark and sullen, staring down at your awkward position. 

His voice was quiet and stern, “What do you want?”

You froze on the inside, shivered on the outside, “I… umm… I…”

“Get off the ground.”

“R-Right.” It would be naive to assume he would welcome you with open arms or a smile on his face, but he was behaving colder than you expected, worse than he ever had before.

And he looked that way too. Clothes were wrinkled as all hell, as if he had been wearing them for days on end. _Wait… has he been? That can’t be…_ His hair was matted and sleek. He smelled fine, but he appeared as though he had not showered in days. Perhaps he had been covering up with deodorant and cologne. The clean freak you knew was utterly unrecognizable. 

He pushed the door a tad wider, preparing to chew you out, but you mistook the opening door as an invitation inside. 

Optimism could be the death of you.

// // //

Levi did not protest your entrance, but he did not look too thrilled either.

Upon entering his room, evidence of his depression was only compounded. There was dust everywhere. He was neglecting not only his duties, but also his favorite hobbies. Sheets were crinkled. He had been spending too much time in bed. Dirty teacups but no other dishes. He was drinking, not eating. 

A home-cooked meal was the right call. Though he had not ordered it, he definitely needed it.

You gestured the tray towards him, “Captain, I -”

He interrupted, “Levi.”

“Sorry?”

“Call me Levi.” 

“Yes,” you cleared your throat, “Levi.” You had no understanding of why he was correcting you. Little did you know, he felt unfit, downright unworthy, of that title.

He crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow, “Well?”

 _God, he’s intimidating._ You swallowed your stuttering, “I made you this dinner. There’s some sirloin, black tea, and - “

“I don’t want it.”

The first roadblock in your plan. With all the care and attention you put into the meal, you thought there was no way he could turn it down. You were caught completely off-guard.

“Are you sure? It’s still hot and -”

“Did you hear me, brat?” 

He turned his back to you, returning to his sunken bed. As he faced the other way, you set the tray of food on his desk. Maybe he would pick at it eventually. 

It was there you noticed even more troubling signs. Underneath his desk: a trash can overflowing with tissues. On top of his desk: four manila folders with all-too-familiar names. The Levi Squad’s personal files. You bit down on your knuckle, muffling a whimper. It was all too sad, but you did not come here to break down in front of him.

You averted your gaze from the desk to his state. He had laid back on his bed, elbow over his eyes, deep sighs from the depths of his lungs. You had a feeling he had been this way for the better part of the last week. A pitiful sight.

When the corners of his lips started to quiver, you thought it best to proceed with the next step. You crept closer to his bunk and offered, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

His quivering abruptly stopped with a clear of his throat. Voice remained weak. Tone remained terse. “No.”

He had not lifted his arm from his eyes, his vision still blocked. He could not care less if you were here or not, with a meal or not, offering help or not. You stood still for a few moments. The plan you had rehearsed over and over again was quickly disintegrating from memory. _What do I do now?_

Perhaps moments like these did not call for a plan. In fact, approaching grief like it was a problem to solve with distinct steps… maybe it did more harm than good. It was obvious that your methodology was failing so far. The only solution left was to read the situation as it unfolded, act from within, speak from the heart.

Suddenly, it all seemed so simple. _Just be yourself._

You approached further, “Levi…” you reached a hand to his shoulder. His entire body harshly flinched at the motion.

He grit his teeth, “What are you doing?” Tone harsh and unforgiving.

 _He’s traumatized, but I can sympathize._ “I… I lost friends too.”

He shoved your hand off of him, “Listen.” His voice was morphing into a snarl, “If you’re looking for help, you’ve come to the wrong person.”

“No, I…” _I’m not looking for comfort._ “I came here to…” _help you._ Past grit teeth, the corner of his lip twitched at your stalling. “I came here to help you.”

Levi slammed his hands on the edge of the bed and snapped up. He growled, “You know what, brat? There is one thing you could do to help me.”

In all your innocence, you wanted to reply, _Anything. I’ll do anything for you._ In all your experience, you knew your naive response would be inappropriate. Your sincerity would be squandered by his sarcasm. Your mouth flinched as you tried and failed to formulate a response.

He pressed you further, “It would be a huge help…”

You felt tears prick your eyes, fully understanding what was coming next, “What is it?”

Bangs shadowed his face, eyes dragged up through half-shut lids, a once neutral line distorted into a harrowing scowl. “It would be a huge help if you got the hell out of here.”

Your eyes started to sting and redden. _Don’t cry. Don’t cry._

You backed away from his bed and towards the door. Still, he continued to reprimand you, “Nothing would be better actually!” Volume was rising sharply.

Legs of jelly, heart thumping out of your chest, hands shaking, you somehow managed to grab hold of the doorknob. As you held it, you could not get your fingers to twist. You were in complete and utter shock. _This is how the night ends?_ Your body could not seem to accept it. One last look back, just to make sure he really - 

“Go!” Levi flung his arm out, violently shooing you away.

You snapped your gaze away and left in a panic. The instant you pulled the door shut was the instant hot tears gushed down your cheeks.

Anything to make him feel better.

// // //

Once again, days went by without any sight of each other. This time, you were nowhere to be seen. This time, you were hiding from him. This time, the roles had been reversed.

The instant you left that night, the instant he heard your cries outside his door, he knew that he had done wrong. Immediately, he began to wonder how to fix it. Days and weeks later, he still had not figured it out. All he knew was that he could not carry this guilt any longer. Tonight, he was going to try his hardest to make it up: make it up to the innocent, pure, well-meaning comrade who deserved none of what he had done, who deserved nothing but the best. 

He could only try his best.

The same tray you had brought to him that day, a well-rehearsed plan, the innate confidence he was born with - despite all this - he found himself nervous outside of your room. Arriving at your bunk, he questioned his entirety, _Tch… What the hell am I doing?_

He reached a fist to your door, preparing to knock, but was interrupted by a lurking Hange, “She’s not there.”

Even more nervous, he stumbled in denial, “No, I… Wh - ?” _What makes you think I - ?_

“She’s sick.”

His mouth stayed agape, unsure of what to say, “An infected wound.”

Hange answered his last unspoken question, “The infirmary.”

He shook his head. The secret was out, he could only accept it, “Thanks.”

// // //

You woke up to two light knocks on the door. Fresh out of sleep, weak from the pain, your voice was merely a crack, “Come in.” 

Bright light flooded your room as he opened the door. You shielded your eyes as they adjusted to the light. It took a few moments and a few harsh blinks to recognize your caretaker. It was the one you had been avoiding for days and weeks on end. _No, not him…_

You pulled your sheets over your face, hiding yourself, “What are you doing here?”

He spoke softly, “I heard someone’s sick.”

As he came closer, your body instinctively began to tremble, “No, I’m fine. I’m fine! Please…” you winced, “go tell Hange that I don’t need any help.”

Instead of turning back, he did the opposite. Levi maintained his steady pace as he continued towards you, “It doesn’t look that way.”

He stood at the side of your bed and set the tray on your nightstand. When you flinched at the motion, he froze, “You don’t have to take care of me, Levi.”

His eyebrows tilted upward. You seemed more than just apprehensive, you seemed absolutely terrified of him. The fear in your eyes was heart-wrenching, even to him, “Just…” another stab in your side, “Just get someone else to do it. You can make someone cover for you.” 

He came in with the intention to simply take care of you, but he immediately sensed he would have to get more intimate than that, “No, I…” He crossed his arms, “I asked to be here.”

Confusion piled on to worry, “… But why?”

Levi bit his lip He never could have predicted how difficult this would be. It all seemed simple when he drew it up in his head, but faced with the innocent and anxious patient in front of him, it was anything but easy. The worry in your eyes forced him to look out the window. _How do I explain this? What AM I doing here?_ Arms crossed, slightly jostling, his only answer was a stammer.

You interrupted his pause with a hazy whimper, “I thought you hated me.”

At your confession, Levi was crushed. You caught only a glimpse of his sorrow before your eyes fluttered shut. Then, darkness.

// // //

When you asked him why he came to help, he wished he had more time to articulate his answer. Now that you were passed out, he loathed each extra minute that went by. It was one more moment that you thought he hated you, one more moment he could not convince you otherwise. 

He had since sat down at the foot of your bed. Words were useless in your deep sleep, he would have to rely on other acts of kindness. 

First, he pulled back the sheets and examined your abdomen. The bandaged wound looked like it was well on the mend. The infection must be the thing keeping you here. A delicate hand on your bandages, he scanned the room. Ice pack, tea, tissues, ibuprofen… all signs of a fever. He looked back to you, watching you shudder and sweat in your sleep. _A fever with chills at that._

The more he searched the room, the more disorder he found. Ice pack had melted, tea cups were dirty, tissues were scattered. This would not do. Sometimes he felt he was the only Scout who gave a damn about their work, the only one who gave their all in every task, all the way down to manning the infirmary. Never mind that, though, that was not what bothered him now. What got to him, frustrated him, was that anyone would leave you in a mess like this, especially given your sickness.

And so, he went to work. 

A cold bag of ice, a freshly-brewed cup of tea, an emptied-out trash and a fresh box of tissues. He figured this tidying up was the simplest step of the caretaking ahead.

He initially wanted to make you a nice warm meal, but his ineptitude in the kitchen prevented it. It was the first time he was ever grateful for his lack of cooking skills. By now, a hot meal would have turned cold as you were still fast asleep anyways. His simple PB&J could stand the test of time. A glimmer of pride.

With your room now in tiptop shape, he could now only wait. He could not leave. He could not stir. He could only stay and watch you sleep, which was not as boring as it sounded. He loved you after all.

Yes, as he watched your body rise and fall, heard you snore and sniffle, felt you move underneath his hand, he could not help but acknowledge it: he was in love with you. He was aware of his feelings long before today. In fact, the day he realized he loved you was the same day you reckoned he hated you. That night, as he stayed up in an insomniac bout, he at last understood the kind of person you were. You were a thoughtful, caring, selfless individual. You came to him in his time of need, without having been asked to, when no one else would. You were the only one to find him and reach out to him, even attempting to comfort him. A nearly impossible task that he had to commend you for. You stood out among all soldiers and all scouts. You stood out among everyone. 

He could only anticipate telling you.

// // //

Seemingly an eternity, seemingly five minutes, had passed. At last, you were waking up.

The bright afternoon sun was setting. The room was basked in a warm orange glow, and so was he.

Levi sat at the foot of your bed with a solid hand on your calf, “You awake?”

You rubbed your eyes, accidentally wondering aloud, “Is this just a dream?”

He bit back a mocking, “No, no… This is real.” He paused, “Do you need to sleep more? Sleep as much as you need to.”

“No, I…” A familiar headache was impending, “I need…” _This migraine! It hurts to even talk._

“You need medicine?”

You held your head and nodded.

He rose from the bed and made for your nightstand. After all that time faced with your cute sleeping self, his anxiety from before had gradually melted away. Suddenly, he knew there was nothing to be afraid of. If he acted from his heart, there would be no need to act. 

He grabbed the sandwich, a glass of water, and a dosage, “You have to eat first.”

You reached for them with shaky arms. He could not help but grimace at your weakness. Someone like you did not deserve to feel misery like this. His sadness soon dispersed, however, when he watched you take a hungry bite of his food. Maybe it was just because you were beyond ravenous, but you seemed to enjoy it. He decided against holding back a smile, which you immediately picked up on. Suddenly, you found him far from intimidating.

He placed a hand to your forehead, “You’re hot.”

It took you a second, “Yeah, I… it’s an infection.”

“A fever?” His hand still on you, you shuddered at his touch, “With chills, huh?”

Mockingly perfect timing, you snapped your head to the side, a polite sneeze into your elbow, “R - Right…”

Just as polite, he blessed you and brought a tissue to your nose. He could not seem to keep his hands away from you, neither of you minded. Deep inside, you found his touch more than welcome, but there was still an itch at the back of your mind, as if there was a gap to be filled.

“L - Levi?” His gaze vehemently on you made your voice catch in your throat. A couple awkward coughs made your voice light, “Why are you helping me?”

He reached to you again, slowly this time, confident this time, “Because I want to.”

Two slow blinks. _What did he just say?_ You wondered if hallucinations were a symptom of infection. He corrected himself, “No. Actually, it’s more than that.”

Steel blue eyes contrasted perfectly with the orange lighting. Any hint of cold had melted away in the sunset, “It’s that you deserve it. I have to make up for how I acted before.”

_Actually, it’s more than that too._

That 57th expedition had taught him so much, but first, foremost, most crucially: Do not wait to admit how you feel. He never envisioned losing his entire squad that day. If he could have, he would have first told them how much they meant to him, how much he cared about them, how much he loved them. 

The weariness in your eyes was nothing short of a wake-up call. He could hold up this neutral facade, but that would be failing everyone. He would not let their deaths would not be in vain. He would have no regrets.

Levi placed his hands at the sides of your head, hovering over you. He spoke softly into your ear, “It’s because I love you.”

// // //

_There is one thing that would help me._

_There is one thing I could do._

“Hold me.”

Simultaneously, you had spoken. Simultaneously, you embraced the other. Simultaneously, you both decided: 

_I’ll never let go of him._

_I’ll never push her away._

_Anything. I’ll do anything for you._


	15. A - Z Headcanons (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by @fairy-tail-babes “Headcanon Game - A to Z - NSFW”.

**NSFW. Graphic descriptions regarding sex ahead. Please beware!**

**A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)**

Cleans up!!! He will not hang you, the sheets, or anything out to dry. Expect a sensual and loving shower (or bath if either of you are weak in the knees). Always likes to end the night right.

**B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)**

He secretly prefers his upper body, hands down actually. While he may cover up with long sleeves and layers, he saves and showcases his best features for his one and only. An outlined back, slim waist, strong V, buff shoulders, defined arms, flawless chest, his (and most others’ favorite). As for his partner’s body, he loves a nice ass. Size not important, as long as it is cute and all his. Nipples are always fun to play with too.

**C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)**

A playful cumslut always riles him up in all the right ways. He loves to watch you guzzle him down, as if his cum is the last drink on the planet. If he is feeling especially dominant, cleanliness qualms will be pushed aside. His white strands will paint your fucking face. 

**D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)**

Levi is extremely vulnerable to voices. His partner whispering sweet nothings in his ear is enough to make him cum in his pants, that’s just how helpless he is to it. Tamer things such as exertions from exercise, a sigh of relief, a raspy voice fresh out of sleep still make him weak in the knees. There’s a reason he is always offering you massages, he loves those pleasured moans of yours. 

**E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)**

Despite not sleeping around, he is quite experienced. Familiar with most any position. And of course, he knows what the fuck he is doing. When you lay with him, there is no shred of doubt. He knows his way around a bed, his way around a body, his way around pleasure.

**F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)**

When in doubt, tie them up. Really, he thinks ropes can do no wrong. A little restraint can go a long way.

**G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)**

VVV serious. The only humor he finds is how easily he can turn you on, how thirsty you can get for him, and it will only manifest in a sinister chuckle. Only mocking your sorry state, no goofy or even kind-hearted laughing allowed.

**H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)**

He’s not going to wax or get meticulous with manscaping, but he likes to keep things tidy, just like everything else in his life. Hair down there is rougher than above, yet still the same shade. Never gets in the way.

**I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)**

In tune to his partner through and through. Each flinch, each gasp, each and every reaction informs his next move. Sex is a physical outpour of love. He will only have sex with someone he cares about, evidenced by all his effort and attention in the moment.

**J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)**

Masturbation is never planned for him. It is something done out of necessity, urgency, and is thus a relinquishing of control. In that way, he approaches it with apprehension, seeing it almost as a moment of weakness. However, with the absolutely shameful and uncontrollable moans he releases, one would never figure he has qualms. When his mind wanders to the right fantasy, something within him comes alive. Once he is set off, he is helpless to himself. It is nothing short of pornographic for his partners, unbeknownst to him. The idea that he is so ashamed of himself makes it all the more attractive.

**K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)**

Dominance and submission. After all, he believes pain is the best discipline. Nothing abusive, nothing you would not consent to, nothing that would not please both of you. Given your consent, however, he loves to spank your cheeks red, leave bite marks and bruises, and tie you up like a work of shibari art. Orgasm denial for hours on end, hearing you beg for “captain” to bring you some relief. 

**L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)**

He finds nothing wrong with your bed, it has enough space for all needs and all positions. However, he cannot deny the thrill in spur-of-the-moment settings. His office, the car (carriage in canon), or anywhere in the dark as long as it’s not too filthy.

**M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)**

When his partner is in heat and needy, there is no way he can leave them be. Any effort you give to seduce him will be easily noticed and completely hot to him. His partner so desperate for him and his attention, just the thought can turn him on, let alone your actual act. 

**N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)**

Making a huge mess. He is nothing short of adventurous, far from vanilla, but something about staining the sheets nags his mind like nothing else. He will not be able to focus, too caught up with where everything is landing. Food, wine, anything unclear (as in not see-through) is off-limits. And, of course, noncon is not sex nor is it sexy. Growing up in that brothel, be assured nothing is less sexy to him than lack of consent.

**O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)**

Dead tie. You taste fucking good. Your moans and praise are music to his ears. Your fingers in his hair reward like nothing else. On the other hand, he adores the sight of you on your knees. When you deep throat him, slap him against your face, gulp him down, he is sure there is no better view on Earth.

**P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)**

Can do either of course. Fast and rough when either of you want it that way. Slow and sensual for deliberate love making such as make-up sex, sleepy sex, edging, or tender-loving.

**Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)**

Relies on them for those days you get spunky. When you grab his thigh too high, spank his ass, slap his front, or whisper dirty things in his ear, especially in public, you know he is going to pull you aside and get his revenge. Just as you have humiliated him, he is going to get back right away. Besides, there is something about slamming into you before you’re fully prepared that takes both of your breaths away.

**R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)**

Depends on his headspace. Depends on the day. After a long day, he will not be keen to learn something new. However, on those certain days where confidence is soaring, and he is a confident one, he itches to experiment. As for risk-taking, he is particularly prone if the blame can be pointed elsewhere. He will finger you under the table at a meeting, since no one will be raising an eyebrow at him. He will make you take your underwear off at dinner as he’s not the one reaching to his hips. Fucking in a place where you could get caught, he will stay completely dressed, but yank your clothes down to your ankles.

**S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)**

He’s not the one you should worry about. He can go all night, however many times you can handle. He is no selfish lover. He is more than willing to sit out for a round and please you with fingers, his mouth, or toys. Whatever it takes.

**T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)**

Toys are primarily used for BDSM sessions, primarily used on the partner. Tying you up and using that vibrator on you, watching you thrash and yearn for that certain touch or certain angle, it is one of his favorite hobbies. As he owns your toy, you own his. Once in a blue moon, he finds himself the one tied up. Once past the mental wall, he cannot deny: it feels amazing. Still, it is saved for special occasions.

**U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)**

Teasing master!! He teases on both ends of the spectrum. If you want a built-up orgasm, he will perform for you all night. If you have been a naughty one, he will punish you endlessly with orgasm denial. Either way, he is well-attuned to your telltale signs. There is no way you’ll sneak - even one - out of his teasing, whether you want to or not.

**V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)**

He is almost never loud but that does not matter. His sexy sighs, gasps, pants, they all MORE than make up for it. In foreplay, he is breathless, releasing sounds from the throat up. When fucking, he is gruff, emitting sounds from deep within. Not to mention, endless dirty talk throughout.

**W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)**

If you go to Levi confessing a kink that you feel is “out there”, he is going to indulge you without any hesitation. The idea of his seemingly innocent partner having a unique fetish - that only he gets to know about - that only he can fulfill for you - it gets him off just as much as you. Beware, though. Once he knows what sets you off, he will tease you with public displays of indulgence - inconspicuous to others, opposite only to you - knowing you will pounce on him the second you get home.

**X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)**

The size of the tool doesn’t matter, it’s all about how you use it (and boy does he use it right)! Still, his dick is disproportionate to his height, in that it is much bigger than expected. A sweet pink color, but don’t dare call him cute.

**Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)**

In control of his body at all times, even his sex drive. If you’ve teased him to no end, though, he will quickly succumb. On the quirkier side of things, he gets especially yearning after a day filled with idiots, he’ll need some reprieve. He comes home from a long day with an even longer member in his pants. He won’t even try to hide his erection from you, he has long since run out of patience for that. 

**Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)**

He will only fall asleep after he sees you sound asleep. He is not only an insomniac, but he also cares deeply about the well-being of others, especially anyone he cares enough about to sleep with. Plus, that sleeping face of yours is the perfect thing to end the day with. 


	16. Rescuing Reader

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader goes MIA. Defying Erwin’s orders is the first of Levi’s endeavors in the rescue.

**WC: 3800 words**

**Tags: angst turned fluff, hurt-comfort, sfw**

_At last, you recognized: This was not at all a dream._

“Attention, please.”

He had heard these announcements countless times, Levi kept fixated on his meal. After so many, they were practically white noise. That is, until he heard your name listed as Missing In Action. Eyes widened in shock. _She can’t be..._

Erwin posted the roster on the wall, “Right. If you see any of these soldiers, please alert HQ immediately. Continue on.”

_Continue on?_ You were missing, there was no way he could carry on as normal. He would not stay to finish his meal, in fact, he would not be staying at all tonight. Immediately, he returned his tray and returned to his quarters.

Externally, he was calm and collected, carefully switching from casual clothes back into uniform. Internally, he was angry and anxious, heart beat fast and mind raced over his upcoming solo expedition.

For the second time in 24 hours, he was getting into his uniform and preparing to venture outside the walls. It was more than just a pain in the ass, it was an extreme danger, but that was at the back of his mind. All annoyance was buried under concern for you. _I have to get there. Now. Now. Now._

Before leaving his room, he pulled his hood up, hiding his all too recognizable undercut and bangs. He was going to sneak out and it had to be unnoticed. If anyone witnessed his departure, it would mean the end of his mission, the end of you.

At these late hours, most had retreated to their bunks for the night. He was immensely grateful for their rush to bed as he was attempting all but the opposite, fewer soldiers to catch his escape. Everything was smooth sailing thus far. He only needed to get to the stables and get on his horse.

_I’m almost there._

_Hold on._

_I’m coming, -_

A strong hand gripped his arm, “Levi, wait.”

// // // 

Without seeing faces, the two immediately recognized each other, “Tch. Get off me, old man.” Levi shook his arm, forcing Erwin’s hand off his tricep.

Erwin kept calm and level, “Where do you think you are going?”

Levi snapped his gaze back to the commander, hood falling to his shoulders, “Going to do something I should have done hours ago, would have done hours ago, if not for the slow incompetence around here.” Clearly annoyed. Clearly frustrated.

Erwin raised an eyebrow. All his enraged rhetoric, the answer was lost in it. “And what is that exactly?”

Levi snarled, “Idiot. I’m going to get her.”

Firmly, “No, Levi. I can’t allow it. You and I both know that you’re far too valuable.”

“You and I both know she’s valuable too!” _Shit. The longer this carries on…_ Levi was losing control of his voice, volume and intonation rising sharply. The entire barracks could overhear his devotion to the lost soldier, his devotion to you.

Erwin’s tone intensified, “We can’t afford to lose you.”

Levi matched his severity, “We can’t afford to lose her either.”

Levi’s breathing turned heavy, fully understanding the implications, on both himself and humanity, of what he was about to say, “You lose her, you lose me too.”

Erwin’s expression snapped into pure shock. He could convince any scout to charge to their death, yet now, he could not convince this one not to, “I see.”

Even though Erwin had held him back, argued with him, doubted him, Levi was still deeply touched by his sentiment. 

He flicked his hood back above his head, “Erwin, trust me.”

// // //

The return back to that town felt both seconds and hours long. Ever since he heard you were lost, he had been rushing nonstop to find you. Still, each passing moment on this venture was another moment too long. _How am I not there yet?_ The trips back and forth from yesterday felt nowhere near as far, the expedition nowhere near as important. 

As he raced through the forest, his mind raced with thoughts. _When was she last seen? When did I last interact with her? How long has she been gone? Has she run out of supplies?_

_Will I make it in time?_

The smart and subtle strategy would be trotting through the trails, minimizing sound and commotion, and thus lessening attention. However, Levi could not help but race for you. Even if he had recognized the benefits of slowing down, his steed would not allow it. His dark horse was well-attuned to its owner. Without explicit instruction, it paced with his emotion. Their unspoken bond had saved them both countless times before, maybe one more person soon.

The only light he had was the crescent moon. Miraculously, no titan encounters. He made a mental note to report the coincidence upon returning. However, when he laid eyes on that flattened town, all thoughts were erased entirely.

_Are you alive out there?_

// // // 

The sun had set, thus commencing your second night stuck here.

Immense hunger and desperate thirst. Monotonous boredom and helpless anxiety. From the waist down, your body was buried under a fallen house. A swipe from that titan’s arm had simultaneously knocked you unconscious and collapsed the building on top of you. At least, you assumed that was what happened.

Your memory had been melting away by the minute, losing count of the hours you had been here, losing count of how many times you had tried and failed to pull yourself out. _Goddamn. Why am I so weak?_ You had tried screaming. You had tried praying. You had tried everything. The situation was easy to read. Your legs were numb, either broken or fallen asleep, you could not move them. If you could not move them, you could not get out. If you could not get out, you would not live. 

When you first woke up from the impact, you maintained your optimism. Maybe someone would come find you. But now that the second night was underway, without any sign of help, hope was nearing its end. 

No food, no water, no energy. If you fell asleep now, you may never wake up. Passing in your sleep, you could only hope your death would be that simple and painless. Far better than starvation, dehydration, or at the hands of the titans.

Still, you could not help but feel pity for yourself. If only that titan did not swipe near you, if only you had not been knocked out, if only someone had found you… Of course, enlisting in the Scout Regiment, you were prepared to face your own death, but you never expected to die in such a pathetic way: all alone, crushed under rubble, too weak to pull yourself out. Finally in the face of certain death, you broke down and wept yourself to sleep for the last time. 

_Why me?_

// // //

Then, you saw the light. A distant golden glow, coming closer and closer. 

For a few minutes, you truly believed you were on the other side, but as eyes adjusted to the brightness and sense of touch revived, you recognized this place as all too familiar. The crescent moon provided the faintest illumination, outlining the landscape and wreckage. Still stuck underneath this house, legs and body weak as ever. You could only wonder about that nearing orange light. _What is that?_

Ears perked up at the sound of horse clops. Maybe your steed had come back for you. Even then, how could you get the animal to help you, though? A manic chuckle. It was as if your fate had to play one last prank before letting you go. No, this situation was not dire enough. Here comes your helpless horse and a daunting orange light. _This world is so cruel._ A manic chuckle grew into an insane blend of laughter and tears. 

That mysterious blaze began to call out to you, calling your name. 

What you brushed off as a fading hallucination was actually your saving grace.

// // //

_Shit. Where the hell is she?_

The speed had gone from swift to sluggish in split seconds. Sensing his thoroughness, Levi’s horse instinctively slowed down, allowing him time to examine every square inch. He tugged down his hood to expand his peripheral vision. With only his lantern and a sliver of moonlight, this search would take a while. Each collapsed house, each blood splatter, each sprawled piece of equipment only enforced his fear. 

There was no time. He had to get back before the sun came out. In all this darkness, he would have to rely on his other senses too. Drifting his lantern side to side, here and there, he began calling your name.

More houses. More hollers.

No answer.

Sudden memories of his first expedition to this town. Like most missions, it ended in a hasty retreat and a failed objective. Too many titans, not enough soldiers. 

More rubble, more cries.

No answer.

This solo venture was grimmer and grimmer each passing minute. He had every reason to believe you had been left for dead, but something within him would not accept it. He had to keep looking.

More scans, more screams.

No answer. 

His voice became involuntarily frantic. Volume rose as high as it could, “Hey! Where are you!? Are you out there!?” He realized, he had never shouted like this before. His own voice nearly unrecognizable. 

Eyes and mouth doing no good, he had to at last rely on his ears. Pulling on the reins, he halted his horse and thus halted the clops. Dead silence worried him until his ears adjusted. A creek nearby, wind whistling in the trees, and… _her voice?_

A few meters ahead, a blood-curdling banshee-like hysteria. A shrieking that would have scared most away, he dismounted his horse and sprinted towards it.

// // //

It was you. 

He had found you at last, but you were barely recognizable. He knelt down to the ground and examined your state. Hot tears gushed down your face. Mouth twitched back and forth between a smile and a frown. Face was smudged with both dirt and blood.

In all he had experienced, he had never seen something like this before. This heap was so large, he was astounded you were alive. “Hey! Are you alright?”

“Captain Levi? Is that you?” Your throat was so dry, he could barely hear you. 

“It’s me. It’s me.” He gripped your hand, “You’re stuck, right? Let’s get you out.” 

“I’m - I’m so tired, Levi…” Your gaze slowly drifted from his. 

“Hey, come on. Stay with me.” Two gentle slaps, keeping you conscious. 

“I don’t think I can…” When he began moving panels, you choked on the dust, “I don’t think I can make it.”

“No, you’re fine. It’s not that bad.” Truthfully, he had no idea how bad it was. Your lower body was completely buried under brick and mortar. There was no way to tell, but there was also no way he was giving up.

As you closed your eyes once again, he grit his teeth. The time constraint was no longer returning before sunrise, it was pulling you out before you… before you…

He found a block of concrete that was just a foot high. If he could stick it between those two panels that sandwiched you, he could rotate it up and thus push the panes apart. It was the best shot he had, the only shot he had. 

It was heavy as all hell, but that insane rush of adrenaline made it light as a feather. He lugged the block beside you, “I’m getting you out of here.” 

A few deep grunts, some strains of struggle, an exasperated expression, that block had been stood up between your wooden walls. With him here to help, it just might be enough. 

With you propped on your stomach, arms stretched out in front of you, he grabbed hold of your wrists, “Can you feel your legs?”

You could only shake your head.

_Dammit._ Without your pushing off, this stance would not have the leverage. He moved closer to you, looping the insides of his elbows underneath your shoulders. Your face pressed against his chest. His feet pressed against the rubble, “You ready? I’m pulling you out... now!”

His body under yours, you were protected from sharp rocks and splinters. You felt he might rip your arms off, but somehow, you did not care. If the rescue failed, you had already accepted your fate. 

He easily picked up your indifference, “Come on, you! Don’t even think about giving up!” Levi continued pulling you towards him, laboring relentlessly to get you out. 

And suddenly, your entire attitude changed. His clenched teeth, squinted eyes, flexed muscles, protruding veins…clearly he cared about you. Giving up now, not only was it a blatant disrespect of his efforts, but you realized: this loss would affect him too, forever. 

With that, you looped your hands around the back of his neck and pulled. At last, you were trying to save yourself. At last, there was hope. You wanted to live and refused to die, “I’m almost there, Levi!”

The two of you were straining unlike ever before, both grunting and screaming to get you out from under that heap. Multiple attempts all fruitless. Levi peeked an eye open to meet your desperate gaze. And just as his efforts had inspired you, your expression encouraged him. This beautiful courageous soldier in front of him, failure was not an option. A final powerful rip, one last breathless cry -

And you were out.

// // //

Out from under and out cold, that last pull had drained you completely. With his forearms wrapped around your back, for the first time all night, Levi finally allowed himself a moment to breathe. Your warm and tired body atop his, your heartbeat and breathing across his front, the stars and moon of the night sky… he thought he could stay like this forever. 

Now that you were safe in his arms, his hours-long adrenaline rush finally started to dwindle. He thought over how improbable everything was. Neither of you encountered any titans. He found you in time. You had lived so long without food or water. The collapse avoided your vital organs. That perfect block of concrete squeezed between the pillars. All the miracles required for your rescue had happened in succession. 

It was the first time anything had gone right for him in his life. With you sound asleep, he bit down on the back of his wrist, attempting to silence his uncontainable sobs of relief. 

He pet the back of your head and whispered in your ear, “Thank you.”

// // //

He allowed himself only a few more moments of this feeling. As relaxing as this was, it could be even more so. Instead of this demolished town, he should get you two back home to safety.

Levi pushed you up off of him, just long enough to flip his position. Your limp body against his back, he draped your arms around his neck and lifted you by the back of your knees. A couple bounces to ensure your security before commencing the piggyback ride. 

A slight smirk at your light weight, the deep sleepy moans falling upon his ears…. even after such a dire situation and in the pitch-black night, you were unconsciously bringing him back from panic, _She’s so cute._

Reunited with his black steed, he lifted you onto the saddle. With one hand keeping you upright, he used the other to pull himself up to your front. Some improvised futzing with strings, he was able to anchor you to himself. Even then, he looped your arms over his shoulder for good measure. After all this, he had become hyper-aware. After all this, he would not lose you now. 

_Let’s get you home._

// // //

Once again, you woke up to a bright orange light. You looked above to the light purple sky with a growing amber orb. _Sunrise._

Yet, you were still on horseback with Levi, still not back to base. You took a 360 scan. In the distance… far back… a giant figure…

Sleepy grog wore away. You realized, this thudding you heard was not only the horse’s hurried escape, it was also the footsteps of a rapidly approaching titan. Eyes focused on your captain to find him leaning forward, whipping the reins hurriedly.

“L-Levi!” Your voice a hoarse whisper, “There’s a…! There’s a…!”

His gaze snapped behind him. The panic in your eyes, that goddamn nearing titan… _Shit!_

You were out in the open, only a handful of trees for maneuvering. Still, he anchored off of his horse and onto some sturdy branches. He yelled back to you, “Keep going!”

You cried out to him, “Wh – What do you mean!?”

Meters away, your eyes still met. “Go on without me!”

Indeed, the distance between you and the titan was increasing while the distance between him and the titan was decreasing. The fast abnormal noticed and changed his direction towards him.

In a panicked slow motion, you watched that titan swipe at him and watched him grapple away. This whole venture had been all about you and at his great expense. Still, no matter how much you hated yourself for it, you could not look away. Selfish or subordinate, you obeyed his orders and galloped towards the walls.

// // //

Your entire being, drenched in warmth. Again you began to wonder if you had gone to the other side.

You felt around you, movement slowed by a familiar friction. Eyes fluttered open to see Levi hovering above you, backlit by a bright white light. Dark bangs were highlighted to a near brown. Light skin shined in the sun. Blue irises sparkled at multiple points. He looked so angelic, you concluded you must be in heaven.

A soft whisper, “So, you’re back?”

“L – Levi?” You reached a hand to his face. It really was him, “Where are we?”

He reached a hand to yours, keeping your palm on his cheek, “We’re home.”

_Home as in…?_ “Are we dead?”

“No! We’re alive, at base, in my suite. Specifically, my tub.”

You looked down from him to your body. You were in his warm bath, stark naked, covered only by white bubbles. Instantaneously, nerves awakened to stinging all over. You clenched your teeth and winced.

Levi grimaced at your pain, _Poor thing…_ “It looks like your legs are broken, you caught a few cuts and bruises, but you should be thankful it’s just that.”

_Was this from the building collapse? The titan? Wait..._

“Levi! Did we… did you… that titan…” He already understood what you were getting at. He was hoping you would have forgotten, hoping you would not ask.

“Did we… get chased by a titan?”

Levi maintained his flat stare, internally parsing over how to answer. The guilt in your eyes was overwhelming. The last thing you needed now was to feel bad about yourself. Honesty was his policy but so was intuitive decision-making. Now, what you needed was not a sense of blame, but unconditional love.

A gentle hand under your chin tilted your gaze to his. His best acting skills on display upheld his flat expression, “No. Nothing happened.”

You clutched his wrist with a shaky hand, “Levi… really?”

It took all of his might. His lip needed to quiver, but he needed to stay strong for you, “Must have been a bad dream.”

He had put on his best convincing, but you were also a compassionate soldier who effortlessly and entirely understood those around you. In a mutual understanding, you met each other’s eyes. You had a feeling you would never coerce it out of him, but you had a feeling you knew the truth.

It was an uncertainty you could live with, he deserved to have things go his way for once. Letting his answer slide without any further questioning, it was the least you could do for him. “Thank you, Levi.”

// // //

After his gentle scrub down, he had dressed you in his clothes: boxer shorts and a white tee. After all, you only had your dirty uniform, it was unsuitable for sleep, especially in his bed. An excuse to keep the sheets pristine. An excuse to see you in this adorable outfit.

Wordlessly, it was clear: you two were both entirely exhausted. He invited you to his bed. There was no way you could refuse him, his desires, or your own.

Fatigued as you were, there was one last thing you needed before sleep, “Levi…”

“Huh?”

“There’s something I don’t understand.”

He draped his arm around your back, tugging your closer to him, “Spit it out, brat.”

You turned on your side, facing him, “Why did you come for me?”

Levi stared into your eyes. The honest truth, “I didn’t have a choice.”

_Didn’t have a choice?_ “Did Erwin order you too?”

He choked down a chuckle, _Quite the contrary._ He caressed your cheek with his hand, “You’re thinking too hard.” 

When it became clear that you did not pick up his point, he knew that words would do no good. He had to explain another way. Levi thumbed the hair out of your face. With his fingers at the back of your neck, he tugged you towards his lips. Less than an inch apart, he kept you there for a moment. A second or an eternity, the two of you gazed at each other. You took in his cool calm and collected compassion. He took in your immaculate glow and cute curiosity. The idea of this angel trapped under rubble, left to die alone, an impending whimper could only be stopped one way.

Levi pulled you towards him that last bit and kissed you. Tenderly as he could. Your lips started softly, but his composure had all but wavered after such an exhausting day. He was so in love with you, he could not hold himself back. When you kissed him back, it was the last push he could handle. A calloused hand tangled itself in your hair. A strong arm pulled you towards him, a brief throwback to the struggle back then. You both wanted to forget it, only wanted to get lost in the arms of each other, in the thought of here and now. His affection all but screamed. _It’s because I love you._


	17. A gunning yandere (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sending you off into danger is something he cannot tolerate. Providing you danger, though, the idea is thrilling.

**My first yandere attempt. Did some research. Hope I did it right. Let me know what you think...**

**WC: 2000 words**

**TW: yandere, imprisonment, kink, nsfw, guns, and otherwise scary. Please proceed with caution! Really.**

_ He could never let you go. _

The Scout Regiment. Of course, you joined for yourself, but you would be lying if you said he was not at all a factor. 

When you enrolled in the cadets, you shared that common dream: venture outside the walls, slay the titans, discover what lies beyond. Before you knew it, years of training were up. The day had finally come to choose your division. As you watched nearly all of your comrades filter away for the Garrison, you found yourself second-guessing your lifelong dream. Your body ached to abandon your loyalty, ached to join the majority. Your feet started away with a mind of their own.

As you disowned your goal, you took one last look back. Commander Erwin was unphased at the small set of soldiers, he must be used to such pity recruitments. Other leaders showed clear signs of disappointment, but one man stood out from the rest. Captain Levi met your gaze with direct eye contact. That alone was enough to make you stop in your tracks, but the faintest hint of a smile was enough to turn you back. His kind expression, meant only for you, there was no way you could walk away from it.

With that, with him, you joined the Scouts.

// // //

There was something about you. Something about him.

All throughout your orientation, he held your hand through and through. Mostly literally. Sometimes figuratively. The amount of kindness he showed toward you was noticed by many, called out by none. To garner such attention, his affection towards you must have been unprecedented.

It started as simple acts: bringing you meals, cleaning your equipment, showing you around. 

It developed into something deeper: bringing you with him wherever he went, making out with you in public, getting overprotective.

His passion for you was tight, fast, overwhelming. You were drinking it all up, guzzling it all down as he was forcing it on you. 

The night before your expedition, you found yourself in his bed, talking the night away.

// // //

While you were fast asleep, Levi stayed awake, captivated by your rest. He loved the way your body rose and fell in breathing. He loved those sleepy moans and snores that fell past your lips. He loved the involuntary squirming of your body as you tried to get comfortable, he really loved it. For hours, he felt he could watch you. For hours, he did.

Soon enough, it would be dawn and the expedition would commence. With the sunrise, his obsession with you rose as well.

_ She’s so beautiful. Far too beautiful for this world. Far too beautiful for this regiment. Far too beautiful for this expedition. _

Not only were you a fresh, young, new recruit, you were also otherwise too innocent for all this. He had seen far too much out there. The blood, the terror, the nightmare - this pure girl in front of him - he could not let them taint her. The wholesome smile he formed while watching you sleep instantly fell into a snarl. At last, he had found someone he loved, someone he wanted to protect. Tomorrow, she would run the risk of death. He clutched his forehead, shivering uncontrollably. 

_ Oh God. I can’t stand it. _

_ Oh God. I can’t lose her. _

_ Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. _

Suddenly, an overwhelming sense of dread. He practically carried expeditions on his back, and that was without the weight of someone else. Mission success and keeping you safe, he knew there was no way to achieve both.

_ Unless... _

_ Unless I… _

Sanity was wavering: near-tears to wicked giggling in a matter of seconds.

There was one way.

Only one.

// // // 

The bright afternoon sun peeked through drawn curtains, waking you up long past sunrise. 

You shot up in his bed, first realizing you were late, then noticing he was gone, at last observing your outfit. 

Last night, you had fallen asleep in your uniform. The sleepover was impromptu so you neglected pajamas. Besides, it was a little quirk of yours: wearing your clothes to sleep saved time in getting ready for a big day. Now though, your uniform was not only off, it was nowhere to be found. Instead, you were in an oversized tee shirt, definitely not yours.

A glance at the clock. Indeed, it had been hours since departure time. Still, you bolted out of bed and dashed to the door hoping to get ready. 

Locked.

_ Huh!? _

You pulled again. Locked. Locked in his bedroom? 

But not for long. A key clicked in the other side, you yanked your hand away in shock.

Levi creaked the door open, “Oh, good morning, you.” Voice was uncharacteristically cheery. 

He was dressed in his regimentals. Green cape dirtied, boots muddied, hair tangled. All signs pointed: he had gone on the expedition without you. “You let me sleep in?”

He kicked off his boots and paced towards you, “Oh no. That’s exactly what I wanted, darling.” Levi brought a hand to the back of your neck and licked your ear.

You shuddered, “No, I - I was supposed to go.”

His mouth still beside your ear, he chuckled into it, “Tsk tsk tsk… I couldn’t let you.”

As horrendous as the world outside seemed, you felt your training had been all but discarded, “But Levi... I wanted to go.” 

He pulled you away from him, “Oh?” Intonation rose sharply.

You stammered, “Levi, I… It’s not fair.”  _ If I sleep with the captain and it gives me life-or-death privileges, especially over my comrades...  _ you could not stand the thought.

But at your argument, something was breaking within him. The idea of this being “unfair”, it pushed him a little too far. With all he had done for you, how much he cared about you, what was so wrong with his affection?  _ What’s so wrong with me?  _

“But… I can’t protect you out there. And… And I…” His voice trailed, “I love you.” 

_ A - Already? _ It was only now that you realized just how fast your relationship had been going. Head over heels, yet, your first meeting felt just yesterday. You were absolutely infatuated with him, with each other.  _ Am I ready to admit it? _

He did not take your silence well. A once wide smile descended into a thin line, “So, you want to run head first into danger?” A firm hand pressed against your shoulder.

His tone had oscillated so quickly. The morning had been so confusing. There was no way to pick up what he was getting at, “I mean… I suppose…”

With that, he violently pushed you down back onto his bed - back first - so hard that you bounced up, so hard that his shirt rose above your hips, revealing pink panties. In all the chaos, you paid no mind to the underwear. On the other hand, he admired them,  _ I knew those would look good on her. _

You glanced up helplessly from the bed. Levi was leaning over you, one hand beside your head, one hand undressing himself, “If you want danger, I’ll give it.”

All throughout his life, the ones he loved had been hurt by others, outside of his control. It was pure agony. The idea of titans harming you was intolerable. The idea of him harming you, however, was not something that feared him. Pain, he was familiar with it, comfortable with it. He did not care if he harmed you, as long as it was under his control. 

Along your neck to the cusp of your chin, he drew a sharp fingernail underneath, “This will be so much better.”

Your eyes darted back and forth as your mouth came up empty. He crawled onto the bed, further and further past you. His groin suspiciously happened to hover above your face as he reached for his nightstand.

Ears picked up the drag of the drawer, “What I have in here, is  _ so  _ much better than what’s out there. More fun. More dangerous.”

For once, you had the brain capacity. You had a guess at what was coming. 

Suspicions were almost confirmed. A long, straight cylinder, shining, a handle… not a sex toy persay. 

_ A gun!? _

You started to sit up, mouth gaping in shock. Instead, he shoved you right back down to the bed, palm hot and tight against your mouth. He warned, “Ah ah ah.”

As he crept away from the headboard, he suspended himself above you. He ran the muzzle along your jawline, “Just relax…”

_ Relax?! How could I…?! _

“You never know. I can be skittish. If you startle me, maybe I’ll pull.” He brought the gun to the side of your head, briefly tilting it upward in mocking. He chuckled.  _ It’s all a big joke. _

His warning. His weapon. His wavering. You had no choice. It took all you had, but you still shook slightly.

He dragged that pistol along all of your curves. From your temple down your neck, down your shoulders, arms, and fingers. Breast to waist to hip. Between your thighs, where he kept it. 

Levi hooked the barrel underneath your panties and dragged them down. Once looped off your ankles, he balled them up in a fist and took a deep sniff. Delighted with your smell, he snickered, “You’re too sweet.”

“I’ll be the one to taint you.”  _ No one else is allowed to. _

One could never be ready for it, but you were far from prepared. A menacing bite on your thigh made you snap your legs apart in recoil. With that, he shoved the silver in, quickly and violently. 

Thanks to the handle, he had complete control of its direction and force, and he utilized it all. The weapon reached far back into you, all the way back. 

Arousal and anxiety all his doing. You did not know - he would not tell you - the gun was not loaded. Such terror at nothingness, he snickered,  _ She’s so fucking cute. _

Relentlessly, he pumped that gun in and out of you. When you squirmed at penetration, he teased, “Be careful. You’re working me up...”

He was scaring you in the best and worst ways. How good he made you feel, how much attention he gave. How scared he made you feel, how much attention he gave. 

“ _ Heh- Heh- Levi…”  _ Fear and lust blended into a chilling cry. You felt nearly sick. A pit in your stomach clashed with the heat in your core. 

A hair-raising, blood-curdling, spine-chilling orgasm. A sensation you had never felt before, _ one only I can bring you. _ Watching your body seize so helplessly, it was enough to make him cum in his pants. As he cackled through his climax, you had been sent so far, you had no idea he was just as helpless to you as you were to him.

_ Crazy for you.  _

// // //

After such sex, you once again found yourself passed out in his bed. In 24 hours, you had not left his bedroom, barely left his bed.

Each time you slept beside him, that urge grew more and more. Each moment he stared at your sleep, that desire within him deepened. 

He snickered into your ear and pet your head, “You’re too naive for your own good.” 


	18. A 3 year old nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A 3 year-old cannot understand that her father is done with expeditions, but Levi will always quell any doubts.

_**WC: 1600 words Tags: sfw, fluff, I use “daddy” here in the familial context, not in the kink way.** _

_The light of my life._

“And then they lived happily ever after.”

“Again! Again!!” Eager palms slapped the storybook pages. 

“No, no… You already got an encore, young lady.” Levi booped a careful finger on her nose.

“Ppppppppppwease!!” The pleading in her voice was near max volume. 

Despite how loud she was, he knew she was definitely overtired. An early mistake of parenting: one has to put their foot down sometimes. Otherwise, they will be stuck reading fairy tales till sunrise. “Tomorrow, okay? Daddy will read more with you tomorrow.”

In her 3 years of age, she already knew better than to tell her daddy “no”. A conflicted whine, “Mmm… okay.” 

Clear grumpiness in her voice, Levi found it both adorable and pitiful. 

His little thing, getting so worked up over something so small while he himself had gone through so much worse... His own flesh and blood, seeing her sad of course made him sad as well… They tugged at his heartstrings in their own special ways.

“Nighty night.” Levi kissed her forehead. “Don’t let the titans bite.”

// // //

As always, Levi laid by her side until he knew she was fast asleep. With how he had been raised, he remembered all too well how frightening it was to wake up alone. His mother - a prostitute, his caretaker - an assassin, both of them laid with him each night. There was no reason he could not. 

When he saw her body rise and fall and heard her tiny snores, he took his cue to leave. He carefully picked up his hand from her tummy and gradually snuck out of that bed. Hundreds of practices, he finally figured out the pattern for leaving without a stir. First, he dragged his legs over the side. Then, he pushed himself up into the seated position. One last check. With her still sound asleep, he swiftly stood from the bed. 

After rearranging her blankets and placing a stuffed animal in his place, he tiptoed to her bedroom door. A glance back to his pride and joy always ended with a choked down cry and chuckle. No matter how many times he had gone through this ritual, something about leaving her always got to him.

He had to remind himself: it was not good-bye, only good night.

// // //

With her father a former scout, she had to remind herself too. In sleep, however, she had no control over where her mind wandered. 

An unfortunately-timed nightmare...

_Daddy had been called back for one last expedition. Outside of her room, she could pick up the wariness in his voice. At the front door, Uncle Erwin begged him, “We need every man we can get.” Her father’s face fell in reluctance, “Just one more, Levi.”_

_When the sun rose, he gave a polite knock on her bedroom door. “Who is it?”_

_On the other side, in the hallway, Levi was near-tears. He always swore to himself: he would never venture outside the walls again, he would never put himself in danger now that he had her, he would never leave her daughter the orphan that he once was. Levi swallowed down his sorrows, “It’s me, honey. Can daddy come in?”_

_He had to stay strong for her. Still, she was not at all deaf to his tone. She better let him in, something was serious, “Of course, daddy!!”_

_Levi nudged the door open gently. Dressed in his uniform, she was awestruck at how cool her dad was, “Wow!!” She brought her hands to her cheeks and gaped her mouth._

_A weak smile. He had to make it back. He had to see her cuteness again. He knelt to her level, “Cutie-pie, I’ve gotta go to work today.”_

_An innocently confused expression, “But… I thought you were ‘re-tie-old’.”_

_Her mispronunciation, he could not help but grin, “Yeah, you’re right. Daddy is retired, but Uncle Erwin needs a favor.”_

_A stark frown that he quickly had to turn upside down, “But don’t worry, daddy will be back for storytime tonight.”_

_“Okayyyy...” She teased._

_This was the hardest thing he ever had to do. Breaking his promise to his daughter, his heart was breaking as well. “Can I have a hug first?”_

_“Mmm… I guess!” She threw herself onto him._

_He felt he had to cry, but he knew he had to be a strong father figure for her. He allowed himself a tight embrace for just a moment before springing up from his squat and into the air. With her tiny body in his hands, he stuck his arms out and spun her around until she giggled like crazy, causing him to do the same._

_He teased, “Are you gonna be a good girl while I’m gone?”_

_“Yes! Yes!!” If she answered right, he would put her down._

_“I can’t hear you!” He spun faster._

_“YES!!” Dizzy and frantic laughter._

_“Okay, okay. Down you go!” He lightly tossed her onto her bed, her giggling failing to cease, “Stay here until I get back okay?”_

_“Okay!”_

_“If you’re a good girl, I’ll come back sooner.”_

_“Okay! I will!”_

_A good girl she was, but he did not come back soon._

_He did not come back at all._

// // //

After tucking her in, Levi always relied on his late-night cup of tea. Being a parent was absolutely exhausting, the most tiring trial he had ever gone through in his life, which was saying a lot for him. Still, there was no way he could simply go to sleep after such a long day. The insomniac he was, he always had to wind down first. 

As he boiled the water for his tea, his daughter had unknowingly crawled out of bed in search of her long lost father. Tiny footsteps were drowned out by the screaming kettle. 

The nightmare only compounded, only seemed more real, when she opened his bedroom door. A neatly-made bed, he was definitely not there. It was just as he would have left it in the morning. _He’s not home?_ For the first time in her life, an unfamiliar feeling settled in her heart. 

She pulled his door back shut. Panic.

// // //

Stumbling into the living area, she finally found her daddy. The whistle of the tea kettle and shadows of dim light were especially frightening tonight.

When he spotted her in footie pajamas, twiddling her thumbs, standing still in the hallway, he held in a chuckle. “Hey there, little brat.” Levi put his hands on his hips and teased, “What are you doing awake?” 

At the sight of her father, safe after all, she ran towards him, tripping and whimpering along the way. She wrapped her arms around his shin, head resting against his knee, “Daddy’s home! Daddy’s home!” Words typically expressed in excitement were instead drenched in distress.

He stuttered, perplexed, “Y-Yeah… Daddy’s always been home.”

She shook her head against him, “Daddy - scary - dream…” Weak inhales interrupted her sentiment.

_A nightmare?_ Fatherly instincts immediately kicked in. Levi squatted down, allowing her grip to stay on his leg while also meeting her level. He wrapped a strong and gentle arm around her back, easily fitting her head in his hand, “Don’t worry, little angel. Dad’s here.”

Tiny, hyperventilating lungs were largely breaking his huge heart. He had to take her to her soothing spot. Levi scooped his hands underneath her shoulders and lifted her into his arms. She instinctively nuzzled her face into his neck as he slowly paced towards the rocking chair. 

When he started to sit down, she startled at the motion and held him as tightly as she could. “Don’t worry. Daddy’s got you.” Levi pet the back of her head as she continued crying into his shoulder.

When her sobs grew more frantic, he pulled his daughter from his chest and met her eyes with concern, “Can you tell Daddy what happened?”

She wiped her eyes with her chubby balled fists, “you - you… you left me alone,” she choked on her sobs, “all day!”

He knit his eyebrows, beckoning for more explanation. She continued, “And - And - you never came back from work!”

“Oh, honey…” Levi brought her back to his chest. “Daddy’s all done with work, remember?”

Her only response was a dubious whine. He comforted, “Daddy’s never going to leave you.”

“Never ever.”

More rocking. More holding. 

Less crying. Less trembling.

As the night went on, his beloved daughter gradually felt at ease. Her father was a master of calm. Even after a long day of parenting, he would always have the energy for her. 

Worn feet pressed against the stool, pushing them back and forth in the rocking chair. Bitten, burned, battered hands were gentle to the touch as they held her body up against his. As much as he wanted to cry at this sad scene, he kept his breathing cool, calm, and collected for her.

He cooed her back to sleep with repetitions of, “I’ll never leave.”

No matter the nightmare, he would always keep his word.


	19. On Time (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the first piece I ever wrote lol. I found it buried deep down in my drive. It is about a year old. Honestly, I feel like my writing has grown so much since then! Still, I figured I should post it here.  
> Word Count: 2560  
> Tags: smut, bondage

20:27 read your pocket watch.

_Is it time? Is he a 5 minutes early person? Right on time person?_

The meeting was officially scheduled for 20:30, but since this was your first day enlisted in the Scouts, you weren't totally aware of the customs around here.

_Oh no- is he a 15 minutes early person?_

You had heard Captain Levi was respectful of authority- he certainly gave off that impression at the recruits' orientation yesterday- letting Erwin do all of the speaking. However, you also knew he was one of a kind- a very distinct soldier of the Regiment. No, a very distinct soldier of humanity. He followed the leader, but also stood out from everyone.

All this thought, all for the purpose of trying to figure out when to knock on his door. You paced quietly in the hall outside of his office.

Suppose he was the right on time type. You could already hear him,

"Excuse me. I believe our interview was scheduled for 20:30. I am in the middle of some important work that I was hoping would be uninterrupted. I will see you in 3 minutes as scheduled."

Or if he was the ahead of time type,

"Oh, you finally made it. Right on the dot at 20:30. You must have been doing something very important. An interview with the captain, no need to arrive early to that, huh? Why showcase your dedication when you could just be on time?"

Ugh. You could easily see either outcome happening and they both seemed equally undesirable. A rock and a hard place.

_Suppose there's no knowing until it happens._

You pulled your watch out of your breast pocket again.

20:31

_Shit!_ You had spent too much time deciding if you should be early or punctual and ended up late. You were certain that he would not be happy.

With sealed lips, you glanced at the "CAPTAIN LEVI" nameplate on the door and clenched your fist.

**_*knock kno-*_ **

Before your second knock could finish, the door swung open.

"Ah- you made it. I was just about to go out and yank you from your bunk." A pair of ice blue eyes stared you down.

"I- I... I'm sor-"

"Come in."

A chill went down your neck. You felt the need to apologize but the words just could not come out. An apology stuck in your throat, you stepped through the door frame and followed Levi in. He briefly pivoted the interviewee chair before rounding his side of the desk.

_A gesture? Did he just pull out my chair for me?_

Before he sat down, he shouldered his jacket off and hung it on the back of the chair. You could not help but notice how muscular his chest was. Of course, he must have always been this way, but the loose jacket hid his figure. This tight grey button down accentuated it.

"Hey. Please... sit down."

"Y-yes."

"Would you like to explain to me why you were late?"

_Umm... I was trying to deduce whether you are an early guy or an on time guy and I overthought it so long that I ended up late._

"I was preparing for this interview intensely beforehand and time slipped away from me. I am sorry, Captain." It wasn't exactly a lie, but even so, you felt extremely nervous. So nervous in fact, that a lie may have even been easier to tell.

"Ah. I see..." Levi lowered his gaze from your eyes to a thin stack of papers labeled "SURVEY CORPS RECRUIT INTERVIEW" on his desk.

_He... he isn't yelling at me?_

"... I only ask because I was anticipating having a whole session with you." Levi brought his stare up from the papers and back to your eyes. The frozen hue from before had melted and his eyes looked softly through his bangs, "I have a lot to learn..." he aligned the stack of papers with a few taps on the desk. "Are you ready now, Cadet?"

Despite his professional demeanor, you still felt unsure of the tone of this interview. _Anticipating a whole session with you_ was the only phrase you could seem to recall from the exchange. Why did his eyes look so inviting? You had seen them many times throughout the orientation, but they always gave that cold appearance, except for this moment.

"Yes, Captain," you tried to maintain your composure and stay present, "I am ready."

"Okay then. Let's get started." Levi opened the bottom right drawer of his desk, filed the interview papers away, and shut the drawer firmly. This left the top of his desk completely clear.

Your mouth drifted open in surprise. Weren't those papers important? Weren't they for your interview? Why were they on the desk in the first place?

"I have been waiting for you specifically, Cadet.... waiting all day in fact." Levi untied his white handkerchief from his neck.

You stared in silence. You could now see the outline of his clavicle through his shirt. Oh, he was so defined. You felt a burning gaze at your forehead.

"ah-Hem..." his throat cleared. He had caught you staring.

"Oh- I... I..." you stuttered. A red flush worked its way onto your cheeks

"You haven't been anticipating our meeting?" Levi inquired. You thought you may have picked up a disappointed tone.

This was your chance to show your dedication to the Survey Corps- to Captain Levi. But all you were conveying was disinterest. Really, it was hard to compose yourself around Captain Levi, and you had stayed timid as a safety blanket throughout this whole process. But if you wanted to leave a good impression, you had the feeling you would have to rip it off.

"I have been looking forward to meeting you all day too, Sir!" you insisted. Without quite intending to, you had leaned in closer.

"I see. That is good to hear." Levi's cheek twitched. His eyes were deprived of all chill, "In fact, that's what I like to hear."

You had never seen Captain Levi like this. He was only ever terse, annoyed, uninterested. Was this some sort of test?

Almost as if he was reading your mind, he folded his arms and crossed a leg over the other, "Now, I want you to know that you are in the clear. Relax. I have already filled out your recruitment interview with the perfect answers. You have been handpicked for my squad. For this session, I want to get to know you for who you are not only as a cadet, but as a person." He unbuttoned the first button of his shirt.

"C-Captain?"

"Levi. Please."

"Sorry. I. Um... Levi?"

"Yes?" _Why did he sound annoyed again?_

"Why me?"

"Are you serious?" His eyebrows tensed together and lips parted. Your unwavering curious face answered his rhetorical question. "You were in your class's top 10. You show promise in decision making. And the way you can move in your ODM gear-"

_I suppose these assessments were all true._

_"_ gives me a hard-on like nothing else." Levi exhaled.

Your breath caught in your throat. You almost choked on air but swallowed it down. You opened your mouth to gasp but were pulled up by your collar- made to stand- before you could do anything.

Captain Levi calmly stared into your eyes, just long enough to make you think, before pulling you into a deep kiss over the desk. His tongue demanded to be let in. You didn't resist. His warm tongue explored your mouth feverishly. Before he pulled away, he made sure to tug your lip with his teeth. The tiny ting of pain sent a shiver down your spine.

"Ohhh... nervous are we? You're quaking just from one kiss?" Levi looked mockingly concerned. Almost a _you poor thing_ sort of look.

Levi went back in for more, but merely licked the outside of your lips. His tongue trailed down your chin, then your jawline, then found a place on your neck where it stuck for a while."

" _Nngh- ahh!_ C-Cap-!"

His teeth grazed your neck causing you to sharply inhale.

"Hey." he stopped. "What are you supposed to call me, Cadet?"

"L-Le-"

"That's right. I am Levi to you. And each time you forget that, I may have to remind you... you should know, I think pain is the best tool for discipline."

His speech stopped when he brought his mouth back to your neck- sucking where his teeth were before. As if the scrape wouldn't be enough, he would leave a bruise there too.

You knew he was inflicting pain- but all you could recognize was pleasure.

"What are you waiting for? Are you still not totally invested in our session? Undress me." Levi demanded.

"Yes, sir!"

"Huh... forgetful are we?"

Before you could realize your mistake, he had cupped his hands around your underarms and pulled you over the desk. You now sat on the wood surface, facing him, breasts undeniably close to his face.

"Now that you can reach me, there should be no excuse not to have me completely undressed within the next minute. You will have to do that for me while I make you remember my name..."

Your mind was racing to understand all that was happening, but you were always redirected from thinking to a path of pleasure.

Levi grabbed your jacket and buttoned shirt with two fists and ripped them apart simultaneously- causing your chest to be all but exposed.

"Ohhh- yes. A lace bra? Just for your interview with me, huh?" Before you could answer, he had peeled the bra down beneath your bust. With his left hand he twisted your right nipple. With his right hand, he held your hip down. With his teeth, he bit on your left nipple. With his tongue, he prodded it.

"Ah! Ehh-Ahh! C..."

"Huh? What's that?" Levi's intonation made your mind snap back.

"L...L-Levi!"

"Yeahhh... Yeah baby... Nice and hard for me. Now... do as you were told." Levi's voice deepened. His deep tone made you simultaneously on edge but comforted.

_Oh. Right..._

Your hand was shaky, but yet you managed to undo each button. With each undoing, you saw more of his immaculate torso. You noticed his chest was heaving. His shirt was tucked in, hiding the very last one, should you...?

"Oh yeah, Cadet... reach down there. I expect you to carry out your orders through all means necessary."

The white canvas pants of the uniform left little room for more than one's mere body. To pull his shirt out, you would have to undo his belt and work your own hand in there...

"Hurry, Cadet. You have already made me wait once today. Don't make me wait a second more." Even though you saw his intense breathing, you could not pick it up from his voice. Monotone through and through- even with your erect nipple in his mouth.

_Get out from that blanket_ you thought. _Now is your chance to show your interest_.

You hurriedly unfastened his brown leather belt. Next, the button and zipper. When you reached in, you pulled out the shirt for that last measly button. But you also whipped out his hard member, squeezing it tightly in your shaky hand.

" _Ahhh... yeah_ Cadet. Finally, you're intrigued now, huh?" Levi suddenly sounded breathless.

"Yes, Levi... I am. I want- I... I need..."

"What do you need, Cadet?" He went back to teasing your nipples- sending jolts through your nervous system.

"I need you, Captain!" you screamed in desire.

_"Ngghhuh_.... you are so... _nghihh_... so..." Levi's eyes squinted shut. A vein appeared in his neck. You felt some leaking on your hand.

_Oh no._

" _So..."_

Levi took your shoulder in his hand and shoved you onto your back. Cold wood met your curves.

"It seems I still have some work to do..." he proclaimed. If you had heard him say this out of context, the tone would make you think he was merely talking about paperwork. "I suppose I can't expect you to remember my name until I make you scream it repeatedly."

" _Huh... ohh... Le...Leviii_...."

"That's right. Good start, Cadet." Levi exhaled. You could see now that his cheeks had turned pink. A rare sighting on humanity's strongest.

Levi's hands undid your belt with an agonizingly slow speed. Then, with haste, he grabbed your right ankle and used your belt to tie it to a desk handle. He picked up his belt to do the same with your left ankle.

" _Ahh yes_... That's it... your wet pussy wide open... Just for me, right?" Levi's voice was husky.

You took a second to take in the view. A short Levi now towered over you. Usually dressed in long sleeves and long pants, you could now see everything. Defined shoulders. Strong jawline. Protruding clavicle. Muscled abs.

"Yes, Levi! Just for you..." you gasped.

"Oh, Cadet, you are dripping on my desk..." Levi sighed with pity, "I will have to clean that later..."

Without a moment's hesitation, Levi took his member from your hand. With a grunt, he took it all and shoved it to the very back of your pussy- instantly hitting your soft spot.

"EhhhH - _Ah_! Hah- _nghhuhhh_..."

" _Mmm yeah, baby_... Moan for me..." Levi rammed in you repeatedly- never giving your weakness a break.

"Levi- I... Levi- I..!!"

"What is it, Cadet?" Levi smirked, pretending not to know what was causing you such heat.

"You're going to... going to make me... Hnghh- _ah_!!"

"Come for me, baby... Don't even think about holding back." Levi warned.

With one fell swoop, Levi pushed himself upwards by his wrists. This angle allowed him to swipe your clit and reach all the way back with his long, hard dick- sending you over the edge. A scream was building from the back of your throat. Embarrassed, you took the back of your hand to your lips to muffle it.

"Did you _listen_ to me, Cadet?" Levi snarled. He tried to come off as intimidating, but with his eyes so weary, cheeks flushed red, bangs enveloped in sweat, dick twitching toward release, he wasn't intimidating- he was vulnerable. Still, you obeyed your Captain. You took your hand from your mouth and threw it onto your forehead as orgasm rang throughout your body. Your womanhood felt unbelievably wet. Your chest heaved. Your Captain was gifting you an intense pleasure like you had never felt before- the least you could do was follow his orders and stop holding back.

"Le- Lev... LEVI!!!"

"Ca- _Cadehhht.._." Levi's eyes squeezed shut, "heh-uh... heh-uh... Ahhh- _huh_!"

_That's what I like to hear._

"nngghh- _huh_. AH- _huh_...! I... _I'm..!_ hhh- _AHhh!"_

_Don't even think about holding back._

_"C-Cadett!"_

Levi fucked you one last time. Hard. You could feel the cum deep in you. Captain Levi's cum. In you. The thought sent a wave through your body that made Levi flinch in orgasm.

"heh-... heh- _nnnghhh_... ba... _by_... Ohh- _fuck_..."

Levi collapsed onto you breathlessly. His warm, tough chest made contact with your tender nipples causing one last sharp inhale.

Levi laid a soft, lazy kiss on your sternum. He lifted his head enough to make eye contact with you. His usually icy eyes were ocean. Humanity's strongest was completely vulnerable in your arms.

"Oh baby... that was worth the wait. Just try to be on time for our next meeting, okay?"


	20. Punk and in love (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Special shoutout to @nefelimalfoy for holding my hand and introducing me to this trope. I would be clueless without her. This is my first punk try, but I have definitely been sucked in! I can’t wait to write it again in the future! I hope you enjoy, love 🖤 
> 
> The way that fanboy touched you, he is going to remind his backup singer just who she is a member to.

**WC: 3000 words TW: smut**

_Secrets I have held in my heart Are harder to hide than I thought_

No matter who you were, no matter how many times you had done it, performing in front of a crowd was always a rush. 

For Levi, each show came with an extra buzz. He never discounted his luck of success in this industry, but he also never took his backup for granted. The incredible musician you were, each song by your side reminded him: he was fortunate to have snatched you up into his band. After years of touring together, his feelings for you still intensified each night.

Tonight was no different. 

After such a great show, hours of performing by your side, he was looking forward to spending time alone with you. To his dismay, you were somehow able to sneak away from the aftershow early. Watching you head off for the crowd, longing to join you, he still could not help but love his view from behind. Tight leather skirt bounced up a little high. Fishnet stockings the only cover of your lower cheeks and upper thighs. Tall black boots perfectly clung to the curves of your calves. _She’s the entire package._

As all his attention drifted from his fans to his backup, guests became jealous of his obvious crush. As with most things in life, however, he did not give a shit. When it came to how others felt about him, there was only one person whose opinion actually mattered.

After the last of hastily signed autographs, Levi wasted no more time with the fans. He wanted, needed, to find you.

// // //

At last, he did. 

First, he searched backstage, only finding your other bandmates, all of whom also had no idea where you were. The ride was still parked out back, you were not there, you could not be at the hotel either. 

_Deviant little thing must have wandered off._ Levi begrudgingly made for the mob. The damp and sweaty environment of clubs, he never got used to it in his years as a musician. He waded his way through a sea of fans. As they threw themselves onto him, he ignored every one of them, only in search of you. 

After shoving girls off of him for what felt like years, he was disappointed to find you attached to some random guy in the mob. In fact, disappointment was an understatement.

Levi clenched his teeth, looking up through dark bangs, “Meet and greets are over.” 

The drunkard did not seem to recognize the lead singer, blatantly ignoring his authority. “Hah. I don’t have to pay to see her. She wants me here.” The fan maintained eye contact with your lead as he lowered a hand to your hip, tugging you into his side. 

_Tch… idiot._ This fanboy was lingering a little too close to you for a little too long.

Ignoring Levi’s trademark glare, he bantered on, “Listen, shorty. She’s a big girl, she can make her own decisions, even if you don’t like them.” He rubbed a sweaty palm up and down your side, drawing an uncomfortable grimace from you. 

_That’s it._ One hand was soft in holding you in place. The other hand roughly shoved that asshat off of you and to the floor. A swift kick of his boot knocked out some teeth, keeping him silent and in place while also drawing gasps and stares from the entire venue. 

It was all he could take for one night. Lined eyes met yours, “Come on, let’s get outta here.”

// // //

Levi held a fierce grip of your wrist as he snuck you out the backdoors.

Instead of the tour bus, he took you back to the hotel on his motorbike. The brisk wind from air resistance was not the only reason for your chills. Leather jacket was sweet and rough against your skin. Arms around his abs, you could feel the muscles underneath those layers. Head against his shoulders, concert smells of booze and drugs were masked by his clean cologne. As romantic as the ride was, you felt you knew exactly the punishment that was waiting for you back at the hotel.

Each time a fan got too eager, he was quick to crack down on you. _You’re a star, don’t you know that? Act like you’re worth something. Stop giving yourself away to these fuckin’ losers._ He had scolded you countless times.

As soon as you dismounted his bike and took your body off his, he quickly revived the contact with a tight hold of your hand. Fingers intertwined with yours. If not so preoccupied by the upcoming discipline, you would have noted: it was the first time he ever held your hand.

He hurriedly dragged you to his hotel room. Without turning the lights on, he slammed the door behind you and gave a stern glare. _Fuck. Here we go again._

When he opened his mouth, you cut him off in defense, “Yeah, I get it… it makes us look bad, too accessible, not exclusive, whatever! I get it. Okay!?…” 

Levi knit his brows. It was not that. That reason he had always used, that it was bad for the band or whatever, it was always just a coverup. The guise he had used in protecting his feelings for you, he would have to abandon it and just tell the truth. “No, brat.” 

_Huh?_

After countless reruns of this act, you thought you had the scene figured out. Little did you know, the night ahead was not a lecture, but it was indeed a punishment.

// // //

Levi brought a gloved hand to the back of your neck and tugged your ear to his lips, “It’s that I can’t fucking take it.”

A hand around your neck was already an adrenaline rush, but something about those silver rings, that spiked bracelet, and the fact that it was your lead singer Levi gave an unbelievable thrill. Fingers caressed your neck perfectly around the barbs of your choker, as if he knew it like the back of his hand, both squeezing and tickling. Eyes bore into you, just long enough to make you think, before bringing you into a deep and unexpected kiss.

No point in slow build-up, he had been doing that for years, Levi ate at you like you were the last thing on Earth. Looped piercings in his lip tugged yours. Metal stud in his tongue clanged against your teeth. Hot soft tongue was the perfect contrast to his cold hard jewelry. The stark opposites made for a blend of pain and pleasure. _A blend only I can give her._

You never imagined yourself to fall into that stereotype: the female musician who sleeps with the male lead, but _goddamn, if it doesn’t feel good…_ You could not help yourself. All at once, you gave in. All too clearly, you realized the fantasy you were living out. The dream that countless girls would kill for, you were in it. Not making the most of this opportunity, it would be an injustice to everyone. 

You kissed him back - hard. Your tongue moved with a mind of its own, dancing with his in between licks of his teeth. Sneaky fingers snaked underneath his shirt, lifting it up by the hem. You had seen him shirtless countless times, a typical crowd-pleaser at concerts, but never in such an intimate setting. This close and personal, in lieu of strobes and smoke, you could notice each and every fascinating detail in his tattoos, in his muscle, in him. 

Your eager response to advances was more than a pleasant surprise. His calm and collected nature, however, resisted the urge to cave in. A string of saliva stretched as he pulled from the kiss, “ _Hmph,_ a bad girl are we?” 

He had called you that plenty of times before. But now that you knew his true feelings, all those prior incidents were given new significance. Just the idea that he had been flirting with you all along, you felt your panties dampening already.

You bit your lip, “Maybe I am.” 

When you snickered, he dove right back in, hungrier than before. This time, instead of your lips, he scraped his teeth along your jawline. He made a fist in your hair and pulled your head to the side, allowing himself to leave love marks all along your neck. The reddening bruises and bites drew riled gasps from you. Music to his ears. Your singing voice was sexy, but these vocals were something else. 

Between nips and licks, he exhaled against your neck, “ _Mmm…_ relax, sweetheart.” He heightened his pitch, “I haven’t even started yet.”

He had waited far too long for this. Multiple tours, countless concerts, you were absolutely irresistible to him through and through. Each time that you shared a dressing room, each time you danced with him on stage, each time you nodded off on his shoulder after a gig, you had unknowingly wrapped him around your finger. His vision… _now that I’m finally living it_ …, excited erection already leaking in his pants, _Oh, fuck me..._

At last, he had this chance. He had to make you all his: tell the world and remind you that you belonged to him and him alone. The image of you, covered in his marks, on display for everyone who oggled you, it was giving him an entirely new feeling: an intense mixture of pride, lust, vanity, jealousy, even more indescribable emotions… 

There was only one way to take it out.

// // //

After leaving marks all the way down your neck, clavicle, chest, he found himself at the cusp of your corset. The garment daunted him for just a moment before he rapidly tugged the cups beneath your breasts. He was about to stick you into his mouth when a glimmer caught his eye.

Nipple piercings? He never thought you would actually have them and _fuck_ , if he did not like them a lot. He chuckled into you, breath further hardening your nipple, “Naughty little thing…”

You opened your mouth to retort, but a sudden clamp of his teeth prohibited any words and allowed only gasps.

_“Oh, fuck!”_ Cold metal of his tongue was the polar opposite to your warm nipple. Sensation nothing short of amazing.

You sounded amazing too. Sharp inhales encouraged him to bite and lick even harder. His mouth played with your right nipple. Left hand pinched the other. Right hand snuck underneath your skirt. Fingers woven into your fishnets squeezed your delightful ass. He was using his entire body to play with yours. All of him, all of his attention, was absolutely overwhelming. You threw your head back and moaned.

And that - your desperate exertion - forced an end to the foreplay, it was the last he could take. He grabbed you by the shoulders and spun you around. A rough grasp of the back of your neck shoved you face down onto the bed. Hungry hands hiked your skirt up past your hips. As you heaved against the sheets, he allowed himself a moment to take in your sorry state. Stockings held up by garter belts. Panties bunched in between your folds. Curves accentuated by your sexy mess of an outfit. _A hell of a view,_ he punished it with a spank.

He pressed his full front to your back, muscular abs meeting your curves from behind. Hand in your hair yanked your head up off the mattress, allowing him to snarl right into your ear, “Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this?” 

A harsh slap of your ass resonated throughout the room, sound bouncing off the walls. _Holy fuck._

“How long...” Voice grew angrier. “How long I’ve watched you flirt with fucking lowlifes right in front of my eyes?”

When you whimpered in whiplash, he denied any sympathy. Unsettling. “Answer me, baby.” 

There was no way to answer him. With his relentless spanking and hair-pulling, your brain could not formulate - mouth could not speak - any words. You could only cry out desperately. He was shameless in savoring it. 

A low chuckle, “Speechless, huh?” 

“L - Levi…” Another spank. “ _Ahh!_ It - It…!” _Stings, hurts, burns…_

“Feels good?”

That too.

When you nodded against the bed, he snickered, “It’s about to feel even better, sweetheart.” _Better than anyone else can make you feel._

With a firm palm still at your nape, he used his other hand to undress you both. First, he unbuckled his belt and tore it out from under the loops. Next, he pulled the waistbands of his underwear and skinny jeans down, just enough to free his sprung member. Finally, he yanked your panties down to your ankles, forcing his gaze below. Only now did he realize: both of you still had your thick black boots on, legs covered by tight stockings and black pants respectively. His dick dripping so much precum, harder than ever before, he barely recognized himself. A low chuckle sent chills down your spine, your shivering easily noticed. 

There was no one more overprotective of you than Levi. No one was quicker to come to your aid and shove boys off of you. You always felt safe in his presence. Yet, the nerves were undeniable now. Suspense in your eyes, you turned back to your partner. 

When he toyed with you earlier, you assumed he was cool and collected. When you laid eyes on him now though, physicality gave clues to his true state. Chest heaved both heavily and rapidly. Even in this darkness, you could still make out the blush in his face. Steel grey eyes attempted to look stern, but you knew him well enough, you were not blind to the glimmer of vulnerability. When he licked and bit down his lips, you wondered if the motion was natural or forced for you. At your seductive sight, he did not know either. 

The stimulation was so much, he could not wait any longer. Shaky hands held his member at your entrance. Breathless, he teased, “Are you ready, baby?”

Mustered up a tinge of courage, you snapped back, “I am. I don’t think you are though, seeing as you’ve been stalling for so long.” _Years in fact._

Levi grit his teeth. _Tch… you little punk!_ Without any hesitation, he shoved his throbbing member all the way back into you, you had practically dared him to at this point. Despite arousals aching from anticipation, both of you gasped at the immense sensation. Your dripping wet pussy, his rock solid cock were both too good to each other. A perfect match.

Right after entering, he had already thrown his head back in pleasure. Heart pounded in his chest, but you felt so fucking good, he could not help but start pumping. 

The moment he broke into you was the moment your cheeks started to sting from the spanking. A tingling in your core, a tingling on your skin: _perfect timing._

You had always thought that his singing voice could never be beaten, but then there was the dirty talk. Once you accepted that as the best, there was now this god-given blend of low grunts and light gasps. Singing to teasing to breathing. Kissing to foreplay to penetration. _He just gets better and better._

“Mmm… your cunt is so tight and so - and so -” stunned inhales interrupted his sentiment, “so fucking wet.” Voice trailed on the last syllable.

Levi drilled into you so aggressively, your entire body was bouncing on the bed. When your angelic voice shook from the motion, it pushed him to fuck you even harder. 

That telltale feeling - the tickling heat deep inside, the cascading wave of pleasure, the pulsing of your pussy - you knew you were close. Bruised neck, licked nipples, raw cheeks, he had done you just right. With this merciless fucking, he had given you all you could take. 

Sloppy tongue stumbled over his name as eyes rolled back into your head, _“L - Le’viii! I’m… I’m...!”_

Through grit teeth, he grumbled, “Tell me!” While he tried to maintain his steadfast dominance, he knew he was getting close too. A pleading gasp, “Tell me, brat!”

Fingers desperately clutched the sheets, “I’m.. gon’na… _I’m gonna…! nguhh…”_

_So fucking close._ Command, urgency, begging caused Levi to raise his voice, unknowingly heightening your climax, “Gonna cum, baby?”

_“Y - Yes!”_

_“All over my dick, baby?”_

_“Heh - yeah!”_ Your orgasm took over your entire being, without a second of pause, mouth gasped in repetitions of his name, sighs of pleasure, overstimulated cries, more and more and more of his name.

Little did you know: that was the last bit he not only needed, but could take as well. An impossibly fast jerked him to orgasm. He had masturbated to this scene countless times before, but here in the moment, this release was better than all of those combined. 

His warm strands shot far into you, mixing with your own fluids. Climaxing together - the way your walls seized around him, the way his dick pulsed inside you - it was a feeling you both instantly recognized: you would have to chase it again in the future.

However cruel he could be in sex, he cared for you so greatly, practically worshipping the ground you walked on. Completely weak in the knees, he still thought of you first. _I’ve worn her out enough._ An arm around your back pulled you close as Levi collapsed at your side. 

Faced with each other, both breathless and panting, he brushed flopped hair out of your face and gave a tender kiss. _The perfect mix of good guy and bad boy._ When you kissed him back, he felt it was all he would ever need, you were all he could ever ask for.

_My love,_ “I should’ve confessed sooner.” 


	21. Let's Go to the Beach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beach may be the last place he wants to go, but there is nothing he would not do, nowhere he would not go for you.

**I decided to make this fluffy, but I will probably make a ~~sex~~ smut on the beach follow-up later ^^ Please enjoy!**

**WC: 1900 words  
Tags: fluff, modern au**

_Let’s go to the beach._

_Unbelievable._ Of all places you could choose to spend a weekend, you had to pick the beach. Dirty sand, loud kids, tons of people, vast ocean… it was far from his first choice. However, you had been begging him to go for so long, he decided it would be less annoying to spend the day there than it would to hear you ask one more time. 

Even in getting ready, he was rather clueless. You had told him you had everything taken care of, but he still had to get dressed. When he came to the front door in sneakers, blue jeans, and a long sleeved tee, you could not help but ask, “Levi, honey, do you remember where we’re going today?”

He clenched his teeth, “Yeah, of course I remember, brat.” He folded his arms, “That place with grainy sand and filthy ocean.”

“The beach!”

He sighed, “The beach.”

In your shorts, tank top, swimsuit underneath, you looked him up and down, “I’d say you’re not dressed for it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the sand will stick to you. Salt water will stain your clothes. Not to mention, you’re going to burn up in that outfit.”

“Tch…” As much as he hated getting dirty, he hated getting hot and sweaty too. Still, he stayed stubborn, too embarrassed to change now, “I’ll be fine.”

You shrugged, “If you say so.”

At long last, your dream day was underway.

// // //

On the ride over, you could already pick up his sense of dread. The dull in his eyes, the sulking in his seat, the strained effort he put into looking less than miserable for you, still - you were not giving up on a good day yet.

The full parking lot was the first annoyance, “Geez, seems like a lot of people had the same idea.” 

You would not let his grumpiness rain on your parade, “Not the most crowded I’ve seen.” _Quick, change the subject._ “Help me carry the stuff?”

“Right.” Levi popped the trunk, took a deep breath, and left the vehicle. An umbrella, a cooler, beach towels, a tote bag… “We need all this stuff?”

You giggled, “Hah - I don’t. I brought it for you.” 

Levi raised an eyebrow, beckoning for an explanation. You placed a hand on his shoulder and tilted your head, “Listen… I know I’ve been nagging about this forever, and I know it’s been annoying. I wanna tell you: I really appreciate you coming out here for me. The least I could do is pack what would make you feel comfortable.”

He gulped, finally realizing how shitty his attitude had been, all without good reason. “I understand.”

A quick kiss on the forehead. “Thank you, love.”

_Anything for you._

// // //

All the makings for a fun beach day in hand, the two of you began hauling the goods from the car to the shore.

Strangely empty at your side, you turned back to find your boyfriend far behind. You stopped in your tracks and called back to him, “Too heavy?” 

“No! Of course not.” _Pull it together. For her…_ It’s just…”

You glanced down to his shoes. Not even halfway there, they were already overflowing with sand. These tied-up sneakers would keep it trapped inside all day. He was not angry, but looked genuinely disheartened. 

It was time, you decided. “Here. Take this.” You gestured your packed tote to him. 

Levi took the bag out of your hand and peered inside. _A change of clothes?_

When he looked back to you, you gave a knowing smile, “I told you. I’ve got it all taken care of!” 

It did not quite coax the smile you were hoping for, but you could tell he felt some relief. “Guess you know better than I.”

“Don’t worry about it.” A brief side hug before you met his gaze, “Let’s just have some fun, okay?”

His mouth still a straight line, you gave a little lenience, “Or at least try?”

An assuring tousle of your hair, “Deal.”

And when he pulled his shirt off, by the collar and over the back, you were reminded why you dragged him out here. Hot summer sun reflected off his already-perspiring chest. Black locks were topped with a golden glow. The blue of his eyes matched that of the ocean. His annoyed apprehension about the day was more than worth the view.

Your staring was not unnoticed. As he unbuckled his belt, he teased, “Is this what we came here for?”

You snickered, “Maybe…”

Levi kicked off his shoes and took off his jeans. In all his inexperience with the beach, you expected to see underwear. Instead, European swim trunks. You had no idea he even owned any, and they fit so well. When your eyes widened, he teased, _“tsk tsk tsk._ So shameless…” 

“This outfit is much better.” _for more than just the environment._

A brief smirk before he questioned, “No sandals?”

You dusted off his sneakers and tossed them in the bag, “You won’t need ‘em.”

At first unsettling, he started to warm up towards the feeling of hot sand under his feet. The natural cushion that was both soft and supportive, it was something to be sought after. At last, he understood at least one appeal of the beach.

And though there were many people, the area was so vast that it felt completely uncrowded. When he looked ahead, there was nothing but ocean and sand for as far as the eye could see. You, your flowing hair, your skimpy swimsuit in the foreground, endless sun in the background, he had to admit, _what a sight._

You turned and asked, “How about here?”

Finally, a smile as he snapped out of his daydream, “Your call.”

Such a drastic change in attitude, you had no idea what caused it. As much as you wanted to know, you figured you should tread lightly. Maybe you could hear about it at the end of the day. 

After spreading out beach towels and opening up the umbrella, you were quick to lay on top of the blanket and underneath the shade. Levi stood above you for a few moments, not sure of the plan. Laid back in position and breathing, you looked practically asleep.

“Hey,” He knelt down and nudged you, “so what do you want to do?”

You tilted your shades down, “I’m doing it.”

He arched a brow, “Sleeping?”

“Relaxing.” You rubbed his arm, “You should try it sometime!”

He tightened his jaw. Sure, you and countless others seemed to be having no trouble, but this was so unfamiliar to him, he could not imagine closing his eyes right now. 

When you dozed off once again, he opted against joining you in favor of watching. After all, his sleeping beauty only bettered the view.

Your lookout. Your scout.

// // //

You woke up to two strong hands on your body, caressing and rubbing your skin. 

“Mmm… Levi?”

“Hey, did I wake you up?”

“No. No.” _Yes._ “What’s up?”

He lifted his hands off you, revealing creamy white palms, “Well, the sun moved, I didn’t want you to get burned.”

You smiled, _He’s getting the hang of it!_ “You’re too sweet. Thank you.”

Levi cleared his throat, “So… I was thinking… do you wanna go in the water?”

Thank God for your shades. Eyes shot open at his suggestion. You thought you would have to persuade him or maybe even save it for next time - if there would ever be one. Instead, he was bringing up the idea to you.

“Yeah! You want to?”

In the time you were asleep, he watched nearly every patron swim in the ocean. If children and the elderly were going in, certainly he could too, certainly there was something he was missing. “Yes…” He swallowed, “I want to.”

“Well, what are we waiting for?” You sprung up from the towel, “You should’ve woken me up sooner.”

Leaving him in the dust, you began a clumsy run through the sand. Upon wading in the water, that childlike wonder crashed into you along with the waves. Something about the beach always managed to excite, no matter how many times you had gone.

No hesitation. Your energy and enthusiasm were contagious. Caught up in the moment, Levi swept you off your feet bridal style and walked you deeper into the water. In this position, he was only wet at the hips and below while you were completely soaked everywhere. When he spun you in his arms, ring of water splashing around you both, you found yourselves giggling uncontrollably. 

The two of you were in absolute bliss, until he felt a faint tickle on his leg, “… Wh-What the hell?” Clearly uneasy.

“What? What?”

“I just felt something brush up against me. What was that?” 

You shrugged and offered, “I don’t know. Seaweed, minnows, fish, or something?”

Levi clenched his teeth, barring the sound of his sharp inhale. Before you could question the motion, he turned and ran you both back to shore. 

“L - Levi?!” His panic was so hilarious, but you knew you had to muffle any signs.

“ _Guhh!_ That shit is so gross!” The cold fresh out of water or the thought of those poisonous creatures, he clutched his arms and shuddered. 

_Oh no…_ After all that fun, you could not imagine turning him off from the beach now. “Hey! Let’s head back to our spot. We’ll dry off.”

Utter fear still written on his face, “Sure.”

You rubbed his back, muscle coated in seawater. _Goosebumps… adorable…_ As you approached your site, you did a quick little jog to beat him there, just so you could toss him his towel. How much you wanted him to enjoy himself, he definitely picked up on it. With your care, he had subconsciously forgotten all about that seaweed scare. _She’s so cute._

“Oh! I almost forgot, I packed something for you.” You hurriedly bent down to the cooler, fumbling a bit, before pulling out a can. 

Black iced tea drew a cheeky grin, “For me?”

With a smirk and a clang, “Cheers.”

“Cheers.”

Watching him gulp down that cold drink, especially shirtless and in swim trunks, you were enamored with the sight. When he pulled his lips from the can with a refreshed _ahh_ , you thought you might melt right with that condensation.

“So what do you think?”

This horizon of the sunset and ocean, the warm orange and pink a perfect match to the foam white and blue, he had to admit, “It’s not bad.”

“I thought you might like it… It was on sale!”

 _Huh? She’s talking about… the drink?_ His response only a stammer.

You looked to him. The thrill in your eyes all too endearing, “So whaddya say? More tomorrow?”

Levi wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his side, “Yeah.”

_Could never say no to you._


	22. Let's go get Away (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A secluded cave on the coast, off the shore, away from everyone but each other. How could you not make the most of this?

**WC: 1100 words Tags: smut, 18+, slightly public setting, fem reader**

_Let’s go get away._

That long walk on the beach - sunset, seashore, serenity - it led you to this secret: a hidden little cave. The pent-up passion you both felt, you both said you would “just check it out”, you both knew you would do more than that. 

The second you were in seclusion was the second you threw yourselves onto each other. In light of the horizon, bodies pressed together in a deep kiss. Tongues were quick to swim together, tasting salty remnants of ocean water that blended perfectly with soft lips. You threw your hands in each other’s hair, both drenched and sandy from the day’s excursion. Strong arm around your back, hand at your shoulder, he walked you back into the obsidian wall. 

You kissed and kissed and kissed him, briefly pulling back just to plead, “Fuck me, Levi.” You gasped, “Please...”

A flash of _Here? Now?_ was just that - a flash. The anticipation and desire for you had been building all day. Even if it was wrong, it just felt so right. 

He trailed his tongue past your lips, down your jawline and neck. His mind had already been made up, but he had to hear more, “You sure?”

Heightening arousal made it hard to think coherently, even harder to speak, “Y - Yes.”

He instantly turned you around, bent you over at the hips, and yanked your swimsuit aside, revealing your yearning wet vulva. He tugged his trunks down just enough to pull out his already-hardened and leaking wet member. When he touched his tip to your lips, he dwindled outside. There was no need to sensualize his voice, he had been waiting all day, “This is what you want, baby?”

_Goddamn tease._ “ _Levi..._ please hurry! Give it to me!”

Levi bit his teeth. He absolutely adored when you got slutty like this. He loved to hear you beg for it, but he could not deny you nor himself a moment more. A rapid push past your folds. Walls instantly clenched around him. 

_“Fuck! Oh, fuck...”_ Your pussy was so good to him, warm velvet inside. _“_ You’re so wet...” 

His voice was so captivating, you had to see the figure behind it. Turning back, he looked better than you could have ever imagined. Levi Ackerman, shirtless, dripping in salt water and sweat, backlit by ocean sunset, wet bangs clung to his face, expression increasingly desperate with each and every thrust. His appearance alone was enough to get you off.

An enamored gasp escaped your lips. The acoustics of the cave both amplified and echoed your sounds of pleasure, but only for your ears. The beach was free of people, but still, anyone outside your hollow would be unable to hear the shameful noises inside. It was the perfect place.

Consciously or not, you just had to make the most of this. You kept your head turned back and stared, allowing him to take in your sight as well. Sopping strands of hair flung across your shoulders, curves coated in orange glow, tight and skimpy swimsuit squeezed all the right places. He had to blink twice, _She’s too good to be true._

He leaned forward, pressing all of his front to your back. Whispering into your ear resulted in a completely new phenomenon. The echoes of his hushed voice bounced off the walls, amplifying the volume while maintaining his light tone. Unbeknownst to each other, you both realized just how amazing this sound space was and just how much it could rile up the other. 

Levi reached a hand under your spandex, cupping and massaging your misted breast as he kept his lips to your ear, “Does it feel good, baby?”

When you could only muster a stammer, he both begged and demanded, “Tell me.”

“Y-Yeah! It _feels-!”_ A sudden pinch of your nipple. _“Oh, Levi!”_

_Fuck._ Both of your voices were far too sexy for the other to handle. Left hand squeezed even harder. Right hand gave a swift spank before throwing itself into your hair. Gripping your wet locks, he pulled you whichever way he desired, giving even more leverage in penetration. 

His fucking was ravenous. Pulsating cock reached far back into you as his pace accelerated rapidly. Your jaws hung open, releasing weakened grunts of pleasure. You both knew: your peaks were quickly nearing. 

_Make the most of it._ You pushed your palms off the black slate of the cave, allowing his tip to collide with your end, instantly forcing shocked gasps from the both of you _._ This inch of deviance was the last either of you could take. 

“ _Fuck! Oh, baby...”_ Just when he thought you could not get any better, you had surprised him once again with this overstimulating push. _“Sh’it! Oh, shit...!”_

With his breathless cries came the warm cum you craved. Hot white ejaculate shot into your pussy, some dripping down your thighs with each thrust in and out. Once steady hand twitched against your nipple, the other gripped and released your hair as he jerked through his orgasm, physically demonstrating his helplessness to you. 

Head thrown back, saliva flowing out his mouth, muscles flinching through sensation, chest heaving in desperation, all on this beautiful beach, it was too hot to handle. Uncontainable drools and sighs as you watched him ride his wave, the sight alone was enough to make you cum.

In his haze, he picked up on it. You needed to feel what he felt. Hasty hand snapped from your nipple to your clit. Slippery fingers dove past your bottoms and gave those perfect rotations, as he had countless times before, that he always knew would get you there.

“ _Oh! Oh my God!_ Levi! _Nguhh...”_ Inadvertently shouting. 

_“Cum for me.”_ He circled faster, “ _I know you can do it, baby...”_

_“_ I - _I’m...!”_

Furious rubbing would have gotten you there, but not soon enough for him. He moved his mouth to your neck, lips sucking, teeth grazing, tongue licking, voice uttering, “Be a good girl. _Cum all over me and my fucking fingers.”_

And that was it. _“I’m cumming!”_

From your sweet spot through your entire being, warm honey coursed through your veins. That incredible, indescribable feeling that only he could give you. As you rode your waves, you stumbled over repetitions of his name. Sometimes, only managing the first syllable. Your pathetic attempts at calling for him drew a satisfied snicker, _So fucking cute._

The crashing tides just out there symbolized the waves of pleasure you just experienced in here. 

_Sex on the beach._


	23. I have nightmares too

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who better to wake up beside when that recurring nightmare strikes?

**WC: 1800 words  
Tags: hurt-comfort, angst turned fluff, fem-reader (readers, please feel free to ask me for a gender-neutral edit!)**

_Shit… not again…_

No matter how many times you had experienced it, that recurring nightmare never failed to frighten you. The terror you had slept with since that day somehow managed to scare you each time more than the last. Just when you forgot about your arch-nemesis was always the night it seemed to come back, catching you off guard every time.

Even within the dream, though you knew the situation was impossible, you could not shake yourself from thinking it was your reality. Faced with the same threat for the hundredth time, you still found yourself attempting the same solution for the hundredth time as well. That solution you knew would fail, you watched yourself try it again in both the first and third person. Not only were you helpless in combating the terror, you were helpless in stopping your response as well.

_It’s gonna get me! It’s gonna-!_

Right when it was about to, your entire body jolted. The lightning strike transition from the dream world to the real world had you in whiplash. When your eyes shot open, the pitch-black darkness compounded your fear. You tossed and turned, trying to familiarize yourself with your location, _Where am I? Did it catch me?_

Limbs numb, asleep, motionless despite your will, you started to hear your heartbeat pounding in your chest. _Why can’t I move at all?!_

First, your fingers came back, grazing and recognizing your bedsheets. Eyes adjusted to the darkness, barely making out the landscape of your room. Ears quickly forgot the sounds of your nightmare to pick up the fan, crickets, and snores in reality.

At last, you realized: _I’m in my bed. It’s late at night. I had that nightmare again._

Though you were fully aware by now that it was only just a dream, you could not convince yourself to recover from it. Your heart was racing, body drenched in a cold sweat, whimpers invariably sneaking past your lips even as you told yourself, _It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream._

You thought it over: were you strong enough to tough it out or would you have to wake your sleeping partner?

Within seconds, though, the choice was taken out of your hands. The moment he heard your cries, your insomniac shot up out of sleep, immediately and instinctively reaching out to check on you.

At first, he felt panic, “Hey! What’s wrong?” You were not one to cry, much less scream out loud in the middle of the night. _If she’s screaming…_ he instantly feared the worst.

Levi reached a frantic arm to his nightstand, fumbling a bit before turning on the light. A trained scan up and down, he realized it was nothing physical. A stable hand on your back, his voice softened a bit, “Hey…”

Now that he was awake, you could go to him without any worry of waking him up. Even if not for his rise, though, you would not be able to hold yourself back regardless. You flipped over to face him, promptly burying your face in his side. At your sudden contact, he was quick to throw his arms around you. “I’ve got you. I’ve got you…”

A tinge of pain as his eyes adapted from natural darkness to artificial light, his pain was all but ignored, all attention on you.

With white knuckles, you clutched his cotton tee to your face, taking in deep sniffs of his scent. Past the ringing in your ears, you could only hear his steady breathing. Entire body tensed against his, shakiness subdued by his solid muscle.

His scent, his breathing, his touch… he really was here. As if he could read your mind, he reminded you as he always did, “I’m here. I’m here.”

Even though you sobbed even louder, shook even harder, they were only signs that he was doing exactly what you needed him to. “You’re okay. I’ve got you.” His calm cooing always managed to soothe you no matter the circumstance.

Without your explicit explanation, he was well-aware of what had happened. Not long after you started sleeping together, these nightmares worked their way into your routine.

His sweetheart, crying and shaking when she was supposed to be fast asleep, it was absolutely heartbreaking. He would always be here for you, that was no question, but there was only so much more he could stand to watch.

Levi placed a gentle hand underneath your chin, tilting you up to meet his gaze, “What do you need?”

A lump in your throat, “I - I don’t know…”

“Can I make you some tea?”

You nodded, at which he promptly rose from the bed.

And though you had given him the nod, you were once again flooded with panic at the thought of him leaving. After a few hasty reaches, you clutched his sleeve, “N - No! Please…” You sobbed, “Please don’t leave me alone.”

Levi held your hand tightly. “Did you forget? You’re coming with me.”

// // //

As Levi brewed the tea, you held his hand throughout the entire process. Suddenly, the house you had shared for years seemed frightening. Deep inside, you knew that in the presence of humanity’s strongest, you were protected from anything and everything. Still, hand-holding undoubtedly helped.

The two of you walked around the kitchen in silence, finding the tea kettle, boiling the water, wiping the mugs, preparing the tea bags. He of course knew what kind you would want at this hour. Most nights, he would never think to drink black tea at this hour. However, desperate times called for desperate measures. Silently, he picked the caffeinated tea for himself. A subtle demonstration of his devotion to you: he would stay up for you no matter what it took.

His choice did not go unnoticed, drawing an appreciative smile to yourself. When he steeped your tea, added milk and sugar to your liking, and burned his hands carrying both of your mugs, his affection was only conveyed all the more.

The lights in the living room were inducing a headache. Fluorescent bulbs should never be allowed at this hour, though he would make an exception for your comfort. In fact, your vehement defense of keeping the lights on always managed to draw a smirk.

Cuddles, touch, cups of tea, there was one thing left to do in your grounding routine. At last, he opened up, reminding you that he had nightmares too. He always felt that his past was too grotesque for such a cute thing like you. Therefore, he spoke of his trauma vaguely and briefly. However, his obvious efforts to conceal his pain from you actually did the opposite of his intention. Levi was blunt about most things, including sensitive topics. If he deemed against revealing his past, _it must be something really bad._

So, tonight, you once again heard his hollow recollection. You once again filled in the blanks. His storytelling was comforting in many ways. For one, it deepened your relationship. No one had ever heard his whole story, no one had ever been told as much as you. Secondly, he reminded you that you were not alone in your feelings. Everyone has nightmares, fears, trauma, including him. _You are not alone._ Finally, his voice. Waves lightly tickled your ears as his tone soothed them. You could listen to him talk for hours, you often did, and it could solve all the world’s problems.

All of a sudden, your mug was empty. Come to think of it, his was too. _Just how long have we been chatting?_

You glanced up to your lover. Eyes drooping, skin pale, face sullen, he was clearly exhausted. While he was not yawning or dozing off, you saw his slow blinking and felt his deep breathing. He already did not get enough sleep as is, and now your nightmare was robbing him even more. Immense guilt an immense weight.

You reached an arm over his abdomen and lay your face on his chest, “Levi…” Tears fell, dampening his shirt, “I’m sorry.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m sorry about my nightmare.”

Levi pet the top of your head, “Don’t apologize for something out of your control.” Though his tone seemed disciplinary, internally, he was sorry for you. If there was anyone who did not deserve to have such wretched recurring nightmares, it was the adorable bundle in his arms.

 _But it is in my control. I could have dealt with it better, without bothering you._ “No, I mean… I’m sorry I woke you up from it.”

A strong hand was careful in interlacing his fingers with yours. Sleep was amazing, but nothing could compare to cuddles with you, even if it stemmed from misfortune. With reassurance, he muttered, “This isn’t so bad.”

Despite his sentiment, your guilt never wavered. Weak hand caressed his shoulder, thumb tracing the outline of his muscle, “It’s just… an insomniac like you shouldn’t have to put up with night terrors from someone like m-”

Suddenly, a tight hand squeezed your jaw. Levi pulled you to his lips as quickly as he could. With his energy nearly drained, it was not too fast at all.

Lingering caffeine, surprising kiss, whatever it was sent jolts through your entire being, these ones much more welcome than the ones from earlier in the night.

Both of you were more than just tired, it was that absolutely depleted late-night fatigue. Bodies begged for your return to sleep, but you both neglected your energy, spending the last of it in prioritizing the other.

Levi pulled you from his lips, looking into your eyes briefly before tugging you to his chest, _“Shh… it’s nighttime.”_

// // //

At last, you had returned to peaceful sleep. After countless nights together, he was well-attuned to your signs.

_Let’s get you to bed._

A steady pace supported your entire body, only the bounce of his footsteps managed to wake you. He had almost managed to get you there without waking you up, but when he saw your fluttering eyes, felt your tiny stir, and heard those tired moans, he could not say he was at all disappointed.

Eyes half-shut in sleep, you gazed up to your carrier. Backlit by low light, somewhat of a halo glowed above your angel. “Levi?”

Steel grey eyes looked down to you, “Yeah?”

You did not know where he was taking you, but you did not care. I trust you so much.

A weak swallow, “Please… don’t ever leave me alone.”

With a gentle lift, Levi rested your head on his shoulder, allowing him to whisper into your ear.

“I would never dream of it.”


	24. Midnight Sister

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erwin’s sister is conflicted when her crush lets him die. Little does she know, Levi is too.

**WC: 3300 words**

**Tags: Heavy angst, grief, swearing, angst turned fluff**

_In those passing seconds, his mind raced through all that was at stake, all the implications, and all the consequences of his choice. You were among them._

// // // 

It was hard to believe that the day had finally come. The mission to retake Wall Maria was commencing today, this evening, right now, actually. It was hard to fathom for everyone, but you felt yourself especially. Your brother, the commander. Your crush, humanity’s strongest soldier. The two most important people in your life were leaving for an expedition that would attempt the impossible. You could only stay back, not even watch, and pray for their return home, their success if you were really lucky. 

Far off, you saw them coming. You had waved him off countless times before, yet, hearts fluttered each time. Levi always made sure to ride on that one side, you always made sure to stand on that one side, all in an effort to see each other one more time. This tiny little ritual could do so much for both of you. 

Seemingly simple routines that were actually well thought out, they were how you displayed your feelings for the other. Departures and returns, post-mission debriefs and weekend tea times, such small interactions over the years were far bigger than face value, slowly but surely conveying your affections and deepening your relationship. 

Here and now was another. Undeniable pride as you watched your brother lead the brigade. Not far behind him - though far from you - Levi had already found his admirer in the same spot you were always in, just another way you made his life easier. As Erwin passed, you played the little sister, “Go get ‘em, bro!” As Levi passed, a stark change. Affection could not be so obvious if he was to keep face, but his simple nod and slight smile for you, your sparkling gaze and folded hands to him, were more than enough. 

In both slowmotion and an instant, you watched the wings of their capes grow smaller and smaller in the distance. It was a sharp pain that never got easier no matter how many times you had gone through it. There was a distinct difference about today, however. Such an intense mission had riled up the citizens likewise. The exceptional roar of the crowd, by far the loudest of all departures you had witnessed, was representative of how you felt inside: screaming as that separation grew and grew. 

Before you knew it, the scouts had boarded the elevators. Now, they were all just specks, but you could still recognize your two special soldiers. It was only now that you noticed that your lip had been twitching, tears had been forming. When they rose in the sunset, it was as if they were ascending to heaven. _Who knows? After tonight, they might be._ Tears blurred your eyes, further illustrating the illusion. 

As he stepped off the elevator and onto the outside, he finally recognized the massive wall between you now, one that he may never see the other side of ever again. Which would mean, he may never see you, ever again.

As soon as you were out of sight of the other, it was the moment you both simultaneously realized:

_If I get the chance, I have to tell them how I feel._

// // // 

He left with one duty and came back with another. Since that mission, everything had changed. This new confession he would have to make was one that would thwart the other. 

It was the first time he dreaded heading back. Even as he was injecting Armin, he already recognized that everyone would think he made the wrong choice, but he did not care about everyone. You were the one that mattered most, the only one that mattered at all. If all others ridiculed, reprimanded, reprehended him for the rest of his life, he could stomach it. If you resented him, though, he could not. 

// // //

All the while they were gone, your wait felt both a second and an eternity. Your haze was interrupted by those brassy bells. They were always startling, but always welcomed, for it meant that they had come back. The ringing had special significance today, for you had recognized the possibility of no return at all.

That tall golden figure you expected to lead, he was nowhere to be seen. Instead, Hange was the sole individual at the front. Your heart seized with worry, yet still could not fathom the worst. You never could have imagined it.

_Maybe he’s just injured?_ A regular sight. Every return had at least one cart full of injured, sometimes more, at the back of the formation. To think that he had been hurt, it felt like a stab in the heart, but at least the recapture had been successful. _Yeah, of course… he must be back there._

But wait. 

You leaned forward, trying to see down farther down the line, but there was nothing more to see. 

_9? Just 9?_ Two harsh blinks, a rub of your eyes, you had to be seeing wrong. A head count:

Hange. Eren. Mikasa. Armin. _Huh, didn’t think he’d make it back._

Jean. Sasha. Conny. 

Floch. _That newcomer, didn’t think he’d come back either._

Levi. 

That was it. 9. No one else, not even an extra horse.

All the times before, his approach felt a crawl. This time though, a blur. Before you could react, Levi was right in front of you. Instead of his usual weak and tired smile, a weak and tired frown. Instead of your regular excitement, never-before-seen fear. You looked into each other’s eyes for an unknown amount of time. No words were exchanged, but expressions said it all: he had lost his friend, you had lost your brother, the regiment had lost its commander. 

While the rest of the world raced, you were stuck in a pause, one you would never recover from.

// // //

By the time of the ceremony, you had not snapped back in the slightest. It had been days, but felt like years. It had been days, but felt like minutes. You were so slow in recovery, the thought, _Will I ever feel fine again?_ had yet to cross your mind. 

This was your first time seeing others since your interaction with Levi that day. Of course, being Erwin’s sister, no one was keen to talk to you. Whether it was because they did not know what to say or because they were more interested in hearing from the heroes, none of the hundreds there sought you out. Did you want solitude or want sympathy? You did not quite know yourself, but when it came to your loneliness, Levi knew how he felt. 

There was little he could do, though. Wrapped up in formalities, obligations, the procession, he could not make his way to you no matter how much he wanted to, at least, not until this was all over. 

After hours of standing against that lone pillar, it was time to take seats. No reserved spot for you, you found yourself towards the back, seated next to another nobody. 

You took a deep huff. Sitting there, having to watch politely as Levi not only kissed Historia’s hand, but more importantly, as he received that honorary medallion. _Like hell he deserves it._

By now, you had heard the testimony of all that had happened in that fateful mission. When you heard Levi’s account, though, you felt your world had been turned upside down. Any other death could be recovered from. With your brother in the Scout Regiment, you had prepared yourself for the possibility - no - reality of his death to the titans. What you never could have expected, however, was his death at the hands of humans. _Levi, of all people…_

On promise that he would take down the Beast Titan, Levi looked him in the eyes and told him to give up on his dreams and die. When Erwin obliged, his strategic mind and heroic sacrifice gave Levi the golden opportunity. Somehow, Levi failed to pull through, letting the Beast Titan slip out of his hands and away to safety.

It was no question that Levi was disappointed with his escape, but that did not cut it. _A promise is a promise,_ it was his and his fault alone that it got away.

And even then, when the last able-bodied soldier brought Erwin to him, when presented with Erwin’s miraculous survival through that barrage of boulders, when persuaded relentlessly on why Erwin should be revived, he still made the wrong choice. 

Levi announced to everyone that he was reviving Erwin, and thus, everyone fled his side in understanding. His cunning mind had manipulated all of them to leave him alone so that he could betray humanity and carry out his own personal mission successfully. Such evil manipulation, you could not imagine... 

Witnessing his distinction, watching the medal fall over his shoulders, it was beyond the last straw. You could not bear to see anymore. A clear stand out among the audience, you stood from your seat and pardoned yourself out of the aisle, leaving in a huff for your room.

// // //

In all the hubbub, chaos, reactions to the expedition, Levi felt that the proper attention had been lost. Such prolonged formal interaction would normally be followed by introverted isolation. Instead, he neglected his routine, prioritizing you over himself.

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

There was no question of who it could be, still, he let you know, “It’s me.”

You had been ignoring him for days, yet, you knew you would have to confront him sooner or later. This was as good a time as any. A deep sigh, “Come in.”

Levi looked a bit silly entering. Cups of boiling tea in both hands, he resorted to lowering slightly and turning the handle with his elbow. His pace was slow, steps tiny, as he made for you, trying not to spill the hot liquids over the rims and onto his hands. Normally, you would tease him for such an awkward appearance, but you did not have it in you tonight.

Stoic, he handed you the cup. Gingerly, you took it from him, deliberately avoiding any accidental contact of his eyes or hands. The thought of touching him, the thought of him at all, disgusted you.

He sipped his tea, surprised that you did not as well. All prior tea times, you were quick to drink it down. Instead, you set your cup on the nightstand. Even though he had brought your favorite flavor, you showed no interest nor intent in enjoying it.

Moments passed. He was first to break the silence, “I hate those pointless ceremonies.”

You almost could not believe your ears. _I hate them more than you._

Levi brought a hand to his new jewelry, toying with it briefly, “What good does this do me?” 

You snickered. _What good do you do me?_

The way he fondled that necklace, even in the pitch black night, felt blinding. The glimmer of light reflecting off of it burned your eyes, it was all too much to handle.

At last, you spoke to him, “Could you cut that out?”

He froze abruptly, snapping his gaze to you. Eyes bore into each other, a small twitch in yours, complete still in his.

At last, he asked you, “What’s wrong?”

_Are you that stupid?_ “What do you mean ‘what’s wrong’?”

Levi remained still. This tone in your voice, he had never heard it before. You had always been so friendly with each other, but he sensed that was about to change, and he did not know how to prevent it. 

“You… You…” Stuttering over what you were about to admit to both Levi and yourself, “You killed him!” 

Levi put his hands in his pockets, slowly leaning back on your desk. Countless others had told him the same thing over the past few days, he should have expected the same - no - even more of a reaction from you. After some pause, he raised his gaze from the floor to your stare, “I let him rest.” 

You scoffed, “Yeah, sure. Tell yourself that,” _You piece of trash._ “He worked so hard for so many years, and you didn’t even let him achieve his dream after all that?”

_She’s just grieving_ , he tried to tell himself, but your obtuse perspective was becoming intolerable. He tried to remind you of his sacrifice, “After all that, you wanted him to work even more? Don’t you think he’d done enough for us?”

You folded your arms, stubborn, “No, I don’t.” 

Levi knit his brows, at which you ranted further, “Look at the mess we’re in, Levi! Are you really that blind? Helpless slaves to Marley and no experienced leadership.”

_Me? Them? No experience? You ignorant little…_ An anger once a candlewick, you were fanning it into a raging flame.

His speaking was irritating, but so was his silence. Truthfully, whether you acknowledged it or not, anything he did or did not do would only anger you further. At this point, he was irredeemable to you.

“He had more to do, Levi!” You were shouting at him now. You did not care.

Levi rolled his eyes and kept them off you. The sight of you now, not only did it give him a sour taste in his mouth, he felt downright sick to his stomach. “Seems like nothing is ever enough for you.”

You kept silent. The two of you felt so opposite, there was no way to make either of you see the other side. _What’s the fucking point?_

But when he stuck the knife back in, “Either you just don’t get it, or you’re really that heartless.” 

You would not, could not, sit there and take it. You stood from the bed, pointing at yourself. “Me? I’m the heartless one?” You drove your finger hard into his chest, “I’m not the one who doomed all of humanity for my own personal bullshit!”

Levi ignored your press, voice eerily level, “Listen,” _smartass,_ “I’ve saved it hundreds of times before that.”

In all your heated emotion, you could only muster a stammer. When you failed to respond, your quiet was taken as the go-ahead to rage. A menacing snarl, “And just what have you done?” 

Still, silence. 

Levi clenched his fists, arms straight down, invariably shaking in anger. The corner of his lip flicked down, brows knit, deep creases in his face were insight to the deep wrath within. He leaned forward, it felt like he was towering over you. Morally, he felt he was, “That’s right. Fucking nothing.” 

He practically spit on your face. “Nothing except being that ungrateful, selfish, stupid pain in the ass that you are - and always have been.” 

A cold shoulder, he turned away. The walk to you had been one of many tiny steps. The walk away from you was made in few large strides. With a harsh slam of the door, he left you, hoping never to return. 

// // //

Once again, someway somehow, life went on. Now that no one in the world cared about you, you realized how impossibly slow time could pass. While It had been so long since then, you lost your big brother, best friend, within such a short amount of time. _There is no joy anymore. There is no point anymore._

Hand propped underneath your chin, plain and bored expression, you gazed out the window. Maybe, for some, there was still happiness to be had. Children were playing in the streets. Families were packing for their long-awaited return home, one that never would have been possible without Erwin. While you felt immense ire towards that one soldier, you harbored no resentment towards the civilians, _Good for them._

You saw bliss, but overheard chaos. Through thin walls, the variable reactions regarding the reality of the world were loud in many ways. 

“We’re doomed!”

“It’s all just government propaganda!”

“What do we do now?”

_I’m glad Erwin isn’t here to deal with this._

A complete 180 from your prior feelings. Months ago, you wanted him to be here, felt he needed to be here. Now, though, you felt relief, even a hint of gratitude that he did not have to suffer anymore. He had suffered so much idiocracy, put so much strain on himself, a break was more than deserved, even if it was a permanent peace. The fact that your opinion had changed so much did not cross your mind. You were not thinking, only feeling. 

Suddenly, in the foreground, the Shiganshina trio passed by. You had only seen Armin a few times since the return to Shiganshina expedition. All those instances, he was weak, pitiful, sheepish, seemingly uncomfortable in his own skin. You felt no anger towards him either. In fact, you wished he would learn to live with himself. It was not his choice to be revived over Erwin. _It was Levi’s wrong choice._

_Wait._ All of a sudden, your head started to hurt, understanding everything all too clearly. The end of Erwin’s suffering, that end you were so thankful for, you never would have had that _if not for..._

It was as if the universe sensed your state. Sunlight reflected off of his black hair and straight onto you. Nature alerted you of his proximity. The window before the door, you saw him pass. The window past the door, nobody. You waited and waited until your heart leapt in your chest, _Did he stop here?_

You leaned forward in your seat, body remembering a pose it had not struck in a while. It was the first expedition you were not outside to meet him for. You gasped to yourself, practically tripping over your own two feet as you flung yourself from the sofa and to the front door. 

Whipping open the handle, you opened your front door to find Levi kneeling down at your doorstep. His gaze had been fixated below as he fiddled with his hands, but the sudden opening startled him. As if he had been caught, he froze instantly and brought his attention up to you, a nervous look in his eyes.

Looking below, a tiny wicker basket. An emerald glow: his medallion. A rock you had only seen in books: a seashell. A familiar package: your favorite flavor of tea.

Mouths hung agape as your eyes met. Suddenly, you were weak in the knees. Whether from the shakiness in your legs or longing to be with him, you collapsed to his level. As you fell, arms instinctively looped around his shoulders, at which he caught you in a strong hug. 

“Oh, Levi…” Tears fell down your face, falling on his cape and mixing with ocean water.

“Thank you, for everything.”


	25. I dare you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A punk like him seems too good to be true. He is going to impress her - whatever it takes.

**WC: 1500 words  
Tags: sfw, punk trope, modern au**

_After years of surviving the underground, nay - running it, he felt he knew the place like the back of his hand. That is until one night when he runs into someone who completely changes his view._

The underground three set out for another night downtown. 

Before joining up with Farlan and Isabel, Levi himself had never been one for the public scene. Deep down inside, he still was not. However, these ventures were the most efficient ways to secure the necessities: food, money, maybe even some tea if the establishment was cultured enough. Levi’s smug demeanor, Farlan’s baiting, Isabel’s enthusiasm, the killer trio always managed to strike a bet. Clueless challengers would size Levi up, his height and figure severely misleading of his true strength, and wager an enormous amount based on their perception of a surefire win. One arm wrestle, one punch, one lift, was all it took to win a stockpile that would last a week. Such little effort from him could earn so much for everyone, he was not selfish nor stupid enough to refuse. 

And so, they once again found themselves on the scene tonight. This weekend, a rock bar. They had to hop around from joint to joint, otherwise the patrons would become too familiar with their tactics and the strategy would be lost. 

No matter the venue, though, he could never stand the people inside. Before throwing himself into such a social competition, he needed a few minutes outside, alone hopefully.

// // //

While his crew found a table, Levi went out the back for some silent solitude.

However, he did not get even a second. Right when he stepped outside, you turned your head, “Hey.”

Levi knit his brows, What makes her think she can talk to me?

His all black outfit, spiked jewelry, numerous piercings were normally enough to scare anyone away, but yours were too. Simultaneously, you both realized: you were probably not all that different from each other. 

Still, you stood there, completely unphased by his stare. 

Just as he opened his mouth, about to try you, Isabel sprung out of the bar, “Levi!”

Her call interrupted him, forcing his glare to break for the first time since it started. Isabel pat Levi’s back playfully, “Did we make a new friend?”

“What? Of course not.”

Isabel rolled her eyes. While words said one thing, his body language said another. He would never stick around a stranger for this long, she knew there must be something special. 

She grabbed you by the wrist, “Come on! Let’s go inside!”

Anytime Isabel insisted on hanging with someone new, and she insisted a lot, Levi was always quick to say “no”. While maybe not explicitly, he always conveyed his rejection. Whether it was dragging them out of there, threatening words, or a simple death glare, interactions with strangers were always stopped before they started. Tonight, however, refusing you did not cross his mind. Consciously or unconsciously, he was intrigued. 

You played coy, “No, I should really get going.”

Levi folded his arms. He would hate to come on too strong, it was not in his nature, but he really _really_ wanted you to stick around for a while.

Thankfully, Isabel unknowingly begged you on his behalf, “Hey, seriously, we never meet cool people, especially not cool girls!” 

You shrugged, “Alright, fiiiiine…” You matched your tone to hers, putting a surprised light in her eye.

Isabel pumped her fist, “Yeah! Let’s go!” Her grip had never let up, she pulled you into the bar.

Levi followed behind, confidence in his stride, eagerness within. 

// // //

When you came back into the bar, you found Farlan with a bored expression - _What took you so long?_ \- but when he noticed this new girl attached to the group, he leaned back, relaxed, _This oughta be fun._

Isabel dragged you into the booth. Farlan - Isabel - you - Levi, seated in a semicircle. 

Farlan gave a quick glance to Levi, a routine in their time together, beckoning for his opinion. When Levi gave a slight nod, it was the go-ahead to ease up a bit: you had earned his trust. 

“Name’s Farlan.” 

Even through leather gloves, your handshake was sound. “Pleasure.” 

Levi kept his eyes on you. He liked what he saw, but he also liked what he heard. That beautiful voice of yours was kind on the ears, your short and sweet way of speaking maintained mystery, the combination left him craving more and more. A man of few words himself, he admired the sentiment you could convey so beautifully and so briefly.

It was a stark contrast to Isabel’s conventions. She was long-winded in introducing herself and everything under the sun. While Farlan contributed to the conversation, you and Levi were more content whispering to each other, playing a bit off footsie underneath the table. Though neither of you would ever admit to it, you were both content with this activity for however long the night went on. 

// // // 

While it felt like minutes, you must have been talking for hours.

“Leviiiiiiii!” Isabel whined. “Can you please hurry up? I’m hungry!”

Farlan teased, “Hah- are you kidding?” Though he seemed to be speaking to Isabel, when he made eye contact with you, you knew who exactly he was talking to, “We never diddle daddle this long. I think Levi -”

Levi interrupted him harshly, “If you say one more word, we are leaving with nothing.” 

“Farlan, shut up!” Isabel punched Farlan’s shoulder and pleaded, “Levi, can you?”

Despite the threat, Farlan pressed, “He’s not gonna, cause if he does…” Farlan pointed at you, no qualms of rudeness, “then we’re leaving here and leaving her too.”

“Not if she comes with us!” Isabel clutched your shoulder, “Hey, what do you say?”

You glanced to Levi. You had only just met him, but still, you sensed that he anticipated your answer, no matter how hard he tried to remain cool.

It was the perfect opportunity to please everyone. You played along, giving Levi a daring look, “If you win, I will.” 

It had been you toying with him, but his response of a wink got you right back. The other two seemed to miss your shudder, but at your riled state, Levi earned himself a smirk. 

“Well that’s that.” Farlan shot up a hand, “Drinks?”

A sizely man came over with a pitcher and four steins. When he set them at the table, Farlan laid an arm around the backrest, “Any chance these are on the house?”

The owner chuckled, “Yeah, right, same chance that you outmuscle me.” 

He gave a pinch of Farlan’s bicep, at which Farlan just took it. “What about my friend here?”

“Who, this guy?” The worker reached an arm over Levi and pointed a finger down. “Hah! Yeah, right! If that little guy can take down any one of my regulars, you get whatever you want, on the house.” His voice utterly mocking.

Levi pushed himself up from the table, “Deal.”

Levi shouldered off his leather jacket, tossing it back to you. The short eye contact he made conveyed, _Keep close watch._ Of his garment or his upcoming performance, you did not know. All you did know: the chills he gave you were fucking insane. You were punk alright, but still found yourself giving him a submissive glance, _As you wish._

Levi made for the bar, “Really takin’ the challenge, shorty?” The burly man laughed. 

Levi gave no response, only rolling up his sleeves. 

“Eh!” The owner ruffled a patron’s hair, “This is my guy!”

Your eyebrows knit in concern. This guy was well over a foot taller than Levi, maybe even twice his width. Levi was certainly intimidating, but even you doubted that he could best this man.

Nevertheless, he took his seat across from him. At which the owner clapped his hands together and rubbed. “This is gonna be good!”

The bartender pounded his fist against the counter three times, “Three! Two! One!”

Even from the booth, you could see something flicker in Levi’s eyes. An overwhelming seriousness and strength, all in a split second, that poor patron’s arm was flat against the counter before anyone could know what had happened.

Levi brushed his hands on his pants, “ _Tch…_ disgusting.”

Sans Farlan, Isabel, Levi, everyone’s jaws were to the floor, including yours. Isabel called, “Woo! Levi! That was better than ever!” 

_Better than ever?_ You wondered. It seemed like they had done this many times before, but tonight just happened to be the best time? _Was it because of me?_ You brushed off your conceit until Levi met your eyes in passion, confirming your theory.

Isabel carried the food, Farlan carried the drinks, leaving Levi’s hands free for you. “Let’s get outta here.”

// // //

The three boarded their bikes. A single pat behind him, Levi showed you exactly where you should be.

You flung a leg over each side and met your front with his back. It felt like such a close interaction for such a brief first meeting, yet, it felt so right. 

Still, Levi demanded more, “Hang on tight.” You obliged, pressing yourself even closer against him, setting your head on his shoulder.

Levi put his pedal to the medal, gunning it to take you home. Wind blowing in your hair, you felt you fit right in. Arms looped around his chest, Levi felt the same.


	26. Spanking and Bondage (NSFW)

**WC: 500 words  
Tags: NSFW, fem!reader**

Two short ropes, one around each wrist, linked you to the metallic bars of the headboard. Levi had been so insistent on buying a bed frame with bars. Now bound to this very furniture, you had a feeling you finally learned why. You snickered, _what foresight._ Past a slight blur in your eyes, you scanned the threads of your bondage. Maybe you could have ripped out of them if you wanted to, but that was the thing, not a shred of you wanted to break free from his control. 

Your compliance - no - enjoyment, he easily picked up on it. Your enamored moans, glistening folds, the evidence was obvious. Levi pressed his front to the curve of your back and snarled in your ear, “Enjoying this, huh?” 

Before you could answer, he spanked you again - hard. A breathy groan fell past your lips and was sweet on his ears. That gasp of yours answered better than words could. 

You turned over your shoulder and took him in. His bangs were even darker than usual, slicked to his face with sweat. Muscled chest and abs pulsed with deep pants. Beneath it all, he was stroking a lengthened erection that made you lick your lips. Even with raw and colored cheeks, the flirtatious resilience written all over your face shined through, “And you?”

Levi cocked a brow, letting just one corner of his lip twitch up ever so slightly, “You’re not half-bad, brat.”

In his incessantly cool voice, you heard his calm wavering. His trying to hold composure in such an intimate setting - faced with such overwhelming pleasure, it was insanely adorable and immensely sexy. 

Given his downplay with words, _not half-bad_ was truly a hell of a compliment. Given his control, such feverish masturbation was a slew of vulnerability. These things, you knew. Some surge of confidence, despite your submissive position, you used his words to your advantage, “Not half-bad, huh?” You arched your back and straightened your hips, putting your curves on even fuller display. “How’s this, _Captain?_ ”

_Fuck,_ if he did not love that title. _Fuck,_ if he was not helpless to your call. _Fuck,_ if he did not love this complete exposure. Levi curled his lip under his teeth and bit. _“Mmm... Yeah.”_ Notable breathlessness and satisfaction in his voice, “Much better.” 

Levi took his hand off his cock and brought it to your nape instead. Of course getting himself off felt amazing, but he would much rather make you feel better, watch you get wetter, and do what you had done for him.

With this grip around your neck, his hot hand sent chills down your spine, ones he could see. Watching your body shake from the pleasure and pain he provided, he was sure there was no better sight in the world. Levi pushed your head to the pillow, face to the side. A hand at your backside gave spanks, squeezes, rubs. A hand at your neck massaged, kneaded, tickled. 

A glimmer of sweat encased your body. His handprint lingered clearly on your skin. Your vocals flawless to his perfect touch. He had absolutely fallen in love with this spanking session. How willingly you stayed, you had too. 

Levi pressed his tip to your lips, “You know, if you keep this up, we may be up all night.”

_That wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world._


	27. The Night Before (NSFW)

**WC: 1400 words  
** **Tags: NSFW, fem!reader**

The night before your first expedition. All other recruits were fast-asleep or otherwise trying to get there, fighting off their anxiety in hopes of some rest before the big day. You, on the other hand, treated it like any other night. Even though this routine was regular, each evening was by no means ordinary. 

A cup of tea in both hands, you resorted to knocking with your combat boots. When he heard that steel-toed thump, he never bothered to say “come in”, for he already knew who it was and that he wanted you inside.

Despite the standing appointment, your heart always skipped at his swift response. Before you could finish knocking - kicking - his door, he would have it open for you in a matter of seconds. His promptness made your mind wander. _Just how long has he been waiting for me?_

“Hey.”

You gestured forth his tea, “Black. Unsweetened. Not an ounce of cream.”

Levi took the cup in his trademark hold. With his head tilted down, he allowed himself a smirk, “Thanks.”

At his door, you took off your boots and placed them perfectly parallel on his mat. You knew how rare an invitation you had, to be let into Captain Levi’s quarters, you were not going to disrespect the clean freak’s space. You shouldered off your jacket as well and hung it on the back of his door. 

As he turned the lock, you sauntered to his sofa. The first time you came over, you walked on eggshells. Now, though, you could sprawl out without hesitation. Not through any confessions nor any outward acts, your feelings towards each other had been more or less conveyed. At last, you had found someone you could truly unwind with. That wait had been long for both of you.

Levi took a polite seat at your side, not too close, not too far. Once again satisfied with your perfect brew, he tousled your hair, “You’re getting better.”

You bit your lip. With his undermined way of speaking, you knew it was truly a hell of a compliment. Between sips, “I didn’t see you at Erwin’s speech. Were you there?” 

“Was there.” Levi turned his neck to the side, making thoughtful eye contact. “You stood out in that crowd.”

Tone playful, “I’m sure my confidence was radiating.”

His expression read, _Are you kidding?_ “Everyone else looked on the brink of shitting themselves.” 

You snickered against the rim, causing some steam to rise up and turn your cheeks hot. Levi stayed solemn and cupped both hands around the burning cup, “... not that I blame them.”

His shift caused your chuckling to halt. This severity he imposed was a stark contrast from the usual lighthearted feel of your time together. The more you thought about it, though, you realized he was absolutely right. So many lives would be lost tomorrow. Some soldiers had already had their last meal, their last sleep, their last tea time without even knowing it. You glanced up from your tea to find Levi staring vehemently at you. 

Lips parted as you read into his expression. Most would write it off as merely a flat stare, but you knew better - knew him better - than that. Angled brows conveyed his concern. Sharp jaw exuded intensity. If not for that, his eyes said it all. Your attention landed on his lips which seemed hot and sparkling with lingering tea.

Absentmindedly, you set your cups aside, smoothly and uniformly leaning into each other further and further and further until lips met in a perfect match. The first brush was brief, the gap that followed was not. You both panted into each other’s mouths, wondering what exactly you were getting yourselves into, how exactly you should act in this setting. Humanity’s strongest, though, was quick to size up a situation. Levi reached a careful hand to your neck, returning you to the kiss, a return you desperately needed.

A few fingertips at the side of your neck developed to a fully-pressed palm at your nape. His other hand caressed your shoulder before working inward to your buttons. He undid them carefully, their necessity for tomorrow’s venture all too pressing in his mind. When he laid eyes on your exposed chest, though, it seemed all thoughts had vanished - expedition included. Naturally, he trailed his tongue down your jawline, down your neck, clavicle, breast, and finally sucked your nipple. When you looked down and found Levi so enthralled with your body, the idea of his infatuation was enough to make your panties dampen.

A shaky hand curled at the start of his undercut and found hold in his locks, bringing and holding him closer to your front. One hand scissored and tweaked your nipple while the other worked on freeing your lower half. Combined with his slick and textured tongue, your mind was spinning in the moment. You wanted to give him that same rush. You reached between his legs, easily finding the hardening in his canvas pants, and swiftly began massaging.

Levi breathed against your perk, “That’s all?” 

You offered a breathless laugh, _There’s that teasing I know and love._ To both your delights, you summoned the courage to unbuckle his belt, unzip his pants, put that fabric aside, and hold him entirely in your hand - skin on tender skin. 

Levi pushed himself forward, pressing your back to the leather of his sofa. For a moment, you stayed like that: he hovered above you, you submit to him. Levi paused, parsing over how ready you both were. When two devious hands reached to his shirt and let his buttons loose, he curled his lip under his teeth. He wanted you. You wanted him. What was so hard about that? 

Levi brought two fingers to your moistened middle. As he was about to thrust in, you interrupted, “No, Levi…” He froze until you begged. “Please, I’m - I’m ready now.”

At last, you caught the tinge of a smirk. He took his member from your stroking hands and pressed the tip to your lips, “Well, me too.”

_What were we waiting for?_

Both ready, more than ready, he sheathed his length into you slowly. When your walls stretched, you bit your hand with a small whimper. 

“Hey, you okay?” Levi slowed his pace, “Do you need me to stop?”

“No, it -” You took a sharp inhale, “it feels... _amazing._ ”

_That’s good to hear._ He surged with positive reinforcement and you could feel it. With each thrust came further evidence of your pleasures. Of course, he would chase more and more. Though his pace was fast, he was not one to rush things. He wanted this for so long, he was going to take you in as much as he could. One hand sturdied himself at your breast while the other made perfect circles around your clit. He was too good to be true. You writhed against the sheets, clutched his pillow, and threw your hand in your hair. When he watched your reactions, he began to question just which one of you was feeling better. Perhaps it was equal. No matter, he was going to work his damnedest to make you feel good - like it was his last mission on earth.

_“Oh, L’Levi… “_ You arched your back, the sensation he brought you innately overwhelming, _”Levi…!”_

Hands danced all over his body. Nails dug into his skin with each and every crashing wave. As he watched you - felt you - cum around him, it was all he needed to reach a climax of his own. Levi made a strong grip on each side of your hips, bringing you further down his body, allowing his cum to reach back all the same. 

When your eyes fluttered open, you saw a sight you - no one - had ever seen before. Levi was trembling. This was new for you as it was to him. There was no telling what the day ahead held. Maybe he was wrong to get so attached. Or maybe it was right to make the most of your time together.

You lifted your hand to his cheek. Eyes flickered in an anxious awaiting of his answer, “Any regrets?”

A soft smile. Levi kissed the inside of your hand before nuzzling into it. He steadied your gaze, “Not one.”


	28. Behind Closed Doors (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of the other Scouts has taken an interest. Levi wants to make sure they know you're taken.

**WC: 1200 words  
Tags: NSFW, possessive sex, slight voyeurism, brief mentions of blood, fem!reader**

“Levi? Wh - What are we doing? Where are we going?”

His only response was a tighter hold of your hand and a pick up in his pace. He did not even offer a look back. His lack of verbal response, you thought he might be ignoring you. Really, it was all in his head. Your questions were drowned out by the lingering “You’re so strong,” and “You’re not half bad yourself,” quotes running through repetitions in his mind. Hand-to-hand combat practice between you and another Scout just a few minutes ago, it had gotten too handsy for Levi’s taste or tolerance.

Levi walked with large, deliberate strides, ones you had to jog to keep up with. When he shoved in the key to his office and slammed the door behind you both, he was just as out of breath as you were. He kept a solid hold on your hand that contrasted with the edge in his voice, “What the fuck was that?”

Your arm felt like jelly in his grasp. “What are you talking about?”

_“Tch…”_ Levi spoke through grit teeth, “Back there.” He flicked towards the direction of the training grounds, where he had just dragged you from.

Pupils flickered as you tried and failed to understand. Mouth wavered in a stammer. Watching your genuine confusion, he realized that words would do no good at this point. He was going to make you, him, everyone understand in an even better way. 

Levi thrust his hands hard against the door, one at each side of your head. Your innocence was both immensely frustrating and incredibly adorable. Maybe you did not know what was so wrong, no matter, he was going to make sure it would not happen again. Past the furrow in his brow, the rage in his eyes, you caught a glimmer of infatuation in his expression. He let you think for just a moment before pressing his lips strong and fast against yours. Lips parted in a shocked gasp, at which he seized the opportunity to push his tongue past. His kiss was feverish, purposed, overwhelming, and you wanted more.

Shaky hand reached up and caressed his wrist, encouraging his stay. Instead, he twisted out from your clutch, grabbed your wrists instead, and pinned them above your head. He was in control. You were all his. He would let everyone know. 

The kiss lasted so long, was so unexpectedly feverish, you were left absolutely breathless. Your pants were music to his ears and his alone, but that was not enough for him. Levi departed from your lips with a swipe of his tongue, one that traced your jawline and trailed your neck. It was far from your first time, but you had no idea just how in control he could be. With your hands still forcefully pinned and utterly useless, with his tongue and teeth tickling and biting, all prior encounters seemed vanilla sweet. 

Right hand bound your wrists. Left hand squeezed your neck. Each time you opened your mouth to cry out, it was the exact moment he turned the bite to a suck and the squeeze to a caress. It was as if he could sense your limits and knew how to dance with them. Before he had seemed so irate, but now, he was giving you the thrill of a lifetime. The vein in his neck and knit of his brows, maybe his anger had not left at all. You had no idea that such sex was possible, but when you looked down to the length in his pants, this new discovery had your head spinning. 

Your vulnerability to him was completely visible, but he needed more than that. No matter how tenderly he squeezed, how hard he bit, how much blood he drew and licked, none of it seemed to get it out of you. An uncharacteristic smirk and low growl sent chills down your spine, but that was not satisfactory either.

Maintaining his grip on you, keeping his mouth to your neck, he hastily undressed you both with his free hand. Your heaving breasts with perked nipples, his erect member leaking with precum, both jaws dropped at the sight of the other. Small whimpers escaped from the catch in your throat. Deep grunts broke from the depths of his abdomen. 

It was not the first time you had fucked in his office. You looped your thighs around his hips in habit. He would carry you to his bed, or maybe even his desk, as he had plenty of times before. Though he was carrying you now, you were not going anywhere. Instead of making for the flat surfaces, he kept you pressed against this vertical one. His reckless thrust in was surprising, startling, stunning.

You threw your head back against the wooden, rickety door. “H-Hey…! Someone - _hah’ahh!_ ” Though you were struggling to speak, he never let up. In fact, he amplified and accelerated, “someone will hear… _us….!_ ”

Levi brought his mouth beside your ear. Harsh exhales titillated your cusp. Soundwaves translated throughout your body in uncontainable convulsions. _“I know.”_

You raised your brows, at last picking up a hint of what this was all about. You looked into his eyes, where it all seemed to make sense. Emotions of power, lust, jealousy were practically spelled out for you. You thought it impossible that he would ever feel insecure, but if Levi needed reassurance, you were sure as hell going to provide. It was the least you could do for humanity’s strongest, humanity’s sexiest.

With each thrust came more sighs, clenches, twitches. With each sign of your arousal came more of his own. You felt his grip on your wrists loosen just a bit in his susceptibility. Though involuntary, you took it as a signal. You slipped your hands out from his hold and dug your nails strong and hard into his back. When you drew blood, he grit his teeth and groaned. Pleasure and pain were truly hand in hand. 

On your end, it was the relentless fucking he gave. He always stretched you out. But pinned to the wall, the sensation was truly all over. Back and head knocking against the door, skin burning in friction, the ache from the spread in your hips. It was all so agonizing yet all so amazing. 

Breasts bouncing. Chest rising. Gaze dwindling. In his hyperfocus, he picked up all your changes. Through parted lips, he watched your tongue flick against the back of your teeth. All his efforts were about to be rewarded. Pupils dilated, cock surged, snarl twitched, all in immense anticipation.

_“L’L…”_ Your core tightened around him. Your sex had taken over at this point. The other side of the door was behind you both literally and figuratively.

That brink-of-orgasm breathlessness, he spoke past it, demanding, “Come on. Say it. _Scream it.”_

_Fuck._ His command, you would never disobey your captain, you would never dream of it. Nails oscillated up and down his back, from the definition in his shoulders to the angle of his hips, coating themselves in even more of his red. “Levi... ! _Levi!”_

_That’s it._

With your cry of his name, that everyone could hear, he could at last relax and release along with you: you were all his, no one would ever forget that. 

He could always give a reminder.


	29. Losing a pet

**WC: 1600 words  
Tags: fem!reader, hurt-comfort, grief, pet loss**

No matter how many times you had gone through it, it never got easier. Even in the Scouts, where death was a weekly - if not daily - occurrence, it tore you up each time. Old and young, comrades and friends, humans and animals.

You could not pinpoint why, but along with grief came outstanding guilt. Maybe I could have saved them. I should have done more. _Why didn’t I? Why did I? Why…?_

The weight was overwhelming - far too much for one person to bear. However, you still chose to go it alone. Your consideration was one of your best traits. It was what made you the most friends and what first caught his attention. However, it could sometimes take a heavy toll on you. As much as you wanted a hand, you did not want to put a damper on anyone. You desperately wanted - needed - someone to talk to you, someone to hug you, someone to help you, but you just could not get yourself to seek it.

So, you made for your room. Unlike the commons or the cafeteria, there would be no one to meet you there.

// // //

Your absence from dinner was immediately noticed. It was not the first meal you had missed, nor was it the first day you had isolated yourself. Levi certainly understood the merit in alone time, but he also understood that too much of it was good for no one. Levi set his tray back on the stack. Regular mess hall grub would not do tonight.

Instead, he dressed to go out. Your favorite restaurant, tea shop, bakery, flower store... when it came to you, nowhere was too far for him.

// // //

He was never one to put himself on a pedestal, but he knew himself most fit to help you through this. Not only was he your life partner, your significant other, but he had gone through more loss than almost anyone on Earth. Family, friends, he had lost them all. It was not only that he had gone through grief, but he knew the tools for getting out from under it.

That one fateful day, his very first expedition, he witnessed the death of his two closest, two only, friends. Somehow, after such heavy losses, he was able to keep his head up. Not only did he just get by, he was able to grow into humanity’s strongest soldier after such a grief-stricken past. Levi was the perfect one for you in every way - the perfect one for you to go through this with.

It seemed lost on you, though. In the shadowy lens of grief, you felt the exact opposite. Someone who had gone through so much worse, you felt you had no right to ask for his help. You told yourself: your losses were nothing compared to his. But in fact, they were something, and he knew it.

You could not get yourself to ask for his help, but thankfully, you did not have to. Three soft knocks startled you, but his steady voice immediately followed, “Hey, it’s me.”

You sniffled, trying to disguise the sadness in your voice. You did not want him to worry, but your response was still weak, “Hey.”

He asked your permission, “Can I come in?”

“Sure.” All other circumstances, you would have rushed to the door. Now, though, you felt too weak to stand, too weak to walk. You stayed on your bed, sure that he would manage.

There was a bit of audible fumbling before he managed to open up. When he came in, you used your forearm to wipe away some tears as you could not believe your eyes. Covering his head was a large bouquet of lilies. Tucked under his shoulder, a container of warm soup and bread. Balancing on his forearm was a cookie tin. Finally, in his hand, a teacup filled to the brim - on the cusp of spilling over.

Despite this balancing act, you felt glued to the bed. No matter, it worked out just fine, he was always and ever capable. Levi set the meal on your desk, the sweets on your dresser, the flowers on your nightstand, and the tea in your lap.

He came to your bed and took a seat at your side. The bed shook slightly when he landed, but he sturdied you by wrapping his arm around your back. “Still feeling down?”

A lump was still largely in your throat. With him here, you refrained from opening up. After all, you did not feel that you had the right to.

At your silence, Levi nodded, understanding completely. “Well, it’s alright. You should take all the time you need.”

It was nothing he said, but you began to think about how long you had been down and out. Even as your life came to a screeching halt, the rest of the world did not. “I guess - ” You sniffed, “I guess I should be used to it by now, right?”

Levi stayed silent, rubbing your back as you continued, “Why am I so weak? Why does it destroy me every time?” As much as you wanted to hold back, you could not anymore. You threw your face into your hands and wept. No sounds, only shaking.

You thought over your responsibilities, how your depression must have been causing others to pick up your slack. When life hit you with another terrible loss, you painted the world altogether too cruel. Little did you know, people were far from that. When your peers heard about the passing of your pet, not only did they have complete understanding and sympathy, they had offered to pick up on your duties for however long you needed to recover. Everyone you knew had gone through something similar. Everyone knew how awful loss could be, likewise, how amazing a helping hand could be. It was too easy to forget that when you felt so lonely.

Levi scratched his nails lightly along your back. It was not at all painful, rather, grounding and soothing. “Hey, it’s alright.” He guided you into a hug, petting the back of your hair and whispering in your ear, “You’re okay. You’re okay. I’m here. I’ve got you.”

You buried your face in his shoulder. His tan jacket of the uniform darkened as your tears fell on it.

It did not make sense to you, that your typical strategy - _adapt and overcome_ \- could work in all other aspects except this one. It was frustrating, confusing, agonizing. Your voice was strained as you whined, “How do I stop letting it bother me, Levi?”

He took a deep breath against your chest and spoke soundly, “You can’t.” 

His abrupt words made you pull from his chest. Steel grey eyes met yours full of tears. He repeated, “You can’t. It’s not possible.”

You bit down on your trembling lip, wordlessly beckoning for an explanation. Levi thumbed the tears from your cheeks, “It will always be sad, but that’s how it should be. If our loved ones’ deaths did not bother us, what would that say about ourselves?”

Truthfully, he was right. Becoming numb, while it may have sounded nice, it was an oxymoron. As long as they had an impact on your life, their loss would impact you likewise.

Levi sensed your reasoning and offered further solace, “But it’s not the end, either. They live on with us forever,” Levi placed a hand on your heart, “in here.”

His flat tone and simple way of speaking could be hard to take for some, but underneath it all, you knew he meant the world. 

After a series of sniffs and thoughts, and an uncertain amount of time, only a few words seemed right. You held his hand to your cheek and managed a weak smile, “Thank you, Levi.”

// // //

That post-crying stuffiness, while it was adorable, he had to help your suffering in every way he could, even if it meant getting something dirty. Levi reached into his chest pocket, swiftly pulling out a pristine white handkerchief and bringing it to your nose, “Here. Blow.”

You felt a bit guilty staining his tissue like that, but with your congestion, it was getting a little too hard to breathe. Even with a stuffy nose, his familiar scent was recognizable and calmed you a bit. After a handful of nose blows, you peeked your eyes up to his, “Dakes.”

He chuckled slightly at your cute and pathetic mispronounciation. Once he knew you could take it, he threw an endearing tease, _”Tch…”_ Levi pinched his fingers and wiggled, cleaning you up, “Disgusting, brat.” He immediately contradicted himself when he placed a loving kiss on your forehead.

For a long time, as long as you needed, he continued to calm you. You laughed over silly memories with that little thing, cried over how much you would miss them. You always gave everything all your love and all your attention, your pets were no exception. With every ounce of your being, you strove for their happiness. At last, you were able to take comfort in the fact that, together, you lived - and gave each other - the best lives that you could have. _No regrets._

At last, with your senses coming to, you could finally savor the meal, the tea, the sweets, the flowers he had bought. None of it had you asked for, but maybe you did not have to. As long as he was by your side, you would always be read, your needs would always be met.

The heavy weight of grief may never go away, but you would always have someone to bear the load with you.


	30. The One That Got Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That feeling you found in each other has been lost since then. In a desperate attempt and uncharacteristic risk, you both try to chase it.

**WC: 1500 words  
Tags: sfw, angst, fem!reader, class reunion AU**

It had been a long while since high school. It was not that life was dull since then. His job, duties, responsibilities all demanded the most of him, but none of them had made him feel the way you had. He promised himself that one day, that release from his obligations would be oh so sweet. That tea shop, a nice home, and a warm bed were all in his future, but he could not envision achieving any of those without you. 

Timing, luck, risk were all factors of his work, but it was hard to accept that they would apply to his love. He was far from naive, but he would be lying if he said he never hoped your paths would cross. It was a thought perpetually in the back of his mind, sometimes at the forefront: he was not sure how or when, but you two had to meet again. Someway. Somehow. 

If he thought it over too much, he would have annoyed himself. Rolling his eyes, shaking his neck, smacking his forehead, he never imagined attending a frivolous event like this. However, he would never forgive himself if he let this slip by. It had been years since he last saw you, who knew when the next meeting might be?

Levi looked in the mirror and scoffed. What the fuck was he doing? He had never tried to dress up for anyone. Well, at least, not since your prom. Even then, you did the hard parts for him. You picked out the tux, the tie, the flowers. When he saw his reflection now, he noticed a clear difference compared to that day. His jacket looked strangely plain, for back then, you had donned it with a boutonnière. In his closet, he was all alone, but he swore he felt your hands on his chest again, fiddling, tickling, and at last patting when you managed to pin it on. The memory of your hands on him made his heart race, and he could only imagine what feeling your touch again would do.

He did not think you would be there, but he had to take a chance.

// // //

It had been a long term relationship. Things were safe, steady, still. Your mother always emphasized stability, _If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it._ Your relationship with Mr. 9 to 5 was just that, and you were sure that once you phoned her, telling her that you walked away, you would get an earful.

If you thought it over too much - at all actually - the risk you took would be agonizing. However, you did not regret it, at least, not yet. You left just a week before your high school reunion, and that timing was deliberate. For also like your mother said, _You’re not getting any younger._

The relationships you had since then, none of them were able to make you feel the way he did. He gave you a feeling you had desired and chased ever since your untimely split, but no matter where you searched - romance, career, hobbies - you had never been able to find it again. 

You looked in the mirror and felt a little giddy. The last time you dressed like this - flowing gown, red lip, jeweled barrette - must have been at senior prom. When you saw your reflection, you remembered how Levi gawked when he laid eyes on you those years ago. His pupils had dilated, he sifted in his stance, and you swore you caught the lightest pink spread across his cheeks. The memory alone could make your heart flutter, you could only imagine what reuniting would do.

You did not think he would be there, but you had to take a chance. 

// // //

You left your house with confidence. After all, you looked absolutely radiant, beautiful, and you had done yourself up to the nines. However, when you walked through the heavy doors of the school, that confidence disintegrated fast. 

The cafeteria was done up for the event, but not dissimilar enough. Immediately, it seemed all eyes were on you. As you made uncomfortable eye contact with the sea of your former peers, you suddenly questioned everything that had brought you to this setting. In an instant, you were flung back into high school and its awkwardness full force. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. There was one person and one person only you were here for. If this was what it took, well, it was too late to turn back now. _Oh, the things I would do for you._

There were hundreds of people, all of them familiar strangers. Dyed hair, long beards, tattoos, piercings, makeup… everyone had sure changed a lot. A fleeting wonder if Levi had, too. After a few moments of gawking, you tried to stay grounded, reminding yourself why exactly you were here. _Where would he be?_

That was the thing. _Well, he wouldn’t be here._ You were already lost. It was impossible to imagine him at the punch bowl, in the main hall, at the coat racks, if you could not imagine him here at all. You sighed and knit sweaty hands together. 

One lap.

Two laps.

Three.

After a handful of walkarounds, you already felt defeated. You held your head in your hands and felt tears start to well. _Of course he wouldn’t come._ You had both hated high school so much. In fact, that mutual distaste was the beginning spark of your relationship, leading to countless conversations on that roof, where you both physically and emotionally stood yourselves above the rest. In each other, you could find company in your particular likes, dislikes, traits, similarities. Thinking he would be here, not only did you feel stupid, but you felt inadequate. If you overlooked such a glaring truth about him, how wrong had you been about your relationship as a whole?

 _This is all so stupid,_ you chuckled to yourself. Ironically, as you smiled, the twitch of your lips pushed your cheeks upward, forcing some tears to spill over the brim. Laughing and crying, crazy hormones and emotional rollercoasters, yet another throwback to your high school memories.

It was strangely surreal. Not only walking down these halls for the first time since you were a teenager, but the entire scene. Warm tears streaked down your face. Floor-length gown brushed against your pacing legs. You walked with no destination in mind. After all, where do you go from here? Safety net gone. Last hope destroyed. You could use some perspective, a breath of fresh air, one last trip down memory lane.

// // //

His hands were folded together, forearms flat against the concrete balcony. Up here, the night air was cold and wind chill. Levi had a distaste for the cold, it reminded him too much of the damp underground. However, he could not bring himself to go back inside, at least, not yet.

Bangs wisped in the wind, occasionally interfering with his view. He did not mind, though. There was nothing to see, really. On this roof, he could see forever in any and all directions. Certainly, you were out there somewhere, but no matter how long he looked, he may not find you. In fact, it was completely unlikely. The chances were just too small.

But a small chance was greater than no chance.

“Levi?”

// // //

His grip instinctively tightened against the rail. Levi pivoted quickly, the whiplash and wind gave his appearance a cool current. Hair swayed. Fabric rippled. With the moon your only light, you swore he stepped right out of a screenplay, right out of your dreams, how you always imagined him.

The smile that worked across his lips, even on this cool night, made you feel warm all over. You twirled a strand in your hair and sauntered closer, “I didn’t think I’d find you here.”

Levi shrugged his shoulders lightly, “Where else would I be?” You picked up a glaring sarcasm in his voice, one no one else had ever been able to notice in him. There was only one who could ever understand him, and against all odds, she had walked right back into his life. 

But enough of these formalities. Frankly, you were both sick of them, could do well without them, you did not need them. With a childlike excitement, you took a running start and leapt into his arms. Like you were nothing, he picked you up and swung you around. Like you were everything, he held you close and tight. 

At last, that long lost feeling had been returned to you both, found only in the arms of each other. 

_I’m not losing you again._


	31. Cat Shelter

**WC: 2900 words  
Tags: sfw, fluff, volunteering.**

His passion for animals was deep-rooted. Cats, in particular, were the species that meant the most. Their personalities resonated with him. Like them, he was also quiet, chill, and just a tad bit rude. Once one got to know them, though, they really opened up and displayed their true selves - impossible not to love. Past a brisk exterior was an internal softie for both him and felines.

However, it was not only their similarities that brought Levi to the cat shelter. By far and away, cats were the most common strays in the underground. One could not walk a block without catching the glimpse of a handful of cats scurrying away. There were plenty of people to feel sorry for down there, but Levi could not help but care for those strays too. In his time as a thug, after he and his gang were fed, the neighborhood strays came next.

While others said that “hate” was a strong word, for Levi, “love” was a strong word. He would never say it out loud, it was hard enough to admit to himself, but he did love cats. Through all the chaos he had gone through in his life, that feeling never wavered, not even in the form of one late shift.

But of course, there were times he came close to breaking that streak. Chronic insomnia resulted in the occasional, unpredictable, hard sleep that sometimes made him miss his alarm. Today just happened to be one of those times. He only brushed his teeth, flung on clothes, and swiped his deodorant - but even then - he still might not make it in time.

The moment he unlocked the shelter doors, his watch read 9:00 AM exactly. An exasperated sigh of relief, a relief that was short-lived.

It hit him like a slap in the face. “Oh, _shit…_ ” With his thumb and pointer finger, Levi immediately pinched his nose shut. The tickle in his sinuses was so terrible, so distinct, he knew it could only be one thing: he had forgotten his allergy meds.

It was only his luck that the ones he wanted to help, the ones who so desperately needed his help, were also the only things on Earth he was allergic to. Levi took a deep huff and groaned. It was not the cats’ fault. It was his: his own stupidly broken immune system and his own hasty negligence from this morning were the ones to blame.

He lived too far away to turn back, but maybe he could dart to the pharmacy as long as he let his coworkers know. Levi braced himself to go deeper into the shelter, keeping his nose tucked under his shirt collar all the way. Already, though, his eyes were starting to water and there was no remedy on hand for that.

Levi turned the handle of the breakroom, at least, he tried to. At five past nine, it was still locked. Levi reached into his pocket and pulled out the key. Once unlocked, he opened up with haste. The lights were off, the room empty, all names except his crossed out for today’s shift. _“Tch… “_ Levi sighed. _Of fucking course._

It took him a few moments of staring at the marked-up schedule for him to accept that this was his situation. One human, dozens of cats, and all of them needed help.

_Better get to work._

// // //

Just like it had been so long since he last forgot his medicine, he had forgotten how hard allergies could hit him. To his dismay, the further back he went, the worse it got.

Outside the main room, he could already hear the cats meowing and could already feel his throat itching. Managing his allergies and working an efficient shift, as he moved in slow-motion, it was painfully obvious that he could not have both.

The cats habitually swarmed him, which he always found endearing, never bothersome, except for today. “H - _Hey…_ ” Levi tried to turn away, being careful not to step on any paws, but it was already too late. There was no escape from the cats or the sneezes they induced.

The first two were so rapid, he did not have the chance to cover. Levi groaned, “Fucking disgust- _hh’tchu!_ ” The sleeve of his elbow was able to catch the next one, the next one, the next one, the tenth one.

 _“Nguhh…”_ Levi exhaled shakily, _This is pathetic._ Against the back of his wrist, he went through a series of sniffles, trying to manage his runny nose and that annoying tickle. Besides his symptoms, there were countless cats that needed his attention, but already, he was a hot mess.

Levi was always so diligent, this was the first time they had ever seen him without his meds. Each time he coughed, sneezed, cleared his throat, had any kind of allergic reaction, all eyes were literally on him. The poor cats were so startled, but there was not much solace he could offer them besides more pats, more care, and a meager, “Sorry…”

He could only hope they would understand, or at least, get used to his symptoms. How likely was that, though? That the cats could adapt to his allergies but not himself? He shrugged his shoulders, _Maybe._ Cats always seemed to have that sixth sense.

A chime rang and echoed throughout the empty building, snapping him out of wandering thoughts, signaling that someone must have come in.

Levi huffed with frustration and congestion. _What is it now?_

// // //

It was really the cat who found you. On a brisk morning walk, a warm fur startled you: brushing up on your skin and nuzzling into your ankle. With its poor kitten eyes, you did not have it in you to just walk away. You knelt down, surprised that the cat did not flinch, looking for a collar, tags, anything, but there were no signs of ownership. You scanned the area, but there was no one out and about this early in the day.

You tried to walk away, but the tabby followed you, which gave you an idea. Maybe on a weekday, you would not have been doing this. However, it was a free and easy Saturday with nothing better to do. With a new friend at your side, you both walked to the animal shelter.

From the outside, it looked nearly abandoned. Most of the lights were off. There were no signs of any human presence. You almost turned around, but the schedule on the doors suggested they were open now. It took until you turned the handle to believe that it was not closed and locked up.

You clicked your tongue and held out your hands, the tabby naturally walked himself right into your arms, earning an enamored smile from you.

With a careful pace, you let yourself in. As you pulled the door open, that familiar smell of feline hit you hard, making you realize how much help they probably needed. If not for that, the absence of any staff, even at the front desk, made it obvious. You were kind enough to wait a few seconds, then a few minutes, until your arms started to hurt. For an alley cat, he sure was chonky. Ringing the front desk bell felt rude, so you gave only a slight tap.

For a few moments, there was silence. You were just about to give up when you heard a shuffle from down the hall. It was not even noon yet, but the worker that came in looked like he had already been through a hell of a day.

You spoke kindly, seeming as though he was going through it, “Hi, good morning.”

 _Morning?_ Levi kept his flat expression but was internally in disbelief. After all the agony he had suffered so far, _It’s still only morning?_

It had been a while since he last worked the front desk and it showed. “What can I do for you?” He was not exactly the best at customer service. At the last second, he added on, “Miss?”

The title caught you off-guard. Neither of you were ones for such formalities. Just as awkwardly, you stumbled, “Sir, I - umm… I -”

 _Spit it out, brat,_ was what he wanted to say. Truly, he did not have time for this. There were countless cats in back all meowing his name, but his reception training from all those years ago would not be neglected. With a tilt of his head and a tired expression, he instead offered a compromise, “Levi. Please.”

You swallowed, “Levi. Right.” You took a deep breath. Had you just run into the grumpy shelter worker? “I found this stray.” You propped the heavy cat up on the counter.

“ _Ugh…_ ” Levi groaned and rubbed his face, “They just never stop coming.”

Frustration tainted his voice. For a moment, you had an internal panic. You felt as though you had done something wrong, perhaps it was a mistake to bring him here. But Levi was not talking about the cats - at least - not only the cats.

Hand clutched the opposite shoulder and he politely turned away, sneezing quietly into the crook of his elbow. His sneezes seemed neverending, so irritated, but all so unexpectedly cute. After the fit, he shook his head like a dog, his bangs swaying back and forth across his face. Oddly adorable.

“Bless you.”

He redirected his gaze back to you and sniffed, “Thanks.”

Your gazes met for just a moment and you picked up some tiny signs. Lids drooped over watery eyes. The edges of his nostrils were a deepening red. A gradient was made with the pink across his cheeks. Your impression of him was confusing. His low voice, steel eyes, calm expression were all strangely contrasted by a pathetic display of symptoms.

Levi cleared his throat. “You were saying?”

You blinked twice, snapping out of your thoughts. “Right. I found this little guy…” You pet the tabby’s back absentmindedly, to Levi’s slight dismay, sending even more fur into the air - dirty fur at that.

He took a sharp inhale, _“ahh-”_ , but held it back. You did not seem to notice, continuing to scratch his ears. Levi moved the back of his wrist underneath his nose, attempting to quell the itch. It was rare that the finder came in person, he knew he ought to take the opportunity and have you answer all that you could, but there were a lot of questions to get through.

Levi took a big sniff in preparation. His goal was to get through the questionnaire without any… interruptions, so to speak. He gave two light coughs, trying to speak through the dryness, “First, any ID?”

“Uhh… yeah, sure.” You reached into your wallet.

Levi knit his brows, “… on the cat?”

“Oh, uh -” You were both red in the face now, “no.”

“Did you observe any aggressive behavior?”

“No.”

“Did they hiss at you?”

“No.”

“Paw at you?”

“No.”

“Scratch, bite, charge?”

“No. No. No.”

“Do they seem…” Levi’s voice started to trail. The gaze in his eyes grew far off. “Do they - _hih_ \- do they… see - _ihh…!_ ” _Fuck, seriously? Now?_ He fought it off for as long as he could, before inevitably ducking into his shoulder and sneezing again.

Levi reached for a tissue, blew slightly, and sniffled before promptly carrying on. “Do they seem sick?”

He was too cute for his own good and you could not help but giggle, “He doesn’t, but you do.”

Levi shook his head, “No I’m just a - _ahh_ -” he sneezed again into the tissue, “I’m just allergic.”

“You…?” You nearly laughed, “You’re allergic to cats?”

“Shut it.” Maybe it was the weakness in his voice, maybe you were well-attuned to tone, but despite the words, you knew he was not mad.

“And where did you find it?”

“Just outside my apartment.”

“… Which would be where?”

You stammered a bit. Something about giving this guy your address, even if just for documentation but especially at first encounter, made your heart flutter. You were happy to offer all your information, but shorted, “Right downtown. Off Main.”

A few more hasty scribbles and he closed the binder. “That’s that then.” Sex, age, breed, those could all be figured out on his own.

Levi allowed himself to cough, a slight reward for getting through that endurance round. One last question, “Anything else?” Once again, his customer service training nagged, “- that I can do for you today… miss?” You had only just met him, but could already tell that such pleasantries were clearly forced and quite unnatural for him.

He expected the typical, “Nope. Thanks. That’ll be all,” but you pleasantly surprised him instead. “You’re accepting volunteers?”

Levi muttered the shelter’s cheesy slogan, “We’ll take anyone - by the hand or the paw.”

You darted your eyes back and forth, trying and failing to understand, “…Huh?”

Levi’s face flushed, this time not due to any allergies. He spoke fast to disguise his embarrassment, “We’ll take anyone.”

You smiled, “I’d definitely be interested!”

The look in his eyes read, _Really?_ They were so short of volunteers, no matter how overwhelmed and under the weather he was, he had to make time for recruitment. 

You pitched yourself, “I love cats. I’m not really that experienced with them, but I’ve always wanted to learn… just never had the time.”

“Ahh?” His intonation rose, “You free now?” If you caught on quick enough, he daydreamed, maybe he could run to the pharmacy today after all.

He was so commanding, so captivating. Even if you were busy, you could not fathom telling him no. “Uhhh… sure?” He raised one eyebrow, you did not sound sure enough. You hurried, “Yeah, sure! Now’s fine, but uhhh…” On the countertop, a laminated sheet of the lengthy application process was glaring. “Is there any protocol I have to do first or something?”

His smirk took your breath away. “Boss is out today.” Who was he kidding? He practically ran the place anyways. Levi scooped up the stray, came out from behind the desk, and started towards the back. “If you won’t tell, I won’t tell.”

You zipped your lips and tossed the invisible key, which did not quite make sense. Levi gave a single-breath chuckle and flicked his head in gesture, “This way.”

// // //

As much as he wanted to put on his best performance - giving sound instructions and a good impression for you - his allergies had him in a haze. Sometimes, he explained things twice. Sometimes, he did not explain things at all. You were kind on him, though, never once correcting him on it.

No matter how hard he tried to paint a pretty picture, it was abundantly clear - even to a newbie - that there were a lot of problems. Not enough room. Not enough funding. Certainly, not enough people, but you would never complain about the circumstance nor the person you found yourself with now.

At times, he was serious. At others, sarcastic. In the clinic, he was diligent. In the playroom, blithe, joking that not being able to smell cat shit was one upside of congestion. 

At last, at the end of the hall, was a tiny little broom closet. These few square feet were the most well kept and organized of the entire place.

“Now this is the fun part.” Suspenseful enthusiasm in his voice combined with the way he rolled his sleeves up gave you a rush of chills. But when he grabbed a mob, a bucket, and filled it with hot soapy water, you instead felt warm all over.

“Hah- really?”

His expression was a mix of _What do you mean?_ and _Well, duh_ as he began cleaning the floors.

Then, you started to understand why someone like him was here. He really did enjoy doing this and he was really good at it, somehow managing today all by himself despite a slew of problems. Most importantly, though, were not his hobbies or his skills, but the passion he felt behind the work. It was easy for most to overlook this dire need, and that was exactly what drew him here. These poor things were not at fault for the world they were born in. Just as he had been helped out of his environment, he knew he could help them out too.

As you watched him sweep up the neverending mounds of shredded fur - crying, wheezing, sneezing throughout - it was when you realized just what kind of person he was - not coldhearted at all, in fact, far from it. Even without allergies, you could not think of anyone who would choose to spend an entire Saturday like this.

Well, you could think of one person…

“Hey… Levi?”

He turned to you and raised one brow in silent acknowledgment.

Your hands suddenly felt sweaty as you knit them together. “Will I see you tomorrow?”

Levi hooked one finger underneath his mask and tugged down, revealing a smile that made you weak in the knees.

“I sure hope so.”


	32. College and Covid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Priority Request. "I've been totally failing college since all the covid stuff, I tried to talk to someone about it but they told me to "get my life together". Could you do one where the reader is super overwhelmed, and Levi helps get everybody together to make them feel important? Maybe it started by someone telling reader something similar that was told to me? Tysm!"

**WC: 1500 words  
Tags: modern AU, college AU**

“So, did they have any good advice?”

Straight from the meeting with your advisor, you had hurried to his dorm. Your heart was racing, mind hurting, but you instinctively knew that in times like these, you needed him by your side. Somehow, despite the slew of emotions, your expression remained flat as you stuttered. “They umm… they umm…” It hurt you to even recall the encounter, let alone talk about it.

“Hey…” his voice was a blend of protectiveness and concern, “what’d they say?”

You thought that talking to an advisor would help, but what a mistake that had been. It had been many weeks of online school, but rather than easing into it, each week seemed to introduce new problems and make you fall further and further behind. You were proud of yourself, he was too, for being responsible and taking the initiative to ask for help, but after the disastrous encounter, you felt you were the stupidest person on Earth to have signed yourself up for that.

Your voice caught in your throat, barely a whisper, “They uh, they said I should uh…” Levi raised his brows until you managed, “that I need to ‘get my life together’.”

Levi looked towards the floor and shook his head. His entire body surged with a hot rage. _“Tch…”_ disgusted, “I’m sure that fixed everything.”

You laughed slightly - or tried to - but a few tears started to well.

Levi crossed his arms and tilted his head, “That’s seriously what they said?”

You clasped your hands together and nodded, biting your lip to hold back brewing whimpers.

“I’m sorry…” He continued, “I’m sorry you had to suffer that stupidity.” Levi rolled his eyes, genuinely astounded, “I’m sorry that the earth is home to an idiot like that.”

You gave a shaky and harsh exhale: a strange combination of a laugh and a sob. His sarcasm was clever, funny, endearing, but it could not help the tears from falling, at least, not tonight.

He instinctively switched his approach. “Really, honey… that sucks.” With careful steps, he came closer and embraced you in a hug. “I’m here for you, always.”

You buried yourself in his chest, a few tears dampening his clothes. Weakly, you muttered, “I know.”

He pet the back of your head. “Deep breaths. You’re okay…” Levi pulled you closer, reminding and assuring, “I’m here. I’m here.”

In your deep breath, your lips parted and the cries could no longer be contained. “I know…” Your shaky voice broke his heart but he knew he had to stay strong for you.

Levi sat you both down on the edge of the bunk, “Have you talked to anyone else about this? Your friends? Classmates? Anyone?” He rubbed your thigh, “How are they doing?”

You wiped your eyes, tears still spilling, “I’m not sure, I haven’t really talked to them.”

His curious gaze silently beckoned for an explanation. You shrugged, “I just don’t wanna bother them or be ‘needy.”

Levi knit his brows. Sometimes, you could be too considerate for your own good. It was kind to be aware of others, but it was not kind to yourself to hold your feelings in and suffer in solitary silence. It was not “needy” to ask friends for help, but he knew that just telling you would not do the trick. He would have to show you.

Already, he knew exactly what to do. He would need a day, maybe just a night, to carry it out. He began to think over his plan, but first, he would have to get you in bed and to sleep.

// // //

You called them “TLC nights” and you seemed to be having more and more of them lately. You and Levi would turn on some fairy lights, diffuse some essential oils, and chill out for the evening. Watching Netflix, listening to music, snuggling, talking, whatever had to be done to get you to relax, he would do without hesitation. If food would cheer you up, he would cook it or pay for it. If you did not feel up to eating, he would brew you some tea instead. Winding down could take minutes, hours, maybe even multiple days on end, but he always helped and never minded. 

Tonight, it took a few hours and lots of love until you managed to calm down. As soon as your heartbeat regulated and thoughts stopped racing, you instantly passed out on his dorm bunk. When he turned over his shoulder, prepared to hand you your tea, but instead finding that you had fallen asleep in minutes, he chuckled lightly. Each time you fell asleep in his dorm, in his bed, he felt a tinge of domestic bliss. He could not wait until one day, you would have your own place, free of college confines and concerns.

The instant he saw you sleeping, Levi began downing your tea. The caffeine was essential for the all-nighter he was about to pull.

// // //

When you woke up in the morning, Levi your big spoon, the glow of your laptop screen made your pupils shrink. You rubbed your eyes and took a few seconds to focus. It was a video player, the video itself timed from the beginning at 0:00.

As you stirred awake, it instantly awoke your insomniac boyfriend. Fresh out of sleep, your voice was groggy as you scratched his back and apologized, “I’m sorry. Did I wake you?”

Levi denied, “No. No.” _Yes._ “What are you watching?”

“Well, I haven’t started it yet.”

Levi kissed your forehead as he did every morning, “Well, maybe you should.”

You turned over your shoulder and gave a curious gaze. In response, Levi reached his arm over your body and pressed the spacebar, playing his film project, one he submitted at the very last minute.

Eren, with a hair length only quarantine and hormones could be responsible for, mentioned that he felt a bundle of emotions. While you hated to admit it, you could not help but laugh: _No surprise there._

Mikasa missed everyone, especially Eren. _Once again, no surprise_. Such a long time social distancing had forced her to ponder herself and her identity. Without friends, family, school, work, who was she?

Armin admitted that he was having trouble with school these days. That came as the first shock to you. Without libraries or cafes, it was hard for him to do homework. With all classes online, he was always just a quick search away from a deep dive into his curiosities. When he should have been studying laws of physics, he instead wound up at German vocabulary.

Sasha, Jean, Connie, for them, the changes in social life were the most difficult. Sasha missed restaurants. Jean missed going out for drinks. Connie missed parties, concerts, anything and everything. The three friends you considered happy-go-lucky were actually feeling quite lonely.

Levi had even reached out to his graduate school buds.

Erwin was frustrated with the administration’s incompetence. Really, he was often at a loss: how did this leadership ever run a university if they could not make a single sound COVID policy? They had doctoral degrees, no? How did they graduate, obtain this authority, with such poor decision-making?

Hange, the tech-savvy one, was getting lost in all the software she had to download and learn. Almost daily, they were revealing emails to classmates, professors, and audiences of research presentations. Not only did they have to learn their subjects, which were hard enough already, but a slew of new technology at the same time.

There were dozens more clips. Levi had truly reached out to everyone, and better yet, they all responded. All these friends and peers that you admired and respected, turns out, they were all going through it too. Everyone’s testimonies were different, some problems shared and some problems unique, but their main messages were identical: _We love you and we’re here for you!_

Levi looked to you with a knowing and loving gaze. He wrapped an arm around your stomach and tugged you into him, smiling, “You don’t have to take my word for it.”

His goal had been to stop your tears, but now, they were falling faster and freer than ever. The sad tears had been replaced by ones of happiness, he deemed it a half-win. Next time, he promised, he would do even better.


	33. Inexperienced (NSFW)

**Word Count: 1700**   
**Tags: NSFW, fem!dom!reader, sub!Levi**

While not exactly proud of it, he had touched himself multiple times before. Not any copious amount, but enough to know that this was something different.

It was not just his submissive state, not just the bondage, but your touch specifically. You took your role seriously: to be the best dom you could be, the dom your boy deserved, dedication took place both inside and outside the bedroom. The days of moisturizing your hands, the visits to the sex shop for outfits and ties, the dirty texts you sent at perfectly imperfect times, all of it built up to this moment. Your efforts paid off and showed tonight - clearly more than worth it.

On top of that, on top of him, tight latex both covered your curves while also leaving little - next to nothing - left to the imagination. Back of your calves met the back of your thighs, helping to keep your hips at a half-hover. Shoulders straight above his hipbones propped you above him. Perky tits hung over his leaking member, distanced so deliberately: his length could only reach them on those particular pulls, which of course - like everything else in your relationship - was only when you allowed. Levi was always under your control, tonight was no different.

Your hold on him oscillated between every type there was. Hard and fast. Light and slow. One-handed. Two-handed. Rough palm on his shaft. Dainty fingertips on his slit. Base to tip and back again. Each stage lasted for only a few seconds before you would switch it up, keeping him on the tip of his curled toes.

He had begged for it for oh so long, but now that he was finally receiving, he knew he had asked for more than he could handle - how it always seemed to go. You snickered, harsh breath tickling his tip, _too adorable for your own good._

While your right hand worked him, your left hand had kept a still stand between his legs. Save for the occasional brush against his quivering thighs and the two-handed twist move, there was a lot more you could be doing with it and with him. Deviant hand reached down and down, finding, seizing, kneading the sensitive sack.

With his eyes squeezed shut in pleasure, the grab caught him completely off guard. Levi arched his back against the mattress with a gasp that bordered on a scream, _“ahh’hah!”_

You gave a synthetically sympathetic gaze, but did not change your pace one bit. “Relax, Levi…” In opposite, you pumped him faster, “I’ve barely gotten started.”

Levi barely managed to peek his eyes open from their struggled squint, but when he did, the glint in his gaze made your heart jump, silently spelling out for you just how inexperienced he was.

“Oh, Levi…” you sighed. “I bet this is so new to you, isn’t it?” It was completely obvious, but you could not help yourself from having to hear the answer.

He felt overwhelmed with sensation, making it all the more difficult to form coherent thoughts, answer, and speech. _Fuck,_ if it did not feel amazing. _Fuck,_ if it was not embarrassing. The combination of both overstimulation and humiliation was even more incredible together. He whipped his head to the side, a futile attempt to hide his expression, and nodded into his shoulder.

You knit your brows and sharpened your voice. “Answer me.”

Veins made shadows in his neck, a hint to his immense blood rush, “Y-Yes…”

“You’re new to this?”

“I’m - I’m...!” You jerked and squeezed simultaneously and suddenly, causing even more precum to spill over and soak your hands, “ _Hah! Fuck…!_ I’m…” He strung the next words together at a speed as though they were one, “...new to this!”

To both of your surprise, he managed to answer you even in the throes of it. “Good boy…” you lowered your lips to his torso, placing slight and wet kisses from neck to chest to abdomen to V.

Levi sighed, slowly lowering himself back down to the mattress as if melting into your mouth. Your tongue trailed him, lips sucked him, teeth bit him. Meanwhile, your two-handed grasp between his legs never wavered. Pulling your mouth off his body, you took your sweet time admiring your masterpiece. Saliva mixed with sweat to encase his skin in a shimmer - everywhere you could get to that was. Raven bangs turned even darker when drenched, slicking to his face and contrasting his complexion. It was impossible to pick a favorite aspect, but his fucked-out vulnerability was something you could not imagine living without.

A sopping sound drew your attention from his upper half to lower half. You looked down to the hot mess in your hands. _Poor thing…_ His erection was completely sprung - on the fulcrum between sticking up perpendicularly and leaning all the way over onto his own stomach. Your hands kept him straight though, right where you wanted him. His tip leaked with his own arousal, dousing his entire length in a clear glisten that made him shine here too. Within your commanding grasp, he yearned and desired, length invariably twitching and aching in a frantic search for even more of you and your touch.

“You’ve been so good, Levi…” You lifted your hands up off of him for just a second. Once you did, you could not help the sadistic laugh as you watched the panic flash in his eyes. Orgasm denial, you were so good at it… too good at it. _Another night._ Slick fingers reached to the top of your zipper and pulled down, revealing your breasts and hardened nipples. It was the only sign of vulnerability you displayed, you liked to keep it that way. You had no doubt you could get him there without any reveal from you, proven plenty of times by the use of a blindfold, but your girls would turn this walk in the park into a piece of cake.

Steel grey gaze peeked out from under half-shut lids, taking in the sight of your cleavage. “C’Can I-” Levi paused and panted, catching only bits of his breath. “May I suck them, please?”

You ticked a corner of your lip up into a snarl, teasing, “You _may…_ but it’s up to you if you _can._ ”

His brows arched slightly, recognizing exactly what you meant. Lips trembled, pupils flickered as he took in the extent of his bondage. Thin red ropes made multiple revolutions around his ankles, tying his legs to posts at the foot of the bed. Two sets of cold metal cuffs linked his wrists to the headboard, shaky elbows bent perfectly in the air.

Levi licked his lips, using his body language as beckoning. He stuck his tongue out and leaned forward. He felt that the reward of sucking your nipples was hard-earned and barely achieved, but little did he know it was exactly how you planned it. Ties had just the right amount of leeway, Handcuffs had just the right number of links, and you had placed yourself that perfect spot along his height that he would be able to reach the goods - just enough.

As your sub, he knew to play gently. His chances to work you were rare in the first place and he would be damned to risk it. He knew you would not hesitate to take away any privilege or to make him work for it ten times over the next night. No matter how helpless he was to your taste, your feel, you... the threat of awaiting punishment never left his mind. With your nipple in his mouth, his moaning caused vibrations to ripple your nerves. You clenched your teeth, barring a gasp, refusing to indulge him more.

How tenderly he sucked your buds though was just how tough you were on him. The balance always needed to be kept, and that balance between the two of you was not balance at all. It was supposed to be you on the higher end of the scale, but the more he riled you, the closer to even you became. To restore the symmetry of your dom-sub relationship would require the anti: you would have to do him harder, faster, without mercy.

Though it was a total accident and truly all your doing - thanks to the stellar pleasure you provided in the handjob, when his teeth grazed your skin in exasperation, you knew you had to set him right. “Alright, young man...” You cursed, “I think you’ve had your fun.”

You cupped your breast in your hand and pulled yourself out of his mouth. An endearing string of saliva kept the two of you connected for just a moment before you snatched it out of the air and lubricated him with it. His eyes widened at both the sudden denial of your body but also the sudden arrival of what he knew was coming.

His labored breathing, violent pulsing, volume increasing, your hands instinctively drew the motions that provided more of it. From his lap, you rose your attention from his length to his face - making that eye contact you had both always agreed to hold. When his telltale signs emerged: head thrown back, flushed chest, bucking hips, you reminded him as you always did. “What do you say, Levi?”

“M- _Miss…_ ” His thrusts became both fast and drawn-out, both stronger and weaker. “Am - Am I allowed to… _nghhh!_ ”

“Allowed to what?” Now, mockingly, was when you slowed down for him - just when he did not want you to.

“Allowed to _cum…?_ ” His voice a dire whine. “ _Please… please let me cum..._ ”

A single nod brought your warm and wet tongue to his same-natured tip - it was the move that not only pushed him past the threshold, but threw him entirely into it. Two hands kept on him, encasing his length entirely through each and every surge. You kept him where he always had been, right below your chin. Maybe you should have known better or maybe it was perfect planning. After all his pent-up pleasure, it would be impossible for his orgasm to be anything less than explosive. Warm white strands shot up through the small space between you, painting your face with all of his passion. Even on the highest wave of his climax, he knew that he had fucked up, making the inevitable last wave seem all the more daunting, yet all the more desirable - 

\- for punishment was in order.


	34. Punishment (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A loose sequel to Inexperienced.

**WC: 1500 words  
Tags: NSFW, sub!levi, fem!dom!reader.**

His mess strown all over your face: just under the eyes, past the chin, and dripping down to the sheets underneath you. Though you had been the one to place him in such a precarious place, though you had been the one to force such an explosive orgasm, though you had been the one solely at fault for this, you would not bear the brunt of the consequences. You would see the punishment, but not receive it - deliver it.

You tsked your tongue - an all too familiar clicking that told him just how bad he had been - as you wiped his cum off your face. “ _Tsk tsk tsk_ , Levi…” You licked him off your fingertips, making sure to display that tantalizing suck right above your knuckle. “After all I do for you, how good I make you feel…” you gestured an open palm towards yourself covered in his paint, “this is how you thank me?”

Your eyes turned sharklike. No matter what he answered, there was no working his way out of what you had in mind, but you would be lying if you said his pathetic expression - the blend of regret, fear, and utter arousal - was not getting to you in some way. The relaxation of the post-coital glow was replaced by anxiety. The sweat you would normally bathe him clean of would instead remain for round two. The bondage he had ached to be free from, you would only make it tighter.

“I - I -” Fresh off the brink of climax, he still had not caught his breath. He swallowed and panted, “I’m so sorry… I didn’t mean to…!”

The apology was adorable, _but still,_ “not enough.” You shook your head and gave his dick a few slaps, bringing him right back to that hardness in just a matter of seconds. He was such a weak baby, but you had trained him so well. It was all your doing that he could even think to handle this much.

It was why, when you grabbed the favorite - the largest - vibrating dildo, you both knew he could take it.

Despite your drills, he always had that one look of dread, delight, and denial as he watched you pull it out of the dresser. “H-Hey…” Levi gulped, “I don’t think I can -”

You tilted your head and smirked with coercion. “Oh, Levi…” You began stroking the silicone’s length - all eight inches of it. “I know you can take it.”

Redder in the face. “B-But I’ve never…”

His brows were arched in apprehension, yours knit in confusion. You had given him many firsts, even one tonight, but you had used this toy many unforgettable times before. _What do you mean “never”?_

Lips stammered as he answered your silent question. “I’ve never had it… after I...” Shy hand slid down his sternum then stomach and took a meek hold of his erection - having just released but already revived again.

A single chuckle and shake of your head. Now you understood: he had never had it after already having one orgasm, never had it as punishment for bad behavior - which, in the case of tonight, was cumming all over your face. This device, you had only ever given it to him as a present, never as a penalty. At least, that was the way your sub viewed it. As a dominant, reward and reprimand, you thought them two sides of the same coin. Though they were objective opposites, to you, it simultaneously made no difference. Whether he was good or bad, he was getting one or the other either way.

“Levi…” your voice was conflicting - both soothing and unsettling: reassuring him, warning him. “I’ve got you. You’re in my hands.”

His breath caught in his throat. _That’s exactly it._

You reached out to him, dainty fingers and open palm beckoning for him to hold your hand. His eyes flickered with a hint of optimism. Given this kind gesture, maybe you would take it easy on him. The idea was quickly dismissed, though, when you yanked him up from the bed and pinned him to the wall: face, chest, hips, legs all flat against the plaster. From lying down on the bed to being slammed against the slate - from your cooing and tenderness to your haste and roughness - he was in whiplash. Levi turned his head to the side, hot cheek against the cold slate, and winced. His struggle music to your ears.

One hand met the small of his back - keeping him pinned - while the other worked on preparing yourself. You adorned the harness without looking, eyes on him and his sorry state instead. Black straps tightened around your curves - inadvertently accentuating every single one of them. Your entire body glistened from head to toe. The pink toy sparkled between your legs. Behind him, your striking appearance. At his hips, the daunting length. The scene made him lick his lips and breathe even faster. More so, his chest began to heave and his member began to leak.

You pressed your front to his back: solid length dwindling just outside his cheeks, breath both chill and hot at his nape. “Are you ready, Levi?”

Despite his obvious, excitable, physical reaction, he was internally anxious and wary. He knew the pain and the pleasure that were coming, he knew that he wanted it, he knew that he could never be adequately prepared for it. That fire you were smothering by a cool exterior, he knew he would soon be engulfed by it. In this dom-sub relationship, the exchange, the trust, the relinquishing of all control was a staple that was never predictable, a regular that always kept both of you on your toes - tonight, literally.

Levi turned over his shoulder. Beneath slickened bangs, steel gaze melted to meet yours. His answer told you all you needed to hear, “Anything for you.”

You smirked briefly before whipping your hand to the front of his throat, squeezing tightly and drawing the first of many whimpers you knew you would hear. “Just remember, Levi…” you bit down on his neck and spoke against his skin, feeling shivers sail down his spine, “you deserve this.”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, one you did not let him finish. “Y’Yes, mis _\- ahh!_ ”

Before he could address you, you rammed yourself entirely into him, cutting him off and just getting started. With your first shove, his gland was already pushed, played, and pleased. Feet grounded in the floor, giving the foundation needed for perfect leverage. His hands pressed flat against the wall, striving to find stability but only pushing him further down your length with every thrust. Sounds of your exertion fell on the cusp of his ear, making sounds of his arousal bounce off the walls. It was all a cascading snowball: each symptom riling the one that came before and after.

With one hand, fingertips pressed against the veins in his neck, making his head spin and sensation heighten. With the other, a vice grip on his hip, fingernails making crescents in his skin. Both hands kept him pinned in the position you needed: against the wall, pressed to you, helpless.

His typically deep and sturdy voice grew light and airy, a contrast you always adored, but one that usually did not appear this quickly. Then, you saw the perspiration his raven locks, the flush in his pale skin, the weak in his buckling knees, and remembered all too vividly: this was round two, an instant one at that.

At his vulnerability, you smirked, _so fucking cute_. Another night, you would tell him - praise him, but this was punishment after all.

Prior to your next move, one you knew would be too much, you convinced that this was not you, but him. “You did this to yourself, you know.” While your left hand maintained its squeeze around his neck, your right hand reached down and to his front, taking a fierce grip of his twitching member and working him at a punishing pace.

He had just received his first handjob and you were already giving him his second. If being obliterated by you from behind was not enough, you were now jerking him off at the same time. So inexperienced, so overstimulated, tears pricked his eyes as his cries fell out loud, “Hah! _Hah’ahh!_ F- _Fuck…_ ” Stammering lips made a pathetic attempt at your name as he panted, “I - _I can’t...!_ ”

The evidence deemed otherwise. His thrusts in your hand and his clenching around your length screamed to you as you did him, “You can and you’re going to!”

As your fucking grew faster, he broke along with his sentiments. “You’re… _You’re…!_ ”

You bit his ear and snarled, “Tell me, Levi.”

His cock surging, his insides throbbing, waves crashing throughout every inch of him, it was too fucking much, he could not deny it. “You’re breaking me!”

_Good._ You drifted your nail along his drenched slit as you angled your hips upward and further. _Mercy? Never heard of it._

Every muscle shook. Eyes rolled into the back of his head. Entire body trembled. He grit his teeth and pinched himself, working his damnedest to finish right so as not to receive such punishment again, maybe even a reward if he did good enough. On his last gasp of air, he obeyed your rule and confessed, _“I’m cum’ming!”_

You snickered at his efforts, keeping your dirty little secret safe within:

Pain or pleasure, punishment or reward, _he’s fucked either way._


	35. Making Time (semi-NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hange takes the kids to the park, giving Levi and Reader some time to catch up on things they’ve missed. 
> 
> Dad Levi is my weakness. Here’s a lil’ parenting drabble!

**Word Count: 1500 words  
Tags: fluff, semi-NSFW, parenting, dad!Levi, mom!fem!reader**

“We’ll…” Their lips turned downward into a shaky frown. “We’ll miss you, mama…”

You gave a kindred gaze and hugged them to the sides of your thighs, “I’ll miss you too, kiddos!”

Well, of course you would miss them - you were their mother after all. However, when Hange rang, asking if they could take the young ones to the park today, it was the fastest text reply you ever sent. _Yes! Of course! They would love that! When works for you!?_ Neither you nor Levi could remember the last time you had alone time, probably not since you were first pregnant - and your oldest was four. Four years of the nonstop job of parenting, a couple hours without interruption - nor the threat of it - had been long-awaited and long-deserved. Now that the opportunity had finally presented itself, neither of you could hold back your enthusiasm. Yet, saying bye to them now, you masked it as best you could.

“Hey, brats,” Levi placed a hand atop each of their heads and tousled their hair, “what about your dad?”

The little ones sniffed their snot, wiped their noses, and did not even look at him as they spoke without trouble, “Bye, dad.”

They were so distraught to leave you but were totally fine with saying farewell to their father. Levi knit his brows and crossed his arms, “Oi…”

You bit on your knuckle and snickered. With one hand, you opened the door, letting them out. With the other hand, you gave a lighthearted wave and sent them off with their babysitter. “Bye bye, you two!” With a singsong voice, you teased, “Be good and maybe Auntie Hange will take you for ice cream…” You gave Hange a wink which they reciprocated.

The kids looked at each other and giggled. Holding hands, jumping up and down, they skipped through the front door, dragging Hange along with them. “Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go!”

Squatted down to meet the kids’ level, Hange struggled to walk at a height half their own. Still, they managed to turn over their shoulder and waved goodbye to you parents - their smile even giddier than those of the children.

And just like that, you two were alone.

As soon as the door clicked shut, you oscillated scratches up and down his back. While your words were innocent, the tone in your voice and the look in your eyes were not, “Seems like they’ll have a lot of fun.”

Levi turned the deadbolt behind them. One hand pressed flat on the door, one hand caressed your chin, he turned to you and smirked, “I think we will, too.”

// // //

Though you had two hours, give or take, neither of you wasted a second’s time. The moment you were alone was the moment you pounced on the other. You jumped into Levi’s arms, his hands strong underneath the back of your thighs. Behind his torso, you anchored your ankles together, locking yourself around him. _Criss cross applesauce._

He carried you from the front door to the couch. Though his eyes were squinted shut in the kiss, he knew the route perfectly. What was impossible to remember, however, was the everchanging sprawl of LEGOs on the floor. One stride away from the sofa, a block managed to land right beneath the middle of his foot. Levi cursed against your lips, _“Ngh… fuck!”_

His exhale, you took it in with an enamored gasp, _“Levi…”_ What you interpreted as an outpour of passion was actually a cry of pain. He was quick to go along with it.

Even as he stumbled over, he made sure to protect you. Hand at the back of your head reclined you carefully. All that practice carrying babies showed - cradling having been tacked on to his impressive list of skills.

Misplaced toys made him land on top of you. For the first time, he was thankful for the mess - this position more than worth the sting. Without even being touched yet, you already felt his hardened member against your thighs, your own arousal warming and pooling between your legs.

Between frantic kisses, Levi breathed against your ear, “I needed this, baby. I can’t even tell you…” His hips began to rock - directly, innately, perfectly - against yours, _“how fucking much I needed this!”_

Few and far between were your chances to talk dirty. This was the first drink of water after a walk through the desert. Immediately, your panties were soaked and desire dripping. “Levi, baby, me too…” you cried, “I’ve needed you for so long...”

True to your word, you hooked your elbow at the back of his undercut, tugging him back to the kiss. Tongue swirled feverishly around yours. Chapped lips felt heavenly. You had no makeup. He was still in pajamas. No matter, neither of you would trade this chance for anything in the world.

Rolling your head back against the arm rest, your eyes fluttered shut as you mumbled, _“Oh, Levi…”_

// // //

With the slam of the screen porch, you were both jolted out of bliss. It was a euphoria, but not exactly post-coital. You blinked twice as Levi shook his head. Looking to each other, you silently conveyed, _What happened?_ A balled fist rubbing his eyes, drool caked at the corner of his mouth, the folds of your fabric printed on his cheek told all.

_We - We fell asleep?_

You had come to the couch with dirty intentions, but the position did not quite reflect that. Levi joined you on the couch - halfway draped atop of you, halfway at your side. Somewhere between missionary and spooning had brought you to a middleground that looked completely innocent. Not only that, but you had not even gotten to undressing - both still in your joggers, sweatshirts, and oversized tees. It truly just looked like you only took a nap. _Not only looked like, that’s exactly what happened._

As your sense of hearing revived, you heard Hange’s footsteps come in - heavier this time. Indeed, as they rounded the corner, you saw your little ones clung to them like chimps: one in a piggyback ride - arms clasped around their neck, one sitting on their foot, entire body wrapped around their leg. As they entered the living room, your kids pulled their hair and tickled their foot, showing no interest in reuniting with the parents they were so sad to leave. All signs pointed: everyone enjoyed their time.

When you opened your mouth to speak, you yawned instead. “How was the -” Voice still groggy, you cleared your throat. ”How was the park?”

It was the loudest you heard them scream in a while, and that was saying something. “FUNNNN!”

“Yeah? You love Auntie Hange?”

“YEAHHHHH!” Another new high.

Given Hange’s gleeful expression, you could not tell who had more fun. “We tried ringing the doorbell, but I think mom and dad didn’t hear us…” Hange gave a knowing smirk, one that made you blush and Levi twitch. _Of course…_ You had not actually gotten to it, but Hange assumed you did. The worst of both worlds.

A quick change of subject. “Hey.” Levi chastised, “Take your shoes off at the door.” Whether he was being serious about cleanliness or improvising for privacy, you could not tell. Maybe both.

As soon as they rounded the corner, you began to hush whispers to each other.

You ran your hand through his locks, booped his nose, and teased, “You’re such an old man…”

Through his bangs, he glanced up to you and growled, “Don’t pretend you didn’t enjoy that nap.”

At first, you were disappointed about how the time actually played out. However, as you took in his appearance, that feeling was buried by a new perspective. His half-shut lids, dark circles under his eyes, and his unruly bedhead, you instead felt appreciation for the rest you - but more importantly - he was able to get. Not only was he an insomniac, he was also a hard worker, a good father, an amazing husband. You choked up a bit, _you deserve the world._

At your sudden emotion, Levi gave your hair a playful tousle as he did with the kids. “Seems like you could use some more sleep.”

As tiny footsteps were reproaching, tried and tired tears began to brim. Past them, you peeked up to your husband with a longing gaze, “I just wish I could show you…” you searched for the right words, “how much I love you.”

His eyes widened briefly, surprised with your sentiment. It was always understood that you missed your time together. However, just how much it had gotten to you caught him off guard in a way that was bittersweet.

Levi brushed the hair out of your face and planted a kiss on your forehead, “Honey, trust me...” he held your cheek in his hand and thumbed your tears away, “I know.”

As a parent, sleep and sex was a choice. Like food and water, though, you could not live with only one or the other. With this sleepy, sudden, and sensual confession, your longing only deepened. _If only there was more time…_

Levi’s face brightened, struck with a new idea. It was taking a chance, but given what he had just seen, he felt optimistic about the odds.

“Hey, Hange...” Fresh out of sleep, his voice was gruff. Desire unsatisfied, his tone was pleading. “How about an overnight?”


	36. A Long Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Priority Request. Every day is a long one in the Scouts. Thankfully, you two have each other to come home to.

**Word count: 1800  
Tags: fluff, humor, canonverse, fem!reader**

Practically every day in the Scout Regiment was a long one, but this one was especially for both of you.

Hange and Moblit had drafted you into an experiment. From sunrise to sunset, in alignment with their circadian rhythm, you ran tests on Sawney and Bean. Frantic note-taking, tool fetching, and grappling away from a series of sudden bites - the day and its activities had taken all you had mentally, physically, emotionally.

Meanwhile, Erwin and Levi were going over the regiment’s numbers. Expenses, enrollment, casualties, fatalities. For as big of brains as Erwin had, he was not the savviest with math. Maybe his mind was just fit for a larger scale, Levi’s for a smaller one. Things could have gone much faster, but his desire to learn was persistent in every way. It would have been easier if allowed to breeze through the spreadsheets himself. Instead, he had to slow down and take the time to explain every step to his superior. Levi grit his teeth, _the unyielding desire for understanding_ , he was a true commander - he had to give him that.

Today’s itinerary left both of you tired. Sure, the timing was a bit unfortunate, but still nowhere near the worst the regiment had seen. On your own, it would have been harder, but thankfully, you had each other.

As soon as you got back, you felt a pull to the couch that was nearly gravitational. The second you flopped down was the second your eyes shut.

With the click of his key in the lock, you were woken up from your nap Remembering the schedule he had today, you tried to pull yourself together just for him. “Ah! Levi!” You sat up and rubbed your eyes. “How was your day?”

At the front door, you heard him sigh. Levi kicked off his boots, shouldered off his jacket, and tossed it onto the armchair. Immediately and without a word, that told you all you needed to know. He was always meticulous about putting things in their proper place. The fact that he hung his uniform _wherever,_ he must have been completely drained today.

When he found you sprawled out, he realized that you had just as demanding a day as he had. Your uniform was still on, even the belts. Still, you had at least managed to take your shoes off, saving the couch, saving him the headache of dusting it later. His lip twitched upward. Even without energy, your consideration never failed.

It showed in more ways than one. You shot up from the sofa and into the kitchen. Straight off your power nap, the quick transition had you in whiplash. At the cupboard, you held your head and winced, using one hand to pull out ingredients for Levi’s favorite: a steak dinner with carrots, potatoes, bread and butter.

On the outside, he remained cool. On the inside, he smiled. Even in this state of yours, you still attempted to cook a feast. You were such a trooper, he had no doubt that you could pull it off, but at just what speed? Levi came to your side and rubbed the small of your back. “What can I do?”

“Nothing!” Absentmindedly, you brushed him off, “I’ve got it.”

Levi rolled his eyes, he should have expected you would answer like that. “Hey, come on,” he beckoned, “let me help you.”

“It’s fine, really! I know you’ve had a long day.” You tried hard to hide your exhaustion, a fabricated cheerfulness.

However, after the years you had spent together, he saw right through it. Not only that, but you were not the only one who remembered the other’s itinerary. “And so have you.”

From the countertop, you lifted your gaze to meet his - solid steel eye contact never wavering. Just as easily as he read your synthetic tone, you knew he was not going anywhere. His role of captain was so ingrained, it was not just a job but a part of who he was. As such, whether he was at work or at home, some traits never left. The stubbornness, attention, care required on duty was the same that faced you now. Never had you been able to discern - were these side effects that came of his position or exactly what led him to it? _Chicken and the egg._

_Well, you asked for it._ You tried hard to suppress your amusement but the attempt was futile. “Plus…” you chuckled between words, “you can’t cook for shit.”

Now that he knew you were being honest, Levi smirked a bit, _There she is._ “At least let me cut something.” There was no way he was unfit for that.

With a smile on your face, one only he could give, you dumped pounds of vegetables into his lap. “Start off with washing these.” You teased, “We’ll see if you can at least do that.”

_A challenge to clean? A challenge to cut?_ Levi gave you a look that made your heart jump. _You’re on._

// // //

Showing Levi how to chop vegetables was wholesome yet surreal. You could not help but think back to when you first enlisted. Back then, in the forest full of titan dummies, he showed you how to slice a nape. Now, in your kitchen, you were showing him how to dice an onion. You chuckled to yourself, just how life-changing a relationship could be.

In the sink, the produce was sparkling, but it was not good enough for him just yet. You had zoned out a bit before realizing: the roast was ready for the oven, but he still had not even gotten to chopping. “Oh my God, Levi…”

“What?”

“I can see my reflection in the potatoes.” You laughed, “I think it’s time to get on with it.”

He knit his brows and questioned, “You want me to slash them now?”

“ _Slice_ , Levi.” You corrected. “You can _slice_ them now.”

Levi tucked his lips under his teeth, not quite yet satisfied in terms of cleanliness, and you read his thoughts perfectly. “Don’t forget, we’re going to cook them, too.” You pat his shoulder. “The heat will kill anything you didn’t already!”

Given his ineptitude in the kitchen, he supposed he had to take your word for it. You began taking the vegetables out of the sink while he grabbed a knife. In fact, _armed himself_ with a knife was a better way to put it. From the wooden block, he yanked out a blade at an alarming speed. Faster than you could see, more times than you could count, he spun it in his hand until finding his trademark reverse grip. He had just pulled out a cleaver as he would a fighting knife. The thug of the underground, humanity’s strongest soldier, not for a second would he let you forget just who you were dating.

Instinctively, you threw your hands in front of your face, a panicked shield. “Levi, are you kidding me?!”

Though his eyes went to you, he continued to chop perfectly even slices - quickly at that. “What?”

There was so much explaining to do, you did not even know where to start, _Maybe I just shouldn’t._ You placed a hand on his head and tousled his hair. “You’re carving the meat next time.”

// // //

The roast would take a handful of hours, but after days like these, it was nice to have a wait - freedom from obligations, a mandatory slowdown, something to anticipate.

After you placed the pan in the oven, Levi looped his arms over your chest, hugging you from behind. He buried his face in your neck and breathed in - eyes widening instantly.

“Hey, brat…” He mumbled, “when was the last time you showered?”

Most people would have turned red instantly, but you were used to his way of speaking. In fact, this evening, he was putting it kindly. You bat back, “Unlike you, old man, I was out in the burning hot sun all day - jumping out of titan jaws.”

Levi chuckled against your neck, sending shivers down your spine. He drifted his hold from your shoulders, down your arms, past your wrists, and held your hands. Fingers intertwined, he whispered in your ear, “I’ll get the bath started.” Deviant digits reached to your inner thighs, hooking under your belts and giving two tugs. “Get undressed and meet me there.”

You reached back and ran fingers through his undercut, _“Yes, Captain.”_

// // //

You were one of his favorite things to do after a long day, and as tired as you were, you still strove to provide. Approaching the bathroom, you had a sexy strut in mind. However, when you turned the door handle and opened up, your stupid grin killed it immediately. Humanity’s strongest had arms on both sides of the tub, head leaned back over the rim, lips parted and released sleepy snores. He was out. You placed your face in your palm and laughed. Who were you kidding? You were both completely out of it.

Towel dropping to the floor, approaching footsteps, the plip of your foot dipping in the water, no sound was not enough to wake him from his sleep. He looked so peaceful - bangs strayed, breathing steady, skin shining - you almost did not want to. He was in absolute bliss. When your legs brushed against him, the touch was enough to pull him out of it.

“Morning, sleepyhead.”

Levi balled his fist and rubbed his eyes, “Morning… I think?” Under the water, you brought your hands to your heart. _Too cute._

You poured some soap into your hands, lathered, and took hold of his arm. “So, tell me…” from wrist to shoulder, you started to wash him, “how was tutoring today?”

Levi looked down to his lap and shook his head. “I wish he would just let me do it.”

You peeked up to him and smiled, “Seeking a promotion?”

A regular joke - every time either of you complained about the higher-ups, you would toss the barb at the other with that perfect mix of sarcasm and snark. He always responded the same old way, _you’re the only brat I need._

It was endearing, but something about tonight, he knew he could articulate better. You were the only one he needed, but you were so much more than that. The one who would take off her shoes before flopping on the couch, the one who cooked a spread with utmost patience, the one who cleaned and cared for others before herself, all while she was just as exhausted as him. _Anyone would be lucky to have a brat like you._

His pause was abnormally long, making you lift your attention from your scrubbing to his gaze. Through slickened bangs, with a slight blush, past a white and foggy steam, a smile had warmed across his face as he took in the love in front of him - as he took in you. 

It was rare to ever see him like this, especially after a long day. Your voice caught in your throat, _Levi?_

Levi cupped your chin, touch warm and tender on your skin, and brought you to a kiss. No matter how tired, he always kissed you with everything he had - the way that you deserved.

After pulling away, he held your cheeks in his hands and pressed your forehead to his. “I love you too much to do that.”


	37. For the Cycle (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someday, you will both have your own place where you can do whatever you please. Until then, though, Levi is still determined to make you feel that way.

**Word count: 3700  
Tags: NSFW, levi x reader, modern AU, fem!reader**

_That meaningless game became quite essential. Before, it was just some reason to continue spending time together. “Until the end of this show”, “Once this inning is over.” Now, it served as static noise. As your cries of pleasure turned louder and louder, all others would only hear the audience, announcers, and advertisements. On the other hand, he had a front-row seat to your amplifying sounds - your biggest fan._

An unspoken ritual. Neither of you wanted the night to end, but as you still lived under your parents’ roof, him with numerous roommates, sleepovers were simply not an option. The next best thing was to stay over as long as you could keep your eyes open. Sometimes, longer than that - dozing off at his house only for him to wake you up in the late-night AM hours, _Hey, brat. Let’s not piss off your folks again._

It was the only real choice you had, and logistically, it was not too bad. Your parents had not set a strict curfew, but rather a principled one, _Be home before I wake up._ The insomniac he was, the excellent driver he was, it was no bother for him to bring you back at any hour. He would never complain about that aspect of it, rather, the emotional one. Desperately, you both longed for the day when you would move out, get your own place, and stay every night together - no drive home at all.

Such was your situation tonight. On the TV, two baseball teams you did not care about, playing in the background as you cuddled on the couch. Levi would tuck you under his arm, curl you up in the crook of his chest, and simply hold you as the night went by.

It felt far from simple, though. Your sleepy sighs on his skin, the way you squirmed closer and closer to him, how your hair tickled his neck, no matter how serene the scene seemed, his heart always raced. His scent of clean laundry and faint mint, the way his defined arm held you tight against him, how the calm breaths in his chest made your body rise and fall with his, no matter how plain it appeared, you always fell asleep with a smile on your face.

// // //

Whenever asked, you always said baseball was your favorite sport. More accurately, though, it was the baseball season that was your favorite. There were more teams than you could count and all of them played almost daily. Teams across the country meant games across time zones. Your entertainment moved from east coast to west. The latest of games starting well after sunset, even in the summer solstice. No matter the day or time, there was always something to throw on the TV.

Not only did games start late and was there a game every night, but baseball games were the longest of all sports. While they always went by too fast, the typical one lasted over three hours. Extra innings - an annoyance to most - were always welcome in your eyes.

Mornings after, his roommates were always surprised. Casual conversations, _Did you catch who won the game last night?_ From the next room over, he would always call back a perfect 10-second summary. The guys would exchange silent glances, wondering when exactly he had taken a liking to sports.

When your father asked what you did at Levi’s, you would soundly answer, _watched the games._ When he then asked for the results, though, you started to falter. You dug deep into your memory. Sometimes, you could remember the distinct final call, _The Angels sweep at home!_ Sometimes, you could not remember, and suddenly, you were late to something and had to leave immediately.

Levi’s newfound sports knowledge, your unexplained absence of it, they were both huge tells, but no one could quite discern as to what.

While you fell asleep, Levi could not and would not join you. Either his endurance eventually caught up to him or he needed pitch black, total silence, and then a lucky dice roll to get some rest. Glare of the television and sound of the crowd did not fit his precise requirements, but even if they did, he would not want to sleep anyway. Times like these were too enjoyable, not worth trading for anything in the world.

Except one thing.

There was something about tonight, you did not fall into your typical slumber. Heat in your core, a burning desire, the crackling fire he had started and kindled within you _all too hot to ignore_. Normally, you would be passed out, but now, a blazing energy that refused to be smothered.

You felt your cheeks warming up, you dipped your head under the quilt and whispered, “Hey.”

Levi raised his brows and looked down to you, surprised to find you awake. “Hm?” A low rumble from his throat, you felt your heart skip a beat.

Beneath the blanket, your shy smile was hidden. In your voice, however, your eagerness shined through, “Can I sit on your lap?”

“Tch,” amused. Strong hands at your sides hoisted you up onto him, “you don’t have to ask that.”

You gleamed, “Thanks,” wriggling yourself into just the right position.

Even after you were seated, his hands remained on your skin, “Not tired?”

You shrugged, “Not really.” Levi knit his brows, your sleep schedule clearly off tonight, that among other things. Your voice strangely energetic, “Who’s playing tonight?”

Behind you and out of sight, confusion tainted his face. You never showed any interest in sports, but now you sounded so eager. Internally, he asked himself, _What’s going on with her?_ Out loud, he answered you, “Dodgers at Mariners.”

“Mmm,” you affirmed. “Who’s winning?”

Sure, the score was offscreen - the broadcast had just cut to commercial - but if you had been awake this whole time, what had you been focusing on? Levi jostled you on his lap, a silent tease, “Still scoreless.”

“Ah…” clearly uninterested, yet, you kept asking questions, “how many innings left?”

Flatly, “Middle of the second.” 

_Lots of time then._ “Interesting.” Levi nearly scoffed, given that you had dated for years, he picked out your tone as anything but. Truth was - you were totally distracted and he was starting to recognize it.

All night, you had felt warm at his side, but sat atop of him now, you felt a different heat pooling. You also felt a growing intuition: you were not alone in that feeling. Clearing your throat, you rolled your hips around, trying to discern if what you felt underneath you was what you thought - hoped - it was.

Dainty hands cupped his knees, using them for leverage. Pushing and pulling yourself back and forth, you left it to your curves to figure out what was beneath them. While they were well-acquainted, this was challenge mode. You pretended to pay attention to the screen, neglecting to look down and see for yourself. The identification was made much more difficult now, with him still fully-clothed. Hem of his shirt met the waistband of his jeans, that meeting hidden by a leather belt with metal buckle. You shifted yourself this way and that way, desire blinding you to how obviously directed your directions were.

Even though he was behind you, Levi donned his poker face. He stifled his mirth, in disbelief that you thought he would not notice such an action. _Adorable_. Instead, he let you continue to think that your thirst went undetected. Unmuffled you was his favorite version. When met with it, though, he had to muddle himself if he wanted its stay. Levi tipped his chin downward, tongue scooping up his collar, teeth biting it down in his mouth. He silenced the evidence of his stimulation as you continued to ride him, increasingly unashamedly.

When your lower back met his navel, that was the position that gave you the discovery. “Levi,” you exhaled his name, “are you hard?”

He rolled his eyes, lip twitching, “... so mature.” Chastising yet enchanted tone - you felt your layers turn damp.

You snickered. At that moment, both of you were without a clue as to what had gotten into you. Never would you mock him in such an intimate setting, but on the other hand, you had never felt like this before. This strange spark within you taunted your lover, “We’re not even undressed, but I can already feel you.”

His cheeks turned bright red - whatever was coming, he was glad the lights were off for it - yet the command in his voice remained, “I’d like to see -” a sharp inhale interrupted him, “- you take it better.”

You heard your heart thump - the signal to start. Fingers reached behind you, grasping his shoulders, using them to pivot yourself around and face him. Looking him dead in the eyes, you brushed your lips against his. Words spoken felt not your own, but also the purest form of yourself, “I will.”

One brow cocked, his lips their usual line, expression silently conveyed, _Go ahead. Try._

Though he had not spoken, you did as you were told. At each side of his hips, knees dug into the sofa. At the back of his undercut, fingers clasped around his nape. Elbows perched on his shoulders, chests pressed together, heartbeats against the other, everything was set up for success. Now, the look in his eyes told, _It’s up to you._

Finally, you gazed down to what you had been perched on all along. In the waist of his jeans, a solidity you had never seen before. Folds of his fabric made ridges along his range, the mountain in his pants just begging to be climbed. Subconsciously, you licked your lips. You could only imagine how good it would feel. The angel and devil on your shoulder for once in agreement, _What are you waiting for?_

With haste, you threw yourself down. It was only then that you realized just how vulnerable you already were. Pressing yourself entirely onto him, you immediately seized up at the sensation. The build-up was not just these past few minutes, but actually much longer than you thought. Squinted eyes, grit teeth, you were already too fucked out to notice his snicker, _Pathetic._

You thought about stripping yourselves down, but after the first few rocks, the idea was completely lost on you. The silk of your panties riddled your folds. The denim in his jeans added an unpredictable and ever-changing texture. There was always the risk of the door opening, but in your frenzied state, danger was at the back of your mind, pleasure at the forefront.

Even him, his well being, his comfort, was not of any concern to you. Nails dug into his shoulders, all of your weight crashed onto him, a punishing pace and merciless friction as you ground yourself against his weakness. At times less crazed, you would think of your appearance. Tonight was just a different kind of night. Instead of combing fingers through your hair, you let your locks fly wherever they went. Instead of ousting your breasts, you let them bounce as natural. Instead of keeping composed, you let your jaw loose, let your nose crinkle, let your eyes flutter. You had not tried for the glamour shot, but ironically, Levi found tonight your best one of all.

He more than thought to add his work to the mix, but based on his read, it seemed you would get there without needing any help. He relished in your appearance, your vulnerability. With your eyes squeezed shut, he allowed himself a satisfied smile.

“Le - Levi…” your head was nearly aching, words incoherent as that one and only thought pressed on, “I - _I think I…!_ ”

Mentally, he leaned back and crossed his arms behind his head. Literally, he had just sat there while you did all the work, yet, you felt and he saw all the benefit.

Your thrusts increased instinctively in an innate chase of that high. Exertion from the exercise caused temperatures to rise. A series of hot pants flurried on his neck, he felt his shirt start to stick to his skin. Underneath you, he shuddered, yet tried to keep his still. Clearly, you were getting what you wanted. The last thing he wanted to do was disrupt it.

And in that instant, your threshold was broken. A bundling in your core was unwound throughout your entire body. Lightning zapped every one of your joints, stunning you in his grasp. A breathless series of gasps fell on his ears as you buried yourself in the crease of his neck. Silenced to everyone else, loudened for him. It was hard to remember the last time it had felt this good. Really, with this staggering lust, it was hard to remember anything at all.

As you trembled through the last wave, his hands held you tight, always at your aid. Surprised and pleased, he teased, “Enjoy yourself?”

Your sex still singing, _Isn’t that obvious?_ “Mmm…” affirmation nearly silent, you nodded, “Mhm…”

“Well,” he scratched your back, post-coital habit, “I’m glad you got what you were looking for...”

Though the cooing was meant to be calming, your nerves were set on alarm. _Wait, but…_ Your gaze darted frantically, _What if I…?_

You pressed your palms to his pecs, propping yourself up to meet his eye contact. Pupils flickered. “Can -” you paused, reconciling your wants, admitting them to both yourself and him, “Can I have another?”

The time between your question and his response felt like an eternity. Shock was a rare sight on him. Your heart was pounding off of one climax and to another.

A sadistic smile across his lips, Levi threw his hand in your hair and tugged your ear to his teeth. After a harsh bite, following nibble, and soothing lick, he snarled, “As many as you like.”

You shuddered in his arms, “L’Levi…?”

His words on your ear sent chills down your spine, _“Use me.”_

// // //

Lips parted in a visual stammer, wordlessly asking, _Use you?_

Levi lowered his brows. Gaze was objectively serious, but this close, you could tell there was something more. Clenched teeth. Hard conviction. “Let me be your fucktoy.”

Selfless as you usually were, some unknown force made you completely the opposite. Focusing solely on yourself was of course selfish, but now that he was permitting it, asking for it, ordering it, that ounce of remaining consideration was satisfied _among other things_.

You bit your bottom lip in excitement. Starting at his V, palms pushed his shirt all the way up to his collarbone. You kept the sleeves on, though, the collar over his neck. Not for the chance that someone walked down, but because you were well familiar with his love-hate relationship with limits. Once they revealed his chest, nails continued over his back, down to his midsection, digging and scratching for the surface. If you drew blood, you did not care. All that mattered- to both of you - was getting you the stability you needed as you worked for round two. 

Shoulders rolled back, pushing your front to his. Inadvertent arch in your back gave a new angle. Places outside the epicenter now got their turn at aftershock.

The heat where your hips met was incinerating - the feeling incapacitating. The stretch of fabric along your slit had been coated in your slick, only making its sliding sweeter - kinder - on your skin. The hardening wedged between your creases - even through your articles - filled you up everywhere you needed.

Once again, you began to rock. Back and forth, up and down, you played single player, him your joystick. 

Though the storm had passed, you were trying to stir up another - and succeeding. You felt your fluids slip, unknowingly staining him, perhaps earning you a punishment from the hands of your clean freak. Muscles began to shake. Hairs stood on end. Your lungs commenced their tradition, rising and falling, faster and faster until -

“Le - _Levi_ , I…”

“What?” He gasped, he himself breathless. Still, he made his best attempt at mocking. In his voice, he pretended - painfully oblivious, “What is it, baby?”

“I - I…” voice caught in your throat, _“I - I’m gonna...”_

“Already, huh?” He chided. As endless as they came, he would be entertained by them likewise. _“Give me another, sweetheart.”_

Embarrassment that normally screamed, tonight, you could hardly hear it. Shame completely drowned out by the overwhelming pleasure you felt. It demanded you entirely, no room to spare for even modesty’s passing thought.

Hands made fists in his hair, forcing his lips to yours. Tongue demanded its entrance. Into his mouth, you moaned. While unorthodox, he thought, the sexiest way to subdue your sounds. Tasting you, your enervation, your pleasure, forever his favorite flavor.

Honey surged through your veins, dripped through your capillaries, coursed from head to toe. You felt your throat tighten, it felt hard to breathe, but that was exactly how you liked it.

All axons were out of your control. Completely shaking, you could not help but bite him here and there, drawing flinches of startle and exhilaration from your provider. You had never done it before, but instantly, you both knew: it was something you would return to again.

It was hard to tell when it began and when it stopped, where it started and where it ended. Your body continued to move, whether on the prolonging of your current high or on the chase for another, you could not tell and you did not care. A pleasured headache for which you wanted no reprieve.

It was almost a fever dream. For being the one that Levi called his, you had always considered yourself the luckiest girl alive. This was something more, though. The luckiest girl alive having the night of her life - a fest you never wanted to end.

Completely overstimulated, it nearly started to hurt, but not bad enough. “I - I want more.”

A single chuckle under his breath, he teased, “What’s gotten into you tonight?”

In that moment, you did not know, but if even a single one of your brain cells was active, it would have been easy to identify. It was not only him - his charm, his looks, his personality - but the entire setting. With looming parents at your place and multiple roommates at his, too few and far between were your windows for spontaneity. Too rare was the chance to act on impulse. Now that the opportunity had presented itself, even your body’s instinct knew to make the most of this night.

Those thoughts were beyond you now, though. A stuttering “S-Sorry” the most you could manage as you already felt another coming on. “I’m - I’m…”

“Yeah?” Intrigue made his voice light and shaky. Such an uncommon divergence from his low and stoic tone did not go unnoticed. You felt yourself begin to throb, your core start to twist. Underneath it all, though - out of sight and out of mind - your partner was going through a reaction of his own. Wanting to be your perfect device, he had glued himself to the cushions for your entire fuckfest. But his groin had a mind of its own. Inch by careful inch along your self-serving spree, his composure began to waver. Pushing himself further up to you, he yearned - ached - for every bit more of you. So blatantly self-centered, he knew you did not intend it. Still, there was no ounce of doubt: this was the _best fucking tease_ he had ever experienced in his life. Levi scoffed, rolling his eyes, releasing a shaky breath, _and you’re not even trying._

You felt the dam start to crack again, the waters rapidly rising, _“c’cumming… again!”_

Levi grit his teeth, but he had ground himself so much already. “A- _ahh… hah-!_ ” Levi struggled to speak, “A-Again?”

For the first time all night, you slowed. His endeavor gave you qualm, that ounce of self-doubt ringing on increasingly high alert.

“It - It doesn’t…” each passing second, it was harder to think, harder to breathe, harder to speak. You swallowed, gaping, “It doesn’t hurt - does it, Levi?”

Glimmer danced across his locks as he shook his head rapidly. It was not a wince of pain, just a grasp at self control. Having you ride him nonstop for this long, it was indeed a trial - but not an unwelcome one. _“Not at all.”_ Through his bangs, silver eyes met yours, _“Now just shut up and cum.”_

Proving his point, he brought his hands to the sides of your waists. Not forcing, rather, encouraging - he helped your body along your crafted path. After hundreds of repetitions, he had it well memorized. Always in tune with you, tonight was no different. He did not sabotage your rhythm, only enforced it.

Increased friction. Increased speed. With his support, you were allowed to focus your attention solely to your pleasure. Truly, that was what you had been doing all evening as you worked for your orgasms alone, only now _even more._

// // //

Of all the games he had sat through with you, tonight was the first one where he had lost count of the score.

Thinking as hard as he could, with you passed out atop him, he pet the back of your head, trying to remember. Each time he scratched your back was a time he tried to recall the number. He shook his head, minutely frustrated. 95% on his latest math test, but he could not even count his girlfriend’s climaxes. After a moment’s thought, that frustration dismantled, replaced by a swelling pride. While the tally may have been lost on him - each one of them was, he chuckled against your ear, _“unforgettable.”_

A dorky snore, you shivered in his hold. “ _Ngh..._ huh?” Rubbing your eyes with your fist, you wiped away the sleep, “Levi?”

The most beautiful sight to wake up to, you could not wait until it was your daily. Levi smiled before kissing your forehead, _“Let me take you home.”_


	38. Phone Sex (NSFW)

**Word count: 3600  
Tags: NSFW, sexting, phone sex, fem!reader**

Time away from each other always dragged. It was why the traffic had felt especially bad, why this elevator ride felt especially slow, why the day ahead felt especially long for him today. Adjusting his tie, Levi sighed longingly - wishing it was your fingers on him instead. 

Throughout the stretch of office suite, he gave glazed-over nods to the staff he passed by. His expression stayed tired, bored, uninterested until two prompt vibrations whirred against his chest. By two fingers, he pinched the phone from his pocket and spun it into orientation. Eyes widened instantly.

> “I miss you, darling.”

Bittersweet. Half of him wanted to smile - your kind words, the rare pet name. Half of him wanted to frown - this shitty business trip, the reason you were kept apart. Split instinct resulted in his lips remaining flat. Despite his true feelings, the polarization kept him appearing emotionless - a common occurrence for him. Walking and texting:

> “I miss you, too.” > “Holding up?”

In some ways yes. In others, no. This trip was only a once annual occurrence. For that, you were thankful. But on the other hand, it meant you were pitifully unused to being separated from him. Back then, you had no idea how much you would miss being able to talk to him whenever you wanted, being able to look at him whenever you wanted, being able to touch him whenever you wanted. _Three days? Five days? Seven?_ You had started to lose count. Your body’s longing for him though, however many days it was - was that many days too long.

You had slept in his t-shirt and boxers, but this morning, you were rudely awakened to find the craving unsatisfied. Still in his clothes, twirling yourself in his side of the bed, you texted:

> “How long ‘til you’re back?”

The time it had taken you to reply, the repeated appearance and disappearance of three bouncing dots - you had not answered his question about how you were holding up. However, given your response time and the visible pondering on his screen, the silent answer was _not well_. Levi traded his briefcase to the opposite hand before typing back with quick fingers.

> “I’ll be home soon.”

The instant you read the words was the instant your situation became unignorable. Fingers dipped down to the hem of his shirt, curled the cotton, and brought the bundle to your yearning center. _Not soon enough._ You flung your phone aside, increasingly frustrated.

Levi unlocked the door to his office, hung his coat on the back of his swivel chair, and took a tired seat. Booting up his computer, he took the start-up time to look at his phone again. 

> “What are you up to?”

The slow in the office was silently communicated - you were quick to pounce on it. 

> “I’m still in bed.”

Levi smirked, a pleasant image in his mind. _I wish I was there was_ what he was about to say, but you took the words right from his hands.

> “And I wish you were here.”

“Oh…” to himself, he sighed aloud.

> “What I wouldn’t give for that.”

The fastest texts you had ever sent, too unhinged to even notice.

> “I’m in your clothes, but it’s not the same.”

> “I need your touch, Levi.”

Those five words sent shivers down his spine. A long train of thought was cut off by three swift knocks on his door.

“Mr. Ackerman?”

Instinctively, Levi slammed his phone face-down against the desk. The door was still closed, but the feeling was exactly that of being caught red-handed. “Yes?” A hint of panic in his voice only you would have picked up. 

Petra, the intern assigned to him for this week, called from outside. “Your coffee order?”

Quickly, he spoke. “The usual, please.”

“Right on it, sir.”

Tiny footsteps faded away, with it, a deep breath. That sweet voice came as a scary reminder. The scene had to be safer, as safe as could be at least. Windows made two walls of his office, steel eyes scanned out them carefully. Cubicles of his coworkers hid him from their gaze, but too unreliably. Brushing his front, he swiftly stood from the chair and cinched his blinds shut.

Levi pulled his shirt taut as he sat down again. An unusual giddiness in his grip as he turned the phone over. Jaw tightened. Five texts in a row from you, he could not read fast enough. 

> “These sheets smell like you.” > “So does your pillow.” > “I have it wedged between my legs - hope that’s okay.” > “I just couldn’t help myself. ” > “When it comes to you, I never can.”

Another round of chills, Levi cursed under his breath. Fingertips danced across the screen in a way almost as natural as sex itself. 

> “Such a bad girl, such a filthy act - but I can’t do much from here.” > “I’ll remember it when I get back.”

Open eyes saw the morning sun. Aware ears heard birds chirping. When you closed yourself off, though, you escaped to something else entirely. You saw him in those black briefs, handcuffs spinning around his knuckles. You heard his slow drawn breaths, the slap of the paddle against his palm. _Get over here now._

> “I hope you do.”

Dainty fingers trailed down past your waist, hips, and panties. Sneaking under them, they found their way innately. Right and left hands took turns managing the conversation and your pleasure.

> “I want it, Levi. I want it now.”

Looking down to his phone meant looking down to his lap - both of which told: he felt the same.

> “Impatient are we?”

Impatience was not the half of it. Overriding was a profound lust that not only refused to sleep, but refused to even keep quiet. _I need it._

> “I need you.”

His desktop had long since started up, but his eyes were on a different screen.

> “You’re so distracting. You know that?”

10 AM rolled around and you were still in bed. Not only that, but if things continued the way there were going, you had a feeling you would be there a lot longer. 

> “I could say the same to you.” > “I can’t stop thinking about you...”

Brow cocked, about to text back, but your response was better than anything he could have come up with.

> “between my legs.”

Levi choked on his own breath, choked on a lot of things. Your words, though abrupt, were not unwelcome. More importantly, though, had you forgotten he was at work already? An 8 hour day ahead of him? Maybe your desire had clouded it all from you. Maybe it was just that blinding. Maybe the effect was contagious. 

> “I can’t stop thinking about that either.”

His eagerness prompted a giddiness that spread from head to toe, driving your actions. You watched as your thumb hit the camera icon, as your hold lowered to the space between your legs, as you hiked up your shirt and revealed all your curves. Two fingers spread yourself open for the camera - for him, showing the proof that you meant every word. 

> “Like this?”

Levi threw his hand over his mouth, muffling a few exhilarated gasps. Pupils dilated at your pic. To himself, he muttered an uncontainable yes, baby. His walls had been broken, the facade undermined, he spoke his mind without hesitation.

> “Fuck, do I miss that view.”

The longer he stared, the more he noticed, the deeper his infatuation swelled. In the forefront, a glisten sparkled along your folds. In the center of the frame, voluptuous curves were peaked with erect buds. At the top, plumped lips bit down on his collar. No matter which way he viewed it, you were turned on in every way - which in a sinisterly cyclic sense, was his number one weakness as well. He felt his heart race, his pants tighten, his mouth instinctively salivate.

> “I want to taste you.”

His words made you smile, but your idea made you smirk. With talk like this, you were typically putty in his hands. Though he had not send you any photos, you had a clear visual in mind. His gaze was probably calm - his lips probably flat. For once, you wanted to turn the tables - and in more ways than one.

With your right index, you swiped your sex. With your left thumb, you snapped the pic. With your newfound confidence, you hit send.

The shot: innocent eyes, tasting tongue, creamy fingers. The text: 

> “Nice and sweet.”

Sweated white knuckles made a contrast to the sleek black phone. You had no idea what you were doing to him, but if you did, you were the best and baddest girl on earth. 

_No, this isn’t like you._ You were the type to send good morning texts and squished cheeks selfies. He had no idea what had gotten into you, but right now, he did not care, cause goddamn did he love it.

“Mr. Ackerman?”

Shooting up straight in his chair, an immediate fluster. For a second, he felt thankful for having shut the blinds earlier. However, shades could not hide the disarray in his voice. “Business?”

Meekly, “Your tea.”

_Back already?_ Levi silenced his phone - thus silencing you - and placed it in the top drawer, hiding the audible evidence of the conversation. By his grip under the desk, he pulled his chair in, doing his best to hide the visible aspect. “Come in.”

Sensing sensitivity, Petra made her entrance and exit prompt. The paper cup hit the wooden desk with a uniform sound. As quickly as she had arrived, she was trying to leave likewise.

From miles away, you had placed a roughness in his throat. Levi lifted folded hands to his lips and coughed before whispering, “Thanks.”

The intern paused at the door and looked back. Concern across her face, his well-being was part of her job, a crucial component at that. “Sir? Are you sick?”

“No.” Clearing his throat, “I’m fine.” He paused - no mirror in the room, he started to wonder just how obvious his fever was. A pair of eyes, he took the opportunity to check. “Why?”

“You - ” knit brows, squinted eyes, she took a closer look. “You just look a little flushed.” 

Sweat trickled down his neck. Not much could rile him, but this was enough to make anyone anxious as hell. Despite his inner qualms, his stoic exterior remained. Two slow blinks, a calm silence, he was thankful for his resting bored face as his assistant’s worry seemed to disintegrate. Left palm waved her off, silently urging, _Please just go._

“Right,” she nodded, “just let me know if you need to reschedule anything.”

Eyes darted across his desk’s flattop. “When is my first meeting?”

Punctuality a part of her job, she spared not even a glance at the time, “15 minutes.”

Lips fell apart briefly before Levi clenched his jaw, biting back the mischievous voice in his head. _I have time..._

An inadvertent quiet as he thought it over. She checked, “Will that do?”

With a new goal in sight, his voice finally returned level. “That’ll work.”

“Right.” She smiled, “Just let me know if there’s anything you need.”

Only one thing came to mind. “Petra, if you could...” nonchalantly, “shut the door behind you.”

// // //

Door to his room slammed behind him - a symbol of his breaking resilience. Finally, he was back in the hotel. Finally, he had sound solitude. Finally, he could really do something about the situation in his pants - the one you had been stirring since 10 AM. Hanging the _do not disturb_ sign, threading the chain lock, he secured both his time and privacy. 

Haphazardly, he dropped his briefcase on the floor with a thud. Shouldering off his coat, he draped it over the bathroom door rather than the hanger. Any and all confines, he freed himself from them. 

Sturdy hand-spun the phone out of his pocket, swiping to call, ringing you on speed-dial. 

You picked up on the second ring, making his ego swell. “Hello?”

Levi began loosening his tie, uncharacteristically kicking off his shoes. “... Hey.”

His voice was low, gruff, you only heard it in certain settings. But without the visuals, you failed to pinpoint. Your voice suddenly shaky, “H-How was work, darling?”

“Tch.” _Playing innocent._ “Listen.” Hand then knee, he crawled onto his king bed, still in his work clothes. “There’s something I need you to do.”

“Mmm?” Lighthearted. Oblivious. “What is it?”

Levi rolled his eyes. As if the day had not been enough of a test, you just had to pull his leg. In person, he would give you a spank. But for now, this just had to do. One hand kept his phone at his ear. The other began unbuckling his belt, undoing the first of his buttons. “I have specific directions.”

“Alright.” You propped up your shoulder, sandwiching your cell in the crease of your neck, freeing your hands. “What do you need me to do?”

At your words, Levi shivered, back rocking against the dark wood headboard. Past the shuddering, his voice remained level - leaving you no insight to the eroticism on the other end of the line. “Go into our bedroom.”

A series of footsteps. The creaks in the floorboards, though faint, told him exactly where you were - told him that you were doing exactly what he wanted you to. 

As soon as he heard you twist the door handle, “In our closet, on the right side…”

_The right side? That’s my side…_ “Yeah?”

“The dresser. Top drawer.”

Your delicates. A gulp he could hear, he felt his pants tighten in response. “Okay.”

It was the first time you got a clue towards his weakness. A long exhale, he ordered, “Take out that babydoll dress, the matching thigh-highs. Put them on.” Sooner than he envisioned, his hand could not help but start. Over his pants, he palmed himself. “No need for panties.”

On your end, you stuttered, hardly believing what you were hearing, hardly believing what was happening. You never figured him one for phone sex, it was catching you off-guard in only the best way. _Where is this coming from?_

On his end, he bit his lip. “Come on, sweetheart. Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

The absence of a reply was not the absence of an answer. On the other end, you heard him exhale, “You distracted me all day, you know that right?”

A giddy laugh, “Did I?”

“Oh yes, you did.” 

Satisfaction tugged your lips. You had a feeling you had riled him, but it was a different gratification altogether to hear him admit it. Fingers instinctively started to sneak underneath the dress’s skirt.

“You wanted my attention, now you can have it. All of it, undivided.”

Through the phone, he heard your fabric rustling, telling him that you had followed his orders thus far - that you were ready for the next one.

“Now,” he sighed, “get on the bed.”

// // //

_Bring the hem to your mouth._

_Bite down with your teeth._

_Left hand to your cunt._

_Right hand to your clit._

_Lick your fingers clean._

_Tell me how you taste._

_Again._

Each and every order he gave, you followed without protest. As silly as it seemed, the process he directed resulted in a feeling you had never experienced on your own before. That is, at least, not _completely_ on your own. You started to wonder if he thought this way when he was the one playing you, however, after losing count of his instructions, the speculation started to waver.

Levi brought the phone from his face. Not wanting to part from your call, he checked the time in a split second. It had only been a few minutes, but you had already reached that particular octave. Levi kept the phone away while he laughed, but returned it to tease, “Pretty noisy on that end...” 

“I’m -” breath caught in your throat, each revelation between your legs an added fire to your already burnt heat. “I’m really sensitive…”

“Ah?” At his intonation, you felt yourself drip down your own digits. Interest piqued, he mocked, “So soon…”

Your heart skipped some crucial beats. “Y-Yeah…”

The nerve in your voice gave a clue he could not ignore. Your tone had it all spelled out for him. Still, he could not help himself - he just had to hear it. “Why is that, huh?”

The feeling of being called on, but your answer wary at best. Lips began to stammer, an accidental replacement in lieu of a verbal response. He picked up your pause and preyed on it. “Just how bad have you been today, little lady?”

“So bad…” you whined, “so bad, Levi.”

A low growl on the other side made your insides twitch. “Filthy little slut…”

Biting your lip, “your filthy little slut.”

A sadistic smile. That’s right, princess. But this was no time for praise. He thought back to your prior messages. 

_Such a bad girl, such a filthy act - but I can’t do much from here. I’ll remember it when I get back._

_I want it, Levi. I want it now._

In the dim lights of the hotel room, an enlightened glimmer sparkled in his eye. “Oh, that’s right.” Levi moaned, a tinge of performance. “Your punishment.”

That tone, if not for everything else that had transpired, told you one thing: _you’ve fucked up, my love._

“Levi,” a sweet sting in your core made you stammer, “Levi, I…”

_No talking your way out of this one._ Rubbing his thumb over his leaking slit, he sandwiched his collar between his own lips, hiding the insight: he had been just as bad, he was just as vulnerable as you were.

“Faster.”

“Harder.”

“Faster.”

“Harder.”

From the audio at his ear, he could tell you were following. He gave you no signs, but each of his commands was not only for you. Each _faster_ and _harder_ , though implied to be yours, was actually followed by himself on the other end. It was as if he was experiencing it with you, and since he could not, this was the next best thing.

That overwhelming desire blinded you both from the reality of your separation. When you heard his deliberate demands, it was as if he was so clearly in the room with you. When he heard your dire need, it was as if he was there and bringing you to climax. Despite how desperate you became, he never let up. With how good you were both feeling, why would he? The thought of slowing down was the furthest thing from his mind, no matter how overstimulated you were.

Still, he repeated.

“Faster.”

“Harder.”

Underneath slickened fingers, you felt your arousal aching. That midday exercise, you were feeling its sore now. A pleasure that was nearing painful, you begged to the one person you knew to - the one person who would not show mercy, certainly not in the throes of punishment.

However, in such desperation, you had no choice. “ _L-Levi! I…!_ ” You cried out, _“I can’t - !”_

“Yes, you can.” His voice low and gruff - to most he would sound calm, but you knew it as his tell: he was close. “You can and you will.” His own peak nearing, he and you both needed it now. “Cum for me.”

Clenching your teeth, you attempted to bar your screams. However, he could see it all so clearly. The picture you painted, he knew exactly what was happening. “Let them out, baby.”

With the insane head rush you were feeling, you simply did not have the thought to do anything but obey. As the waves crashed throughout your body, they continuously compounded your pleasure. Twitching fingers pinched your nipples, frenzied at your sex. Legs writhed against, toes curled into the sheets - the satin crunch barely audible past the high-pitched song of long-awaited sensation.

Each sigh and shriek, each groan and gasp, guided his movements. Harsh pulls when you moaned and rough pushes when you whined - your melody created a rhythm in a perfect composition. Your signature note, the breathless _“Levi...”,_ was always his limit. Knowing that you had gotten there, it was the green light for him to dive in after you. Even through the phone, even from across the country, you were still the one to push him over the edge.

With your call of his name came the snap. Hand instinctively tightened around his member, a flurry of rapid strokes all focused at his tip. Shoulders shuddered against the wooden slate. Back arched into the feathered pillow. Free hand yearned to be anchored, reaching for something, anything, to sturdy himself in the wake of this flood. However, after such a trial, there existed nothing that could help him now. Reprieve of a long day’s work. His sounds amplified for your ears only. _Let them out, baby._

Squinted eyes fluttered open, gradually bringing him to. Instead of his room, his bed, his love, the dark and empty hotel was a rude awakening. Coming back from his fantasy only made him realize just how much he missed home, missed the real thing, missed you. However, even with this eye-opener, complaints were the furthest thing from his mind. That incredible pleasure still lingering, the most he managed was a longing sigh. 

“I love how hard you can make me cum.” _From all the way over there._

“Oh, Levi…” a breathless chuckle gave him chills, “just wait till I get my hands on you.”


	39. Met Your Match (NSFW)

**Word count: 4000  
Tags: NSFW, levi x reader, fluff turned smut, modern!AU, fem!reader**

Time on the dashboard read 4:45 PM. Taking in the sights of your hometown, it seemed you would arrive right on time - as always - in the most important of moments.

After many months of dating, you were finally introducing your boyfriend to your parents. You would have liked to delay it even longer, but there always came a point when your parents’ suggestions implicitly became demands. Until recently, you had put off their introduction again and again, but with their increasingly frequent calls and texts, your autonomy was being put to the test. Besides, the last thing you wanted to do was make them think you were hiding something - that there was a reason you did not want them to meet.

In fact, it was completely the opposite. Levi Ackerman, your new boyfriend, you thought him the best around. To show him off to anyone and everyone was an easy sell. Sure, you were still in the first-year honeymoon period, but both of you would have been lying if you said you did not feel very serious about the other. You had not yet admitted it to each other, but the thought of marriage had crossed both of your minds, was dwelling in his. That said, of course, being married - or even engaged - without this parental milestone, you were sure your mother would send you to an early grave. Before your relationship could reach its goal, it had to take the steps to get there. Even if it meant dragging your introvert to your hometown for a weekend at your parents’ makeshift bed and breakfast, well, he always said he would do anything for you. In more ways than one, your relationship was being put to the test.

Even up till now in the car ride there, you had not asked him how he felt about the excursion. It was not that you had not thought to do it, but rather, a combination of many reasons not to. You could already imagine the conversation:

_Are you nervous?  
No, why would I be?  
I mean, they’re my parents.  
… And?  
Well, what if they don’t like you?  
So?  
…  
What are you gonna do? Break up with me or something?_

It was then that you stopped yourself. Not only did these thoughts do no good, but they were especially harmful this close to the destination. Turning onto your block, things looked both so different and so familiar all at once. It was time to orient your headspace and that meant shoving out the imagination of the worst-case scenario.

As the sun continued its journey from east to west, you drifted your gaze to the driver likewise. A dark sweater overtop and a light ironed dress shirt underneath. Cotton neckband peeked out of the cashmere collar. Charcoal sleeves, rolled up at the elbows, revealed pastel cuffs curled over. Black jeans, cuffed at the bottom, made his legs look longer, showing one inch of matching patterned socks. For this occasion, you had not told him how to dress, but as with so many other things, he just knew.

Maybe it would be fine. No, you corrected yourself, _it’ll be great._

// // //

Thanks to your dad working in the garage, eye contact was first made through the glass windshield as you pulled in the driveway. You could not remember the last time you felt so nervous to see him, not since you brought home that one report card or knocked over the inherited vase. In a last-second frenzy, your mind raced over ways to get out of this. A fake stomach ache, forgetting your toothbrush, maybe you could just jut the car in reverse yourself.

Instead, your guest made a swift exit. Turning the key, unbuckling his seatbelt, he let himself out and pivoted to your side. One firm hand on the handle and one on top of the frame, he tugged your door open and took your hand in his. For a second, your eyes widened and jaw hinged, but you quickly snapped them shut. You did not want to give it away, but this gentlemanly gesture was a rare luxury. Looking up to meet his gaze, you caught a glimpse of something more. _Don’t be so nervous. I know what I’m doing._ A relieved grin, you pulled yourself up from the passenger seat and - with a new skip in your step - made a brisk carefree pace to your dad.

Your greeting was typical, but with a tinge of mutual excitement. “And this is - “ you opened up to your side, but your guest was not yet there. Back at the car, the trunk was propped open as he unloaded all the luggage. _Whoops_. You had forgotten about it but maybe that was for the better. His backpack around his shoulders, your bags tucked under his arms and in his hand. Fingers turning white were his only sign of struggle, his step remained steady and his expression relaxed. Watching him carry your luggage, your father gave a series of subtle nods. Unbeknownst to you, your mother gleamed from inside the house and through the kitchen window. Dressing up for dinner, holding the door for you, now bringing in your belongings - your parents had already been impressed even before “hello.”

The way that your dad towered over him had you feeling slightly nervous - as if you were introducing your high school boyfriend or prom date. Levi, on the other hand, showed no signs of intimidation. A firm handshake, modest smile, and “nice to meet you” all made the model first impression. Beneath the shadow of your hair, you smiled to yourself, _That’s not quite how ours went._

Brief pleasantries and talk of the weather - you deliberately saved the real getting-to-know for the dinner table - afterward, your dad took a few strides towards the car, eyes scanning carefully. Even though Levi had only just met him, it was obvious to more than just his daughter: he was in admiration of the ride. Taking in its pristine reflection, he asked, “You wash it yourself or take it in?”

“Myself.” Levi affirmed, “I don’t trust anyone else to do it right.”

Though he had simply spoken the truth, it had already earned that hearty chuckle from your father - one you had not heard since the last time you were home. He pointed a finger towards your date and nodded, “I like that, Levi.”

Just as Levi has read his body language, it seemed like your dad understood his as well. Sparing him the hand clamp on the shoulder, giving you a sigh of relief, he instead gave one keen grin before turning around and leading the way inside. “Let’s head in. Dinner should be just about ready.”

The second his back turned, you snuck Levi a quick glance, _It’s going well already._

Curved smile and a tilt of his head, _I know._

// // //

At the front door, opening to the kitchen, you met your mother’s attention. In a split second exchange that only a mother and daughter could have, you conveyed your love for him, she conveyed her approval of him. All throughout your life, she had never let you forget how wonderful you were, how smart you were, how beautiful you were, how you deserved the best man on earth. With that one look, you both spoke silently, _He could be the one._

Not as subtle, though, was her greeting. Skipping past you and to the new guest, she called, “Levi!” If the smile on your mother’s face was not wide enough, her volume was an indicator of her enthusiasm - loud and clear. “It’s so great to meet you!”

Without a thud, Levi set down just enough luggage to meet another handshake. Two oven mitts made a sandwich with his hand. If he was clammy, she would have no clue, but with his composure, it was clear he was in smooth sailing. A smile wider than the one he had greeted your father with, he chimed his reciprocation, “It’s great to finally meet you, too.”

Their smiles were contagious. Watching your two worlds combine so seamlessly, you never imagined it would go this well. You could not have made it go so well, even if you tried.

But that was the thing: while he was being so prim, proper, polite, it was also evident - he had not faked a single part. He may have had a dirty mouth and sense of sarcasm when you were in private, but today came as a pleasant reminder - he was truly a gentleman through and through. Sure, your parents had their quirks - you had complained about them plenty of times - but the fact was that if not for them, he would not have you. The least he could do was be a good guest which, for him, came effortlessly. _Like most things,_ you smirked.

“Well, Levi, I hope you’ll enjoy dinner tonight. I figured, ‘what better than the family recipe when to get to know the family?’” Your mother’s glee was without bounds. You flickered your gaze and twitched your lips, a nervous neutralizer to her naivety.

“Smells great, I can’t wait to try it.” That kindred tinge to his voice, you thought to gape over your shoulder. Instead, you ground yourself, furthering the facade that he was always this warm.

“Well, Levi, that means a lot coming from you!” You swore, you had never seen your mother cook with such tempo. “My daughter tells me you’re quite the chef!”

A single breath chuckle made your heart skip, “Really? She’s never told me that.” An elbow perched on the counter supported his slight lean, “No matter what I make, she always says, ‘my mom makes it better’.”

Two unison laughs from your parents, you bit your lip, _This is going so well._ Your dad noogied your head as he joked, “She’s a handful, isn’t she?”

Still angled against the countertop, Levi divided his attention carefully. His words spoke to your parents, his wink to you, “A handful indeed.”

// // //

Setting the table, refilling the drinks, even insisting on doing the dishes, Levi had gone above and beyond throughout the whole night. With eyebrow raises and plenty of thanks, through both body and spoken language, your parents’ approval was spelled out for both of you. Of course, you had been on pins and needles the entire time, but Levi’s innate courtesy took the edge off, to say the least.

Sweet dessert and candy wine wound you down along with the time. From the first eye contact to small talk, from 5 PM to midnight, this had all gone better than anyone could have planned. As they discussed his line of work, congratulated him on status, your gaze drifted from your empty glass around the room. All was sound _except..._ Eyes widened at your baggage still flattening the doormat. You choked on your own breath, _Of all the first impressions they could have of him…. being a slob?_ No one - not you, not them, least of all him - could live with that takeaway.

Clearing your throat, “ _Ahem_ \- Levi, darling...” your princessy tone was a deliberate choice, implying that you always lived like one, “would you put those in my -” you corrected yourself, “in our room?”

Since you moved out, your childhood bedroom had been turned into a guestroom. When your parents phoned you and asked - once again, one of those suggestions turned demands - you gave a reluctant yes. Now that your significant other was spending the night, though, you were thankful that they had taken the initiative: exchanging your twin bed for a queen and your teenage posters for floral paintings. _Sometimes,_ you shook your head, _parents really do know best._

“Oh my gosh! Look at the time!” Your mom exclaimed, “You two must be exhausted after all that driving.”

“Yeah, of course!” Even your dad’s voice began to boom, “Get some sleep. Hot breakfast and coffee first thing in the morning! Wouldn’t want to miss that, right?”

With a turn of his head, Levi exchanged a quick glance with you, an unspoken, _What do you say?_

As smoothly as it had gone, the night was ending likewise. You would have to do it all again tomorrow, but it seemed neither you nor him had any qualms about that. In fact, you sparkled, knowing that each second spent together was one more that they would get to know and love him - one more step towards _So, when is the engagement? The wedding? The house? The kids?_

As you had shooed away the spiraling thoughts earlier, you did so again now. The last display of composure was merely this walk to the bedroom. The end in sight.

Signing off on the first night, Levi followed your lead as you stood from the table, “Yeah, we are pretty tired. We probably should head to bed.”

“Thanks so much for coming over!” You giggled at your mother’s giddiness, never having once left throughout the whole night, “We’ll be better hosts tomorrow and actually show you the house, huh?”

“Please.” Through combed bangs, his steel eyes shined, “The pleasure was ours.”

// // //

Behind closed doors, you at last had full reprieve to be yourself - no longer an audience to impress, you finally felt at home. Without shame, deviant eyes drank up the dark sights. A stupid smile on your face, a long-lost sense of teenage rebellion revived as you ate up the eye candy. By a grip at the middle of his back, Levi tugged his sweater off and over his head, forcing his hair to fray, coercing a few tired shakes of his head back and forth. Slender fingers worked his buttons, slowly revealing his chest, rising and falling with tired sighs. Unbuckling his belt, stepping out of his pants, you admired every inch of him that you had not yet already. 

As he threw his arms into the grey cotton long sleeve, he took a moment before putting it on. A smug, “Can I help you?”

You smirked, nibbling on your fingertip, “I’m just fine, thanks,” you sauntered closer, pressing one hand to his pecs, an elbow hooking around the back of his undercut, “and so is my boyfriend.”

A blend of mocking and appreciation you only heard from him. Sneering, “You embarrass me, you know that?”

Nail outlined his muscles, happy that he still had not yet donned the garment, “You did good out there today.”

Placing his hand atop yours, he pulled your touch up, off, away from his chest. “Let’s do even better.” Keeping hold of your hand, he dragged you both onto the mattress and underneath the sheets. Tugging the loose strands from your face, he gave a light kiss on your forehead and spoke against your skin, teasing through a whisper, “Be a good girl and get some sleep.”

// // //

At your side, his breathing slowed as he strayed off towards sleep. For you, the opposite. Heart racing. Sweat forming. Ache throbbing.

You could not put a finger on what it was. Whether it was how perfectly he dressed, how perfectly he had conducted himself, how perfect he was today and every day, you could not tell the primary source of your infatuation. Perhaps all of his ingredients had comprised one dire cocktail. As much as he charmed your parents, he did you even more. The same bedroom where you dreamed of finding your Prince Charming, you were now in that same bedroom with him. All of it had set you off, hormones raging just like they had back in their heyday. Your body moved - both as if not your own, but also in the purest form of yourself. Palms pushed yourself up from the mattress, legs swung to his sides, hips found his and ground against them as you buried your face in his neck.

Of course, he already knew what you were doing. _And of course,_ he should have known, _you would do it at a time like this._

“Really, brat?” He scoffed. In the dark of night, his exhale on your lips tickled even more than usual. “Tonight? Of all nights?”

You lowered yourself even further, pressing your bodies together from chests to calves. Fingers dove into his hair, lazily tugging his ear to your mouth as you whispered, “I can’t help myself, Levi.”

That much was obvious. Clearly, you had turned a blind eye to such a stupid risk. Objectively, your hosts were just a few dangerous stretches away. However, your vision was clouded by an increasingly unignorable lust, obstructing your sight to only the dark black gap under the door and the handsome man beneath you, tainted in obsidian by your hovering shadow. You could see only those two things, and in your short-circuited mind, they told only two things: you had privacy and passion both in arms reach.

You let your desire speak for you, telling both yourself and him, “It - It’ll be fine.”

// // //

Such an empty lie, such a possessive thirst, they were the only things that could bring you to the scene you had set for yourself now: grinding against your boyfriend during your weekend back home.

Dragging your hips back and forth, you were thankful for the uncharacteristic choice to pack a nightgown. Rather than the thick cotton flannel of pajama pants, underneath your skirt, thin silk panties made direct and demanding friction with his hardening member. Hands cupped around his shoulders - fingers clenching, nails digging - as you strove for any source of support through each and every building wave.

He would never instigate at a time like this, but at the same time, he would never hold back when faced with his sex kitten. Hands snaked from their hold in your hair and caress at your nape - down past your waist, hips, and lower back - until finding the peak of your cheeks and squeezing them tightly. His knuckles turned pale as he savored your feel. Your mouth agape as you submit to his vice.

That hold on your ass, he never let up. Instead, he tightened even more, garnering leverage to encourage your oscillation up and down his length. Was he increasing his pleasure? Yours? Both? In this darkness, you could not see that far ahead. Taking up all your thoughts now, was only the fun you were having at the one time you were supposed to refrain from it.

He had the same thought. To get off at a time like this, your drive must have been unbelieveable. Certainly, in your typical frame of mind, you never would have chosen to do this here and now. His mind began to wander, just how madly you must have been in love with him, sending his libido skyhigh with yours.

Wafting against your neck, a breathlessly amused and enamored sigh, “You like that, huh?” Levi reached a hand down to your sex, pulling your panties and his underwear down to your ankles. Without any layers between you, your pleasure amplified immensely, along with it, your cries.

“Ah ah ah,” He warned, his whisper impossibly light. Perhaps you had forgotten about the danger lurking outside, but neither his awareness nor his control ever wavered, not even in the hottest of heats. In one swift motion, Levi stretched his forearm in alignment with your spine and cradled the back of your head in his hand. Thanks to his muscle, even as he rolled you both over, the crunch of the mattress and sifting of sheets were barely audible. With the role reversal, you instinctively clutched his back and whimpered.

Levi pressed his lips hard and fast against yours, effectively silencing you. Tongue swiped at your lips, demanding his entrance. Teeth grazed your tongue in guidance, preventing those troublesome sounds. His muscle reached just above the back of your throat - the perfect location to block those noises without the threat of your choking. Steady palm caressed your cheek, relaxing. Careful thumb rubbed your face, settling. Slowly, he pulled from the kiss to a distance just close enough - you could hear even the faintest intrigue from his depths, “Can you be a good girl?”

With your saturated gaze and vulnerable tone, you promised your best and begged, “Y-Yes, Levi…” You moaned, “I will be a good girl for you.”

It was as if you had signed a contract. Only with the promise of your best kept silence would he provide the pleasure that made you scream. A half-hover over you, Levi placed himself perfectly between your legs. Arms at your sides. Hands beneath your back. His leaking tip lined up to your dripping arousal - both just like and unlike it had so many times before. A few preliminary thrusts, he knew he already had your consent, but he could not help but ask once more. A bite on your ear, smooth lips soothed it with a purr, “You ready, princess?” 

If his goal was to keep you quiet, he should have known better. Not only did you nod - and nearly squeal - but you wrapped your legs around him, beckoning for that specific proximity and angle. Within the short stretch that your eyes could see, you easily made out that trademark stare of his. One brow arched, half-shut eyes peeked to you, barely parted lips revealed a smirk that checked, _You sure you want to do that?_

But clearly, you knew what you wanted and would do anything to get it. It would be wrong to deny you for a single moment further, for each second was one more that your passion yearned so much that it hurt, one more that you could be walked in on, one more that the risk increased.

In case your using him as a toy, your vehement asking, _fuck - even your phermones_ , were not enough, the feeling of your sex showed your hand. The warm and wet of your walls coated him entirely on only the first thrust, such that he could fuck deeper and deeper, faster and faster right from the start. Now, you were not the only one who could not contain yourself. In fact, you wondered, maybe you were handling it better than him.

His abdomen flexed, chest heaved, veins protruded, _“Fuck…. F’Fuck me….!”_

In missionary, he liked to spice things up - hair pulling, nipple pinching, neck sucking, ear biting. Tonight, though, he was utterly incapacitated. Maybe it was heightened sensitivity in the pitch black night. Maybe it was the feeling of your sex. Maybe it was even the release of those ropes and reins. After being tied up and restrained all night, he was finally set free. Not only that, but you had been the one to both link those chains in the first place and also the one to cut them off at the end of the night. The change had him riled, and after such a trying day, there was not much more he could take.

Who would have thought, the day he met your parents, that you would be the one keeping him on his toes? His pace became erratic, and thus, so did your screams. In that instant, you forgot where you were entirely. But even in the throes of it, he did not. Your instinct was as it always was - to tell him when you were close. But as your back arched, lips parted, scream brewed, his instinct was just as alert. Even as his own orgasm began to take control from him, he first took care of you. Hot hand clamped around your mouth, muffling your helpless blend of gasps, moans, and shrieks.

Pulsating pleasure interrupted his sentiment, but with his hand silencing you, it was conveyed all the same - if not better. _“Shh’hh!”_ His breaths were cut off in rhythm with each filling shot you felt within. In a debate for what to say - _shut up, keep it down, be quiet,_ and many more - his sentences were instead an incoherent mix of syllables, all of which felt kind on your ears regardless. Even for someone so perfect like him, his mind could become clouded every once in a while, especially around you.

Finally, you had found the man you deserved.


End file.
